Love Won't Leave : Part One
by agapeandzoe
Summary: This story takes place after the episode "Lead" when Alex returns. After 5 years, Olivia has finally moved on, or has she? Alex Cabot enters Olivia's life once again and on the heels of their budding, rekindled relationship, they must deal with an unexpected struggles that will test their love. Will they survive? Updates often!
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: I have been reading fanfiction, for the first time, all summer. I am for any possible shippings that involve Olivia. Whether it's Olivia and Fin, Olivia and Alex, Olivia and Elliot…it doesn't matter.**

**I have also noticed that everyone states, before they write, that they own nothing.**

**Therefore, I do not own anything. Dick Wolf does…**

**I hope you enjoy my first steamy fanfic. If interested, I have two books published as well. You can find them online in the usual locations.**

**Thank you and, as they say, reviews are love!**

_**Note: This takes place right after Alex's return from in season 10 after "Lead".**_

1

She struggled to keep her eyes open after seventy-eight hours without sleep. Sure, she caught a couple hours here and there in the cribs but they were far from sufficient. Her eyes flicked upward to the windshield as headlights flashed and then darted by, the lights jarring her from impending sleep.

As the car came to a stop, she felt a hand on her shoulder. "Liv? We're here," Elliot smiled. "Do you want some help up your stairs or do you think you can make it? I can walk you in, since it's almost midnight…"

"Wh-? No…I got it…thanks El…" she grabbed her duffel from the floorboard, opened the door, and got out, sticking her head back inside before closing the car door.

"Get some rest, Liv," he said, smirking, "you look like hell…"

"Thanks. You look gorgeous, too," she smiled.

She closed the door and continued talking through the opened window, "You get some rest, too. Thanks for the ride. I'll see you on Monday."

She turned and began walking towards her building, zigzagging from exhaustion in the process. Her eyes closed momentarily as she opened the main door. She didn't think she had ever felt this tired before. She was not only physically exhausted, but emotionally fatigued, as well.

Blinking hard and shaking her head, she approached the elevators, which were already, thankfully, open and waiting for her. In the midst of her weariness, she pressed the wrong floor before the correct one. Knowing she would be at least sixty-seconds later to her bed because of her fumbling, she leaned back into the corner of the gold-walled elevator and sighed, closing her eyes once again.

_Alex Cabot._

She couldn't believe that the counselor was back in Manhattan. Had _been_ back in Manhattan for God knows how long. At the end of the Lynwood trial, she had looked into the beautiful, statuesque ADA's eyes and mentioned something about her really being "back". Olivia had meant that remark to be a double entendre. Or _did_ she? Yes, Alexandra Cabot was back physically, picking up her career where she had left it, but was she back like she had been before, emotionally…_mentally_?

The doors opened on the second floor as Olivia continued to keep her eyes closed, knowing she had one more flight.

Olivia's body felt like lead as she struggled to keep her legs standing. She leaned her head back against the corner and yawned heartily, not bothering to hide it.

The doors closed and this time they would take her to her floor.

The loud grumbling of her stomach suddenly reminded her that she had not eaten much over the past three days—picking on a salad here and there, a Power Bar, a few pots of coffee. She was tired, weak, and ready for a two day weekend.

The doors of the elevator opened with a clang, shaking Olivia from yet another attempt at rest. She pulled her duffle higher on her shoulder as she exited and reached in her coat pocket for her key. Unlocking her door, she pushed inside and closed it, dropping her duffle on the floor and locking the deadbolt.

_Home at last._

She removed her long black coat, threw it over a kitchen stool, and then began languidly walking down her hallway, removing her blazer and letting it fall to the floor, and then unbuttoning her blouse and lifting it from her pants. Reaching her bedroom, she discarded the rest of her clothes, leaving only her panties. She then took her oversized "I Love NY" t-shirt from her t-shirt drawer and slipped it over her head.

She knew she should eat something, but all she wanted to do was crawl under the covers and be enveloped by the warmth of her queen-sized bed.

Forcing herself, she entered the bathroom, flicking the switch on and squinting at the brightness. She squeezed toothpaste onto her toothbrush and shoved it in her mouth, looking at herself in the mirror.

_Alexandra Cabot is here._

She began brushing more vigorously, willing the tears away. That was over five years ago that they had become so close. She shouldn't be upset about it anymore. Five years is enough time to get over someone, to move on and forget that you ever loved them.

The tears were now rolling down Olivia's cheeks, mercilessly wetting the chest of her t-shirt. She wasn't even aware that they were falling until she looked at herself in the mirror, once more, after rinsing.

She patted her mouth dry and applied lip balm, still eyeing her reflection.

_Alex has moved on. She doesn't feel the same any longer._

Olivia's lower lip began to tremble and she looked at herself, crying like a buffoon. She suddenly clenched her jaw and raised her chin, determined to be stronger.

Taking a deep breath, she looked once more, steeling her eyes and turning off the light. She walked to her bed and threw the quilt and sheet back, slipping inside the comfort of her bed. She leaned over and switched the bedside lamp off and then leaned back, once again, on the pillows, closing her eyes.

No, Alex Cabot was not back in her life and Olivia had to deal with that fact. True, she was living in the same city again, but they both had different lives now. Things had changed. Life had moved on. Olivia didn't know anything about Alex's life and what was going on in it. For all Olivia knew, Alex could be married…

Fresh, salty tears began forming once again. She had held in her emotions over this woman for the past three tortuous days, having to work so closely with her on this case, and now her feelings were gushing forth, like a broken dam.

Olivia rolled onto her side to face the bedroom window as the glow from the moon cast itself onto the floor and bed. Olivia cried from exhaustion, she cried for what was once had with Alex and herself, and she cried for five years of heartache.

Olivia soon succumbed to the slumber that her body and mind needed so desperately.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Warning: Here comes the smut! **_

2

The morning sun began to shine brightly through the windows of Olivia's bedroom. With her arm draped over her eyes, she moaned as her cell phone's shrill tone reverberated throughout the bedroom. Clumsily, she reached over without looking, and picked it up from the bedside table, pressing the button she knew from memory.

"Benson," she moaned, pulling the phone from her ear and her arm from her eyes to briefly check the time on the phone's screen.

_9:38 a.m._

"Liv?" a voice meekly questioned. "I didn't wake you, did I?"

"Yeah, no…who—Alex?" She recognized the voice almost immediately. "Is everything OK?" Liv asked, pulling herself to a sitting position while scratching her side and yawning.

"Yeah, everything is fine. I was just calling—God I didn't wake you did I?" Alex floundered.

"Alex, it's OK. What's going on? We got a new case?" Olivia swung her legs to the side of the bed, cell phone still on her ear, and put her beige silk robe on with one hand, switching hands to put the other arm through.

She walked down the hallway to the kitchen and began preparing the coffee pot for the morning.

"No, no. Nothing like that," she paused, "…and go ahead and _don't _make that coffee that you're making…I'd like to take you out to brunch…"

Olivia stopped scooping and furrowed her brow. "How did you know I was making coffee?"

"Well, maybe your detective skills have rubbed off on me…I heard the glass pot clang, then water, then you opening the lid—"

"OK, OK," Olivia said with a slight smile. "Pretty good, counselor. I'm impressed." Olivia turned the switch to the coffee maker _off _and waited. "As for brunch…Alex, I'm not sure…"

There was a long pause between both women. Then, Olivia heard Alex exhale a shaky breath, "Liv, I just want to talk with you…have brunch…see how you're doing. Is it wrong for a friend to want to see how another friend is doing after five years?"

A stab was felt in Olivia's heart at the word _friend_. They had been so much more than friends. It was as though their relationship had taken a million steps backward. Olivia laughed lightly into the phone, closed her eyes and then decided to switch the coffee pot back _on_.

"I don't think that's a good idea, Alex." Olivia rested her elbow on the counter and held her forehead in her hand.

"Why not? Why isn't it a good idea? Brunch…two friends (there was that stab again) eating a meal together and talking? What's wrong with that?" Alex waited.

Olivia's eyes welled with tears once again, threatening to spill. She sniffed lightly.

"Liv?" Alex listened intently to Olivia's hesitance. "Please, just meet me at Gracie's Diner? I just want to see you and talk with you…" Alex's own voice was unsteady and pleading,

Olivia took a deep, audible breath and whispered, "OK. I'll meet you."

Calmly, Alex stated, "Great. Is 11:30 too soon?"

"Um…," Olivia looked at the clock on the microwave, "no, it's fine. I'll see you at 11:30."

"OK, bye."

Both women disconnected. Olivia turned the coffee pot back _off _and then put both elbows on the marble counter and her face in her hands. A swelling of trepidation along with an ever-so-slight excitement was felt in her chest. She felt the anxiety building, threatening to leave her incapacitated and with labored breathing that she had experienced so often after Alex left to go into WitSec all those years ago.

Olivia brought herself to stand upright, straightening her posture and deciding immediately that she was going to go through this as though she and Alex were simply having a meal together, as she put it; just a couple of old friends talking about their lives. No expectations, no commitments, just lunch and talking. Afterward, Olivia would then come home and continue her weekend. Maybe do some grocery shopping, take in a movie, finish the book she started eight months ago. It would be fine.

It _had_ to be.

Alex hung up the phone and forced away the huge smile threatening to overtake her face. She had to remain calm. Olivia didn't sound very thrilled about meeting for brunch, but Alex knew that was her fault, not Olivia's. When Alex came back three years ago, getting adjusted to her new/old identity again, it was difficult. She had been Emily for so long and it had taken time to become Alex Cabot again.

Back in Manhattan, contacting Olivia had constantly been on her mind, but Alex wasn't sure if she, herself, was still the same person. The last thing she wanted was to reconnect with Olivia and then have their relationship be nothing like it was, especially if the reason was because she had changed and wasn't the same Alex any longer.

When Olivia looked into her eyes in the courtroom yesterday afternoon and smirked, "You're really back, aren't you?" Alex couldn't help but feel as giddy as she did five years prior. As Olivia's eyes locked on her own, the emotions, the sensations, and the longing all returned in that simple moment.

Alex and Olivia had been at a point in their relationship that the next step was inevitable. They spent every evening, night, and morning together, whether it was at Alex's upper east side apartment or in Olivia's apartment on 79th Street. Then, they saw each other at work, as well. Juggling both sets of relationships was a bit challenging, but also a bit of a thrill for both of them and, after playing such platonic roles at work, the evenings were always a time to be themselves and let go.

Alex missed the intimacy with Olivia. No other woman could control her body as Olivia had. Every touch, kiss, nip, and bite was euphoric—like a drug. Olivia made Alex feel as though she were the only woman in the world, and every time they made love, it was as if they had all the time in the world and Alex wanted it to last forever.

Shaken from her thoughts by the chiming of a text message, Alex grabbed her phone from the counter—a reminder to pay her cell phone bill—and then realized she needed to get ready. It was 10:15 and she would need to leave by 11 to be at the diner on time.

After showering, Alex stood wrapped in a plush yellow bath towel, her blonde, towel-dried hair hanging damply down the middle of her back, staring into her closet—

nothing too formal, nothing too casual. She settled on a pair of faded boot cut jeans, a black merino wool turtleneck, and black boots. She quickly blow-dried her hair and applied minimal make-up—moisturizer, mascara, and lip gloss—before putting her boots on.

"Alex Cabot, settle down." She looked at her reflection in the bureau mirror. "This is Olivia. The woman you—" she stopped, so many thoughts coming into her head. The woman she was in love with, the woman who was her best friend, the woman that made her come undone in the bedroom every single time, the woman she was supposed to grow old with…

Alex took a deep breath, fanning air into her eyes to will them from tearing any further. She spritzed a small amount of Eclat d'Arpege, Olivia's favorite perfume, on her neck, and made her way to the kitchen. The clock on her cell read 10:59.

Ready to see Olivia's beautiful face, she eagerly grabbed her purse, phone, and keys and headed out to hail a cab.

Olivia was running late. She sat in the cab, willing the deadlocked traffic to move. She glanced down at her silver watch. It was _11:28_ and she was still about ten blocks away from the diner. Never one to be late, she reached into her purse and grabbed a twenty for the $16.85 fare she read on the tracker, and handed it to the cabbie. "Keep the change," she said firmly as she slipped out of the cab and began walking the last ten blocks to the diner.

Not wanting to wear her heavy black wool coat and desiring to be more sporty casual, Olivia chose a pair of dark wash, fitted jeans, a silky cream blouse, and her caramel-colored leather jacket, topped off with caramel-colored boots. She had just washed her hair and let it air dry, framing her face with natural, should-length waves.

She walked briskly to the diner, almost at a jog. She hated being late and was going to be as on-time as she possibly could. As she reached the diner, she glanced down at her watch 11:38. Not too bad, but still late.

Olivia could feel the perspiration on her forehead and the warm heat of the diner had her immediately flushed—or was it the vision she saw as she entered the establishment? Alex stood from the lobby bench when she saw Olivia enter, all legs in those boots and jeans, her long, silky hair pulled onto one shoulder. Olivia suddenly felt very warm. She began taking minutely deep breaths, willing herself to calm down and cool off, as she walked toward the ADA.

"Hey," Olivia breathed, smiling.

"Hey there…you look…" Alex looked Olivia over, nodding in approval, "…wonderful. Well-rested, refreshed…"

Olivia looked at Alex, her smile fading. She still didn't know how this was going to turn out. What this was… "Sorry I'm late…I took a cab and then saw the time and then ran the rest of the way, so…"

"Hey…" Alex put her hand on Olivia's shoulder and leaned in, "it's OK. I just got here myself."

"Alex, party of two?" the hostess called out among the waiting area of the diner.

"That's us." Alex raised her hand briefly at the hostess and then motioned for Olivia to go first. "After you…"

Olivia followed the hostess as they made their way back to a booth near the restrooms.

As they walked back to the booth, Alex kept her eyes on Olivia's backside. Those tight jeans she was wearing made it clear that she had not been slacking in the working out department. That ass was built on squats and lunges, along with casual jogs through Central Park or on the treadmill, a familiar routine of both she and Alex had when they were last together. Olivia's backside was just as round, high, and squeezable as it had always been.

Not shy about staring, Alex kept her eyes on Olivia's ass until she slid into the booth.

Once settled, with menus in front of them, the waitress walked away to get their drinks. Alex lowered her menu and looked at Olivia. She watched the brunette's hair, liking the naturalness and the sexy, shiny waves that framed her gorgeous face. Her olive skin looked just as soft, just as flawless. Light make-up, accentuating those deep mocha eyes, and then there was her mouth.

_God, that mouth, _Alex mused. _That mouth can do wonderful things._

Alex's eyes wandered down to the parting of Olivia's blouse, just a hint of cleavage visible from the "v" in her shirt, hinting to those full, tan breasts that were also so touchable, so kissable, so warm and comforting.

"I guess you've decided?" Olivia questioned, raising her eyebrows at Alex.

"On what?" Alex asked, her voice raspy with lust. She cleared her throat. "Oh, the menu…yeah, I will get what I always get…" She looked at Olivia, not caring that she was still staring.

Olivia peered over the top of her menu again, brown eyes meeting blue. Alex dipped her eyes back down to Olivia's breasts and subconsciously licked her lips. Her mouth was suddenly very dry.

"Here you go," the waitress came back with their drinks—a coffee and water for both women. As soon as the waitress set Alex's water down, she calmly drank half of the contents in under five seconds.

Olivia looked amused but didn't say anything.

"Have yous two decided?" The waitress took the pencil from behind her ear, licked the tip, and prepared to write.

Alex motioned for Olivia to go first.

"I'll have the open-faced tuna on whole grain and fruit instead of fries." Olivia looked to Alex to give her order.

"I will have two poached eggs on pumpernickel and a small bowl of oatmeal." Alex closed her menu and smiled at the waitress. "Thanks."

Olivia was amused with Alex's oh-so-obvious demeanor. What she couldn't figure out was whether it was nerves or something else. Olivia had caught Alex ogling her backside and her breasts. So now, Olivia was going to reverse the tables.

Alex hadn't changed much in the five years since they'd seen each other. Her silken flaxen hair was quite a bit longer now but everything else was the same. Perhaps she was a bit thinner, due to stress? Isolation? But other than that she looked liked the same angel Olivia had fallen in love with years ago. Her porcelain skin practically glowed. Those cerulean eyes sparkled and looked right through Olivia. Full, pink lips slightly parted as she watched Olivia watching her. That soft sweater she donned displayed the same perky breasts that Olivia loved to put her mouth around, tonguing until Alex begged—"

"Liv…?" Now it was Alex's turn to look amused. "Liv, close your mouth, honey." Alex took a sip of her coffee, her eyes smiling mischievously over the rim of her cup.

Olivia ran her hand through her hair and then put both hands around her mug, staring at the dark liquid intently. "Where are we, Alex?" Olivia's gaze slowly shifted upward, until both women's focus was intently absorbed with one another.

"That depends on where you _want_ to be, Liv." Alex's gaze turned intent.

Olivia shook her head slowly, "I know I don't want to get hurt…"

Alex's eyes began to fill with tears. She reached her hand across the table and placed it on Olivia's forearm, stroking it gently with her thumb. "And I don't want to ever hurt you again. That was the biggest mistake of my life. I wish I would have contacted you right away, Liv, but I didn't. I was too afraid…" Alex looked down at her own hand on Olivia's arm.

"Of what, Alex? Of me? Of work? Of Velez's guys?" Olivia moved her coffee cup out of the way and placed both of her hands on top of Alex's. "Tell me what you were afraid of…" she pleaded, almost whispering.

After a moment, Alex began, "I was afraid I was different, that I had changed, that you wouldn't love the changed me like you loved the old me. I was afraid we'd try to make it work but I would be someone you didn't know and you would resent me and it would all go to hell…" Alex's nose was running mercilessly now, tears streaked down her cheeks.

Olivia grabbed some napkins from the table dispenser and handed them to Alex. Alex took them and wiped her nose which was now red from crying. Olivia took the wad of napkins from Alex's hand and began blotting her tears, letting her thumb linger on her soft cheek, stroking it gently.

Once Alex collected herself, she began, "I promise you, Liv, I will never hurt you again. Please give me the chance to show you and prove to you…"

Olivia couldn't stop her own emotions now. Her own eyes welled with tears as she brought her lips inward, sniffing.

"Can we try it again?" Alex questioned as the waitress approached the table, looking at the two crying women oddly. Alex and Olivia simply kept their eyes on each other. The waitress left the food on the table and the two women to their discussion.

Slowly, Olivia nodded and then smiled. The anxiety that was there for five years was starting to clear, letting Olivia begin to feel the hope of a love that had been there all along.

Alex pressed her pelvis into Olivia's backside as Olivia struggled to get the key in the lock. Alex's lips found Olivia's weak spot on her neck as her hands snaked around and began unbuttoning her jeans as Olivia slipped the key into the lock and turned it. Alex followed Olivia inside, her fingers hooked in Olivia's belt loops as she closed the door. Olivia turned abruptly and pushed Alex against the back of the closed door, claiming her mouth in a hot, tongue-dueling kiss. Alex's knees went to jelly as Olivia's hands slipped underneath the soft, black sweater and began lightly tracing her sides and then further up, trailing her fingertips around Alex's nipples before clutching both breasts firmly in her grasp. Olivia's mouth was hot, fiery against her own, her tongue felt like silk against her lips.

"Ah, Alex…I've missed you…" Olivia breathed.

Alex twirled Olivia around and reversed the roles. She grabbed Olivia's wrists and pinned them above her head with one hand as she began unbuttoning her silk blouse with the other. Olivia's chest rose and fell with deep heavy breaths, her eyes darkened with lust as she watched Alex intently. Once Alex had Olivia's shirt unbuttoned, she stopped, "Not here…"

Olivia grabbed Alex's hand and walked quickly towards the bedroom, both ladies hopping while boots were hastily discarded, both women practically jogging to get into the bedroom. Once next to the bed, they stood in front of each other. Alex continued where she left off and slipped the silky blouse off of Olivia's shoulders and then proceeded to kiss her shoulders, collarbone, neck and cleavage, leaning over as she changed spots. Alex stood up, her eyes not once leaving Olivia's as she reached around the brunette and unclasped her bra, letting it fall to the ground. Alex's eyes dipped down to the two globes of perfection in front of her, nipples at hard peaks, awaiting Alex's warm, greedy mouth. Alex leaned over and took a breast into her hand, then gently began licking a trail around Olivia's nipple before wrapping her mouth around it and gently tugging with her teeth. Alex felt Olivia shudder underneath her, moaning her name. Alex switched to the left breast and gave her the same pleasure, causing Olivia to shudder once again and moan, "Alex…I need you."

A surge of wetness made its way into Olivia's white silk underwear as Alex's skilled mouth pleasured her breasts. Olivia thought she might cum right then and there. She was that close. She wanted Alex's body on hers more than anything at that moment. To feel the blonde's soft, warm skin against her own was what she wanted then and there.

"I need your clothes off, now…no more foreplay," Olivia demanded while removing the last of her own clothing, her panties.

Olivia then helped Alex. As Alex began raising her sweater over her head and unclasping her bra, Olivia was on her knees, pulling Alex's black lace panties down to her ankles. She stepped out of them and Olivia stood back up. Before Olivia knew what was happening, she found herself pushed backward onto the bed, Alex lying on top of her. Olivia cupped Alex's face with one hand and cupped her right ass cheek with the other. Alex's mouth crashed down on Olivia's, probing, nipping, sucking, teasing, reminding Olivia of how skilled Alex's mouth really was.

Alex stopped kissing briefly to utter, "This is all you, Liv. I want to show you how much I love you—how much I've missed you, and how I will love you forever…" Alex began kissing her way down Olivia's body, Olivia arching her back in pleasure, gripping the sheets on either side, relishing in the goose bumps on her exposed skin and enjoying the tingly heat radiating from her core as more wetness soaked her folds.

"Alex…I want to feel you…baby, make me cum…" Olivia's voice was filled with need., a turn on for Alex, no doubt, because Alex moaned into Olivia's toned lower stomach as she made her way down to what Olivia was waiting for. Olivia trembled beneath Alex, ready for some contact in the place she wanted it the most.

Olivia whimpered, "Please, Alex," just as Alex's lips found Olivia's wetness, taking in a long draw of suction, causing Olivia to squirm and writhe underneath her. Alex's tongue began at the bottom of her opening and ran it up the length, Olivia gasping as the suction was just as intense. Circling her clit with a skilled tongue, Alex continued her ministrations as Olivia lifted her ass off of the bed to meet Alex's mouth, whimpering with need. "I'm almost there, Al…Just…" Alex wrapped her full lips around the swollen bud and gently sucked as Olivia came undone beneath her, riding out her climax as Alex continued to use her tongue with expertise.

Panting, Olivia, lowered her bottom back down on the bed, her chest heaving. Alex climbed up toward Olivia and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close. She placed a gentle kiss on her temple as Olivia continued to recover, her eyes closed.

"Jesus, Alex…You still get me…"

Alex kissed her, this time on the lips, Olivia tasting herself, and said, "And I will continue to get you for the rest of your life…if you'll let me…"

Olivia looked at Alex intently and then sat up on the edge of the bed. Grabbing her robe from the end of the bed, she stood and began walking and placing it on, leaving the bedroom and an open-mouthed Alex Cabot.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Note: Some of you were wondering why I ended Chapter 2 as I did. It needed a twist to continue. Sure, they could live happily ever after but with the given situation (Olivia's distrust, Alex's absence) it wasn't plausible. **_

_**I am very much for happy endings so…just hang on!**_

_**Please review and let me know your thoughts!**_

3

Alex scrambled from the bed, and walked to the threshold of the bedroom. Per chance, she looked behind the bedroom door—the place where her own robe used to be.

_It was still there. _

Alex's eyes began to burn and her lower lip trembled as she was flooded with adoration. She slipped the silken lavender robe through her arms as she attempted to find some semblance of emotional control. Olivia had kept her robe for five years, in the same place, ready for her return. She had frozen their relationship in time. Surely, if Olivia hated her she would have gotten rid of all evidence of the her. Olivia had kept the robe exactly where it had been the last time they were together.

_So, why had she just left so abruptly?_

Alex tied the robe loosely as she walked down the short hallway and into the living area.

_No Liv._

She looked to the kitchen table and found Olivia sitting quite calmly, leaning back in a wooden chair, one arm across her belly, the other fisted underneath her nose. She was looking straight at Alex, a determined look in her eyes.

"Liv?" Alex began, slowly pulling out the chair next to the startlingly calm woman. She sat cautiously next to her. "What happened? What did I do?"

Olivia looked at Alex. She didn't mean to keep her waiting for a response but, the truth was, Olivia didn't know what to say. Alex had promised her forever once before. Alex had promised the happiness that they had would be there until they grew old. Up until a year ago, Olivia had been in mourning, burying herself in work, hardly ever coming home unless it was to shower or grab clean clothes. She had considered her apartment more of a POD/YMCA than a living space. The sacred area that had become a refuge for both Alex and herself had grown desolate, vacant, cold and meaningless.

Over the past year, she had begun to lift herself out of her dejected fog, and had begun to take more time for herself, to find herself once again. She had begun dating a few people here and there with not much prospect, but at least she was putting herself out there and making an attempt at love and being loved.

Olivia finally opened her mouth to speak, her mouth opening and closing like a baby bird, but the right words were not coming. She looked down at the wood grain of the table and laughed lightly, shaking her head. Finally, she looked up and into Alex's deep blue, concerned eyes. "It was perfect before…"

Alex nodded slowly, waiting patiently for Olivia to finish her thoughts.

"It was wonderful before…we were best friends, lovers, colleagues, and it all worked. I was so happy, Alex." Olivia leaned forward and put her elbows on the table. "But it was ripped away…so suddenly." Olivia made an attempt to look toward the ceiling so her tears would not leave her eyes, but it was pointless; they began falling nonetheless. She looked back at Alex, who was now moving to kneel in front of Olivia, taking the detective's hands and holding them in her lap.

"Liv, I know, Baby. It _was_ wonderful. When they told me that I had to leave my life as I knew it, I died inside. Then, I didn't even get the chance to talk to you about, it all happened so fast. I was shot, they took me, told me about the identity change. I wasn't even allowed to go back to my apartment. Everything they gave me was new—my name, my clothing, my life story.

"When I got out of that car that night and you were standing there, so shocked that I was alive, I wanted to run to you and hold you in my arms, tell you it was all a ploy. But I couldn't. I couldn't be me any more. It was as though I was already a different person. I was so scared at that moment, everything was new, changing, happening so quickly. But I saw your face…" Alex cupped Olivia's face, "…your beautiful face, crying, it was the hardest moment of my life."

Olivia's tears came fast now, her nose running profusely. Alex stood quickly to retrieve the Kleenex box from the coffee table and then returned, kneeling once again. Olivia took a few and wiped her nose.

Alex continued, "I wanted to tell you that I loved you, and that I would be back, not to forget me—but I couldn't." Alex smiled, "As it was…you weren't comfortable with public displays at that time, anyway, as I remember." She smirked and brushed a lock of Olivia's hair behind her ear. "So, they whisked me away and I was told not to contact anyone from my old life for any reason or else our lives could be in jeopardy. Last thing I wanted was to risk the lives of the people I love."

Olivia took in a shaky breath. She placed her palms on either side of Alex's face, cupping it. "But why didn't you call me when you got back? That's three years we could have resumed our relationship. Three years I was horrible to be around, depressed, angry—I was a real bitch." Olivia couldn't help but smile. She leaned forward and touched lips with Alex, softness meeting softness, _really_ breathing in her scent for the first time in years. The sweet scent of her lips and face, the light scent of shampoo in her hair, a hint of the perfume Olivia loved so much, the warm breath from her nose. Olivia's eyes rolled back as the kiss deepened, Alex's tongue pushing into her eager mouth. Olivia moaned as the kiss ended, her eyes still closed.

The women pressed their foreheads to each other's, savoring the closeness.

Alex whispered, "I was afraid you wouldn't want the changed me." She pulled back, gazing into Olivia's eyes. "The more time that went by after my return, the harder it became to contact you. I began to tell myself that that was the past and that you were better off without me. So I didn't return your calls, I didn't try, at all. I hardly got out of bed that first year back. I struggled with who I was, who I had become—I didn't know who I was and didn't want to burden you with my inner conflicts."

Olivia felt a rush of warmth as Alex began slowly caressing the tops of her thighs gently. She grabbed Alex's face once again, this time the kiss was heated, desperate.

Olivia slid from the chair and joined Alex in a kneeling position on the floor, facing her. Olivia reached out and moved a long lock from Alex's face to behind her ear before lightly touching her shoulder, relishing the feel of silk beneath her fingers. She slowly pushed the fabric away, revealing a milky white shoulder that she couldn't resist sinking her teeth into. Olivia leaned forward to taste her.

Alex moaned and tilted her head to the side, grabbing Olivia's backside with both hands as the women's bodies became one. A flood of wetness made its way between Olivia's thighs at the sudden agression. Quickly, hands were in silky hair, mouths seeking flesh, fingers roaming and Olivia and Alex's breathing came in quick pants.

Alex grabbed Olivia by the waist, "Lay back, baby."

Olivia let Alex guide her down to the floor, their eyes not leaving each other. Alex untied Olivia's robe and slowly parted her lapels. Olivia's core was on fire and she could feel herself growing wetter as Alex knelt in between her now-parted legs. Olivia let out a shaky breath, then closed her eyes and moaned as Alex began tracing two fingers in between Olivia's breasts, down her ribcage, and across her taut belly. Olivia shivered from desire as Alex spread her legs wider.

"I love you, Liv. Always have and always will…I never want to be away from you again." Alex placed her body on top of Olivia's, her face at breast level as she began licking and suckling Olivia's swollen breasts. Olivia's pleasure was building once again, just from having Alex touching her sensitive nipples. As Alex continued pleasuring her breasts with her mouth, she slipped her hand down to Olivia's sex, cupping it gently and gliding a finger along her wet slit.

"Jesus, Liv…you're soaked."

The only sound Olivia could make was a cross between a deep "uh" and an "ah"…as Alex slowly slipped her index finger into Olivia's warmth. Olivia needed something to grab onto, so she braced herself on Alex's biceps as Alex added her middle finger, as well. "Oh, Alex…" she breathed, as Alex began a slow rhythm of pumping.

Olivia's lower lips were swollen with arousal, her warmth wetter than Alex could ever remember as the gorgeous detective's breathing began coming in desperate bursts. Alex, enjoying the view of her detective teetering on the edge of climax, smiled as she continued thrusting, adding a third finger and leaving her mark on Olivia's exposed neck.

Olivia was a sight. Head thrown back so far that Alex could barely see her face, back arched, hips straining for more contact as Alex continued pumping. Alex could feel the detectives walls begin tightening, clamping around her fingers. Alex continued her movements and added her thumb into the mix, gently brushing Olivia's clit in a circular motion.

Within seconds, Alex heard…"Uh…uh…uh…I'm gonna cum, baby…"

As Olivia's body bucked with pleasure and Alex helped her ride out the intense waves of her orgasm as she gently placed kisses on Olivia's breasts, chest, neck, and lips. Alex placed her face in the crook of Olivia's neck as both of their bodies came down, their breathing evening out. Alex wrapped her arm around Olivia's midsection and smiled.

Alex couldn't help but feel that this was the beginning of what they had before. It would take time but they were headed in that direction. Alex was sure of it.

Olivia awoke, finding Alex in her arms. She pressed her lips to Alex's forehead. A contented relaxation surrounded her—every part of her body was at peace, a warmth radiating from her core. She felt good. No, she felt amazing. Alex stirred in her arms and she sleepily looked up into Olivia's eyes.

"Hey there," Alex smiled., kissing Olivia's mouth tenderly.

Once the kiss was broken, Olivia questioned, "How long have we been on the floor? Did I sleep?"

Alex laughed lightly, "Yeah, you dozed off right after…I didn't want to wake you because you were actually snoring." Alex sat up and reached up to the kitchen table for her cell phone, leaving Olivia still lying on the floor. "It's just about 3:30 right now." Alex put her cell phone back on the table and propped herself on her elbow, watching Olivia awaken from her short nap.

Olivia pulled herself to a sitting position, pulling her robe together and loosely tying the belt. With Alex gazing at her the way she was, blue eyes darkened, pupils dilated, lips moist and parted, Olivia began to feel a tingling once again between her legs, the undeniable pull of arousal. But Alex hadn't been satisfied yet. She had been a patient lover and had wanted to please Liv and show her how important she was to her, how valued she was, how much she missed her.

Now, it was Olivia's turn to do the pleasing.

Smirking slightly, Olivia reached for Alex's cheek and caressed it with her thumb before leaning in and letting her hot breath linger on her mouth, "Why don't we…" she kissed, "…take a shower," (kiss) "get ready," (kiss) "and then go out somewhere?" She gazed at the attorney, her fingertips traveling across Alex's collarbone. "The park, a movie, the farmer's market? Anywhere. But first," she stood with ease and held out her hand for Alex to grab and helped the counselor up.

Once Alex was standing, Olivia slowly untied Alex's robe and opened it, revealing two pert, milky breasts. Not too big, not too small. Olivia ran her fingertips along the sides, underneath, and brushed lightly over her pebbled nipples, eliciting a deep moan from Alex. "I want to take a shower with you…" Her voice trailed off as her mouth became occupied with Alex's own.

Olivia's fingers found Alex's entrance and she was pleased to feel how wet she was. Alex shuddered and moaned into Olivia's mouth as Olivia continued to delicately explore her entrance, teasing the attorney with a promise of satisfaction.

Olivia pulled away and took Alex's hand, leading her down the hallway to the bedroom. She was going to repay Alex for making her feel alive again, making her feel _at all_ again.

This time, it felt different to Olivia.

Hopefully, this time, she and Alex would be forever.

Alex's head hit the tiled wall behind her as Olivia positioned herself in between the attorney's creamy, toned thighs. "Olivia, please…" she begged, lightly pulling Olivia's wet hair as the detective began darting her skilled tongue in and out of Alex's core. She felt a flow of wetness as Olivia grabbed Alex's ass with both hands, gripping firmly while on her knees, her tongue never once stopping. Olivia's mouth felt incredible.

Alex had never felt like this before with any other person, man or woman. Once she had met Olivia at work, it had been strictly platonic for the first year. Then, gradually, the attraction from both sides grew. A drink after work turned into long dinners, long dinners turned into hot foreplay in the elevator, and then soon they had become intimate. Physically, Olivia made Alex's body do things she had never experienced. There were spots, Olivia discovered, that would make Alex cum just by Olivia gazing at them. Olivia had pleasured her body so deeply that all other lovers had been the proverbial stepping stones to what she would experience sexually with Olivia Benson.

Alex knew that Olivia was where other partners ended for her. They had been experimental with toys and restraints, lotions and potions, keys and cuffs—and Alex had never felt so sexually gratified in her life. But what Alex really preferred was the realness of Olivia. The simple love and act of touching, kissing, feeling, smelling that drove Alex to immediate arousal. The other stuff was nice every once and a while but Olivia could turn Alex on just from flashing her trademark smirk and smile.

They had each had their share of partners of both sexes but once the women had found each other, each knew it was right. It was something that couldn't be replaced or duplicated.

Olivia worked her tongue in as deeply as she could go, working upward and flicking and sucking Alex's tight bundle of nerves on every sweep upward. Alex felt her breath come in short pants as her body threatened to explode. "Liv…ah…ah…I…." Her body convulsed against Olivia's mouth and she looked down to find Olivia grinning, her mouth still enveloping Alex's core. Alex felt her warm juices flowing out of her as Olivia slowly continued her movements, lightly licking and sucking Alex clean and until Alex's body un-tensed.

Olivia slowly stood, enveloping Alex in her arms, both women's faces buried in each other's necks, rocking gently.

Alex finally spoke first, "This is how I remember it…" Alex's husky voice shook, "I was wrong…" She couldn't stop her body from shaking with emotion.

Olivia pulled away, lightly touching Alex's face, "What, Baby? Wrong about what?"

Alex sighed, an unsteady release of relief, "I was wrong about things being different and changing. You are the same person who I have always loved, I never doubted that. But me, I realize that I am also still the same person who has always loved you unconditionally, whole-heartedly, and unequivocally—" She stopped herself at her attorney-like rambling as she saw Olivia smiling at her tenderly. "I should never have doubted that this was real." She brought her lips to Olivia's and kissed her gently, running her tongue along Olivia's lower lip.

Olivia began to speak, after pulling away. "I love you, Alex. Always have…"

Alex looked down at Olivia's tanned, bulbous breasts, so sexy and tempting in front of her.

Olivia used her index finger to lift Alex's chin, making the blonde look her in the eyes. "Now, now, counselor…plenty of time for that…later. Let's get dressed and go out. Greet the evening with my beautiful girlfriend."

For the first time, in five years, Alex felt a weight lifted, she could breathe clearer, freer. She placed her hand on Olivia's firm hip, "I'd like nothing better, detective, than to spend all day, every day with you…"


	4. Chapter 4

_**Author's Note: I did research on Central Park and the area around it. It was fun and I learned a lot about the layout. Scaletta's is an actual Italian restaurant located one block from Central Park.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

4

Olivia and Alex quickly fell back into their old routine as they spent the afternoon exploring the city. First, they went to Central Park and walked around, talking and laughing as if five years had not gone by. Olivia brought a plastic bag full of bread for the ducks. It was a loaf of very stale Ezekiel™ bread that had been in the back of her refrigerator long enough to be covered in a bluish mold on one end.

Alex had insisted that not only do ducks _not_ like healthy sprouted grain bread, but they probably are also against mold, as well. The ducks gathered around the women, eagerly waiting for the chunks of bread to be distributed. Olivia looked so cute standing there breaking off bread in those same curve-hugging jeans from earlier. She looked like a kid, opening a present on Christmas day. Alex held her breath, trying not to laugh at what she anticipated was about to happen.

Olivia finished dropping all of the bread onto the ground in pieces. Once the ducks sniffed it, or whatever they did to bread, the crew of them turned and walked away, quacking their displeasure.

Olivia's jaw dropped as she witnessed the rejection. "No way..."

Alex came up behind Olivia and wrapped her arms around her stomach, her mouth close to her ear, "Those are some smart ducks."

"Those are some snobby ducks," Olivia retorted, smiling.

Alex took Olivia's ear lobe into her mouth and bit lightly, sucking it softly.

Hearing Olivia moan, she began kissing her way down the brunette's jaw line, ending at the pulse point in her neck and biting down lightly. Alex heard a tiny gasp and felt Olivia squeeze Alex's hands on her firm belly. Olivia slowly turned around and brought her hands up to Alex's face, moving some bangs from her eyes and inspecting her lovingly.

Alex began, "You know…five years ago, you never would have expressed yourself like this in public."

Olivia rose up slightly and kissed Alex lightly, letting her lips linger long enough to have a few people walking in the park stare. When the detective pulled away, she whispered, "Five years ago, I didn't know how much you being in my life mattered. Five years ago I thought nothing could stop us, we were invincible. I thought nothing would change."

"And now…?" Alex questioned, sliding her hands from the brunette's back, down to her firm waist.

"Now, I see that things can and _do_ change and you have to live life fully, every day without fear that it will end. Be joyous all the time and love the ones you're with every moment." Olivia smiled and then took the ADA's hand.

They continued to walk, hand-in-hand, talking, laughing, enjoying each other's company until the sun began setting. With the women's arms wrapped around each other's waists, Alex felt Olivia shiver. With only in their clothing from brunch earlier on, Alex stated, "You're cold…"

Olivia snuggled closer as they continued walking, making their way to the sidewalk of Central Park West and West 77th street, where they stopped, Alex wrapping Olivia in her arms. "How about we have dinner at Scaletta's? We can catch a cab back to my place, you can wear one of my dresses…?" Alex grinned, feeling Olivia hold her tighter. "Some wine, some pasta…"

Olivia mumbled into Alex's shoulder, "Sounds perfect."

Olivia breathed in Alex's scent as they held each other. She didn't want to let her go. She had meant what she said about savoring every moment. She had learned that things can change in an instant and to make sure you love who and what is important, no matter what.

It was 7:30 by the time the women walked into Scaletta's, looking crisp, fresh, and rosy-cheeked after a brisk couple of hours in Central Park. The woman looked on-point with their couture, as well. Alex had chosen a simple, off-white, long-sleeved, knee-length dress that hugged her slender hips and pert breasts beautifully, a pearl comb holding her hair in a twist. After much coaxing, Olivia donned a red dress with cap sleeves and just as form fitting as Alex's, her hair remaining down. When Alex saw her in it at her apartment, she was speechless. Olivia knew this was the dress she wanted to wear.

After they checked their coats, the women were seated. Olivia excused herself to go to the ladies room. "I'll only be a moment," she grinned, dragging her fingers along Alex's shoulder's as she walked by.

Witnessing Alex close her eyes from her touch, Olivia smiled as she headed to the back of the restaurant.

After Olivia exited the stall and began washing her hands, she heard another woman come out from another stall. Olivia began touching up her hair. She opened her clutch to find her lipstick.

"Olivia?" a voice questioned from the farthest sink.

Olivia looked to her left at the woman addressing her. It took a moment to register but after it did, her heart sank into her heels. She suddenly felt ill—heart racing and nauseous. "Kim?" The former ADA looked incredible. Her golden hair down and luxuriously sexy, and the black, thin-strapped knee-length dress she wore hugged and flattered her feminine figure beautifully. Olivia almost didn't recognize her without the French twist and skin-tight suit—although, unfortunately, she would have recognized her wearing much less. She had obviously been out on a date to a Broadway show or something of the like.

Kim approached Olivia and smiled, opening her arms as Olivia hesitantly stepped into the embrace. Pulling away and looking Olivia over appreciatively, the attorney beamed, "You look incredible," her eyes roaming Olivia's body without apology.

"You look pretty good, yourself," Olivia stated truthfully.

ADA Greylek was silent for a few seconds, watching as Olivia began gliding a burnt umber-colored lipstick over her full lips. "How long has it been, Liv?"

Olivia floundered, "Uh, it's been a while, Kim." Olivia capped her lipstick and placed it back in her purse.

"About a year, huh?" Greylek questioned, her gaze burning into Olivia.

Olivia felt cornered as Greylek mentally closed her in. The only way to get out would be to either a) finish the conversation, or b) rush past her and create a scene in the restaurant. Olivia chose the former.

An elderly woman came in and entered a stall, locking it behind her.

The former ADA continued, standing entirely too close for comfort from Olivia, "Two nights of great sex, Liv, and then…nothing…Where'd you go? I thought we had fun…"

Olivia felt queasy, "Kim…I…"

True, the sex was good and hot—frantic and drunk—but good, nonetheless. But it had no meaning. It was purely physical. Olivia had been physically attracted to the sexy ADA the moment she first saw her last year and, being that she had then recently to begun to emerge from her four-year depression, she figured why not? So after a night out with the squad at Trinity Place Bar, Benson and Greylek had been all over each other in the cab back to Kim's place. It was rough, it was horny, and it was awkward as hell, especially Olivia slipping out in the middle of the night. Yet, somehow Olivia managed to do it all over again the following weekend in much the same way. Olivia had scolded herself after that second time and told herself that it couldn't happen again.

Kim had called, texted, and emailed for about a week but Olivia did not respond. At work they were professional and neither mentioned it, and after a while Kim got the point. Soon after that, she had taken another assignment somewhere else, much to Olivia's relief.

Now, with her former two-night-stander burning holes into her eyes, Olivia couldn't think of a word to say. She stood with her clutch under her right arm, hands folded self-consciously in front of her body.

"Don't worry, Olivia…" Kim began, moving to the next sink and washing her hands, "…I got the point. "She pulled a few paper towels from the dispenser and dried her hands. "You were a great lay, though."

The elderly lady came out of the stall and began washing her hands.

Kim walked up to Olivia who continued leaning against the sink with her right hip and arms folded awkwardly in front of her, wishing this to be over soon. Greylek leaned into Olivia's ear, close enough for Olivia to smell her perfume and feel her warm breath blowing the hairs on her neck, "I do miss that amazing tongue, though…" She smiled and turned on her heel, smiling at the elderly woman, who was now drying her hands. "Call me if you ever need a quick fix." Kim winked and exited the restroom.

Olivia stood, letting out the breath she had been holding. The old woman looked at Olivia once more, shook her head and left the ladies room.

Olivia took a few deep breaths, leaning her hands against the sink, willing herself to calm down. Her heart was still racing, her upper lip sweating. She took a few paper towels and blotted her face, fixed her hair and steadied herself to head back into the dining area and join Alex.

Alex looked up as Olivia approached the table and pulled her chair out. Olivia sat down and carefully unfolded her napkin, spreading it across her lap. She had a look on her face that was unreadable. Alex reached over to her hand right before she began to lift her water glass to her mouth. Olivia set the glass back down and smiled.

"Everything OK?" Alex questioned, the concern in her blue eyes intense.

Olivia turned her hand and grasped Alex's in her own, smiling. "Yeah, fine…I just…" Olivia took a deep breath.

"Just what, Baby?"

Olivia looked at Alex. She had a right to know about her sexual encounters over the past year. And it _was_ only the past year because the four before it had been a virtual drought. Absolutely nothing had happened the first four years after Alex's departure. Then, last year, Olivia craved it, needed it, wanted meaningless sex. Pleasure without thinking.

"Olivia…what is it? You've very green…"

The waiter approached the table. "Can I interest either of you in a glass of wine? Perhaps you would like to share a bottle of_**Bricco Tondo, Fontanafredda**_**, a nice red from the Piedmont area of Italy**? Quite delicious." The waiter wiggled his eyebrows at Alex, looking eagerly between the two women.

"What do you think, Baby? Should we get a bottle?" Alex grinned.

Olivia melted at her comfort and giddiness and smiled. "Sure, let's get a bottle…"

"I'll have that right out, ladies." The waiter turned and left them to their previous discussion.

Olivia lifted her glass of water to her lips and took a long swig. Setting the glass down, she began to play with the beads of condensation on the glass with her index finger. "Alex, you were gone for five years…"

Alex nodded, "Yes…five difficult years away from you…"

Olivia took a slow, deliberate breath. "Three of those, you were here, in the city."

Alex leaned back in her chair, awaiting Olivia's difficult divulgence. "That's right…"

"The first two, you were in WitSec, living a different life. And then, we found out that you were out of WitSec and back in Manhattan. I called, emailed, texted …nothing." Olivia looked at Alex. "I don't blame _you_, I need you to understand that. _God,_ I don't blame you, at all." Olivia looked up at the ceiling.

The waiter came back to the table with the usual dog and pony show with the uncorking, and the pouring, the sniffing, swirling, and tasting, testing Alex's approval before pouring both women a glass of red. "Enjoy," he said and walked away once again.

"Blame me for what, Liv?" Alex moved a piece of hair behind her ear.

Alex was apprehensive now. What was Olivia so afraid to tell her?

"Last year, I decided to break out of my catatonic state and start getting out more often. Although I knew you were back, you didn't make any effort to see me. So, part of me figured I'd better move on. I was feeling restless and, truth be told, horny." Olivia took a long swig of wine as she gauged Alex's reaction.

Alex felt like she knew what was coming. Although she, herself, had been celibate the last three years, she hadn't been without sex in WitSec. But she told herself that it was because of the character she had to play, the role she had to perpetuate. Now, she felt that Liv was about to tell her something that she might not want to hear.

Olivia took another cleansing breath before continuing, "I had a couple of partners last year. Partners I'm not proud of and partners that I never had any intention of having long-term relationships with."

Alex nodded slowly, waiting for Olivia to continue. She brought her wine glass to her lips and sipped, her eyes not leaving Olivia.

"Like I said, I craved the interaction, the touch, the sensations—that's all. It was just sex to satisfy a four-year-long itch…" Olivia took another sip of her wine and then cautiously looked up at Alex, who was still watching her.

When Olivia didn't say anything more, Alex finally spoke, "Do you think I expected you to wait for me?"

Olivia watched her, tears forming in her eyes. She shook her head quickly. "I don't think you _expected_ me to wait…but I regret _not _waiting…" Olivia laughed lightly, "…if that makes sense."

Alex reached over and began stroking Olivia's hand. "You didn't know that we would end up together again. You thought I dropped you, forgot about you…Don't blame yourself…you didn't know, Liv."

Olivia couldn't help it. Her body began to shake with relief. Alex had understood, after all. Relief washed over Olivia's entire being as her eyes welled with tears. She cupped Alex's cheek with her hand as her tears began to fall. "How are you so wonderful?" she asked, stroking her soft cheek with her thumb.

"Olivia?" a voice behind her questioned.

Olivia took her hand from Alex's face and turned to face the voice.

_You've got to be shitting me…_Olivia thought. Her face dropped and a new drama began.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note at the end.**

**Spolier Alert, though.**

**Only read it first if you don't want to be surprised.**

5

"It _is_ you, isn't it?" A tall, blonde man with broad shoulders and a five o'clock shadow stood, hands in pockets, a confidence about him, his Armani suit fitting him perfectly. "Detective Benson, still as elegant and gorgeous as ever…"

Olivia almost groaned out loud, not believing the odds. She looked up at him and tried to show her best team player smile although, at this point, all she wanted to do was crawl under the table with the bottle of wine. Olivia looked to Alex and then back to their new visitor, "Alex, this is Dr. Kyle Beresford. He's one of the best doctor's at St. Mark's and at Bellevue." She turned to Alex, "And this is Alexandra Cabot, my girlfriend." Olivia rubbed Alex's arm gently, feeling the effects of her first glass of wine.

Olivia was suddenly rather warm and leaned back to shake her hair from her neck, and taking a deep breath in the process. She could feel the flush in her face and the sweat dotting her forehead and above her upper lip.

Dr. Beresford questioned, "Wow, girlfriend? I didn't…you weren't…we…" He stopped himself, and settled on, "It's wonderful to meet you, Ms. Cabot…" He reached across and shook her hand. "How do you two know each other?" He stood waiting and watching as Olivia continued sweating and mopping her forehead with her white cocktail napkin.

Olivia poured another glass of wine for herself and replenished Alex's near-empty glass. "Alex is the ADA for Special Victim's Unit."

The doctor nodded. "So, we are all sort of connected…"

_In more ways than you can imagine, _Olivia mused.

Alex continued to eye Olivia throughout her obvious discomfiture. She was perspiring, her tanned cheeks were flushed, she was practically stuttering. Alex was feeling frisky and fuzzy from the wine and couldn't help but be ever-so-slightly facetious. "So, Doctor Beresford, how do you and Olivia know each other…outside of work…?" Alex smirked, taking her glass to her lips.

Olivia must have inhaled wrong because she started sputtering a little. Luckily, none came out of her mouth or through her nose. She turned to Alex with a look of defiance on her face.

Alex wanted more information and she was good at getting more information out of people. Putting Olivia up on the proverbial stand, she put on her best attorney face, unwavering, and waited.

"Oh, Olivia and I…" Kyle looked to Olivia as if asking for permission to divulge precious information.

Olivia spoke for him, a definite challenge in her voice. Alex could tell Olivia had grown tired of being uncomfortable and the alcohol was making her a bit more bold and ballsy. "Kyle and I dated last year. We've known each other for a long time and one night, he called me to tell me about a victim's recovery, asked me if I'd like to have dinner with him, we did, we fucked, and dated for about six weeks. Happy?" Olivia smiled sarcastically.

Dr. Beresford looked absolutely stunned. He raised his eyebrows and gawked at Olivia and her boldness.

"Oh, Kyle, don't worry…Alex knows of my…indiscretions, don't you baby?" Olivia placed her hand on Alex's forearm.

Alex shook her head slowly, trying not to smile. _Wow, Liv, way to treat this situation with caution._ Alex loved the boldness of this Liv. The cocky, no holds barred attitude and the mischievous sparkle in her eyes—not to mention the flush that was creeping down her ample cleavage. Alex felt a surge of wetness between her legs causing her to shift in her chair.

Olivia must have noticed because she bit her bottom lip and looked Alex over hungrily.

The waiter approached the table. "Excuse me. Shall I add a third place setting?"

All three spoke in unison, "No!"

The doctor spoke, "I was just heading out but wanted to say "hi" when I saw you." He faced Olivia reaching for her hand, "It was wonderful seeing you again, and…" He shook Alex's hand as well, "Alex, it was wonderful meeting you. You ladies have a good evening." He smiled and walked away.

"Not bad," Alex claimed, ogling Dr. Beresford's backside as he walked away.

"_I _didn't think so…" Olivia dared, eyes fixed only on Alex.

Alex continued to watch Olivia as Olivia watched Alex. There was a distinct determination amongst the two women. Alex noticed Olivia's eyes had become a lighter, more of a chocolate caramel color in the dim lighting of the restaurant. Her glistening skin made her glow. All Alex wanted to do was push the detective's chair back, pull Olivia by the thighs to the edge of her chair, hike her dress—"

"Are you ladies ready to order?" The waiter, still standing there and obviously enjoying the show, stood poised and ready to write.

Alex peeled her eyes from the brunette's long enough to order the _pollo diavolo_. Olivia seemed to have a hard time looking away from the attorney, as well.

"And for you, Miss?"

"I'll have the _rigatoni pomodoro basilica_." She closed her menu and grabbed her wine glass as she stated, "I plan on working the pasta off later this evening." She set her wine glass down and looked directly at Alex, pure, unadulterated lust in her eyes.

The waiter left the table and Alex leaned into Olivia, whispering close to her ear, "You have no idea how wet I am right now."

Olivia's face was priceless—a mixture of awe and arousal. She took a long swig of water and took her cloth napkin and began blotting her cleavage, intentionally moving further into the crevasse between her breasts, causing Alex's gaze to move there.

"Liv…," Alex warned, "…please stop or I won't be able to walk out of here without you covering my backside."

"It's just the beginning, baby. Just the beginning." Olivia winked.

The food was delicious and filling and after the women had settled the check with the waiter, Olivia and Alex sat, enjoying the last bit of wine in their glasses. "Well, that was interesting…" Alex sipped, her eyes hooded from the alcohol and her perpetual state of arousal. The way Olivia watched her as she ate was almost too much. Olivia watched her like that of a lioness as she watches a gazelle, ready to pounce any minute. Alex had become so aroused and her panties had become so soaked that she knew she'd have to put her coat on before they stood to leave.

The waiter brought the credit card tray, two mints, and a pen for Alex to sign. Once they had paid, Alex whispered to Olivia, "Can you bring me my coat?" She smiled as she said it, not embarrassed in the slightest.

A flood of arousal found its way from Olivia's core and she felt her nipples tighten at Alex's request. She knew why, Alex had mentioned her impending dilemma earlier. Olivia stood to retrieve their coats, feeling Alex's eyes on her backside as she ambled away.

When Olivia returned, she held Alex's coat for her to slip into it. "I owe you," Alex whispered as she slipped her arms through the off-white camel hair of the ankle-length coat.

Alex took Olivia's deep purple coat of the same material and helped her into it. The two women grabbed their purses and walked into the chilly evening air.

The women looked at each other and drew close, arms wrapped around each other. Olivia looked into Alex's blue eyes and down to her full, pink mouth. Olivia brought her mouth within millimeters of Alex's and whispered, "Your place is closer…I can't wait to feel you inside me." With that, Olivia turned and began walking to the curb to hail a cab. She turned back and watched as Alex stood there, lips parted, eyes lusting, looking, wandering.

Olivia heard Alex's cell ring and the blonde remained near the restaurant to answer it. "Cabot."

Firm and direct. Olivia loved the way she answered the phone.

As Olivia stood at the curb, waiting for a cab to come by, a voice from the other side of the valet stand on the curb said, "So she's my replacement?"

Not thinking the voice was talking to her, Olivia furrowed her brow but looked to her right nonetheless. _Jesus_. Kim Greylek again. Olivia snapped her head back to look for a taxi, praying one would come quickly.

_I cannot get a break,_ Olivia fumed silently.

"Kim, please…" Olivia pleaded. Olivia looked over her shoulder, back at Alex, who was now in an animated exchange with whomever she was talking to.

"Please what, Olivia? I am not intentionally trying to bother you. Call it a coincidence that we both happened to be here tonight, but I gotta tell you, you don't make it easy for a woman to leave you alone when you're wearing that dress and looking as fuckable as you do." Her eyes pierced into Olivia's.

Olivia raised her hand to hail an oncoming cab.

Greylek continued, "She's beautiful, though. I'll give her that. I just hope she can match your pace in the bedroom."

The cab stopped, Olivia opened the door, and then turned around to motion to Alex that the taxi had arrived. But Alex was already right there behind her. Had she heard everything? Nothing? The attorney's expression was hard to read—stoic, almost. Olivia quickly got inside and Alex slipped in after her, closing the door.

Alex gave the address to the cab driver and he pulled away from the curb. Olivia looked at Alex, trying to read the expression on her beautiful patrician profile.

Olivia felt Alex's hand grab her own off of her lap and the attorney pulled Olivia closer to her body in the back seat of the cab, putting an arm around her, their bodies now pressed. Olivia placed her spinning head on Alex's shoulder as Alex used her free hand and brought Olivia's hand up to her mouth and pressed her lips to it. Olivia felt exhausted after the events of the evening. Greylek, the wine, Beresford, Greylek again…it was all too much for one night. But Olivia wanted to be close to Alex tonight—wanted to feel the warmth of her soft body, taste every inch of her skin, and be with her completely. There had been so many distractions this evening and she didn't want there to be any more so she decided to come clean, once and for all. Her last confession.

"Alex?" Olivia practically whispered.

"Mistake number two?" Alex questioned.

Olivia lifted her head to look at the blonde. "Wh—How?"

"Well, detective, the signs were all there. The look on her face when she glanced at me on her way out of the ladies room. The look on your face as you exited after she did. The look on your face when you saw her outside, and then of course, there was her comment she made about hoping I can keep up with you in the bedroom. I may not be an NYPD detective, detective, but I have hung around long enough with you and your illustrious squad to read the signs and clues."

Olivia rested her head back against Alex once again and Alex pressed her lips to Olivia's temple. She couldn't believe it. Alex had met both her lovers from the previous year in the course of two hours. Olivia was still in shock.

"Hey," Alex started, turning Olivia's chin to face her with her index finger, "do _you_ think I can?"

Alex's mouth parted and she pressed those soft lips to Olivia's, running her tongue along Olivia's bottom lip and then gliding over teeth, wanting access. Olivia obliged and opened her mouth their tongues in a duel of dominance. When they pulled away, breathless, Olivia's eyes remained closed, "Can what?"

Alex kissed Olivia's closed eyes and then her nose, "Match your pace…"

Olivia smiled, "Who do you think taught me that pace?"

**Author's Note: I have always thought that Dr. Kyle Beresford Olivia should hook up, just a little fling. He reminds me of Bo Duke of the Dukes of Hazzard (but is much better looking, in my opinion). I always thought that, being a successful doctor, good-looking, intelligent, and the fact that both he and Olivia work to help people, that they should be more flirtatious or that there should be a small amount of sexual tension with the characters. He's got a certain sexiness and, surprisingly, and according to his biography, is only one year younger than the beautiful and sexy Mariska. At first I thought writing him in would be very cougar-esque, but reading about him I found that I was wrong. **


	6. Chapter 6

_**Author's Note: This is the most erotic chapter yet. Take heed and caution and all of that!**_

_**Remember: Please, please, please send me a note or review with your thoughts. Alex and Olivia will soon get back to work on another case, life will try to o back to normal as they know it…**_

6

With Olivia's warm hand cupping Alex's sex in the taxi, the brunette's mouth suctioning and lightly tonguing her neck, the attorney wasn't sure she could wait until they ascended the steps required to make it into her upper west side penthouse. The words public lewdness came to mind but, with their given occupations and what they knew about consequences, she abstained. By the time they pulled up to Alex's, they had already given the cabbie quite a show already. Some things were meant for privacy.

Olivia was the first out of the car, but not before handing the cab driver a twenty and then exiting on the side of traffic. Alex smirked as she casually got out on the opposite side, an impatient Olivia already waiting at the bottom of the steps. Alex decided to make Olivia crazy with desire, making her wait until she couldn't take it anymore.

"Someone's eager," Alex calmly stated as she opened her clutch to fish out her keys.

Olivia walked up to Alex and grabbed the belt of her coat, pulling her body to slam into Olivia's. Alex let out an, "Umph," and then smiled. "Patience, beautiful…"

"Right now…I have none," Olivia took the keys from Alex's hand and began leading the way, disrobing one arm of her coat in the process.

Alex followed as the detective opened the door, the brunette removing her coat fully and hastily putting it on the coat rack next to the door. Olivia turned Alex around, almost forcefully, and pulled her coat off of her body, adding it to the coat rack as well. Olivia put her hands on Alex's hips and began walking her backwards towards the sofa. Once Olivia had her with the back of her knees hitting the sofa, she gently shoved Alex to sit, eyeing the attorney with lust as she unzipped her own dress in the back and let it fall forward and then slide down, revealing Olivia's beautiful figure. The pale pink of her matching set against her golden skin only accentuated the femininity of her voluptuous frame.

Alex went to reach forward but Olivia stopped her, pushing her backwards and setting her hands to her sides on the sofa. Olivia kicked her dress aside and knelt in front of Alex, nudging her knees open with her hands. Olivia pushed Alex's dress upward and spread her legs wider. She reached underneath Alex's thighs and pulled her forward with ease, positioning her closer to the edge. The detective looked perfect—those tanned bulbous breasts, that toned stomach, those strong thighs. Alex's eyes moved to her panties which were transparent, revealing a neat, simple shaven strip of hair. Alex licked her lips, feeling her chest and face flush, her breathing quicken, and her sex ooze as her lower lips twitched in anticipation. So far, her plan was crashing and burning. She wanted Olivia now. Fuck waiting.

The blonde's plan had been to grab Olivia and switch positions, since the brunette was almost naked now anyway, but all thought left her mind as she felt a warm, proficient finger push her beige lace panties aside and enter her. Alex gasped and watched Olivia, who was also attentively watching her.

"Speaking of eager," Olivia mocked.

Olivia continued to tease, stroking her folds and pushing in one, then two fingers inside, over and over with just a slight bit more pressure every time.

When she added a third finger, Alex raised her hips off of the edge, leaning further back, her head against the cushions, wanting to be closer to Olivia, wanting her to go deeper. Alex's breath was coming in pants now, moving her ass with the rhythm of her girlfriend's powerful motions. Olivia turned her fingers, curling them inside, and began stroking Alex's spongy muscle, hitting her g-spot perfectly as the detective simultaneously pressed her lips to the hard bundle of nerves that had poked its way into vision. Alex gasped and grabbed Olivia's hair, running her fingers through her soft locks as the brunette began to work her clit, flicking her tongue firmly across it in a constant motion.

"God, you remember me perfectly," Alex panted.

Within a matter of seconds, Alex felt her inner walls clench and tighten, reaching the high, calm peak just before the euphoria kicked in and came crashing down, sending her body into spasms of ecstasy and crying out, "Liv! Oh, God…Olivia!"

As she rode out the waves of a massive orgasm, Olivia continued her movements until Alex's body stilled. The brunette leaned forward and placed gentle kisses on Alex's firm belly before resting her chin on Alex's upper thigh, smiling smugly, and waiting for the attorney to recover.

Alex lifted her head slightly from the back of the sofa and then laid it back down. Alex grinned, "What are you smiling about, detective?"

"You always try to be so in control, counselor. But I like this side of you without control." Olivia, still on her knees, sat up straight, and leaned forward over Alex. "Now…," she began, tugging the shoulders of the dress downward and pulling it off of the blonde's shoulders, "…this needs to come off." Olivia continued until the dress was off of Alex's arms and at her waist. Olivia placed her hands gently underneath Alex's elbows and lifted slightly upward, silently signaling her to stand up.

The women stood up together and Alex stepped out of her dress. Olivia still had her four-inch heels on and looked magnificent in just lingerie and heels. Alex's heels had fallen off moments ago, as she hit her climax.

Watching Olivia trace her fingers lightly over her own nipples and breasts, and reaching down to feel her own warmth set Alex over the edge, once again. Her core began to pulsate for a second time, her wetness coming in another phase of arousal.

Olivia leaned into Alex, wrapping her arms around her, and went in for a hot, wet, hungry kiss. Feeling Olivia's breasts rubbing against her own, the roughness of the lace in between, caused Alex to moan into Olivia's mouth. Alex's hands traveled to Olivia's firm backside and squeezed firmly.

Olivia had been turned on, hot, and ready since the restaurant. She had thought she wanted to be pleasured first but, when she saw the attorney acting so nonchalant and blasé about Olivia's imminent arousal, it made her determined to make Alex get off first. But now, after pleasing her girlfriend and her reacting so strongly, her climax so intense, Olivia's own arousal had built to the point that she was almost in pain. Her skin was on fire, every touch was like a burning match. She was literally dripping with excitement.

Alex whispered against her mouth, their foreheads touching, "How about you meet me in the bedroom? I have to lock up and then go to the restroom. But I won't be long. There are some grapes in the fridge if you're hungry."

Olivia was dying right now. "I don't want any grapes, Alex…" She kissed the attorney again, purposely taking the blonde's hand and guiding it to her wetness, letting Alex feel how ready she was to be satiated.

"Jesus, Liv…ahhh," she moaned into Olivia's mouth. "I promise…five minutes…" Alex turned towards the front door and Olivia moved into the kitchen to the refrigerator to get a couple of bottles of water to put on the bedside table. Olivia knew this would be a thirst-building session, and she wanted to be prepared.

While there, she grabbed a small bunch of the aforementioned red grapes from a bowl on the top shelf. She took the bottles and the fruit and noticed Alex's absence and knew she must already be in the bathroom. She began walking down the hallway and entered the bedroom.

She felt so at-home here. Like they had been together all these years, had just had a night out, and now were going to make love and fall asleep. So perfect.

Olivia put the bottles on the table and held the bunch of grapes by the stem in her teeth as she kicked her shoes off, slipped her panties off and unhooked her bra, removed it, and then let it fall to the floor. She climbed onto the bed and lay back in the middle of all the pillows, legs bent at the knees, knees together, popping grapes into her mouth. She placed the stem on the table and turned her head, taking in the scent of Alex on the pillows—floral and herbal and incredibly sexy—and then reached down to her soaked womanhood.

Alex exited the bathroom, absolutely unclothed; her lithe body hadn't changed in five years. Her milky skin was untouched by the sun, those perfect porcelain spheres, her nipples high and at attention, her toned, lean legs, and those silky cropped curls leading to the entrance to her sex. She had taken her glasses off and let her hair down from the twist it had been in and let it fall around her shoulders, stopping just shy of her nipples. She began walking toward Olivia, who began swaying her closed knees left and right and smiling at her lover.

"Anything else you need to tend to, counselor?" Olivia asked huskily, her need audible.

Alex shook her head slowly, as she prowled toward the foot of the bed, and proceeded to slither up toward Olivia, positioning her body above hers, hovering, but not quite touching just yet. "There's only one more _thing_ I need to tend to detective."

Alex slowly brought her pelvis down and rested it against Olivia's and then slid her firm thigh into Olivia's wetness, eliciting a gasp and a guttural moan from the brunette. Olivia's body was responding immediately and she thought she would come right then and there. Her lower lips were so swollen and ready to be stimulated that she couldn't concentrate on anything but the burning euphoria in her groin.

Alex attacked Olivia's breasts first, knowing that the attorney had always been partial to that area of her body. Olivia's body bucked up, her back arching from the pleasure that shot from her nipples straight to her core. A flood of wetness was expelled as the attorney continued gratifying her breasts, taking turns licking, sucking, kissing and teasing.

"Alex, baby…please…" Olivia huffed in between ragged pants. Alex moved her thigh into Olivia again and this time, Olivia took matters into her own hands. She raised her bottom off the bed, meeting Alex with every thrust of her thigh. Olivia grabbed Alex's arms as they both continued thrusting. Olivia's orgasm was close but she knew it wouldn't be the only one as turned on as she had been for the past hour or so. She released with a loud, wailing, "Uhhhhhhhhhh," her face contorting in pleasure as she climaxed, but could feel the building of a sequel.

Alex sensed this and proceeded to slide her body down, positioning her face in between the detective's thighs.

Olivia looked down, still panting—panting from immense arousal and panting from an impending second release. "It's not gonna take much," Olivia husked.

Olivia saw Alex grin and then take her mouth straight to her sensitive bundle of nerves, teasing with flicks before settling in on a languid motion of licking up her slit, probing and then flicking. Licking, probing, flicking.

Panting raggedly, her eyes closed, head thrown back, Olivia could no longer control her breathing or the sounds that were coming from her mouth. She didn't know she could make sounds like that—deep, unrecognizable moaning coming louder, and louder still—a cross between pleasure and torture.

Alex shifted to the side of Olivia and climbed to the left briefly. Olivia opened her eyes and breathed, "What the fuck…?" She continued panting, and closed her eyes again, waiting, trusting that Alex in whatever she had planned. Soon Alex was back in between her legs. Olivia felt something different now at her entrance. It was cold yet smooth and firm. Once Olivia realized what it was, she thrust forward, signaling for Alex to fill her completely.

Alex loved the way Olivia's body was responding. It was even more intense than it had been five years prior when they were just getting to know each other sexually. It was as if time had been good to both women, made them comfortable in their bodies—a chance to learn what gets them off.

Alex moved further up on Olivia, continuing to drive the dildo into her further and further after each retraction. Soon, the phallus was buried to the hilt and Olivia was close, her body trembling beneath Alex's. Olivia opened her eyes, wide with shock as she screamed—no _shrieked_, "Uuuhhh, shhhhhhitttt, ooohhhh…fuck!"

Olivia grabbed Alex and held on with all the strength she had, wrapping her legs and arms around her. She squeezed Alex so hard Alex thought she heard a rib pop. The orgasm ripped through Olivia's body, her spasms extreme, jolting the bed and Alex in the process. It seemed to last minutes. Once the last aftershock made its way through Olivia's being, she lay there, arms and legs limp but still wrapped around Alex. Alex watched Olivia's face as it changed from elation to calmness. She was so beautiful. Alex let go of the plastic appendage and reached up to stroke the detective's soft, tanned cheek gently, running her fingers lightly over Olivia's parted lips, hot breath still escaping in now-light pants.

She could tell Olivia was exhausted—spent as they say. Alex pressed a kiss to Olivia's lips and inhaled her redolence that was pure Olivia—feminine, sexy, and slightly spicy. Alex reached down and pulled the sheet over both of them. She reached to her left and turned the lamp off and then returned to Olivia, putting her arms around the fatigued brunette.

"I'm sorry…" Olivia's slurred voice was barely audible.

"Don't worry, Baby…" Alex kissed her shoulder. "…like you said, we're just getting started."

Alex snuggled her face into the crook of Olivia's neck and the two satiated woman drifted off to sleep—both content, satisfied, and never more in love.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note: This is a pretty tame (sexually) chapter, although I think you'll like the subject matter. As a teacher, I encounter experiences like SVU only **_**very**_** occasionally (Thank God). I can't imagine what it's like to have a full-time career that deals with the horrible parts of teaching like abuse, etc.**

**This chapter is dedicated to all the people who work to help victims of abuse and help find justice. **

**We see Badass Benson in this chapter. Please favorite, follow and review. Your words mean the world to me. **

**Also, I am thinking of ending this at 10 or 11 chapters.**

**Enjoy!**

7

Olivia slowly entered a waking mode and opened one eye as she heard her iPhone's alarming, shrill sound in the distance. The ring tone she recognized was set for when Elliot called and there would be only one reason for him to be calling her at…she lifted her head slightly to peer at the alarm clock to her right…5:13 a.m.

_Mother fuck_, she thought, as she quietly moved the covers off of her and strolled naked into the living room to retrieve her cell phone from her clutch.

Once she opened her purse and took it out, it stopped ringing, going straight to voicemail. She waited a moment for the message to complete. Elliot was going to give her shit about not answering it, knowing that she always had it on her, beside her, or at least within grabbing distance. She chided herself for the irresponsibility of not having it with her. That phone was her communication lifeline and she had completely abandoned it last night in the heat of passion.

Olivia took a deep breath and pressed the green phone icon that would dial Elliot and waited for him to pick up.

No greetings were necessary. Right away, Elliot answered and stated, "Liv, we've got a case. Victim's at Mercy being examined. Her parents are at the hospital, too. I'll meet you there in thirty."

"OK, see you there." Olivia ended the call and began walking back to the bedroom. She hated to do it but she had to wake Alex to borrow some clothing. The clothing from the day before reeked of the outdoors, ducks, and the French fries and hash browns from the diner where they had eaten brunch. She needed fresh clothes.

To be at the hospital in thirty minutes would have been easier from her apartment but, here she was, further away from Mercy and her tight red dress and stilettos from last night weren't going to do for interviewing a victim at the hospital. She had nothing clothing-wise at this apartment at all—no robe, no underwear. Her rekindled relationship with the attorney had only just begun and Olivia was still without the basic creature comforts of home and the basic overnight necessities. She felt momentarily lost and flustered all at once, not to mention slightly panicked at the vulnerability of it all.

She approached Alex's side of the bed cautiously. "Alex…" she whispered.

"Don't worry, Liv. I'm awake. Barely, but I'm awake."

Olivia knelt down next to the bed. "I am so sorry. I have to be at the hospital in thirty minutes. Elliot called and there's a girl—"

Alex sat up and smiled, stopping Olivia by placing her index finger on her mouth and then leaning into her and kissing her gently. "You need some clothes. Let me get you some jeans and a shirt. Ankle boots are in the closet, they'll be slightly big but wearable. Fresh underwear and socks are in the top right drawer of the bureau."

As Alex picked out a pair of jeans and button down navy shirt for the detective, Olivia got the underwear and socks. Then, her mind froze for a moment when she thought of her badge and gun.

_Shit! Had she left them at her apartment? _

Then, relief washed over her as she remembered she had left them in the drawer in the entryway table by the front door for safe keeping when she and Alex had come back after the park to shower and change.

She exhaled a deep breath as she put the panties and socks on, grabbing her bra off of the floor. Alex placed the shirt and jeans on the bed and walked up to Olivia.

"Hey…" she began. "…it's OK. You've got twenty-five minutes to make it there…" Alex placed a quick, soft kiss on Olivia's mouth.

Olivia nodded. She grabbed the jeans and hurriedly put them on, took the shirt and slipped it through her arms and began hastily buttoning it. "Alex, my…"

"I'll get them. You put your shoes on and wash your face." Alex ran her hand over Olivia's messy hair. As Alex left to get Olivia's service items, she called over her shoulder, "The brush is in a basket with ponytail holders on the lid of the toilet."

"Got it," Olivia called. She tucked her shirt in on the way to the sink. The jeans were tight, there was no doubt, but they still fit and she could, thankfully, button them. The shirt, however, was a size small and fit Olivia everywhere except along the breast and shoulder regions. The fabric pulled at the bust, slightly exposing her pink bra but, thankfully, she had her leather coat from earlier to wear over it.

Alex entered with Olivia's duty belt, badge, and gun. She placed the gun and badge on the bed and took the duty belt into her hands. Olivia exited the bathroom, hair brushed and in a ponytail, blotting her face with a pale yellow face towel.

Olivia walked toward Alex and stopped. Alex took the detective's belt and started on Olivia's first loop and continued to snake her way around the brunette's waist. Olivia watched her, arms on Alex's elbows. Olivia could feel the burning sting in her eyes.

Once finished with the loops and buckle, Alex looked up, concern on her face. "What is it, Liv?"

"You're wonderful…," was all she could say. "Thank you." She placed a soft, slow kiss on Alex's left cheek, then right cheek, then lips, letting her wanting to relish the softness briefly. She pulled away resting her forehead against her girlfriend's, "I gotta go…"

"Yeah…I'll see you soon…"

Olivia picked up her badge from the bed and clipped it on her thick, black belt. Then she picked up the gun and began walking down the hallway, simultaneously placing it into her holster. She put her on leather jacket from the coat rack, patting the pocket to make sure her keys were there and then turned to Alex at the door. "I'll call you, OK?"

"OK…" Alex's eyes dipped to Olivia's mouth and one more beloved kiss was had.

Olivia pulled away, smiled and then opened the door and left, off to Mercy Hospital and a new victim to help.

Olivia strode into the Mercy Hospital waiting room of the ER just shy of 5:45 a.m. Elliot was already waiting outside the private examining room, his back to Olivia. She could tell he was deep in thought, rubbing the stubble on his chin as he so often did when thinking. "Hey, El. What've we got?"

He turned and instantly began speaking. "She's in there now. Audrey McAdams, nine years old. She was brought in for pains in her lower belly and vomiting. She was examined and her hymen is not intact and there's vaginal tearing but no semen. So, obviously, she has been raped because nine year-olds don't have sex." Elliot cleared his throat, trying to compose himself. "Her parents say she hasn't been herself for a while, they just have been too preoccupied to really take notice. They claim they thought she was just growing up."

"She's nine?" Olivia asked incredulously.

"Nine years old in the third grade," Elliot confirmed.

Olivia nodded and peered through the oblong, rectangular window of the room, "OK, what are the things they've noticed that are different?"

Elliot sighed, "Bed wetting, crying and whining—which she never used to do—loss of appetite, sadness, scratching and/or rubbing her privates, complaining of burning during urination, withdrawing from family and friends. Mom says she used to be outgoing and the entertainer of the family and now, they can barely get a smile from her."

Olivia felt the fury rise in her being, "_Fuck_," she whispered.

"Liv…," Elliot tried, realizing her emotions were becoming more and more combustible.

Olivia looked back through the window, "Growing up? That's what they said? All of those signs and _that's_ what they have to say? How long have they been observing these signs, Elliot?" She looked back at him, scowling.

Elliot paused, looking Olivia dead in the eyes, unwavering. He waited, knowing that what he was about to say would enrage her beyond belief. "About eight months."

Olivia took a deep breath and drew her lips inward. She could feel her nostrils flare on their own volition. She folded her arms, looked up at the ceiling briefly and moved her neck around to stretch. "OK…I'm going in…"

Elliot stopped her with a hand clutching her bicep lightly. "Maybe you should take a few minutes, first."

Olivia pulled her arm away, not forcefully, but enough to let Elliot know to release her. "I'm fine, El. It's OK. I got it under control." She proceeded to turn the knob to the room and enter, Elliot following a safe distance like he always did with young girls, in case they had become leery of men.

Elliot and Olivia introduced themselves to the parents first, flashing their badges. Olivia walked up to the little girl in the bed and put on her best smile. She was so tiny in that bed, it seemed to engulf her. She definitely didn't seem nine years old. To Olivia she looked underweight, perhaps malnourished. Maybe it was the enormity of the situation but she seemed frail, almost fragile. "Hi, Audrey…my name is Olivia. I'm a police officer. She held out her badge for Audrey to hold. The little girl took it and held it in her tiny hand, running her fingers over the gold shield. She looked at Olivia and handed it back. As Olivia clipped it back on, she spoke again, "Honey, your mommy and daddy say that you've been very sad lately. Is that true?"

The little girl looked at her mother and father first and then back at Olivia before giving a very small nod.

Olivia smiled, her mouth shaking from the disingenuousness of this whole situation. She felt that something was definitely off here. This little girl had too many things that didn't seem right for her parents to bring her to the hospital eight months later and suddenly be concerned at 5:45 in the morning.

"What have you been sad about, Audrey?"

Audrey said nothing.

"Have you been sad about something at school? A friend? A boy? A teacher?" Olivia tried.

Still nothing.

"Is it something at home, honey, that's making you sad?"

Mr. McAdams stepped forward and out of the corner of her eye, Olivia saw him bring his mouth in close to Elliot's ear and in a hushed voice he spat, "I don't like what she is insinuating! There is nothing at home that could be making her sad."

Olivia took another deep breath and closed her eyes, willing the anger down. When she opened them, Mrs. McAdams spoke from her position on the other side of the bed next to Audrey, "We just can't seem to think of what's wrong with her. We have a very happy home."

Olivia lost it on the petite woman. Glaring, she requested, "Mrs. McAdams, can I speak to you in the hallway?" Olivia began walking to the door, Mrs. McAdams starting to follow when Audrey screamed out, "No! Mommy. Don't leave!"

"Mommy will only be a minute, baby," Mrs. McAdams tried to reassure her. "Daddy's with you."

"Noooooo!" she shrieked louder, flailing in her bed. Sheets flying. Olivia rushed to the bed on one side and the mother on the other.

They both attempted to hold the flailing nine-year-old down, carefully yet securely and without hurting her. Olivia whispered soft, "Shhhh's" and the mother stroked the girl's hair as she seemed to calm slightly. As Olivia had the little girl's arm, she saw a small amount of bluish color peeking out from underneath her pink long-sleeved, pajama shirt. Carefully, she inched the shirt upward to reveal horrible red welts, and blue and purple bruises, obviously freshly made.

Olivia's anger rose like a bubbling volcano, building and building until she walked around the bed, grabbed the mother by the elbow and escorted her from the room. Once in the hallway, Olivia shoved Mrs. McAdams forcefully backward. "Eight months, Mrs. McAdams? Eight months?" She shoved her shoulders again, the woman stumbling backward.

By this time Elliot and Mr. McAdams had come out of the room, a nurse rushing in to shield the little girl from the sight. Elliot was on high alert mode as he watched his partner, waiting, just in case he needed to intervene.

"You bring her in after eight months of _knowing_ something is wrong with her and not doing anything about it?" Olivia brought her face in within inches of Mrs. McAdams', "How'd she get those bruises, huh? And don't you _dare _tell me you don't know." She grabbed the woman's shirt, clenching the fabric at the shoulders. "I swear to God if I find out that you and your husband have been abusing that little girl I will make sure your asses sit in prison until you need adult diapers."

Mrs. McAdams began crying and shielding her face from Olivia's pulsing forehead vein. "Please don't hit me!" she wailed.

Olivia stood, opening and closing her fists as she stepped away from the mother.

From behind her, the father broke his silence, and belligerent rage suddenly bellowing from him, "That little girl is ruining everything! Christopher has a basketball scholarship and is going to be in the NBA. She'll ruin everything for us with her little stories! If anyone finds out, our dreams are ruined!" he yelled.

As if guided by an unknown poltergeist, Olivia flew at Mr. McAdams and swung a weighty punch into his nose. Instantly, he grabbed his face, blood spilling from his nostrils. Before Elliot could grab his partner by the waist, the detective swung once again, her fist coming in contact with his left eye, and she heard a crack. Mr. McAdams began to retaliate, stepping forward and bringing his fist back, "You bitch!"

Two burley men suddenly came up behind Mr. McAdams and held his arms so that he was powerless to move, much less punch Olivia.

Elliot's arms pulled the brunette firmly back away from the scene, her feet skimming over the floor as he practically lifted her and rushed with her about ten feet to clear her from the area, "Hey! Stay here. Calm down, Liv. Calm down!"

She didn't look at Elliot, only continued to glare at the father, now bloodied and starting to swell, the two men making sure he didn't advance and now two nurses at his sides, checking on his injuries.

Elliot moved in front of her glare to try and make eye contact. "Hey, Liv. Deep breaths."

She slowly looked up and into his blue eyes. "I can't do this, anymore, El." Her lower lip trembled and she could feel the tears filling her eyes. "I can't…"

Elliot walked her to a chair and she sat, staring at the floor, holding her right hand by the wrist. She didn't want to look down but knew her hand was ripped up, she could feel it. She had hit bone on both punches and she could feel the bruising and torn skin begin to pulsate and throb.

She heard Elliot talk to the burly men guarding Mr. McAdams from doing anything, "Watch him and make sure he doesn't go anywhere." Then he punched a button on his cell phone, "Fin, I need you at Mercy as soon as you can make it. Thanks man."

He closed it and knelt down in front of Olivia, resting his hands on her knees and urging her to look at him, "Liv? Fin is coming down. Maybe you should take a couple of days off and figure out what's going on. I'll tell the Cap'n."

Olivia didn't argue. The emotions of the last hour had exhausted her mentally and physically. The case she had before it lasted a full 78 hours. It had taken its toll. She felt like a different person—like she couldn't do her job any more. She hadn't been impartial and just listened and questioned like she usually did at first meetings with victims and victim's families. Something had taken hold of her and inhabited her body, some unknown force. Something had to give. She just wasn't sure what it was.

She didn't know how she got there, but she found herself standing in front of the hospital, Elliot holding her by the waist, her right hand bandaged. A black BMW convertible pulled into the drop off area where she and Elliot were standing. A tall blonde in jeans and a beige v-neck sweater got out and headed towards her.

"Alex?" She looked at Elliot and then back at the statuesque blonde.

"Cragen told me. I went to the station to see what we had so far. When you were getting your hand wrapped, Elliot called Fin and Fin told Cragen and Cragen told me to come pick you up to take you home, since I happened to be available."

"Oh," was all Olivia could manage."

Elliot ushered Olivia into the car and closed the door.

Alex walked around to the driver's side and Elliot followed. Alex opened the door and Elliot motioned for her to lean closer.

Whispering, Elliot stated, "Make sure she gets home OK. I don't think she's OK right now." He pointed to his head. "She was talking about quitting…" The pain in Elliot's eyes was almost unbearable.

"You have my word. I will take her home and make sure she's taken care of. I'll let you know how she is once we're settled."

"The captain said for her to take a few days off after this incident. There might be repercussions…but don't tell her that, please. Not yet," Elliot pleaded.

Alex slipped into the driver's side and Elliot closed the door.

The blonde turned to Olivia who was staring straight ahead, through the windshield. Alex put her hand on top of her uninjured hand that was on her thigh, squeezing gently. "Hey…"

Olivia turned to look at her, an immense sadness in her deep brown eyes. "I just want to go home, Alex." Her eyes filled with tears, "Please take me home."

"You got it, Baby." Alex shifted into gear and pulled out of the parking lot, ready to be available to Olivia, however she needed her to be.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note: OK, so I have been thinking…it's a wonder that the character of Olivia has even lasted 15 years in SVU, much less the 11 I am currently writing about. Everyone has a breaking point. I am surprised we have only seen her break down a handful of times in the course of 15 years. I am writing this as if the character of Olivia were a little more emotional, a little more human. In my opinion, it is unrealistic to have someone be so strong after going through so much. We've seen Olivia partake in the occasional wine recently on the show, only hinting to that dark path that she knows she could end up walking down, due to heredity and her mother's own alcoholism. She has also always been afraid of her own violence due to her father raping her mother. She will deal with these issues in this chapter.**

**This chapter will focus on Olivia's issues past and present. It will deal with her guilt, her mistrust, and her denial of her being deserving of happiness. Alex will be the one who helps her, although it will not be easy. **

**As trace619 said, "It's never easy, is it?"**

**Thank you for the favorites, follows and reviews. Please keep them coming as they are my encouragement!**

**Patricia**

8

Alex pulled her car up to the curb in front of Olivia's apartment, shifted into park, and turned the engine off. The ride had been silent, the blonde letting the detective have those moments to collect her thoughts. "We're here," Alex said softly as she watched Olivia for a moment and then took her own seatbelt off. Olivia's vacant eyes were still staring straight ahead. Alex got out of the car and walked around to Olivia's side, opening the door for her.

Finally, the detective looked at her. For the first time in the eleven years that they'd known each other, Alex could not read Olivia's expression at all. She didn't look angry, didn't look confused, didn't look sad—she just looked _there_, stoic. Alex reached her hand out for Olivia to take, "Honey, let's get you bathed and in some clean clothes. Come on." The attorney tried to sound positive but the knot of fear in her stomach was twisting and acidic. She didn't know exactly what had happened at the hospital. All she knew was that Olivia had struck a victim's father and that she would most likely get reprimanded over the ordeal—maybe even let go from SVU and possibly even the entire force. What she did know, for certain, was that she wanted—_needed_—to be there for Olivia in any way she sought. This was why Olivia's silence was so excruciating to the blonde. There had been many instances in the past when Olivia shut Alex out, not wishing the attorney to get involved. Olivia could be a bit of a self-loather at times and she was known to push people away. However, as much as she loved the detective, she would never turn her back again.

Finally, Olivia took Alex's hand and exited the car, Alex guiding her by the small of her back after shutting the door and pressing the alarm twice on her keychain. They walked up the steps to her lobby and walked to the elevators. Alex pressed the button as Olivia leaned against the far opposite wall, arms folded, staring at the floor. Olivia was distancing herself, not only physically but mentally as well. But, Alex could definitely see the wheels turning inside her mind. She imagined there were so many thoughts rolling around that beautiful mind, flying around without rest. The attorney could see the tears in the brunette's eyes threatening to fall, just at the brim of her lower lids.

The elevator chimed and the doors opened. "Liv?" Alex questioned cautiously, trying a smile. Olivia kept her eyes down and strode into the elevator, now completely avoiding eye contact. Once inside, the detective stared at the ceiling while Alex pushed the _3_.

Suddenly, Olivia spoke, "Why don't you just go home, Alex? You don't need to stay. I'm fine. Besides, you just being here with me might jeopardize your own career. You should probably go home and not contact me for a while. I'm in a lot of trouble, I know…" Olivia looked straight at Alex, steadfast, a determination on her exhausted face.

Alex could see the dark circles underneath the brunette's beautiful cocoa eyes. She had a few splatters of dried blood on her face and even more on the blue shirt she had borrowed. Her ponytail, perfect a couple of hours ago was slightly askew. She looked like she had just come back from battle.

Olivia stared at Alex, even after the doors had opened on her floor. Alex's expression was heartbreaking. The elevator doors closed and the elevator just sat there as the two women waited, watching each other. Olivia didn't want to do this to Alex but it was her pattern, she supposed. She knew she had just upset Alex with what she said. She could see the disappointment and confusion in those ocean blue eyes. Olivia hadn't meant what she had said; she just wanted the attorney to feel like she could run if she wanted to. Not get involved with someone as fucked up as she was.

Alex's eyes began to tear, but her face remained flat, only the immense sadness in her eyes betraying her. The voice that then came from the blonde was even and low, yet understandably shaky, "I'm not going anywhere, Liv. You'll have to wrestle me out of the door to get me to leave." She stepped closer to the detective and reached up, cupping the side of her neck, stroking her cheek softly with her thumb. "I want you to let me help you, Liv. I want to be whatever you need. We can fix this together…"

The elevator began going back down.

Alex was cut off by Olivia's haughty laugh. "Fix it? _Fix_ it? I have just _fucked_ my whole career in the space of ten minutes. Do you understand that? _Fucked_!" Olivia's bellowing voice startled Alex; she could see it in the lawyer's eyes.

_Why am I doing this to her? _Olivia thought. _I'm chastising the_ _woman I love and she's crying in front of you. She doesn't deserve this._ Olivia's eyes filled with tears once again.

The elevator stopped on the first floor again and a young man stepped on with a bicycle. "Hey Olivia!" he greeted.

Both women looked at the man, who obviously felt the tension from their gazes and noticed that both were crying.

With a sentiment she wasn't feeling at the moment, she smiled and said, "Hi, Spencer."

The ride back to the third floor was then silent, the two women simply looking at each other. Olivia had just committed the worst mistake of her career. She felt as if the world would end tonight.

The doors opened and Spencer stepped out first. "See ya later, Olivia."

Olivia didn't say anything she simply raised her eyebrows and motioned for Alex step off the elevator first. Alex exited and Olivia followed. The detective wasn't sure that Alex would be able to handle this particular Olivia. Not many people could, which was why she had remained alone fro so long.

Olivia attempted to retrieve her keys from her right pocket but the gauze surrounding her hand was too thick and prevented her from grabbing them.

Alex stilled her hand, looking into her eyes, resolute. Alex reached into Olivia's pocket, eyes not leaving the brunette, and got them out. There was an unspoken understanding. It was clear that Alex was not going anywhere and she would be a pain in the ass to Olivia no matter how the detective treated her. Olivia could feel fresh tears once again. The salt burned her tired, red-rimmed eyes. This time, she couldn't keep them from falling as Alex opened the door to the apartment and guided her inside. Within seconds, Olivia's tears turned into sniffles as they walked around to the couch. By the time they sat, her sniffles had turned into full-blown sobs, her body racked with emotion. Alex closely next to her, knees touching, held her, her arms wrapped tightly around the brunette, swaying her as her cries shook her trembling body uncontrollably. Olivia's own arms were grasped around the slender blonde's waist, gripping her without hesitance.

Olivia's head felt heavy, spinning with emotion. She rested her face in the crook of Alex's neck, breathing in her soap and perfume. Haggardly, she whispered, her voice scratchy, "I'm so tired, Alex."

"I know, Baby. I know." Alex began rubbing Olivia's back, rocking her soothingly.

They held each other for a while, simply being comforted by each other's presence. Once Olivia's grip loosened, Alex spoke. "Let me run you a nice, hot bath, with some lavender oil? Then you can crawl into bed and rest. How does that sound?"

Still pressed to Alex, Olivia mumbled, "Good…" exhaustion threatening to shut her down completely.

**A/N: Don't worry, it's coming. The conversation is coming. Olivia will spill a lot of emotions soon. Reasons she says what she says, does what she does. Alex will be a strong source of support.**

**What will come of the bath…hmmm…?**


	9. Chapter 9

9

Olivia sat on the edge of her bed, unbuttoning her shirt as Alex removed her ankle boots. After removing the shirt, Olivia looked down at the crusty brown spots on the linen material. "Oh, Alex. I'm so sorry. I ruined your shirt."

Alex took the shirt from Olivia and wadded it up, tossing it behind her dramatically, a slight smile on her face. "I don't give a damn about the shirt, Liv. I'm more concerned with your hand." The attorney delicately took her gauze-wrapped hand into her own. "How does it feel?"

"Truthfully, it hurts like a son-of-a-bitch." Olivia tried a smile, and then immediately remembered how she got the injury. She felt her lower lip begin to tremble and her tears start once again. "I lost my job, Alex. Almost twenty years of doing what I thought I loved and it's over." Olivia leaned forward, head down, forehead against Alex's chest as she sobbed openly.

The pain in Olivia's chest was severe, like a member of her family had been killed without warning. The thought that her career could be stripped away in a moment of her rash behavior was overwhelming.

Alex held her, rubbing soothing circles on her back, swaying her gently and whispering a soft, Shhhhh."

Olivia wanted to stay like this forever, shut the world out and just be with Alex, like this, every day, all day. She wondered how she had gone so long without feeling this way. She had grown so hard, almost calloused with the daily grind of pedophiles, rapists, abuse of the elderly, and incest that she realized that she had been flowing through each day without much feeling at all and that she had been doing this for a long time. When Alex left, it was even easier to wear that impenetrable armor—that _I don't give a shit about you, and you certainly don't give a shit about me_ façade. The armor made her comfortable; the armor protected her against being hurt.

She had become someone she never thought she would be. When she began at SVU, she had been so eager for the justice part of it and it was rewarding as cases were closed and sickos caught. As the years went by, she hadn't realized how it had worn her down, slowly broken her—didn't even realize that her career path was stealing a little bit of her soul with every case. What kind of person had she become that she would lose control like she had in a hospital? Had she become so angry and jaded that this what she now did, attack civilians in front of their innocent, nine year-old children?

Maybe snapping and attacking people was her new thing. She would black out and attack people—that was it. She had heard about this happening to people with mental illnesses, where they didn't recollect anything at all about their crimes. She knew she wanted to hit that despicable father—hurt him, for what he had said—so her anger was comprehensible. However, as she swung at him, an unfamiliar force was inside her, giving her superhuman strength. But after she attacked him, it was almost as if her memory had been erased because she hadn't remembered the nurses drawing blood, hadn't remembered them cleaning and wrapping her hand, and she hadn't remembered walking through the hospital with Elliot to the pick-up drive. What was happening to her?

What frightened Olivia the most was the question that kept nagging at her. Would she continue to attack people from now on and not remember it? Would she try to attack Alex?

This thought terrified her beyond belief.

Olivia's body went slack with fatigue and she just let Alex hold her. Her lean body felt so good, she smelled so good, and she just felt so…right.

Now that Alex was seemingly back in her life, the beautiful blonde had reminded Olivia that there was such thing as loving someone completely—feeling that tug at your heart strings when you look at them, the giddiness when you gaze into their eyes, the butterflies when they kiss you, and the heat and sexual sensations that were like no other.

But Olivia couldn't help but feel that the attorney was in for a very bumpy ride if she planned to stick it out with brooding, ornery, and sometimes self-detesting detective.

Olivia pulled away, still feeling her tears streaming down. "Oh, Alex…I really fucked up."

Alex couldn't help but raise the corners of her mouth ever-so-slightly. She had never heard Olivia swear so much but when the brunette did, it was almost charming.

She tucked a piece of hair that had fallen from her ponytail behind her ear and gently pat the tops of her thighs. "Let me get that bath started, OK?"

Alex left Olivia to remove the rest of her clothing as she went to get the bath drawn. She put the plug in and began filling it with very warm water and added some Epsom salts and a little lavender essential oil that she had remembered that Olivia kept under the bathroom sink. Olivia always took a detox bath at least once a month and Alex finding the familiar supplies underneath the sink told her that the ritual hadn't ceased.

She continued to let the tub fill as she lit a few candles and let her mind wander. When the detective mentioned it, Alex hadn't wanted to say or agree, conclusively, that Olivia had indeed lost her job. After all, she had no idea. She only knew only what Stabler had hinted to her and what she already knew about police brutality and the ramifications from her career in law. But she knew, whatever the outcome was, Olivia would be unhappy.

With the bathtub filled and vanilla candles lit around the sink, Alex, switched the light off, the glow from the candles leaving adequate lighting. She knew she would have to monitor Olivia while she was in the bath, as worn out as she was. She walked out into the bedroom and saw Olivia sitting on the bed, only her robe on. "Sweetheart…the bath is ready." Alex moved toward the brunette and stood, holding out her hand. Olivia took it and stood, a glimpse of a smile on her beautiful face. As they walked to the bathroom, Alex tried, "Later on, after you've rested, we can order Thai from Asian Station, your favorite…"

Once in the bathroom, Olivia stopped briefly. "Oh, this is beautiful, Alex…and it smells Heavenly. Thank you…" Olivia let the robe fall to the floor.

Alex couldn't control a small gasp or the sudden pull in between her legs at seeing Olivia's striking femininity in the candlelight.

Olivia slipped into the tub slowly, groaning from the warmth, taking care to keep her right hand out of the tub and on the ledge.

"Too hot?" Alex asked, worried.

Olivia closed her eyes, shook her head, and leaned her head back, moaning again. "It's perfect."

Once again, Alex had no control over the warm twitching emanating from her center. _Jesus, Alex. Get yourself together!_ she begged.

"I didn't realize how sore I was…" Olivia mumbling, her voice fading.

Alex sat on the closed seat of the toilet, just watching Olivia. She wanted to make sure she didn't sink if she fell asleep but she also didn't mind ogling the sexy brunette in a voyeuristic manner. Those bountiful tanned breasts bobbing just above the water, nipples pebbled, were just one of Alex's favorite features on her brunette detective. Then there were those golden, toned legs, her soft knees bent and exposed to the air. Even though her belly was concealed by the refraction of the water, Alex could see the flat, firmness of it.

The attorney's mouth actually started watering, or was it drool? Alex licked her lips, closed her mouth, and cleared her throat.

Eyes still closed, Olivia asked, her voice almost a whisper, "Everything OK?" Then a smiled began to creep up on her face.

_She knows I'm watching her._

"Yeah," Alex started. "I just don't want you to fall asleep."

"Well," Olivia began, "Why don't you do something to make sure I don't…"

Alex was slightly stunned. What was Olivia asking for? That could mean so many things…

Olivia reached for the washcloth that was sitting on the ledge and handed it to Alex.

_Oh_, Alex thought. _Right_.

Alex could see Olivia's body begin to shake, uncontrollably.

She was laughing at her.

The laugh turned into a full-blown guffaw, Olivia obviously releasing some pent up stress. Once she calmed down and her chuckle turned into a mere smile, she looked at Alex.

"I'm sorry," Olivia began, "Your face, Alex." She began laughing again. "You should have seen it."

Alex straightened, "I'm glad you can get a laugh from my discomfort." She dunked the washcloth under the warm water and then squirted some _Herbal Paradise_—or so the body wash claimed—onto the washcloth and began rubbing it to suds it up.

Olivia turned her head and looked at Alex. "Does this seem so foreign to you, Alex?" Her face was calm. "You, me, and a bathtub?"

Alex shook her head, afraid of the voice that would be emitted if she spoke.

Alex took the washcloth and began at Olivia's left shoulder, moving down along her arm, her olive-toned muscles defined, and soaped her up. She lifted Olivia's arm and proceeded to softly wash underneath, and then let her arm down slowly, almost methodically. She repeated the same motions on the other side, all the while, Olivia watching Alex as the blonde concentrated on her mission at hand.

Olivia watched Alex as she bathed her. The blonde's eyes remained focused on the washcloth in her hand, giving care and love to every aspect of washing Olivia. Olivia tilted her neck as Alex washed on one side, then the other and then the back of her neck. When Alex plunged the washcloth back under the water and put more body wash on it, her eyes finally went to Olivia's, the blue pools of her eyes a darker hue than only moments earlier. In the blonde's eyes was pure, unadulterated adoration and desire.

Olivia whispered, "Come here…"

Alex leaned forward and brought her lips to Olivia's, hovering only millimeters from each other. Alex's warm, sweet breath on Olivia's mouth shot straight to her core, a burning pulsation beginning. Olivia leaned forward still and parted her lips as she pressed them to Alex's warm, waiting lips, the kiss turning very quickly from soft and gentle, to blazing and ferocious, tongues fighting for power. Alex stood slightly to slip off of the lid and kneeled in front of the tub for better access. Olivia felt Alex's hands running through her wet hair, her hands wandering her neck and shoulders. Olivia cupped Alex's face with her bare hand and wrapped hand as the kiss intensified to heavy breathing and the rolling of eyes. Olivia's heart was racing, her blood rushing throughout her body.

Gasping for air, Alex broke the contact first, Olivia whimpering from loss of contact. Olivia opened her eyes to watch her girlfriend's right hand disappear underneath the water. Before Olivia could say a syllable, she felt skilled, slender fingers stroking the length of her slit. The lubrication of the warm water and the state of Olivia's current arousal had Alex's first three fingers inside of the detective almost immediately. Olivia kept eye contact with Alex as she continued to pump her fingers in and out, a constant motion and rhythm working to bring the detective to climax.

The world fell away as Alex continued to thrust her accomplished hand in and out. Olivia could see the yearning in Alex's eyes, getting just as much out of this as she was. As Olivia's breathing became quick, labored panting, Alex strategically began rubbing the brunette's clit in the same rhythm as her fingers as Olivia felt her inner walls tighten, threatening release.

Within moments, Olivia gasped and closed her eyes, head thrown back as her orgasm took over her body, her body contracting around Alex's fingers.

"That's it, Baby…" Alex soothed, kissing Olivia's temple. "Let it go…"

Once Olivia's aftershocks subsided, she opened her eyes, mouth opened and slowly turned to look at Alex. Her eyes began to tear, "Why can't it be that easy?"

Alex looked at her with confusion, "What baby?"

Olivia sniffed, "Life. Just beautiful like that…that's how life should be…" Olivia could feel her lids drooping, threatening to close. Mumbling, she closed her eyes, "There's so much bad out there, Alex…too much bad…"

Alex caught Olivia before she began slipping into slumber. "Hey, Baby…" she grabbed Olivia's chin and jostled her slightly. Olivia opened her eyes briefly, "…let's get you dried off and in bed…"

In the next few minutes, Olivia was standing, being dried off, then being escorted back into her bedroom. She kept her eyes opened but she felt like a zombie. Her exhaustion, coupled with physical contentment from her release, had her staring at no spot in particular in the direction of the bedroom window.

Alex brought one of Olivia's four-sizes-too-big concert t-shirts from her younger years over to her. "Raise your arms, Baby," Alex requested and Olivia obliged. She slipped the black t-shirt with a big-haired Bon Jovi emblazoned on the front over her head, through the neck hole and then and brought her arms through the sleeves.

Olivia felt sleep coming quickly. Alex pulled the covers aside and Olivia slipped into the bed, her eyes already closed. The blonde pulled the covers over Olivia.

"I love this shirt," Olivia snickered.

Olivia could hear the smile in Alex's voice, "I know you do, Baby…"

The brunette felt Alex's tender lips on her forehead.

Before she knew it, Olivia's body yielded to slumber.


	10. Chapter 10

10

Olivia's eyes slowly peeled open, the smell of coffee permeating her senses. She looked up to examine at the alarm clock, 4:02 p.m. Thunder echoed in the near distance and she could hear raindrops hitting the bedroom window before she even looked. It was absolutely pouring outside. Par for the course, she supposed.

She let her head fall heavily back down and reached for her iPhone on the bedside table. Checking her inbox for her text messages, she found that there were none. She put the phone back and closed her eyes again, dwelling once more on the rash act that would most likely cost her so much. There was no excuse for what she did—not for her, not for Elliot, not for any officer of the law. Her job was to remain calm and handle civilians with respect and caution, not beat them to a bloody pulp. She hadn't gotten any texts from Cragen or Elliot or even Fin. She wouldn't be surprised if IAB got involved, although what had happened in the hospital hallway did not need an investigation and was fairly cut and dry and she would absolutely admit to her wrong doing when questioned—which she knew would be in the very near future.

She wanted to know so badly what was going to happen to her and she _needed_ to know before she went out of her mind. Letting out a substantial sigh, she opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling.

"Hey, Sleeping Beauty," Alex began as she walked into the room with two espresso demitasses in her ivory hands.

"Hey," Olivia yawned, sitting up.

Alex walked up to Olivia and handed her a tiny cup. "Thanks..." She took a small sip, the brew scalding hot. "You found my espresso machine." She smiled. "I'm glad…I've had that thing for three years and have never taken the time to figure it out."

The detective watched as Alex sat in the puffy armchair in her bedroom. The ADA had file folders and papers strewn all around the chair, her leather attaché leaning against the ottoman, and her laptop now on her lap. She must have had those case files in her car, Olivia mused.

"Catching up on business?" Olivia asked.

"More like getting _ahead_ of business…" Alex smirked. "You know I don't like to be _behind_ on anything, detective." Alex took a small sip of her espresso and set it on the small table next to the chair. "How are you feeling?" The attorney's eyes pierced her own, concern and love within those blue pools.

Olivia took a deep breath, "You know…I can't stop thinking about it…I think I even dreamed about it."

Alex nodded slowly.

"Any word from the precinct?" Olivia asked, knowing Alex would have told her if there had been, unless the news was bad, then she might hesitate.

Alex shook her head while taking another sip. "Not yet…I told Elliot I'd call him once you got settled."

Olivia narrowed her eyes, "Settled? Into what? Unemployment?" She laughed lightly but felt her tears form again. God, she was emotional. She shook her head as if to shake off the tears.

Alex stood and put her laptop on the chair and then walked up to the bed, sitting right next to Olivia. She moved a piece of hair behind the brunette's ear and cupped her cheek in her hand. "Don't do this to yourself, Liv. You made a mistake. In the heat of passion, your emotions took over and you slugged the guy. It's called having feelings."

Olivia's tears were now falling, she sniffed. "It's more than that, Alex…" Olivia didn't finish her thought. She didn't actually know what she was trying to say, so many thoughts were running around her mind. She wanted to tell Alex that maybe she was unpredictable like a rabid dog—that she didn't even know who she was any more and that maybe she was dangerous.

"No matter what happens," Alex began, "I will be here for you. I'm not going anywhere, Liv. _Ever_."

Alex leaned in and gently pressed her lips to Olivia's trembling mouth.

Olivia wanted to tell Alex to run. Go as far as she could away from her. But she let the blonde envelop her in her arms and be gently soothed. It was all she could do for now.

Alex dialed the number for Olivia's favorite Asian restaurant and waited. She eyed Olivia as the brunette sat on the sofa in the living room, staring at an infomercial that was excitedly toting an extraordinary exercise product. Even though the brunette had the remote in her hand, she continued to watch the Shake Weight™ commercial, seemingly enraptured, although Alex knew she wasn't exactly watching it.  
"Yes," Alex answered, "I would like to place an order for delivery…" Alex waited for the voice on the other end to prepare. "OK, one order of edamame, one cold sesame spinach noodles, one green curry prawn combo, and one General Tso's chicken…no, no drinks…yes…" Alex reached for her purse and took her credit card from her wallet. After reading off the credit card number, she gave Olivia's address and then disconnected the call.

She observed Olivia, noting that she was crying once again. The detective reached in front of her and retrieved a couple of tissues from the box on the coffee table and blew her nose heartily.

Alex walked up to Olivia on the sofa and sat next to her. "Food will be here in about forty-five minutes."

Olivia turned and looked at Alex, her eyes filled with angst, but attempting a smile nonetheless. She nodded, her face contorting in sorrow again. Olivia buried her face in her hands and sobbed uncontrollably.

Alex scooted even closer and put her arm around her detective and put her chin on Olivia's shoulder, squeezing the opposite shoulder comfortingly. Alex had no idea what to say to make her feel less hopeless. She could only offer the comfort of herself.

"I need a drink," Olivia whispered. She got up and padded into the kitchen, the thick fluffy socks making her trip noiseless. Reaching up into the top cabinet above the microwave, she lifted onto her tip-toes and grabbed a bottle.

Alex entered the kitchen and leaned with her back against the counter, hands clasped behind her. Olivia looked irresistibly adorable in her big black t-shirt that came to her mid thighs and big, downy socks. However, the fact that she wanted a drink right now to deal with her emotions didn't make Alex very comfortable. Olivia could be either be extremely happy when drinking or nasty and self-loathing when drinking. It just depended on her mood at the time. Knowing her current state of emotions, Alex feared for the latter.

"Elliot gave this to me for Christmas. He said it's the best whiskey there is." Olivia unscrewed the cap, breaking the safety seal on the bottle of Jameson® whiskey and laughed lightly. "At a hundred twenty-five dollars a pop, it'd better be good." Olivia retrieved two small glasses from the cabinet and then turned to Alex, "Ice?"

Alex nodded, worry etched on her face.

"Oh, come on, Alex. I just want a little drink to take the edge off."

Alex whispered, her voice barely audible, "There are other ways…"

Olivia's brown eyes flashed at the blonde. "What do you suggest? Needlepoint? A nice run through the rain? Going to the squad gym and running the risk of embarrassment?" Olivia brought the ice-filled glasses to the counter where Alex was leaning. She filled each glass one-third of the way and then capped the bottle. Holding her glass in the air, she waited for Alex to lift her own. After they clinked a cheers, Olivia declared, "Bottom's up," a steely expression on her face, her nose red from crying. She downed half the contents immediately and took her glass to the sofa to sit and began flipping through channels, legs tucked underneath her.

Alex joined her on the sofa, cautiously sitting cross-legged and then looking at the TV, her glass resting on her thigh. She took her glasses off, folded them, and set them on the coffee table before leaning back. She took a tiny sip and then proceeded to continue the conversation. She questioned, "How about talking, Liv? That's one way…"

"I'm sure that'll come soon enough," she stated as she held her glass into the air. "To fucking my career and myself in the process." She waited for Alex to clink glasses and when the blonde didn't respond, Olivia took a large gulp anyway.

Alex took a slow, deep breath, trying not to let Olivia hear. However, she did.

"What is it, Alex? Is it the drinking or my abrupt tone or maybe it's the fact that everything can't fixed with sex?" Olivia finished off her glass and walked into the kitchen, retrieved the bottle and brought it back to the sofa, tucking her legs underneath her, once more. She poured herself more, looked at Alex's glass and noted that not much was gone, and then capped the bottle, placing it to the coffee table.

_She's going to be an angry drunk_, Alex thought with dismay.

It wasn't often Olivia drank, at least not when they had been dating five years prior, but things could have changed. She didn't know what patterns Olivia had gotten herself into over the past five years, good or bad. She did say that she had been in a depression, a slump, for the first four years after Alex had gone into WitSec, but so had the attorney. All Alex knew at that moment was that the vibes that she was getting from Olivia were like solar flares licking at her skin—burning, off-putting and explosive. They weren't the vibes that she and the beautiful detective had shared the day before, which had been ethereal and Heavenly.

They sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity while Alex watched Olivia from the corner of her eye as she stared blankly at the television. The infomercial channel was now playing an episode of _Who's the Boss_? It was the one where Angela and Tony have to sleep in the same bed together and they hang a sheet in between to separate the bed to keep them on their respective sides. Alex continued to eye the brunette as Olivia continued to toss back the strong liquid, not pausing for anything.

"Jesus, Alex…" Olivia complained. "What is it? Is my hair sticking up? What is _up_?"

Alex ground her teeth and looked back at the screen. "Nothing's wrong, Liv. Nothing at all."

Alex wanted so badly to be comforting to Olivia during this time of need but she was making it very difficult. This cantankerous side, Alex usually found incredible irresistible in a sadistic sort of way. Many heated fights had been had at work where Olivia would get like this, cheeks flushed, insults flying, blush creeping along collarbones, both of them one second away from grabbing the other and attacking mouths, hands groping. But right now, Olivia shutting her out and choosing the alcohol instead of communication was more than frustrating. It broke Alex's heart.

What seemed like an eternity of sitting mindlessly in silence must have been only about forty minutes or so because the buzzer for the downstairs door rang. Alex began to get up from the sofa but was stopped by Olivia's hand on her knee.

"I'll get it…you've done enough…"

_What did that mean? _Alex thought at once.

Olivia wavered slightly upon standing, walked to the intercom by the door, and depressed the button. "Yes?"

"Delivery from Asian Station."

"Come on up." Olivia depressed the button that would unlock the front door downstairs and returned to the sofa, sitting on the edge, ready to get the door again, and poured herself more whiskey.

Alex eyed the bottle. She didn't want to be confrontational but she wanted communication open, so she asked, "What did that mean, I've done enough?"

Olivia licked her lips after taking a large swig. "You've done enough," she stated matter-of-factly. "For God sake, Alex…you came and got me from the hospital, you bathed me, paid for dinner, have stayed here with my fun-loving self…that's all I meant." Olivia's speech was now slightly slurred. Alex knew she hadn't eaten since the previous evening and the alcohol was hitting her with force, not to mention the fact that she was two drinks ahead of Alex.

There was knock on the door. Olivia began to get up but, this time, Alex stopped her. "I'll get it this time. I'm wearing pants."

Olivia sat back down as Alex walked to the door and opened it.

"Delivery?"

"Yes." Alex said as the teenage boy handed Alex two plastic bags full of delicious smelling food. She placed them on the floor as he handed her the receipt and a pen.

"Just sign right here."

Alex quickly figured the tip and then scrawled her signature and handed him the paper and pen, his eyes glued on the pant less woman on the sofa, who had resumed staring at the TV. Olivia noticed the silence and then looked toward the door, smiled, and then held up her glass to toast the delivery boy.

Alex could see why he was staring, although Olivia was very obviously oblivious to how she looked. The brunette had made herself comfortable on the sofa and was now lying down the length of the sofa, her t-shirt barely covering her beige silk underwear underneath.

Alex turned back to the mesmerized boy. "Thank you." She closed the door and picked up the bags from the floor and walked them into the kitchen. She placed them on the counter and then returned, tossing a throw from the back of the chair at Olivia. "Well, if he wasn't a man yet, you've made him one now…" Alex folded her arms.

"What?" Olivia looked truly confused.

"You gave that poor boy an erection with your ensemble, or lack thereof." She indicated by nodding and raising her eyebrows at Olivia's lower half.

Olivia looked down, "Oh, Jesus, Alex. Loosen up…" She tossed the blanket aside and stood bringing her glass and bottle with her into the kitchen. "You're always so fucking tense. You need to learn to have a good time. You don't even seem like you're happy to be here," she slurred. "You've had this serious, pissed-off, cold look on your face since we got here."

Alex's eyes began to sting as they filled with tears. She knew Olivia didn't mean what she had said but it hurt, nonetheless. Olivia began rooting around the bags, taking Styrofoam containers out and spreading them along the counter, not even realizing the effect her words had on the blonde. Alex removed herself from the room and went into the master bathroom, closing the door quietly behind her and sitting on the ledge of the bathtub. She began to cry.

Olivia looked up, ready to dig into the food. She hadn't realized how hungry she was until she began smelling the garlic and spices. "Alex?" she questioned, stepping into the living area and waiting. "Alex?" she called again, this time walking down the short hallway to the bedroom. "Alex, are you in here?"

Olivia heard a noise behind her from inside the bathroom, it was a muffled whimper.

Alex was crying. _Shit_, Olivia thought, guiltily. She closed her eyes briefly, the room beginning to spin, and rubbed her forehead with her hand. Walking to the bathroom door, she had to steady herself against the dresser next to it.

"Alex?" Olivia asked, her voice coming out softer. "Are you OK? Food's getting cold."

"Go ahead and eat, Olivia. I'm not feeling well." Alex's voice was direct yet shaky.

"Al, is it your stomach? Maybe it's the espresso…" Olivia was still trying to piece it together.

"It's not my stomach, _Detective_…" the muffled voice continued.

_That was a slap_, Olivia mused.

Olivia took a step back as she heard the bathroom handle turning, a red-cheeked, tear stained Alex looking at her determinedly as she exited, and then stood with her arms folded, facing the window. "I want us to be open with each other," Alex began.

Olivia waited, not saying anything. The buzz she was feeling right now was perfect. She didn't feel any emotions and she wanted to keep it that way. She didn't want to think about anything except eating and sleeping. Was that so wrong?

Alex turned, a questioning look on her face. "Don't _you_?"

Olivia sat on the edge of the bed before she fell over. "What do you want me to say, Alex?" She rubbed her face with both hands and then scratched her head vigorously before looking back at the blonde.

Alex approached Olivia and knelt in front of her, placing her hands on her knees, "I want you to talk to me, tell me what you're feeling instead of making jabs at me and saying things I know you don't mean." Alex's eyes watered mercilessly, the tears threatening to spill.

Olivia realized now, why Alex was upset. Even though her head was fuzzy and her mind not working efficiently at the moment, she realized what she had done to Alex. Olivia began crying. "And _this_ is why you don't need me!" She said angrily. She ran her fingers through her hair and put her arms behind her. "Are you a glutton for punishment?

Alex shook her head.

"Because you'd have to be to want to be with me." Olivia continued. "Yesterday was perfect because it had been so long since we had seen each other. Since we had alone, together time just between us. It was perfect because I think we both forgot…"

Through tears, Alex questioned, "Forgot what, Olivia?"

Olivia shook her head and laughed lightly. She stood abruptly, stumbling in the process. She walked to the window and stared out at the darkening sky, the lampposts just illuminating. Spencer was out on the sidewalk with his dog Mitzi. It seemed like things should be perfect.

She could feel herself swaying, becoming slightly nauseated from the lack of food in her stomach. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she felt Alex's presence, waiting patiently behind her. "That I could be this way. That I can sometimes be the person you wondered why you ever even bothered with."

"But, I can be, too, Liv…" Alex tried.

Olivia shook her head, her nausea growing, "I am so screwed up…I can't even have a normal relationship…" She held her forehead in her hands. "Someone as perfect and wonderful as you wants me and I have to mess it up like always."

She could feel Alex's warm hands clasp her arms and her breath on her cheek as she rested her chin on her left shoulder. Suddenly, Alex's cell phone rang. Alex waited for a moment, rubbing Olivia's upper arms…

"Just get it," Olivia said, walking away and sitting in the puffy armchair, leaning her whirling head back.

She listened as Alex answered. "Cabot…yeah…OK…allright…OK, we'll be here…OK, see you soon." She disconnected the phone and slipped it back in her jeans pocket.

Olivia just looked at Alex, eyebrows raised, waiting. "And?"

"That was Elliot…"

"OK…and he _said_…" Sarcasm overflowed from Olivia.

"He's coming over with news…" Alex looked down at Olivia's legs. "Maybe you should put some pants on."

Olivia glared at Alex, her nausea and heat in her cheeks from the alcohol making her even angrier.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: This chapter shows the perseverance of a certain blonde attorney. It also shows that Olivia is aware of her behavior. You can look forward to a bit of a vacation in the next chapter. Things will come together soon.**

**Enjoy and please review!**

11

"Go to hell, Alex…," she muttered. Olivia stood, strode over to the drawer of her bureau, opened the bottom drawer, grabbed a pair of gray sweatpants, slammed it and then hastily put them on, taking three tries to get her left leg in. "_This_ is why I didn't want to meet you for brunch, Alex! You should have left me alone and you could have found someone who deserves you and is actually nice to you." She began walking from the room, and muttered, "I have to eat something or I'm gonna be sick." She exited the room and headed towards the kitchen, trailing her hand along the wall for balance as she went.

Alex sat on the bed, her mind a whir of activity, telling herself that reasoning and realism, and faith were three of the most important traits that she needed right now. She would not, _absolutely would not,_ give up on Olivia. She knew that Olivia was going through one of the hardest times in her life right now. Everything seemed hopeless and miserable to her. The detective would see, perhaps this evening or perhaps tomorrow, that drinking too much was never worth it, as she had done on the very few occasions in the past that she had imbibed more than was necessary. Alex didn't know what she would do if things between them didn't get better. She didn't even want to think about Olivia not digging herself out of her hole of self-doubt and hatred. This situation was ripping her apart. It was ripping them both apart. Twenty-four hours ago, Alex never would have thought that a curveball of this magnitude would be thrown at Olivia, at them, at the stability of their just blossoming relationship. But, like they say, for better or worse…

She had been in love with Olivia for over ten years—openly in love with her for five, and the same had been true of the brunette detective. They had so much pull, so much chemistry intellectually and even more physically. They knew each other inside and outside that sometimes talking wasn't even required. She had always known, undeniably, that Olivia was the one for her. She made her feel like she had never felt in her life. Even when at odds, as they were currently, Alex loved Olivia more than she had ever loved another soul. The attorney understood that underneath that angry façade was a vulnerable, wounded woman that just wanted love and to know that love would never leave.

Alex moved to the bathroom to wash her face and hands before she joined Olivia in the kitchen for what she knew would be a tense meal.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Olivia's hands shook as she plated a little bit of all dishes. She could feel her blood sugar low from not eating in almost twenty-four hours. She felt like shit, like she was going to pass out. She sat at the kitchen table and began eating hastily. Olivia knew that Alex was doing all she could to not get upset with her. The self-restraint and patience the blonde was demonstrating with the detective's drunk, angry ass was admirable. But Olivia didn't want her to feel like she _had_ to stay. The brunette didn't want love out of obligation like her mother had done for so long. She wanted love unconditionally, ups and downs, good and bad, bitch and angel. Alex had seemed to be weathering the wrath of Olivia's personal hurricane fairly well, until Olivia spat at her about being uptight and not wanting to be there.

Olivia wanted to be mad at Alex but she knew, deep in her soul, that she could never be mad at the blonde attorney that made her life so much easier to live. Still, at the moment, feeling like everything that could go wrong was actually going wrong—even the whiskey was going wrong—Olivia was in a foul mood and she thought she deserved it. Part of her wanted to wallow in it because everything that had happened so far had all been her fault.

Alex entered the kitchen, her eyes focused on the food on the counter, her silky hair now in a ponytail, glasses on. Olivia watched her as she took the plate the detective left her on the counter and began serving herself small portions of each. Once finished, she finally looked up at Olivia, her expression apathetic. She walked to the kitchen table and sat, opened her paper napkin, and placed it on her lap.

She was so beautiful, cultured, and exquisite. Olivia watched as she lifted her fork and took a small piece of chicken, took it into her mouth and chewed slowly, all the manners of the debutant that the detective knew she had been in her early teen years.

Olivia, now finished eating, a small amount of liquor left in her glass, rested her forehead in her hand, waiting for the food to absorb some of the alcohol and the room to stop spinning.

The buzzer rang for the downstairs door. "I'll get it," Alex said while standing. She glided over to the door and depressed the button. "Yes?"

"It's Elliot."

"Come on up. Door will be open." Alex unlocked the door and returned to her seat at the table, briefly looking at Olivia, who still had her forehead in her palm.

"I can't do this…" Olivia felt her tears once again. Whatever news Elliot had, she knew it wasn't good. If it had been good news, he could have called her and told her about it himself. However, he was here at her apartment, making a special trip to relay information.

Alex was silent, once again focusing on her food as the door opened and closed.

"Hey ladies," he began, walking up to the table. He could obviously sense the tension at the table because he looked back and forth between the women for a moment trying to get a read on both of them.

"Have a seat, El." Olivia commanded as she poured herself a bit more and filled an empty glass on the table with some for her partner.

"Is this the Jameson®?" he questioned, smiling.

"That, it is, my friend." Olivia held up her glass in an air cheer to Elliot, winking slightly. "I wanted to taste it—"

"She's done more than taste it," Alex interrupted.

Olivia scowled but didn't retort. Elliot looked at the half finished bottle and then at Olivia, concern now wrinkling his features, "Did you just open that, Liv?"

Olivia nodded quickly, her eyes reddening and filling with tears. "I've had too much…" she admitted, her tears streaming now and her nose running relentlessly.

Alex finally looked at her, pity in the blonde's eyes then she looked back at Elliot. "What news have you got, Elliot?"

Olivia slurred, "Just give it to me straight…I can take it." She was sobbing now, uncontrolled heaves taking over her body.

"Hey…" Elliot got up and walked up to Olivia, bending down to wrap her in his arms. "…you're not fired, Liv. So, don't think it's that. You're still my partner."

Olivia's relief washed over her in the form of more crying. She gripped Elliot's back as he held her, her sobs gradually slowing down.

He pulled away and held her by the elbows as he knelt down. He looked at Alex and then back at Olivia.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex was as relieved as Olivia was that she still had her job but the way Elliot just looked at her, the attorney knew there was more to the story and that Olivia wouldn't be happy.

Elliot took a deep breath.

"What, El?" she whined. "What is it?"

"Cragen had to go to IAB with your case, just to make sure everything was done according to protocol. Although there doesn't need to be an investigation Cragen thought it best that this altercation went through their team to come up with the best solution. Technically, Mr. McAdams _could have_ filed a complaint with the Civilian Complaint Review Board if he hadn't been arrested himself."

"So he was arrested…good." Olivia sniffed, wiping her nose with her napkin.

"What were the charges?" Olivia questioned.

_She seems to be better calmer now_, Alex noted.

Elliot continued, "Neglect, endangering a child, and being an accomplice and/or participant in the rape of a child."

"Good," Olivia sniffed. "And the little girl?"

"CPS put her in a temporary foster home until she can get permanent placement. She'll need a lot of therapy, though."

Olivia started sobbing again. "That poor girl…" She reached for her glass but Elliot took it from her hand.

He handed the glass to Alex and Alex placed it on the other end of the table.

"Liv, there's more…" he sighed once again. "This is the part you're not gonna like."

Olivia straightened, steeling herself for his next words.

"IAB has decided, and Cragen agrees, that you take one month of unpaid leave, effective immediately." Elliot squeezed Olivia's hands that he was now holding in her lap.

Olivia nodded, her face contorting with pain, humiliation, and loss. "I understand," she whispered. She put her elbows on the table and put her face in her hands, continuing to cry, letting out her relief, her pain, and her temporary loss.

Elliot turned to Alex as he stood. Alex could not fight the empathetic tears that had formed in her own eyes. Olivia was suspended but not forever. She would go back to work and resume what she loved doing.

"I'm gonna go." He leaned over and kissed her forehead. "Liv, call me if you need anything but, I have a feeling you have someone wonderful to take care of you." Elliot winked at Alex and then motioned for her to follow him to the door, Olivia's head was now buried in folded arms on the table.

Alex escorted Elliot to the door. He lowered his voice as he opened the door and they stepped into the hallway, Alex shutting the door quietly behind them.

Elliot spoke low, "Take care of her, Alex. That drinking thing…doesn't need to happen. I'm not going to tell you how to act or what to say because you've known Liv almost as long as I have. Just…" his voice cracked with emotion, "…make sure she's OK."

Alex nodded, "I will, Elliot…it's difficult right now but she'll be OK."

Elliot took Alex into a surprising hug, and spoke into her shoulder, "She's always loved you, you know."

Alex's tears returned. "I know…and I, her."

Elliot pulled away. "OK, let me know if you need anything, anything at all."

Alex nodded and Elliot disappeared down the stairs and out of sight.

AOAOAOAOAOAO


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: The talk of the "get away" is here! Things come together in this chapter and we see that the women truly are in love and meant for the other. The "trip" is in the net chapter.**

**Side Note: I am a teacher and we started back this past week. I am only able to write in the evenings, so I will try very hard to get at least a chapter out a week until this story concludes.**

**Patricia**

12

The sound of a lone cricket somewhere in the apartment, the swish of cars passing by in the rain on the wet street below, and the faint snores coming from the sleeping brunette to her left were all that could be heard as Alex lay in bed, the moonlight casting a glow leading from the floor up onto the bed. It was _12:15_ and Olivia had been sleeping fitfully for the past hour after sobbing herself to sleep in Alex's arms.

After Elliot had left, Olivia admitted that she had way too much to drink and was already regretting it. The next few hours were spent with Olivia's arms either wrapped around the base of the toilet, Alex holding her hair away from her face and rubbing her back, or the two women sitting on the sofa watching a _Three's Company_ marathon, Olivia's arms wrapped around Alex's waist as she sat with her head on Alex's lap, the attorney holding a cold washcloth to the detective's forehead.

Olivia had apologized repeatedly in the midst of her misery, tears and snot running profusely, half a box of Kleenex© used. Alex felt for Olivia. The brunette knew drinking had been a mistake and she knew she was paying for it in a big way. Once her body had expelled all consumed items from the afternoon and evening—both liquid and solid—and then, when there was nothing else to expel, Olivia still continued to run to the bathroom many more times throughout the course of those six hours, nothing left in her stomach but bile.

Finally, she was sleeping. It seemed her body had finally slipped into a deep, peaceful sleep. Alex had given her a packet of Emergen-C™ and two Advil before Olivia finally decided to pull the covers over herself at 11:00 and try to rest. The past hour, Alex watched Olivia as she repeatedly turned left, right, rolled on her back, flipped on her stomach—her body and constantly running mind fighting the sleep she so desperately needed.

Now she was still, her breathing heavy and deep, but steady. She was so exhausted. Alex reached over to her back and traced her finger along her shoulder blade, eliciting a contented moan from her overly fatigued girlfriend.

Alex knew what she wanted to do and hoped Olivia was up for her plan. Her parents' beach house in South Hampton was empty at present, her parents in their villa in Mallorca for the winter. Alex wanted to take Olivia there and help her relax, recoup, and just spend some time thinking. Fresh sea air, fresh seafood, a good book, and each others' arms were the only things they needed. Alex had the vacation time coming and needed a break as well. It was the perfect plan. She would bring it up at breakfast the following morning. The attorney only hoped Olivia would be open to it.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Olivia trudged down the narrow hallway as she squinted, her hand holding her forehead, feeling every tortuous step. The pounding in her head was only exacerbated by the light from the living room windows, the blaring radio, and Alex clanging whatever she was clanging in the kitchen.

"Hey, babe…" Alex said softly as she noticed Olivia enter, smiling and walking up to her, placing her hands on the detective's cheeks. Alex then felt her forehead with the back of her hand before placing a tender kiss on her lips. "Feeling any better, Liv?"

Olivia's face looked pale, almost sallow. She had had a rough night last night and the substantial dark circles underneath her eyes and her reddened corneas gave her away. She was undoubtedly hung over.

"How about something really simple for breakfast, Liv? Maybe some French toast? Or something even simpler like plain old dry toast?"

Olivia sat at the kitchen table and grunted. Her half smile showed her attempt at being positive. "Make whatever you'll like, too…" Olivia said quietly. "I probably won't have much, although my stomach is growling like crazy, I don't have an appetite. The whole idea makes me feel sick again."

"OK…I looked through your cabinets and you still only have one frying pan, a small pot, and the one colander?"

"Yep," Olivia stated. "The past five years, I just haven't been home, Alex. Literally. The first two years, I worked nonstop and mostly slept in the cribs because I couldn't come back to the part-time home we had made. I wanted to wait until…I guess I was just…I was waiting until I…" Olivia stopped herself from floundering further, playing with the corner of the table runner.

"Until you what, Liv?" Alex questioned, sitting next to the detective.

Olivia looked into her eyes, her immense grief still apparent. She shook her head and looked down at her thumbnail, fidgeting.

"Olivia," Alex took her busy hands in her own. "Wait until you what?"

Olivia took a deep breath, no tears, just a straight-forward admission, "Until

I lived again…loved again…" Olivia tried a half smile.

Once again, Alex's heart broke a little more from Olivia's admission. In those five years, Alex's heart had broken as well. She had suffered the two years in WitSec in a job she hated, in a relationship she couldn't stand, and even with a hair coloring and a wardrobe that she felt no connection to. Then, back in New York she struggled to find the Alexandra Cabot that she had once been, knowing that Olivia had, for certain, moved on without her, and then trying to get over that. Alex knew pain. She knew suffering. She understood exactly what Olivia meant.

"Baby," Alex began, her voice cracking, "We're together now. All those ups and downs have made us stronger, not only independently, but as one. We found each other again and I will _never_ let you go again." Alex cupped the silky tan skin of her neck and pulled her face to hers, hovering briefly, foreheads pressed, their eyes locked before Olivia closed her beautiful brown eyes and sighed the most peaceful, contented sigh Alex had ever heard-wanton, endearing, affectionate—all rolled into one. Alex took the moment to softly press her parted lips into Olivia's, tasting her lips, pressing for the entrance that the detective quickly allowed. Soon, the kiss became heated, almost frenzied, breathless and anticipating…

Olivia pulled away first, slowly, eyes still closed. Once she regained her breath, she whispered, "I am so sorry for yesterday, Alex…I—"

Alex stopped her apology with another kiss, this time it was soft and gentle. Pulling away, she put her hands on the detective's hips. "You don't need to apologize, Liv. "I get it. I get you…" Alex moved her hands to the tops of Olivia's thighs, squeezing firmly.

Olivia moaned and grinned devilishly.

Alex smiled wryly. "Liv, I have a proposition for you during breakfast…"

"Won't that be difficult during breakfast? I mean, the food…kind of messy, but the table would be perfect for it…"

Alex slapped Olivia's leg playfully. "A different proposition, detective."

"Well, what is it?" Olivia was now interested.

"You'll have to wait. How about you go take a shower and change and I'll make us something _simple_ to eat…"

Olivia leaned in for another kiss, "Sounds good," she whispered, moaning as Alex's hands softly gripped her ass. Turning to leave, she said over her shoulder, "I'm suddenly feeling _much_ better…"

Alex smirked and shook her head, watching Olivia's backside as she sashayed away.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

What Alex thought of as a simple breakfast was anything but. Crispy vanilla French toast with powdered sugar, butter and maple syrup, sliced chewy bacon on the side and lattes were waiting when Olivia emerged from her shower clean, fresh, and wearing distressed Levi's and a fitted navy, NYPD tank top. She ran her fingers through her wavy, damp locks as she entered the kitchen, slithering up behind Alex, who was plating the food to bring to the table.

Olivia managed to wrap her arms around the attorney before she picked up the plates. Alex left the lattes and turned in Olivia's arms, wrapping her own arms around the detective's neck.

"I want to make yesterday up to you," Olivia began, taking Alex's trademark frames from her face and setting them on the counter. "I want to make sure you understand how sorry I am and that I never meant to hurt you." She kissed Alex's cheekbone, then down further, planting soft kisses down her jaw line and then neck, sucking that one spot below her ear that made Alex shudder as she simultaneously sank her teeth into that very location.

"Uhhhhh," Alex moaned, trying to find her voice. "I would argue with you but…I have to say, I wouldn't mind being 'made up to'…" Alex moved her hands to Olivia's backside and pulled the brunette even closer, pressed as one.

"The past couple of days have been a whirlwind and I just want to be able to spend time with you," Olivia unbuttoned the top two buttons of Alex's fuchsia silk shirt and then moved the fabric off of her shoulder, planting kisses there.

"And I have absolutely no problem with that…"

Olivia pulled the shirt further off of Alex's shoulder, revealing her pert nipple. "Mmmmm, no bra…perfect…" She leaned in and gently tongued it, eliciting a gasp and then a low moan from her girlfriend.

"As much as I'd like you to continue…" she paused, enjoying the sensations, "…let's eat and then we can pick this up where we left off?"

Olivia stopped her ministrations and looked at Alex, a smug expression on her face. "OK, fine…"

Alex motioned for Olivia to get the coffees.

"Besides…" Alex said as Olivia took the lattes to the table and sat. Alex set the plates on the table. "We have to talk about my proposition." Alex sat.

"There's that word again…" Olivia smiled, placing her napkin in her lap as the women began eating.

Alex grinned. "I think you'll like it…it involves you making it up to me right by the ocean."

"Mmmm?" Olivia tried, eyebrows raised, chewing.

Alex wiped her mouth. "My parents are in Spain right now and will be until May. Their house is empty and we could have it all to ourselves." Alex smiled and placed her hand on Olivia's forearm, trailing light fingers along it.

Olivia shivered and smiled. "All to ourselves, huh?"

Alex nodded, "Just you, me, the ocean air…no interruptions." Alex tucked a lock of wavy hair behind Olivia's ear. "We deserve a little extravagance and relaxation, don't you think?"

Olivia put her fork down and took Alex's hand, laying a soft, lingering kiss on her knuckles. "I think it's a perfect idea."

The women watched the other for a few moments, mutual admiration amongst them, before they began eating again.

Looking down and forking some French toast, Alex asked, "Do you still have that bikini?" She looked up, absolute lust in her darkened eyes.

Olivia smiled, "Sure do…I hope it still fits."

Alex looked Olivia over, "Oh, it'll fit…"

"When do we leave?" Olivia questioned.

"Um," Alex swallowed, "I just have to make some arrangements with the office, tie up some loose ends and then we can head out tomorrow. "Too soon?"

Olivia shook her head as she sipped her coffee. "Not at all. The sooner the better."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

The rest of the morning and afternoon was spent with Alex and Olivia making slow, lazy love without a care in the world. They lay in bed, Olivia talking about being in a bikini or naked the entire time and Alex talked about the different meals she would cook, wearing whatever Olivia wanted her to wear. They would even invite a few friends up on the weekends for dinner. It would be perfect and just what they needed to rekindle their romance and remember why they were meant to be together.


	13. Chapter 13

**I found this beach house in Southampton, NY that looks so much like a place where Alexandra Cabot and her family would live. This was the inspiration, if you care to look…**

**If the first part of the address below doesn't show up to the link, you can Google search 1900 Meadow Lane, Southampton, NY and it's the Corcoran listing.**

** hamptons/Listings/Display/2401615#WebID=34794**

13

The two hour drive was made into a three-hour drive due to coffee breaks, gas station restroom breaks, and selfies taken at various scenic stops along highway I-495 and 27E. Alex's convertible was the perfect vehicle for a scenic ocean route trip and it was the perfect day to drive with the top down.

Olivia unabashedly eyed Alex often as she drove. The blonde looked breathtakingly gorgeous as she sported large framed, black sunglasses and a blue and white silk scarf tied at the neck to keep her hair from whipping in her face. She was wearing a classic pair of white shorts and a navy baby tee. Olivia couldn't help but be reminded of the beautiful Grace Kelly. Alex was a classic beauty, no doubt—from her profile to her full lips and cerulean eyes, she was the most beautiful woman Olivia had ever seen.

The brunette couldn't wait to get there and her giddiness was apparent throughout the trip as she occasionally grabbed Alex's knee, tenderly squeezed her thigh, and stole quick kisses on her exposed neck; but Olivia, knowing reckless driving was nothing to play with, controlled herself temporarily so that Alex could concentrate, especially since Alex was known to drive slightly on the fast side.

Sailing down 27E, Olivia knew from the few times she had been to Southampton with Alex in the past and from certain landmarks along the way, that they were close to the house; but the detective had always kidded, because of its enormity, that it was not a house, it was a _compound_. Alex didn't really care for that word; therefore, Olivia loved to tease her openly and mercilessly about it.

The house was where Alex grew up and was a six bedroom, seven and a half bath two-story classic Hampton beach house. The decorating was old money with a hint of Alex's father's eclectic taste in art splashed throughout. Alex always said that those paintings would be the first things to go when and if she and her brother inherited the house in the future. Olivia and Alex had stayed there alone, together, almost six years ago for a particular Christmas holiday when they both had a rare two weeks off, and it had been every bit romantic and the dream that she knew this visit would be.

Growing up in such an affluent, upper crust town was both a blessing and a curse. Olivia and Alex had never argued about money. Olivia knew that Alex had it. Alex knew modest beginnings that Olivia came from. Somehow, their relationship to money, with money, and how it was spent amongst them was never an issue, never even brought up. Both women simply treated money as a give and take in their relationship, a mutual understanding, taking turns with funds, never questioning or arguing over who would ever pay for what.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex pulled into West Main Street Market where they could do a little grocery shopping before heading to the house. The women exited the car and Alex removed her scarf, shaking her ponytail out as Olivia slipped her arm around the blonde's waist. Alex turned to her and smiled, putting her own arm around Olivia and placing a kiss on her cheek as they walked through the parking lot toward the store.

"This feels good, Liv." Alex said, squeezing the detective's waist.

"It does, Baby…and it's gonna feel even better real soon, too…you just wait. I can't wait to have you in that house all to myself."

Alex peered at Olivia from the corner of her eye, her expression smug. "Oh, yeah? Well, what do you say we make this shopping trip even quicker so we can get to the house?"

"You mean the compound?" Liv chided.

"Ha…ha…," Alex sneered, her voice monotone.

They entered the store and stopped just beyond the doorway. Alex proceeded to tear the grocery list she had so organizationally made ahead of time at the apartment—tedious, beautiful handwriting included—in half. "Divide and conquer…meet you at checkout four in twenty minutes. Deal?"

Olivia smiled and said, "Deal," before kissing the attorney quickly, her competitive side already rearing its head. Olivia got a cart quickly.

Alex stated, "It's not a race, Liv."

"Not to _you_…" Olivia turned her cart and headed towards the aisles that would lead her to the completion of her list.

Twenty minutes later, Olivia was standing at checkout four. When she saw Alex, she looked at her watch and shook her head, tapping the timepiece with her index finger. Alex smirked and brought her cart next to Olivia's, inspecting the contents.

Olivia inquired, "Is everything copacetic for her majesty?"

"Bacon, whole grain bread, coffee—Rice Krispies™, Liv?"

"You just wrote cereal…I like the noises they make. Like they're talking to me…" Olivia joked.

"You have me to talk to you…" Alex said as she continued her perusal of the cart, Olivia faking annoyance at her inspection. The brunette folded her arms facetiously.

"OK," Alex continued, "muffins, bran—good choice—for _you_…"

Olivia mock bowed down to Alex and Alex shoved Olivia playfully as she lost her balance and faltered. "Hey…for _me_?" she whined.

"Romaine, Roma tomatoes, and cucumbers…good job."

"I am glad you are pleased. Now let's checkout so we can get to that compound…" Olivia nuzzled Alex's ear, biting her lobe gently.

"Right on it…"Alex said quickly.

They went through the checkout lane, the young male clerk eyeing the two women as though he were a gift to the female persuasion. He scanned the items, never taking his eyes off of the women. 'Lenny'—or so his nametag stated— was in his early twenties, buff, and tan with piercing green eyes and perfectly gelled hair. A very Guido look about him. In a thick Jersey accent he began, "So, you ladies got big plans here in Southampton?"

Olivia slid up behind Alex and wrapped her arms around her waist, pressed her body tightly against her and kissed her neck softly. "We've got a few plans, _Lenny_."

Lenny's smirk and slow nod said it all. "_Yeah_, you do…" He was totally into it. He handed Olivia back her credit card and she signed the receipt. "You two have a good one." He eyed them both as they got their bags and headed out of the store.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

It was a little after five o'clock when they turned into the graveled, gated drive that would lead them to the house. Olivia had her hand on the side of Alex's neck the entire ride back from the store, her thumb caressing Alex's cheek tenderly. Alex would gaze at her while driving to see pure adoration and contentment in Olivia's eyes and on her face. Alex was ecstatic that they were taking this vacation together and even more overjoyed with how things were going between them. They seemed to be back to their former selves, their former relationship.

Alex put her foot on the brake and turned to Olivia. "Do the honors?" She handed the detective a plastic card with a magnetic strip on one side.

Olivia took the card, smiled, and took off her seatbelt. "But, of course." She got out of the car and slid the card through the reader. The gates began to open slowly, their weight and age creaking with the movement. Olivia got back in the car, closed the door and handed Alex the card back.

They zoomed forward, up the long drive, past the tennis courts on the left and toward the gravel drive outside the front door.

"We're here," Alex chirped, turning the engine off. "Home sweet, childhood, home." She removed her seatbelt and Olivia followed suit. The women exited the car and Alex held out her hand for Olivia to take as they walked down the graveled path to the front door.

Alex had called the Cabot housekeeper of thirty years the day before they left to let her know that they were headed that way. The attorney knew that Kate, who was a native of Manchester, England, would have their linens changed and a few other amenities and comforts arranged by the time they got there. Growing up, Kate was not only Alex's housekeeper, but a wonderful nanny to Alex and her brother, and the blonde adored her like a second mother. She lived in her own guest house on the property and Alex's plan was to give her a small vacation herself so that she and Olivia could be completely alone with their privacy.

Alex rang the doorbell and waited, smiling at Olivia like a giddy schoolgirl. She was practically jumping up and down. "I'm so excited we're here, Liv…" She leaned forward and kissed Olivia softly, their hands still intertwined.

The clicking of the locks was heard and the women pulled away and looked up.

Kate's cheerful, rosy cheeks greeted them as the door flung open wide, her chubby arms embracing Alex first. "Oh, Alexandra! It's so good to see you!" The two women hugged a tight, bone crushing hug and then Alex turned to Olivia.

"You remember Olivia Benson, right Katie?"

"How could I forget? Of course I remember this exotic beauty! But, it's been too long, though, hasn't it?" Kate took Olivia by the shoulders and pulled her into a hug.

Olivia melted into the kindness. "Yes, way too long. Miss Kate."

"Well, don't just stand there, come on inside!" Kate motioned, stepping her stout frame aside so the women could enter.

"We have groceries in the car—" Alex began.

"I'll get them, Baby," Olivia put a hand on her shoulder, smiling. "It'll give you two a chance to get caught up."

"OK, Liv. Thanks." Alex simply beamed, mesmerized by her amazing girlfriend, as the brunette exited the house.

"Well, well. Ms. Alexandra. Looks like what's meant to be has returned…" Kate linked her arm with Alex's as they headed upstairs to the kitchen.

Alex gave Kate a confused look.

Kate explained, "If you love something set it free…if they come back they're yours. If they don't, they never were."

Alex smiled. "Ahhhh, very true."

"So how are things going in the Big Apple?" Kate asked, moving to the stove to take the whistling kettle from the element. She brought it over to a teapot and began pouring it over four teabags.

"Things were rocky for a while, Katie—getting adjusted, trying to fit in again— but they seem as they should be now. Slowly back to normal."

"I can see the gleam in your eyes again, Alexandra—the same gleam that was there all those years ago when you and Miss Olivia were together."

"She makes me happy, Katie…I'm the happiest person I have ever been when I'm with her. Even in rough times, I love her more than anything or anyone I have ever loved in the world. It's almost like I can't help it, it's…like..."

"Love, Alexandra. It's like love, is what it is. Plain and simple. You can't explain love and there is no need. It's just there." Kate placed her hand over Alex's on the counter of the island.

"It's exactly like that, Katie…" Alex said, her eyes beginning to mist.

Olivia breezed up the stairs, looking incredibly sexy in her mid-thigh length cut off jean shorts and black tank top, six grocery bags in tow. Alex took a moment to appreciate her toned, tanned thighs.

"Hey," the brunette breathed as she stepped into the kitchen.

"Oh, goodness, Miss Olivia. All those bags, up those stairs, in one trip? Goodness, put them down here," she motioned to the counter. "In shape, are we?" She chuckled and shook her head. "You young women are full of vim and vigor." She turned to retrieve the kettle and cups to bring them to the table.

Olivia smirked at Alex and mouthed _vim and vigor?_ her brows furrowed.

Alex mouthed the words _shut up_ and then the women walked to the kitchen table to sit.

Kate brought a tray with three cups, creamer, sugar, honey, lemon, the teapot and some small, raspberry thumbprint cookies. She began pouring tea into the cups and handing them to the women.

"So, tell me," Kate began, "How did fate bring you two back together again?"

Alex smiled at Olivia and took this one. "Well, Katie, I was asked to work a case only about five days ago for SVU, which is Liv's squad…" Alex couldn't believe it had only been five days since they had begun working on the case. It seemed like she and Olivia had never parted. "So, we worked on that case and…the rest is history."

"No, no, no you're not getting out of it that easily," Kate informed them with her charming accent. "I need more details. This is the good stuff I don't often hear about. Spill, Miss Alex."

Alex looked at Olivia and raised her eyebrows as if to ask permission to share. Olivia nodded and sipped her tea, reaching for a cookie.

"Well, once the case was over, the next morning, I called Liv and invited her for brunch. We went, talked, spent the rest of the day and the rest of the—"

"Night, just say it," Kate winked.

"OK, and night…and the next morning, Liv was called to the hospital for a case…" Alex looked at Olivia, hesitating.

"It's fine, Al, really. I'm OK." Olivia comforted.

"Long story short, Liv ended up socking an abusive father of a little girl who was not only being abused by her brother, but her father as well. Now, unfortunately or fortunately, Liv's on unpaid leave for a month."

Kate was amazed and slightly in awe, evident by her open-mouthed grin. "You punched him? In the face?"

Olivia held up her gauzed hand. "Proof right here."

"That's impressive, Miss Olivia. Did ya at least knock him out? He went to jail, right?"

Olivia laughed, "No, I didn't knock him out but I am pretty sure I broke his nose and gave him one hell of a shiner…and yes, he's in jail as we speak."

"And your hand?" Kate asked, motioning for Olivia to show her.

"Well… it's started to heal. I keep the gauze fresh and clean to protect it." She unwrapped the loose gauze.

Alex watched as the gauze was removed. She hadn't shown the blonde yet because she had been embarrassed and ashamed. But, seeing it now, Olivia's hand looked painful. Her first, second and third knuckles were raw with the top layer of skin missing. Surrounding the open flesh were a bluish-purplish bruises. It looked like it hurt. Alex wanted to take her hand and kiss the pain away. She looked at Olivia and Olivia looked at her, smiling shyly.

"Well, I'm glad you got the bastard," Kate said charmingly. She stood, taking the full tray with her. "I've changed the sheets in your old bedroom, Alex, and in one of the guest bedrooms downstairs. I didn't know what the arrangements were," she winked. "There are also clean towels in both bathrooms and the pool company came by this morning to make sure the heater is working and everything is ready in case you want to swim. The extra key is on the hook in the butler pantry where it always is and, I didn't cook dinner, per your request, because you said you were going out. Am I missing anything?"

"No, I don't think so…thank you so much, Katie. It means a lot. Now," Alex walked up to Katie and took her hands, "I have a gift for _you_…"

"Oh, really," Kate blushed. "I don't need a gift, Miss Alexandra."

"In three days, if you want it, a plane will take you to Florida and then a cruise ship will stop at the Bahamas, Trinidad and Tobago, Jamaica, and Honduras for a week and a half. All expenses paid."

Kate looked stunned and a bit pale. She clutched the counter for support. Olivia stepped into cop mode and sidled up next to the shaky woman, ready to catch her if need be.

"I—I can't believe it. I would love to go!" She hugged Alex tightly and then threw her arms around Olivia for good measure.

"Great!" Alex beamed. "I can give you the details tomorrow afternoon. How does that sound?"

"It sounds wonderful, Miss Alex. Really. I'll have to thank Mr. and Mrs. Cabot deeply."

"Well, you could but they won't know what you're talking about. The gift is purely from me." Alex smiled and noticed that Olivia was smiling lovingly her. All she wanted to do now was jump the brunette's bones. But first, a classy send off…

"I don't know what to say, Miss Alexandra. What a wonderful surprise."

"Your reaction and happiness is enough," Alex stated.

"Well, I guess I'd better get packing, then…" She began walking down the stairs to the front door, grabbing her purse from the chair next to it. "I'll see you tomorrow afternoon."

"I'll call you with a time, OK?"

"OK, then, dear. See you tomorrow. Good night, Miss Olivia."

"Goodnight, Miss Kate. See you tomorrow."

They closed the door after making sure Kate made it past the tennis courts.

Alex locked the door and turned around to find Olivia standing even closer than she had been seconds earlier.

Olivia slithered her arms around Alex and began kissing her neck. "What a wonderful gift you gave to her," she said in between kisses. She found her way to the hem of Alex's blue baby tee and lightly danced her fingers along her toned stomach. Her mouth found Alex's once again and the kiss turned frenzied, heated as their tongues pushed for ownership. Alex suddenly found herself pushed against the wall next to the door, her shirt being tugged to be removed.

Breathlessly, Alex whispered, eyes closed, "Let's take it to the bedroom…kind of…weird right here."

Alex was the farthest thing from shy about their intimacy but she had regulations at her childhood home. Even though they had virtually been guaranteed their privacy, she was still hesitant.

Olivia stated, "No problem" as began walking back to the hallway and then right to Alex's old bedroom, holding the blonde's hand as she followed. Once in the hallway, they were all over each other once again, walking sideways, kissing, hands on clothing, tugging, removing…

Alex reached around Olivia as they entered the bedroom, shirts having already been discarded along the way, and unclasped her bra, letting it fall to the floor, her hands immediately feeling the warm, soft flesh of her breasts beneath her palms. Olivia moaned into the air as Alex's mouth found a pebbled nipple and began tonguing it savagely, biting lightly and eliciting a hiss from her detective.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Olivia's hands found their way to the back waistband of Alex's thigh-length shorts and she slipped her palms down beneath her underwear, grabbing to the two globes of perfect flesh in her hands and kneading them firmly.

"God, Alex…I want you…what you do to me…" Olivia stopped Alex from traveling further down the brunette's body, as she was on her way to kneeling in front of the detective. Olivia guided her back to a standing position and shook her head. "I can wait, though. You, on the other hand…have been a very patient girl." She kissed Alex's smiling mouth. She pulled Alex's shorts and panties down and the attorney stepped out of them. "You have been very generous to Kate." She kissed Alex's neck. "You have been _very_ good to me…" She kissed her breast through her white lace bra, biting her nipple lightly as Alex grabbed the back of Olivia's head to keep her there. "And it's time…" Olivia lightly pushed Alex to sit, "…that I let you know…" Alex lay down and moved her body up toward the pillows. Olivia removed the rest of her clothing and then followed and hovered over her. "…how much I appreciate it." Olivia trailed her fingers in between Alex's breasts, unclasping the bra in the front, separating the fabric to the sides and then lightly brushing her fingertips over satiny skin of her breasts before cupping her firm, round breast in her left hand, kissing the attorney hard. Alex moaned her need as Olivia used her knee to separate Alex's thighs and then gently pressed the firmness of her thigh into her core, Alex gasping with need.

Olivia could feel her thigh becoming coated with Alex's excitement as she continued to thrust into the blonde. This only made the detective hornier. Every time she pushed, Alex moaned and pulled Olivia closer, her gripping hands bringing her ass closer.

"Liv," Alex gasped. "I need you…"

"I know, baby. I'm here…" Olivia continued thrusting, as she kissed her neck and pleasured her breasts.

"I want you inside..." She tried as she lifted her bottom up to make more contact with Olivia's thigh.

Olivia moved her body down and licked Alex's juices that were flowing from her core. The detective ran her tongue along Alex's slit and then began ministering light flicks to her clit, causing Alex to clutch the brunette's shoulders.

"More, Liv. More…"

Olivia continued her assault on her clit as she slipped one finger easily inside her girlfriend.

"More, baby. I want you to fill me."

Olivia slipped another, then another finger inside of Alex as she began pumping in and out, her excitement dripping from her hand. Alex wiggled against Olivia's hand as she tried to make further contact, driving her hips towards Olivia's thrusting fingers. Olivia placed her mouth, once again, on Alex's clit, moaning at how turned on she, herself was, and Alex came undone underneath her. Alex began panting, her eyes opened wide and then clenched shut as she tensed just before her orgasm came crashing down, walls clenching around Olivia's fingers, soaking Olivia's arm with Alex's love.

As Alex came down and after her aftershocks subsided, Olivia climbed back up to face level with her girlfriend. Olivia lay next to her as Alex reached out, eyes still closed, but smiling. She opened her eyes and ran her finger around Olivia's waiting nipple, watching as it hardened instantly. Olivia bit her bottom lip and smiled, but grabbed the ADA's hand. "That's all good and nice, but…" She kissed Alex's fingers, taking them into her mouth and sucking briefly before kissing them again. "I'm not done with you, counselor."


	14. Chapter 14

14

Olivia smiled, just waking from a nap, as she lay there on her stomach, limbs sprawled, hair over her face. She felt like she shouldn't be this content but her body and mind couldn't deny the relaxation flowing throughout her being, her love for the sexy attorney unparalleled. She stretched and let out a squeak, her body sore from a session of sexual acrobatics. She was actually sore—everywhere. Her lips were swollen and tender from kissing, her abs were sore from holding various positions, her arms from pleasuring Alex, and her own walls were overspent from the numerous times that her girlfriend had made her orgasm. Olivia was happy that, when Alex had gone home the day before to pack some of her own things, she had included the purple plastic toy from her night stand, but Olivia was now most certainly feeling the ache, at least after the fact.

It was a wonderful ache, though.

Olivia grinned again and reached over for Alex but found her side empty. Olivia raised her upper half off the bed and looked around. She spotted Alex on the veranda, sitting in a white Adirondack chair, sipping from a turquoise mug and looking out across the ocean. She looked so peaceful, sitting in her baby blue satin robe, long, elegant legs outstretched and ankles crossed. She had a slight smile on her face, as well.

Olivia got up and used the off-white throw at the foot of the bed to wrap around her naked body before she walked to the screen door. She looked over at Alex, who was still lost in thought and still smiling. Quietly, so as not to startle her, Olivia said, "Hey, there."

Alex looked up at Olivia as the detective opened the screen and exited, taking a seat in the matching chair next to her girlfriend. "Hey, yourself…" Alex grinned smugly. The attorney reached to her right and then handed Olivia a matching blue mug with what smelled like the Earl Grey they had bought earlier. Alex gazed at Olivia as she touched her own lips with her forefinger, biting it gently and grinning. She began shaking her head.

"Something wrong, counselor?" Olivia asked as she stared ahead at the blue expanse of the Atlantic. She took a sip of tea and then looked at Alex.

Alex reached for Olivia's hand and Olivia placed hers in the blonde's. "Nothing is wrong, at all…in fact, everything is too right, Liv. I'm afraid I'm gonna wake up." She looked down at their hands and began caressing Olivia's palm with her thumb. "It's real, right?"

"Yes, Baby. It's real." Olivia brought Alex's hand to her mouth and kissed it, tonguing it lightly.

Alex closed her eyes and let out a contented moan. "You keep that up we won't make our eight-thirty reservations for dinner."

"Who says we need to keep the reservations?" Olivia questioned, her hand now traveling up Alex's arm and underneath her robe sleeve. Olivia found a pebbled nipple and began rubbing circles around it with her fingertip.

"Jesus, Liv," Alex groaned as she leaned her head back against the headrest.

"Besides…" Olivia began, as she put her mug down, got up from the chair, and let the throw covering her fall to the ground. She knelt in front of Alex's feet, dancing her tanned fingers on silk-covered knees before moving the fabric aside and placing hands on pale, soft skin, "…didn't you buy all that seafood at the market?" Olivia leaned forward and began tonguing her way up Alex's inner thighs, Alex spreading her legs involuntarily as she watched Olivia with heavy, lascivious lids. "We have plenty to eat…right here…" she kissed her way further up and hovered just millimeters from Alex's center, "…at least _I_ do, anyway…"

"_Fuck_," Alex whispered, as Olivia's tongue entered her warmth. Alex grabbed Olivia's hair, her fingers gripping it firmly as Olivia began long sweeping motions with her skilled tongue, in and out, her thumb lightly brushing Alex's clit. Alex gasped underneath Olivia, her grip becoming tighter in her hair, her moans increasing in volume.

"Alexandra?" a voice questioned—a voice that seemed to be in the distance to Olivia. Olivia continued pleasuring Alex, knowing that she was close to climax from her panting and they way she was saying Olivia's name repeatedly.

"Alexandra Cabot?" the voice was louder now.

"Wh…what the…f—?" Alex opened her eyes and Olivia stopped, looking up at Alex and licking her lips.

Like lightning, Alex was up and standing, eyes wide, backing up as though she had seen a rattlesnake. She hastily pulled her robe closed and retied the belt. "Mr. Wexley!" She yelped, shoving Olivia in all her naked glory toward the door to go inside.

Once Olivia got inside and closed the screen door, her giggling erupted and her body convulsed with laughter, her knees weak beneath her. She sat on the bed and rolled backward, placing a pillow over her loud cackling, as she rolled her self into a chuckling ball.

_Poor Alex_. Whoever Mr. Wexley was, hopefully his eyesight and hearing was bad or else he would have gotten an eye as well as an earful.

Alex entered the bedroom from the balcony and closed the glass door. She looked absolutely on edge and, if possible, two shades paler, yet her cheeks were bright crimson. "Oh my God, Liv!" She drew her lips inward, trying not to smile. "I can't believe it! That was Mr.—"

"Wexley?" Olivia interrupted, her lips trembling as she withheld her own smile.

"_Yes_!" Alex said, exasperated. She began hastily throwing on her shorts from earlier and her bra and baby tee. "Apparently my father spoke with Kate and then he called Mr. Wexley about coming to check on the hot water heater to make sure it's working for us. He's been our handyman slash groundskeeper since I was little and he's also my father's _really good friend_!"

Olivia covered her mouth with her hand, her smile behind it, her body shaking.

Alex glared at her. "It is _so_ not funny, Liv…" She put her hair back in her ponytail holder and then shoved Olivia back on the bed, pinning her down and hovering over her. "I am going to burst—you had me _right…there_…Jesus!" She got up and began walking towards the door. "He needs to come in and check it out. It should only take a few minutes, but…I have to be a good hostess…"

"Oh, you _are_ a good hostess, Alex. Trust me…" Olivia said to the ceiling, still lying down from where Alex had pushed her.

As Alex walked down the hallway, Olivia could hear her say something about finishing what she started.

Olivia would be sure to remember that.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex headed to the back door where the pool and garden were, on the ocean front side, shaking her head and not believing the chances. Her core and lower lips were pulsating and sopping wet from her near miss. She could feel the flush in her cheeks and the sweat along her forehead and upper lip from her sexual frustration and panic. The door where Mr. Wexley was standing was directly below her bedroom veranda where she and Liv had been; she, herself, making all kinds of erotic noises. Hopefully his hearing was bad. Maybe his vision was also poor, as well. After all, he was in his early eighties. He must have lost _some_ of his senses by now.

She took a deep breath and opened the door, Mr. Wexley standing on the bottom step, smiling. "Mr. Wexley…" she began, walking down the steps to greet him, "…so good to see you."

They embraced and Mr. Wexley held her by the waist, looking her over as he always did. "Beautiful as ever Alexandra. You haven't changed…."

"Neither have you, Mr. Wexley," she smiled, still nervous about what he might have heard or seen. "How have you been?" she asked as they began walking up the steps into the house, Mr. Wexley following slowly, his elderly joints moving with more difficulty than last time Alex had seen him a year ago.

It pained Alex to see him like this, to know that the people in her life that she once considered the heroes, the invincible adults, were now aging and deteriorating before her eyes.

Mr. Wexley followed Alex upstairs into the kitchen and he took a seat at the kitchen table. "Can I get you something to drink? Coffee? Tea? Something harder?" Alex stood, waiting for his response.

Mr. Wexley considered for a moment. "I'll take a brandy, if you have it."

"I'm pretty sure we have a brandy. Coming right up." Alex chirped as she walked towards the stairway where the wet bar was. She saw Olivia peeking around the corner downstairs. She motioned for her to come up. Alex noted that she had changed into a pair of white jeans and a fitted olive tank top, her feet bare. She had obviously taken a quick shower and she looked incredible, her damp hair now clipped in a twist. The brunette bounced effortlessly up the stairs.

Once she got to the top, she sidled up next to Alex. "What are we doing?" she whispered and watched as Alex got ice from the mini fridge under the bar and filled a glass with ice before filling it with two-shot's worth of the amber liquid.

"_We_ are being social. Come with me. I want to introduce you," Alex beamed, smiling at Olivia. Alex took the glass in her left hand and took Olivia's left hand.

They entered the kitchen and Alex pulled Olivia next to her, still gripping her hand.

Alex set a cocktail napkin and then the glass on top of it in front of the elderly man.

Mr. Wexley smiled when he saw Olivia and he stood. "And who is this beautiful creature?" He reached out for her hand.

Olivia smiled and offered her hand, which Mr. Wexley took and kissed before gazing back into her eyes.

Alex offered, "This is Olivia Benson. She's my girlfriend, Mr. Wexley." Alex waited for some kind of reaction from her admittance, although she received none from the gentle, old man.

The only reaction that was had was Mr. Wexley's eyes tearing up. Alex looked at Olivia and Olivia at Alex. Olivia shook her head, not understanding either.

The old man sat and took a sip of brandy as Olivia and Alex took their seats on either side of him. "You're probably wondering why I got so emotional seeing your Olivia…" Mr. Wexley began, looking at Alex, "…it's just that, she reminds me of my Emma, God rest her soul." He looked at Olivia. "It's uncanny. Like you've captured her soul…you have the same beautiful brown eyes…" He looked at her, studying as though trying to convince himself it wasn't really her.

Olivia shifted and looked at Alex. "She must have meant the world to you, Mr. Wexley. "I'm so sorry for your loss." Olivia put her hand on his back briefly.

Alex smiled at her and then tried to change the mood. "So, you need to check on the water heater right?"

"Yes," Mr. Wexley cleared his throat. "It's an old one and your father said that in December it wasn't acting right but he said to wait and see in a few months how it was doing. Katie called me after speaking to him and now I'm here to check on it. If it needs replacing, it should only take a couple of hours and we could do it tomorrow." He downed the rest of his drink.

"Can I get you another drink?" Alex offered.

"Oh, no, no…I wasn't even supposed to have that one," he kidded as he stood arduously.

Olivia made a face at Alex that said _whoops_, before the two women stood.

Mr. Wexley headed to the butler's pantry to check on the water heater. Olivia brought his glass to the sink and emptied the ice, washing it with the soapy sponge and rinsing it before setting it in the drying rack, obviously pensive.

Alex came up behind her. "You OK?"

Olivia smiled, "Yeah…poor guy…you can see how much he loved her…" Olivia smiled and looked at Alex's lips before planting a soft, quick kiss on the attorney's parted mouth. "Oh, and, the water is hot," Olivia shared.

"Oh, good." Alex looked fixedly at Olivia's mouth, biting her bottom lip.

"Well, everything seems OK," Mr. Wexley began. "It seems you have hot water right now so, you let me know if it gives you any problems. How long are you staying this time, Alexandra?"

"I'm not sure yet…probably a couple of weeks." The three headed down the stairs and then to the back door.

"OK, you let me know if you have any problems with anything around the house, OK?"

Alex embraced Mr. Wexley and then he turned to Olivia, taking her left hand into both of his own—her bandaged hand was behind her back—and he looked into her eyes, searching them. "You take care, Olivia. It was a true pleasure meeting you." He kissed her hand once again, turned, and headed down the stairs. He stopped and turned back momentarily. "Also, keep an eye out for the McGregor's cat. I think she's in heat. Makes a terrible screaming sound. I heard her earlier when I was out here ringing the bell."

Olivia nudged Alex and grinned sheepishly.

Alex nudged her back and called out, "Will do, Mr. Wexler."

He walked past the pool and to the right, disappearing into the darkness.

Alex slipped her arm around Olivia's waist as Olivia continued to watch the spot where Mr. Wexley disappeared. "Hey…" she tried, noting Olivia was, once again, lost in thought.

Olivia shook her head slightly. She looked at Alex and smiled, turning into her embrace.

"He's right, you know…" Alex husked, her arms around Olivia's neck, the brunette's hands on Alex's waist.

"Yeah, what's that?" Olivia rubbed her nose against Alex's.

"You do have the most gorgeous brown eyes…" Alex leaned in for a slow, sensual kiss, her tongue lingering on Olivia's bottom lip, sucking it lightly.

Olivia moaned as Alex's hands moved down and squeezed the brunette's ass. "Now, what was that about me finishing what I started?"

The women walked into the house, Alex eager to have Olivia finish what she had begun.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: I make a reference to Facebook; what I wanted to say was "selfie" and Instagram when Alex is talking but, come to find out, Facebook started in 2004 and Instagram not until 2010, so I had to reference MySpace and Facebook. Takin' it back to the old school!**

15

The ride back from the Francis S. Gabreski Airport on Saturday afternoon was spent with Olivia driving. Olivia offered to drive so that Alex could, as Olivia put it, "calm her nerves" after the attorney had a slight altercation with a woman at the airline check-in. Although Alex had no problem paying for a bag that was packed over the weight limit, it was the principle of the matter. When the hefty, middle-aged woman named Marge weighed Katie's bag it had been one-point zero seven pounds over the weight limit for checked baggage and, therefore, according to airline regulations, was told there would be an overweight baggage fee. Alex argued that the suitcase, itself weight at least five pounds on its own and therefore the weight was acceptable.

The woman behind the counter unrelentingly continued to argue with the ADA until she saw Marge's eyes shift to something behind her. Alex turned and watched as Olivia breezed through the automatic doors after parking the car, her sexy tight faded jeans hugging her curves. The brunette came up behind Alex and as soon as the woman saw Olivia, she stopped talking, mouth agape. The flirt was apparently on. Out came Marge's goo goo eyes and flirtatious smile as she adjusted her blonde permed mop and blushed. Suddenly, there had never been a problem with the bag, there was nothing further to discuss, and within moments, Katie was boarding her flight, not a dime lost, as Alex continued to silently brood over the injustice of it all.

With Olivia now driving, it was Alex's turn to admire her lover with complete abandon. After dropping Katie off at the airport for her trip, they had decided they would take the ocean view ride back, along the scenic coast.

Now that they were heading back into Southampton, Alex watched Olivia as she drove, the wind blowing her golden brown waves behind her, her brown eyes concealed by aviator sunglasses beautifully arched brows just so, her full lips pursed slightly in thought. Alex's eyes moved down to her collarbone, her dainty gold necklaces catching the sunlight as the glowing orange sun sat lower on the horizon. The white sleeveless button-down blouse she wore accentuated her tanned assets, cleavage perched just inside of the parting of the fabric, and Alex watched as the brunette's arms flexed on the steering wheel. My God, she was getting turned on again.

Olivia turned briefly to look at her and then looked back ahead at the road, smiling sweetly. "You OK?" she questioned softly.

"Yeah…I'm fine." Alex placed her hand on the soft jeans fabric of Olivia's knee. "I had a right to be upset, right? I mean, the fee was unjustified and greedy," Alex offered.

Olivia smiled, still watching the road. She nodded slowly. "I am completely with you. They should have let it slide." Olivia took Alex's hand and, still watching the road, brought it to her mouth, kissing it softly.

"You hungry, Babe? We haven't eaten since breakfast and it's…" Alex glanced at the dash clock, raising her sunglasses to see more clearly, "…almost 4:30. There's a small seafood bar up ahead. They have fresh seafood, cooked to order, and local beers." Alex began squeezing Olivia's shoulder, massaging it lightly.

She looked at Alex, "Sounds good. I could go for some crab cakes right now. Are theirs' any good?"

"They're some of the best I've ever had," Alex husked. "They also have over one-hundred micro brewed and imported beers."

Alex knew that Olivia would feel comfortable with the casualness of jeans and a beer and Alex appreciated that her girlfriend could pull it off and be confident with both ends of the fashion spectrum. However, when Alex thought of Olivia's sexy, feminine side, all dressed up, it turned Alex on like nothing else. The first time Alex saw Olivia dressed up for their first date years ago, the detective was in a tight dress, her muscular tanned calves exposed, four inch heels on, hair soft and sexy, the attorney thought she had died and entered Heaven. At the same time, on the opposite side, even when the brunette donned soft hole-ridden Levi's, a tight white tank with a loose flannel shirt over it, flip flops on her tanned, pedicured feet, that look could do it for Alex just as well. There wasn't a side to Olivia that Alex didn't admire as far as physicality went.

"Up here, Main Street Seafood… see the sign? Turn in…"

"Yep," Olivia slowed down and turned into the parking lot.

It must have been happy hour because there was hardly an empty space. They had to drive around the entire parking lot three times before someone finally pulled out and they glided into the space.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

They walked through the parking lot to the restaurant. The establishment was located on the shore of Cooper's Beach in Southampton Village, right at the water's edge. The hostess led the women through the crowded restaurant where most people were perched on stools at the bar or at booths and tables in the bar area. Olivia guided Alex through the bodies, her hand on the small of the blonde's back, as they walked through the busy restaurant. They received many open stares and gawks from the patrons, men and women alike. Requesting to sit outside, with a view of the ocean, they were led to a small table for four, overlooking the waves licking at the shore, just feet away.

They sat corner-wise from each other, both facing the water and looked on as the frothy waves broke against the sand. Olivia put her hand on top of Alex's on the table and squeezed.

"It's crowded here," Olivia said, watching Alex, hoping her blood pressure had lowered since the airport.

"I think there was a game on in the bar—tennis finals?" Alex tried, smiling. "I have no idea."

"It's OK," Olivia whispered, "it's nice out here…" She looked back at the water. "Peaceful." She turned back to Alex. "How are you doing? Better?"

"Yeah…I guess the lawyer in me wanted to see the justice in what happened. If Katie had been by herself, she probably would have just paid for it. That wouldn't have been right. Anyway…" She took a deep breath and turned her hand to interlock fingers with Olivia's, "…it's over now. Katie's on her flight to Florida. We are finally alone."  
"Are we?" Olivia smirked. "Last thing we need is another creeper lurking on the property while I'm buck naked, my head in places that are hard to explain to an eighty—"

Alex leaned in and kissed Olivia, stopping her from her thought. "We are totally and completely alone. We have all the privacy we want. No more interruptions…" She kissed Olivia again. "I promise."

A clearing of a throat was heard behind them and the women pulled away. "Are you ladies ready for drink orders?" The waitress was in her early twenties, blonde, petite and obviously had no time for this.

"Uh, yeah…" Alex began. "Can we get two of your house blonde ales in frosted glasses?"

The waitress turned on her heel and walked away.

"I guess that was a yes?" Olivia offered.

"She's probably very privileged and spoiled," Alex offered. "She probably only has this job because her parents are making her pay for her phone or she's working off her tanning membership to teach her some lesson about finances. I have known many people that have come out of this area with that mindset. Upper crust money, set in their ways, traditional, but uptight. The younger people that grow up here are, for the most part, self-centered. It's all about spending daddy's money, getting high and drunk on the schooner, and taking as many near-naked pics as possible and posting them on Facebook or MySpace."

Olivia nodded, "And you? You grew up here. How did you turn out so wonderful?" She smiled.

Alex smiled and began rubbing Olivia's forearm. "Liv, it was such a different time twenty years ago. We still had cameras with film that you had to manually rewind when you got to the end of the roll, and flip phones where you had to pull the antenna out yourself, and books with pages you actually had to turn and could put on your bookshelf. It was less populated and values were different. Neighbors knew neighbors."

Yeah, I came out of here with a good head on my shoulders and fairly open-minded, but that had a lot to do with my parents. They instilled culture and an appreciation for working for a dollar and saving for a rainy day. They gave me the arts in the form of ballet and the theatre and the symphony. We traveled and they exposed us to the world and its beauty. But my parents made us work for things. My brother and I found out there weren't many hand outs in the Cabot family. We always knew we had money but my parents were very selective about when to give it to us and under what circumstances."

Olivia gazed at Alex, an even greater appreciation for the blonde goddess sitting next to her. "God, I want to make out with you so badly right now." Olivia put her hand on Alex's upper thigh, clawing at the denim material. "I don't know if you could be any more perfect. Your mind, your nature, and your generosity coupled with your beautiful body…" Olivia licked her lips. "You are _literally_ driving me crazy right now."

Alex continued to trace patterns on Olivia's arm, while the brunette squeezed Alex's thigh possessively.

"Here are your beers," the waitress said unenthusiastically.

The women returned their limbs to their own spaces.

"Are you ready to order?" the girl whose nametag said _Heather_ asked, sighing heavily. The waitress stared out across the water, obviously wishing she was somewhere else.

"You know, Heather," Olivia began, "I think we're going to need another couple of minutes."

"Of course you are." Heather turned again and walked to a patron at another table that was motioning to her at the far end of the patio.

Olivia's mouth was wide, a disbelieving smile on her face. She absolutely despised dealing with haughty teens as she had to do on many occasions in her line of work.

"Let it go, Liv. She's not worth it." Alex looked at Olivia and sipped her beer. "I told you…privileged."

Olivia shook her head and looked at her menu. "So, you said the crab cakes are good?"

"Yep. They use jumbo lump crab meat from freshly-caught crabs. They're delicious. How do you like the beer?"

"It's good…" Olivia took a sip. "I can taste the honey and citrus."

"Good taste buds." Alex winked.

Olivia leaned in, lowering her voice. "And _you_…taste like marshmallows and vanilla," Olivia husked.

"Really? Marshmallows, huh?"

"I can't get enough…" Olivia could feel her cheeks burning hot, her core pulsating as she thought of Alex's thighs pressed against the sides of her head. Olivia took a napkin and blotted her forehead and upper lip.

"You OK, detective?" Alex smirked.

"I just need a second," Olivia looked out beyond the expanse of blue in front of her, willing her mind and body to settle down. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, turning back to Alex. "OK…better," she smiled.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

A cool, crisp breeze blew through the patio and Olivia reached up to her hair, lifting it off of her neck as she let the breeze circulate and cool her damp skin. Alex tilted her head and leaned back, hands folded on her belly as she watched her girlfriend. What a breathtakingly gorgeous beauty Liv was. The brunette had no idea how incredibly stunning she was. Alex watched her mouth as she licked her lips after sipping the frothy beer, Alex wishing that pink tongue was in many, many other places at that moment. The brunette's hands were feminine yet strong, a light blush color adorning her nails, her tanned slender fingers incredibly skilled and flexible when they needed to be. Her bandage was now off of her hand and she only had slight bruising and a couple of scabs that were visible. Alex's gaze moved to Olivia's hair which always looked so touchable, always smelled so clean and feminine, the softness of those locks as they brushed across Alex's breasts…

Her ass in those jeans was a sight, as well. In comparison to five years ago, her backside was the most well-defined Alex had ever seen it, the flesh smooth and soft, the firmness bitable and squeezable. A button on her shirt had, unbeknownst to the detective, come undone and Alex noted her lacy, nude demi cup bra peeking out, Olivia's bosom overflowing the top, her warm soft breasts waiting to be kissed and licked…

"Now are you ready?" Heather was back.

Alex's glazed eyes focused back on Olivia's, as she tried to concentrate on what she was going to order. "Yes, we are. Liv?"

"Well, Heather, I'll have the jumbo crab cakes and a side salad with the lemon vinaigrette." She turned to Alex, "Babe?"

Alex cleared her throat. "I'll have the grilled halibut with a side salad and the lemon vinaigrette, as well."

The waitress turned to leave.

Heather?" Olivia questioned.

The waitress looked puzzled, "How do you know my name?"

Olivia's face dropped and then she brought her lips inward, trying not to smile. "It's on your name tag…Heather." Olivia pointed.

"Oh…yeah," Heather said, nonchalantly and then left the table.

"Are you serious?" Olivia questioned, her eyes wide. "Did that just happen?" Olivia decided not to ask for a couple of waters. She was afraid she might confuse Heather further.

"I'm afraid so…" Alex laughed and swigged the last of her beer, placing the mug down. She closed her eyes and willed the images of fantasizing about her girlfriend away. There was no denying it, though. She was horny. Being in the same vicinity as Olivia, smelling her hair and perfume as the cool air blew, had that effect.

Heather came back to the table. "There are two guys that want to buy you both a drink." She said, absolutely no inflection in her voice. "Those two over there." She turned and pointed as two _boys_—because that's what they were—held up their own beer mugs in a sort of cheer. The guys smiled, looked at each other, and then clinked glasses.

Alex began, "Tell them thank you but no—"

"Tell them we would _love_ another drink," Olivia interrupted. "This could be fun."

"Liv…" Alex warned, smirking.

"Well, they're not going to get far with us…come on…keep an old woman young."

"Jesus you're not only _not_ old, you're incorrigible."

Heather intervened, "Some guys like cougars."

Olivia flared her nostrils and narrowed her eyes at Heather before smiling at Alex. "Just follow my lead."

Alex shook her head, smiling.

Heather asked, "OK, so what can I get you, then?"

"Why don't you surprise us with your favorite flavor of beer."

"I don't drink beer. I drink Cosmos."

"Of course you do," Alex retorted.

"Just give us whatever beer they're having." Olivia said as she motioned for the guys to come to their table.

Alex was slightly anxious. Olivia was too good at this, too comfortable. Alex knew that Olivia had had her share of dating and flirting with men, but it was just intimidating to see it up close and personal while simultaneously an incredible turn on. The sexy flirt in her girlfriend had just kicked it into high gear.

The guys came up to their table, beers in hand. "Ladies," the taller one said, his voice deep.

Both men had madras shorts, polo shirts, and topsiders on. They couldn't have been older than twenty-three.

"Gentlemen," Olivia began. "I'm Brittney and this is Trixie."

"I'm Chris and this is Todd," The taller one with black curly hair said and the four shook hands. "May we?" Chris questioned as he motioned to the seat.

"Be our guests." Olivia took the last sip from her beer just as Heather approached with the new beers.

Heather took the old glasses and Olivia held up the new one, Alex and the men following suit.

"To partying like it's nineteen ninety-one," Olivia cheered and then took a gulp of beer. She swallowed and then began coughing. "What _is _that?"

Alex patted her on the back soothingly.

"It's micro brewed Sriracha stout ale. Isn't it great?" Todd finally spoke.

"It's great if you don't need the first layer of your tongue, Todd." Olivia's eyes were watering, her mouth open and panting.

Alex laughed and Olivia gave her a look that said _you just wait_…

"So, boys…what is it that you do?" Olivia leaned back and crossed her legs, Chris watching her every move, his eyes seemed to be glued on her breasts and hips.

Chris spoke first, "I just graduated from NYU with a degree in international business. My next step is to go into international law. Right now I am taking a year off to surf around the world."

"Nice, Chris. I'll bet you're in shape," Olivia sipped her beer and looked at Chris' torso, as though waiting to see it.

"I do what I can. Surfing keeps me in shape. You should come watch us one morning. Me and Todd are out there every morning at six-thirty, rain or shine."

"Maybe we'll do that, Chris. Trixie here is an attorney, so if you have any questions about the bar, she's your girl…"

Todd interjected, staring at Alex, "You two are really hot." He was a man of few, incredibly insightful, words.

Alex felt extremely uncomfortable with Todd salivating as he continued to stare at her body as though she were naked, his eyes fixated below her neck.

Chris asked Olivia, "What is it that _you_ do?"

Olivia opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted by Chris, "I know, let me guess." He looked her over, tapping his finger over his mouth. "I'm gonna say that you're…an actress."

Olivia feigned shock. "Wow! How did you guess? That's amazing. Isn't it, Trix?"

"Why don't you two come surfing with us tomorrow morning? We can give you a lesson," Todd offered.

"Oh, Chris. I think we should leave that to the kids like you. I, personally, don't think I am young enough to surf. I might break a hip."

Chris looked confused. "What do you mean?"

"Chris, honey, I am pretty sure I could have gone to school with your mother." She looked at Alex. "Now, Trixie here, might be closer to your age range." She smiled at her girlfriend facetiously.

"Thanks, Brit," Alex mumbled.

"Hey, we're all about the cougars," Chris tried, smirking as he scooted his chair closer to Olivia and leaned in. "It's hard to find cougars as sexy as you two." He leaned in as though smelling Olivia.

Olivia took her glass into her hands and looked at Alex, smiling. "If there's any cougar here, it's me to _her_." Olivia put her glass back down and put her hand on Alex's knee and squeezed before she traveled upward and began massaging, her hand moving dangerously close to Alex's crotch. "He must be psychic, Babe. An actress…" Olivia leaned over and kissed Alex's exposed neck, lingering just long enough, sucking her skin for good measure. The brunette was obviously ready to end this charade before it began. She pulled away slightly. "…_and_ straight…that's two incorrect psychic predictions, Chris. I am neither." She looked at Alex, her expression becoming serious before leaning in and planting a sensual kiss on Alex's waiting lips. The kiss turned heated, mouths searching, tongues dancing.

By the time Olivia pulled away, her eyes closed, both women were breathlessly panting. Olivia grinned at Alex and then they both looked at the boys.

By that point, the two guys' mouths were hanging open, virtual drool running down their chins. They looked at each other and then back at Alex and Olivia.

"We are _so_ down with that," Todd snickered, smiling and obviously not believing his luck.

"Well, boys, I hate to tell you but…_we_ are not so down with that."

Heather brought their food and set the plates in front of the women and then, once again, silently walked away.

"Thanks for the drinks, Chris and Todd, but she and I are together…_forever_." Olivia looked at Alex who was smiling.

Alex put her hand on Olivia's. "And nothing is going to change that."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO


	16. Chapter 16

16

"Babe?" Olivia called from the bathroom.

"Yeah?" Alex called from the study across the hall from Olivia. She had been looking through the bookshelves in her parents' study for some sort of trashy, mindless, easy beach novel to read while she sat under the umbrella on the sand in front of the house as her bronzed girlfriend enjoyed the rays.

Alex knew her skin and knew that the most she could spend was a couple of hours in the sun, even with SPF 50 slathered all over her. She knew it wasn't much fun for Olivia but she would rather be safe than hurting for the remainder of their stay. Being so fair, her dermatologist had told her on many occasions that one really bad burn increased her chances at getting skin cancer in some form and she had already been burned too many careless times in her youth to count.

Olivia, on the other hand, could spend a mere five minutes in the sun and develop an enviably tawny color. The brunette emerged from the bathroom and came into the study where Alex was on the floor, legs in front of her in a V, reading the back cover of several paperbacks.

Alex looked up, her breath catching in her throat, as she watched her girlfriend adjust her navy string bikini underneath her sheer white sarong.

"It still just covers the unmentionables, Al…" She pulled at the top triangles of fabric, willing them to cover her bulbous breasts.

Alex stood, her eyes not leaving Olivia's body. "You look…" She shook her head, her mouth open but at a loss for words. "…absolutely gorgeous." Alex reached around Olivia and grabbed her perfect ass in her hands, pulling her close, as far as she could be pressed. She leaned in for a kiss, feeling Olivia's hot breath on her mouth first before pressing her lips to the brunette's soft fullness.

"Well, then…" Olivia rasped. "I guess you still like it."

"Good thing our particular stretch of sand doesn't get too many visitors or else we might have to alert the neighbors.

"Is it that risqué?" Olivia questioned, worry evident on her face. She began moving the fabric around once again, willing it to be bigger. "I think it covered more on top before…"

"Oh, to have such a problem," Alex chided.

Olivia sneered playfully at the blonde.

"Honey, it's a bikini. I think the only problem is that most women can't fill it out like you can. You might have some jealousy but at least _I'm_ going to enjoy the show…that's for sure. Apparently, there's been no Ben & Jerry's for you over the past few years, huh?"

"Those men are evil," Olivia smirked. "Four servings in a container, my ass…"

"I'd like to smear it on your ass and then lick it off slowly." Alex kissed the brunette again and then squeezed Olivia's backside firmly.

"Maybe we can do that later…?" Olivia questioned, grinning, eyebrows wiggling.

"I think we can arrange that…" Alex answered looking down at Olivia's cleavage, "…and _those_ are mine." She kissed the tops of Olivia's breasts tenderly, "All mine."

"All yours, Babe." Olivia leaned in for another hot, searing kiss. Pulling away, she smiled and stroked Alex's hair before looking to the floor where she was sitting. "Did you find one?" the detective questioned.

"I'll bring a few choices and decide when we're down there." Alex put them in a canvas bag she had ready on the sofa of the study. She slung it over her shoulder and turned to Olivia, "Are you ready? I have a picnic basket ready downstairs with snacks and drinks in it." Alex began walking towards the back door.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa…" Olivia halted Alex by blocking her path. "What's going on here, Al?" Olivia motioned to Alex's blue long-sleeved peasant, knee-length cover-up. "Is your bathing suit underneath?"

"Chill out, detective. Unfortunately, not all of us are blessed with bronzed skin, kissed by the lips of the gods. You know I have to take it easy in the sun, and don't you worry your horny little head about it…" Alex lifted her loose top up to reveal her own red, ruffle-top strapless bikini, "I've got it on right here."

Olivia reached for the bare skin of the attorney's toned stomach and Alex's breath hitched, her exhale shaky. They had made love an hour prior but Olivia's touch warmed Alex instantly, her skin tingling upon contact. Alex pressed Olivia's hand more firmly against her stomach and then reached up to cup the brunette's face with both hands.

"I don't want this to end…" Alex breathed, feeling her eyes begin to tear.

"Hey…" Olivia's concern was evident in those warm, chocolate orbs. "It won't. We'll have to go back to the city soon but…you promised me and I promised you, Al…I want to be with you from now until forever." Alex grabbed Olivia's shoulders tenderly and pulled her into a warm, gentle, wordless embrace, the two women holding each other, swaying lightly.

Alex buried her face in the crook of Olivia's neck and took a deep breath, closing her eyes.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

The waves were beautiful that afternoon—high, but not so high that it was impossible to swim. The women had spent a few hours that afternoon talking and looking at the ocean, sipping on homemade limeade that Alex made and tiny cucumber sandwiches with cream cheese.

Before the sun began to dip into the horizon, Olivia decided to take a swim. She spent about forty-five minutes doing laps in front of the house, feeling her muscles work effortlessly as her body glided through the water. The water was fairly chilly but at the same time crisp and refreshing, nonetheless. Laps definitely warmed the brunette up and it helped keep her body warmed on this clear, spring day.

Alex, was right, there hadn't been too many people out that day. Olivia had noticed a couple jogging the length of the beach earlier and a family on the other end of the beach, but other than that, they had their privacy.

After her final lap, Olivia stopped to catch her breath and slicked her hair back with her hands as she walked out of the water, knowing she was enticing the attorney who had been watching her since the sarong had come off. She witnessed as Alex, who was sitting underneath a large beach umbrella, moved her large black-framed sunglasses down lower on her nose and peeked at the detective over the tops of her frames.

Alex let out an obscenely loud whistle by sticking her thumb and forefingers into her mouth—a sound that Olivia never knew she could make. Olivia was highly impressed.

"I thought only Elliot could make that noise."

"My brother taught me when I was nine and he was fifteen. I begged him to teach me. I begged him for a year straight."

"Alex Cabot? Relentless? No. I don't see it," Olivia kidded and was met with a playful slap on her backside as she placed her towel on the top of the lounger.

Olivia sat in the reclining beach chair, put her sunglasses on and leaned her head back, sighing heavily. She reached over for Alex's hand, eyes still closed, and Alex intertwined her fingers with Olivia's. The detective felt her arm being moved and then felt Alex's teeth on her hand, a friendly bite had by the blonde.

Olivia moaned from the feel of warm, soft lips, tongue and teeth on her skin. "Don't we need to keep this _PG_…or even _G_?"

Alex stood and hovered over Olivia, removing her navy cover-up over her head in one sweep. "I don't see anyone around…do you?"

Olivia looked left and right and, sure enough, no one was in sight. Olivia moved her eyes back to Alex, whose body looked absolutely pristine in her red, ruffled strapless bikini. Not an ounce of fat, her lean muscular legs the color of porcelain. Olivia reached up to place her hand on the blonde's upper thigh, knowing it would feel like silk as it always did.

Alex placed her left knee on the beach lounger and placed her other knee on the other side of Olivia, straddling her, resting her hands on Olivia's tanned, toned belly. Alex began stroking circles on Olivia's belly, eliciting a gasp from the detective, and then a smile. Olivia went to place her hands on Alex's thighs but Alex caught the brunette's hands and pinned them above her, as surge of wetness making its way into her navy bikini bottoms from her girlfriend's domination. Alex leaned forward, licking the detective's lips before taking Olivia's bottom lip in her own and tonguing it lightly, sucking gently, the brunette's body responding by trying to get her hands free and wanting to separate her own legs and get some sort of contact as soon as was physically possible. She was hot, aching, wet, and ready. She wanted to be straddling Alex at that moment. Olivia lifted her knee to try and make contact with the blonde's core but her body was too far forward, her knee ending up nudging Alex's backside.

"Fuck, Alex…" Olivia managed in between kisses. "I want you…now. I need to feel you."

Olivia felt Alex's limber slender fingers reach around behind her neck and fiddle with the ties. Before Olivia knew it, the triangles of her top were being pulled down, her breasts set free. Olivia looked at Alex with complete intensity, the cool breeze floating over her naked skin, the ocean behind her, blue eyes boring into her, full pink lips parted. It was almost too much. Olivia felt a pulsing in her groin from plethora of sensations she was feeling. She was sure she might cum if Alex even so much as moved over her clit or placed any pressure on her at all.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex rolled her hips back slightly and thought she witnessed Olivia shudder minutely, her eyes rolling back in her head. _Did she just…?_

"Babe? You OK?" Alex asked, smiling.

Olivia's eyes were closed, definitely in another world. "We…we need to…take this…inside…" She stuttered, her eyes still closed.

Alex grinned knowingly as Olivia's eyes finally opened, her dark pupils captivated and carnal. Alex replaced Olivia's top and Olivia held the fabric to her bosom as she stood, grabbing her towel to cover anything that was or _could_ get exposed. Olivia grabbed the picnic basket and began walking across the sand to the wooden boardwalk path that would lead them back to the house.

Alex watched her eagerness and smiled, shaking her head. The blonde leaned over to pick up the paperbacks that had fallen out of the bag when it fell from the chair. As she placed the last novel into the bag, she noticed a small corner of white peeking from one of the pages. She placed the bag on the chair and then tugged at the white paper. It was folded about three times. Alex unfolded the paper and started at the top, scanning the text with her usual lawyer speed reading skills looking for key words that jumped out at her.

The words that jumped out at her were:

_biopsy_

_malignancy_

_treatment_

_mastectomy_

Alex's knees buckled underneath her but she managed to fall into the lounger before she hit the sand.

"Al?" Olivia called from hallway up the path.

Before she knew it, Olivia was at her side, walking her up the path, her arm supporting her, telling her everything would be OK.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Thank you for those of you who have commented and left notes about the story.**

**As a fairly new fanfiction writer, it is important to us to receive feedback, favoriting, and follows. It makes us realize that we should continue or when we should let something go.**

**I ask and urge you to, if you like the story at all, you favorite either me or the story. I am interested in writing more fanfiction and am open to suggestions about characters and subject matter. But the only way I know to go on is with your encouragement.**

**Thanks again to the people who have followed and favorited the story and me, as an author.**

**I am thinking of (seriously) ending this at chapter 18.**

**I hope you enjoy the rest and please contact me with anything you have!**

**This is what I imagine Liv in that Alex "picked out"…**

** sleepwear/babydolls-and-slips/sheer-babydoll-dream-angels?ProductID=115913&CatalogueType=OLS**

**(in the black color, of course)**

**Patricia**

17

By the time they had gotten back to the house, Alex could finally speak. "I need to sit…"

Olivia had read the note went she went back to find out what was wrong with her girlfriend. The detective had then wrapped her arm around Alex's waist for support as it seemed she would collapse from shock. Once inside the house, Olivia led Alex into the bedroom and sat her on her bed. "Hey…" She knelt down in front of her. "I think you should call your mom maybe tomorrow morning, because of the time difference, and see what happened. There must be a good reason she didn't tell you…"

Alex looked at Olivia, the sadness in those blue eyes unbearable. "The date on the top says December 2004." She rubbed her forehead with her thumb and index finger. "That was when I was in WitSec."

"She _couldn't_ contact you, Al. She didn't even know where you were."

"The fact…" Alex began crying. "The fact that she didn't even tell me about it, even after I came back? That's the kind of thing you tell your daughter. My brother, my father? Neither of them said anything to me either."

"I know, Al. It's probably just difficult to tell you after all this time." Olivia got up and sat next to Alex, rubbing her back soothingly.

"My mother had a mastectomy…Majorly invasive surgery and I didn't know…" Alex stared at the floor, still processing that fact. Suddenly, as if realizing a solution, she said, "I have to talk to her." She got up and walked out of the bedroom, Olivia following her, and proceeded into the study to get her purse. She dug through it and found her cell phone.

"Al, wait…" Olivia tried, placing her hands on top of Alex's before she made the call. "She's seven hours ahead. It's one in the morning there. Are you sure you want to wake her up like this? Make sure you know what you're going to say, what you want to ask…"

"Olivia," she smiled, placing her hand on her cheek, "I'm a lawyer. I know what to say…"

"Yes, but you're also upset and a little hurt and angry. Just…be careful…"

"She's my mother, Liv. There have been many sides to our relationship—we've been very close at times and we've been very alienated at others. We might not have always been the best of friends, but I have always loved her, no matter what…and that's why this hurts so much." Alex looked down at her phone and scrolled through her contacts for the number to their villa in Mallorca, Spain, as her eyes began tearing relentlessly.

Olivia came up behind Alex and put her hands on her shoulders, her chin resting on her left hand. Alex put the phone to her left ear and placed her right on top of Olivia's right hand. Alex closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. She quickly disconnected the phone. "You're right, Liv. It's one in the morning there. It happened five years ago. I need to be rational. Alex closed her eyes and leaned back into Olivia. Alex reached back and cupped Olivia's cheek with her right hand. "Thank you for being the voice of reason and sanity." Alex turned around and faced Olivia, tossing the phone onto the sofa before slithering her arms around the brunette's waist.

Olivia reached up and tucked a piece of hair behind the blonde's ear. "What do you say I make us some dinner. You can relax, watch me cook…? Have a glass of your favorite Chardonnay? I'll wear something skimpy?" Olivia kissed Alex's collarbone and began a trail down to her cleavage, stopping to let her tongue linger.

Alex questioned through her huskiness, "So, I can be the man and watch his little wifey cook him dinner as she wears her naughty lingerie?"

"If that's your fantasy…" Olivia lifted up Alex's cover-up and glided her hands up her back, unclasping the bikini top and letting it fall to the floor before cupping the warm, soft flesh of her breasts. "Let's take a shower and then you can sit on the balcony outside the kitchen and ogle me." Olivia kissed Alex with ferocity as she continued to knead her breasts, pinching her nipples and eliciting a moan from the attorney.

"Sounds perfect."

Olivia wanted to get Alex's mind off of what happened with her mother but she also wanted to be available to talk about anything Alex wanted to talk about. As Alex had been there for her, she wanted to be there for the blonde. Tonight, she would be Alex's comfort in any way she needed.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

While Olivia was still in the shower, after the women had already fulfilled each other's carnal urges, Alex popped her head in. "Liv, I'm going to hit the market for a sec. Do you need anything else while I'm gone?"

"Uh…" Olivia thought, eyes closed, shampoo suds dripping down. "I don't think so…"

"OK, I'll be back in a few and you'd better be wearing that outfit I have on the bed…"

Olivia smiled to herself, wondering which outfit the attorney picked out for her to wear as she continued to wash her hair.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Emerging from the shower, wrapped in a large, plush white towel, Olivia smiled upon seeing the outfit the attorney had chosen for her to wear—a black, lace baby doll with a bustier style top. It was sheer and it was sexy as hell. There was a tiny pair of lacy black thong panties lying next to the baby doll. Alex had even set aside some black diva-type slippers with a slight heel and puffy feathers on top. Olivia put lotion on her body and then slipped the lingerie on, applied lipstick and mascara only, blow dried her hair into romantic billowy waves, a tiny spritz of Samsara—Alex's favorite perfume on Olivia—and then headed upstairs to start dinner.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

By the time Alex made it back from the store, Olivia was at the kitchen counter chopping vegetables for a salad and was prepping a pan for scallops, and had another pan on the back burner puffing away.

Alex had taken part of the ride to and from the store to think about her mother and the possibilities of why she wouldn't have mentioned anything. Alex knew she had to have had her reasons but it still hurt. She made peace with the fact that she would have to find out on the following day. Tonight, she was going to fulfill one of her own fantasies she had mentioned earlier in the day and the fact that Olivia was cooking dinner for her, wearing the lingerie she had picked out for her, made her hornier than a recently released prisoner at a strip club.

Alex walked into the kitchen, watching as Olivia stirred something in front of her with her left hand and grabbed a glass of chilled Chardonnay with her right, setting the glass down. There was some light jazz playing on the Bose® on the counter, candlesticks lit on the kitchen table, and a few other candles lit all around, the screen opened and letting in the cool night breeze.

The blonde set the canvas grocery bag down quietly and then stealthily walked up behind Olivia, smirking at how sexy she looked. God, she looked amazing. Alex could see her black thong through the sheer fabric and her toned, tanned ass looked divine.

Alex walked up behind her and pressed her body against Olivia's, whispering in her ear, "Hey, sexy. Daddy's home."

Olivia turned into Alex's arms and put her forearms on top of the blonde's shoulders, clasping her hands behind her. "Well it's about time. Your devoted wife was getting worried about her wonderful husband, who makes all the money and is the breadwinner of this household, hoping that nothing happened to my poor dear man of the house. I just don't know what I'd do if Wally and the Beav and I had to live without you…I would actually have to get a job…"

Alex laughed, throwing her head back, "Well, June Cleaver could never fill out an outfit like this, that's for sure." Alex leaned in to taste Olivia's lips, a hint of fruitiness from the chardonnay and a slight acidity from the salad dressing that she must have tasted recently.

"Oh, I think June Cleaver probably had a freaky deaky side…we don't know everything about June Cleaver…Maybe she was an animal in the sack."

"Like you?" Alex began sucking on Olivia's neck, Olivia tilting her head for better access.

Olivia let out a low moan, "The food, babe…"

"Maybe it was a mistake…having you put this on before dinner," Alex rasped. "Maybe we should have waited."

Olivia pulled away, Alex hesitantly letting her go, as she lifted the lid of the pot on the back burner, revealing a wild rice pilaf of some sort and stirring it, turning the burner off. "I'm just about to put the scallops in the pan. According to Gordon Ramsay, they should only take a couple of minutes on each side and then everything will be ready." Olivia turned and smiled, winking at Alex.

Alex took the bag from the counter, trying to hide it behind her back before putting it in the freezer.

"Whatcha got there?" Olivia grinned, as she dropped the scallops into the sizzling pan.

_Boy, she doesn't miss a thing_, Alex mused.

Alex slipped the whole bag into the spacious freezer and closed the door. "Something for later…" she said nonchalantly and then walked to the cabinet to retrieve a wine glass. She went to the refrigerator and took out the bottle of Chardonnay, pouring herself a glass before setting the bottle back in the refrigerator.

Olivia looked Alex's ensemble of white Capri pants and a light pink tank top and bare feet over. "As sexy as you look, I think you are more overdressed than I am…why don't you go change, as well…"

Alex smiled and took a sip of wine, one arm resting across her waist. "Nope."

Olivia stood, ready to turn the scallops, looking at Alex incredulously. "Nope? That's it? Nope?"

"Yep." Alex smiled and began walking towards the balcony door. "Let me know when dinner is ready, dear. I'll be watching the views inside and outside. Make sure you drop a lot of things and take your time standing up from getting them." Alex turned as she opened the screen door to see Olivia's reaction. Olivia's face was priceless, her mouth open, a definite quizzical smile on her beautiful face.

She watched as Olivia shook her head and flipped the scallops, smiling. Olivia then lifted up the back of her baby doll, revealing her ass, which she stuck out and shook briefly before bending her knee and sucking on her finger.

_Jesus, she is sexy, _Alex thought as she took a sip of wine and watched Olivia through the window. _I want to be with this woman for the rest of my life_, she mused.

She smiled at the thought, sipping from her glass.

Just then, Olivia intentionally dropped a dishtowel on the floor and then turned so that her backside was facing Alex to pick it up. She took her time bending and then standing, caressing her thighs and bum in the process, then began sliding the towel over her breasts, tilting her head back as though in ecstasy. She looked at Alex and blew her a kiss.

If this was what it would be like, being with Olivia, making dinner for each other every night, being able to watch her and make love to this beautiful woman all the time, Alex wanted to be signed up right away.

Olivia walked toward the door and said through the screen, "Dinner is ready, sweetheart."

Alex smiled and took her wine glass with her inside, closing the screen behind her.

The table had already been set, the food plated, the kitchen lights turned off, only candlelight illuminating the room. The sound of the waves was heard through the screen, Nora Jones playing softly in the background, an ocean breeze wafting through.

The women sat and Alex lifted her glass, Olivia following suit. "To us—friends, lovers, partners, and hopefully more."

Olivia and Alex clinked glasses and took a sip from their respective glasses, Olivia's eyes not leaving her girlfriend. They began eating.

Olivia kept her eyes on her food as she cut a scallop. "What kind of more, Al?"

Alex chewed, looking up at Olivia, and swallowed before speaking. Alex set her fork down and wiped her mouth. She then leaned over and placed her hand on the side of Olivia's neck, brushing her cheek softly with her thumb. "I want forever with you, Liv. I want the whole happy ending…the marriage, the house, the family, a stylish SUV, not a minivan…"

Alex witnessed as Olivia considered her for a moment. Alex knew she was thinking of their history, that Olivia was thinking of past promises. Olivia had been hurt all her life and Alex was one of those people who had hurt her. Olivia's trust was what the detective considered her own weakness. The more she trusted, the more she was devastated when, or if, they let her down. Alex wanted to promise her forever and would keep that promise no matter what happened this time.

Olivia took her glass into her hand and leaned back, watching the flame of the candle stick in front of her.

"I know what you're thinking. That this is déjà vu…but _this time_ everything feels even more perfect than it ever did before and, back then, it was pretty perfect. I want to marry you and make it official. Nothing can separate us, Liv. I can see us tucking a little one in every night, or two little ones, or three little ones, holidays, birthdays, dinners…all of it. Waking up next to you every morning for the rest of my life would be absolute Heaven."

Olivia's eyes began to tear. "Are you asking me to marry you Al?"

Alex smiled, a giddiness rising within her being, "I suppose I am, Liv." Alex gracefully slid from her chair and knelt in front of Olivia, whose tears were now falling, "Olivia Benson…," she took Olivia's hands in her own, "…will you forever be with me, be my wife, marry me, be the mother of our children, and grow old with me?"

Olivia moved her chair and knelt down with Alex, grasping the sides of her face and kissing her like Alex had never felt before—an electricity, a heat, and passion, a love—all rolled into a kiss that said _yes_.

Alex brought her hands to Olivia's toned arms and rubbed them up and down softly, "Well?" she smiled.

"A million times, _yes_, Alex. A million times unquestionably, irrefutably, undeniably, _yes_." Olivia kissed Alex quickly this time and the two embraced, holding tightly.

Alex could feel Olivia shaking beneath her.

Olivia whispered, still in each others' embrace, "I hope that was ice cream you put in the freezer." She nibbled at the attorney's ear, a moan escaping the blonde.

"You'll see, babe." Alex's hand slid down Olivia's waist to her backside. "Let's eat so you can find out…"

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

**A/N: The proposal just came to me. It seemed right. The ice cream scene will come next. Next, Alex will call her mother and get that sorted out. She and Olivia will also discuss going back to work. They will also plan a dinner party before they go back and invite the gang. A run-in with Todd and Chris is possible again.;)**


	18. Chapter 18

18

Olivia felt the coolness of the ice cream being spread on the back of her left thigh and she jumped slightly. She then felt Alex's warm mouth, suctioned to her skin, licking it off, her tongue darting in and out. "Uhhh, Alex…"

"Not to deter from this romantic moment, but I'm going to have to apply and lick right away so that the sheets don't get dirty."

Olivia propped her upper half up on her forearms and looked back at Alex. "Are you serious?" she asked, smiling. "If you didn't want to get the sheets dirty, where did you think we were going to do this?"

"Here," Alex answered and then spooned a scoop and put it in her mouth.  
"What are you doing?" Olivia asked, laughing. "This is supposed to be sexy."

Olivia looked at the container, "That's not even ice cream…what _is_ that?" She was still laughing. "Is that gelato?"

Alex looked ashamed and smiled innocently, "They didn't have any plain vanilla Ben & Jerry's so I opted for chocolate gelato because I thought it would look nice with your skin tone. Also, I couldn't see me spreading some sort of chunky flavor on you, trying to chew the pieces of candy and nuts and cookies in between licking it off of you."

Olivia continued to laugh. "You're a mess." She sat up and grabbed the spoon, scooping herself a taste. "Mmm…not bad. We could do this in the tub or the pool? Or we could take it to the beach. It's dark and there shouldn't be anyone around. We could just take a dip when we're done."

"But I was hoping the ice cream could be a wonderful segue into the next step and Lord knows I wouldn't want to walk all the way back to the house as aroused as you make me…"

"You mean the half mile it takes to walk back to the compound…I know…Your family needs to invest in a golf cart or something."

Alex leaned over and bit Olivia's hip and Olivia jumped.

"You couldn't have gone with the traditional whipped cream?"

"Too boring…and also messy," Alex admitted, taking another spoonful into her mouth.

"So chocolate gelato was the next best thing…"

"I thought it was…OK, so…pool or bathtub?" Alex inquired.

"I think pool…it's heated, right?"

"Yep. Besides, the ocean is cold this time of night," Alex said, popping another spoonful into her mouth.

Olivia shook her head. "OK, save some for the pool, Al."

The women went out to the pool and Olivia lowered one of the deck chairs to a reclined position and lay on her belly, awaiting the seduction.

With a full mouth, Alex said, "OK, get ready to be seduced." Alex sat on the edge of the lounger.

Olivia laughed, her body shaking uncontrollably. "I'm ready. Don't worry."

"Stop laughing," Alex commanded.

"Then stop eating."

Alex put another spoonful of gelato on the left cheek of Olivia's thong covered backside and then the right cheek. Then, she put more on her thighs and calves, and even more on her back, all the while the detective shook with laughter.

"Liv!" Alex said incredulously.

Olivia stopped laughing once Alex's mouth found her ass cheek and began kissing and sucking, feeling the warm, hot, soft mouth of the attorney as she licked her clean. She could feel her core begin to burn with desire as Alex continued to lick and suck her skin until the gelato was gone. Alex placed the carton on the deck table next to her and began to pull Olivia's thong panties off, inching them down her legs and then pulling them off completely.

Olivia let out a sigh, feeling the cool breeze on her exposed skin.

"Turn over," Alex commanded.

Olivia did as she was told and turned over. Alex lifted the baby doll from the bottom and Olivia lifted her arms up, and then she lay back down, now completely naked. Alex spooned some gelato onto Olivia's nipples, her cleavage, her neck, her upper thighs and then a dollop on her mound, feeling the coolness as it began to drip down the length of her warmth. She hissed at the sensation.

Alex smiled and put the carton back on the table. She leaned forward and placed a kiss on Olivia's lips before continuing down to her neck, her mouth suctioning her skin, sending chills all over her body, her nipples hardening, her core pulsing. Alex moved her way to Olivia's cleavage and licked, sucking off the sticky sweetness as she moved, stopping to pleasure her left breast, taking her nipple in her mouth and lavishing it before sucking gently and then biting her lightly.

Olivia grabbed Alex's head and arched her back as the blonde moved to the other breast and gave it the same attention. "Ohhhh, Alex…" Olivia moaned, her body on fire.

Alex moved further down, licking the gelato from her belly and thighs before positioning herself at Olivia's entrance, the detective's eyes closed, anticipating the last stop.

Olivia could feel herself trembling, waiting for Alex's touch. As Alex's tongue touched Olivia's clit first, she felt her body shudder. Having not had a release from their frolicking earlier on the beach, Olivia had been primed and ready all afternoon. She knew it wouldn't take much, and all of the foreplay happening at the moment was only intensifying her need for a release.

Olivia spread her legs further as Alex began licking the length of her slit, sucking all of the gelato from her throbbing lips. Alex pushed Olivia's legs back and towards her to bend at the knee and spread her thighs further apart as she settled in for her mission. Olivia grabbed the back of Alex's head, pulling at her soft tresses as Alex continued to work on Olivia's entrance, her tongue moving rhythmically and skillfully to facilitate her pleasure.

Olivia could feel her body begin to lose control, her breathing shaky and her moaning low and erotic. She tossed her head from side to side, the sensations more wonderful than anything she had ever felt as Alex's soft tongue plunged deeper and deeper.

Panting, Olivia squealed, her voice an octave higher than normal, "Alex…I'm going to come…"

Alex continued her ministrations as Olivia's body peaked and then began shuddering, releasing the warmth and pulsating in her groin, her spasms strong and uncontrolled. Once her breathing slowed, Alex looked up at Olivia from in between her thighs. She kissed her clit lightly and then Olivia brought her legs down, Alex sitting beside her.

Eyes still closed, Olivia whispered, "That was incredible." She smiled as she felt Alex now hovering over her. She opened her eyes.

"I think Cabot-Benson has a nice ring to it, don't you?" Alex leaned forward closer and planted a tender kiss on Olivia's parted lips.

"Or Benson-Cabot…" Olivia tried.

"Either way…" Olivia whispered, still catching her breath, "…sounds good to me."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex awoke the following morning before Olivia. Their night of lovemaking after Alex's proposal was intense, lengthy, and extremely athletic. It was exhausting for both women and simultaneously immensely gratifying. But that morning, Alex knew what she had to do. She needed to talk to her mother and hear about her cancer and hear it directly from her. However, she knew she would need Olivia's moral support and so, she would wait and make the call when her girlfriend awoke.

Alex gently got up from the bed and looked at Olivia sprawled out in the middle, a thin sheet covering her tanned, spent form, her head to the side, breathing deeply, mouth open. Alex smiled to herself.

_That's my future wife_, she reflected.

She leaned over Olivia and kissed her temple softly, so as not to wake her, before grabbing her robe and putting it on, along with her glasses, and then padded down the hallway to go upstairs to the kitchen.

Once in the kitchen, she fixed the coffee pot for Olivia and herself and turned the kitchen TV on to catch the news. Listening to it in the background, she took the whole grain bread from the refrigerator and the carton of eggs. She popped four slices of bread into the toaster and took a bowl down to scramble some eggs.

Cracking six eggs into the bowl, she took the whisk from the utensil holder and whisked them. She wasn't sure how she would open the topic of her mother's breast cancer, only that she had to. This was a secret that never should have been kept. Alex had a right to know, along with the rest of the family. With Olivia sitting next to her, she knew she would remain calm and collected and speak with her mother rationally.

Once the eggs had been whisked into a nice froth, she placed the bowl into the refrigerator to wait for Olivia to come upstairs. The toast popped up and Alex left it to cool as she grabbed a cup and filled it with coffee that she felt she needed rather desperately this morning. They had fallen asleep around one in the morning and it was only seven now. Alex hadn't gotten enough sleep but, with her mind racing and her apprehension about speaking to her mother, she just couldn't manage to relax and sleep any longer.

She took her coffee to the balcony and left the screen open to continue listening to the news as she sat in a wooden Adirondack chair and looked out at the calm water. The waves were much calmer than they had been on the previous day, and Alex considered taking a dip later on in the day.

_She and Olivia would be engaged_.

She would have to buy a ring when they got back—something as beautiful as she was—nothing too flashy for her job because she didn't want the detective to ever take it off, so it had to be something simple and elegant like her. That gorgeous brunette, laying naked in her bed, was hers. So many years she pined for Olivia, wishing for a relationship. Olivia says that it was the same on her end. From the moment of their first meeting nine years prior Alex knew, felt the attraction, the pull, the connection and Olivia shared a similar story.

She wasn't sure how her parents would take the news. She had proclaimed to her parents, in her mid twenties that she liked women, but she had known it way before that. Her parents watched her date men throughout high school and college and law school, hoping that one day their daughter would marry a handsome attorney or doctor, both be successful, and have beautiful babies. But it hadn't worked out that way. And when she met Olivia when she was twenty-five, she knew instinctively that there was no going back. She pined and dreamed and lusted after Olivia through her many hairstyles and loved every one of them, imagined running her fingers through them. Although it would be a couple years before she and Olivia would actually begin a relationship, she knew then and there she would need to proclaim her affiliation to her parents.

Even though she had told them almost ten years ago that she was much more attracted to women than men, she knew that, in the back of their minds, they still had the dream that she would marry a successful man to call their son-in-law.

"Good morning, Babe," Olivia said, her voice raspy. She came out with a cup of coffee already in her hand and sat in the chair next to Alex. She turned and smiled at the blonde and then leaned her head back and closed her eyes sighing and moaning contentedly.

"Babe, why are you up so early?" Alex questioned. "I didn't wake you, did I?"

"No, not at all." Olivia tried, yawning heavily. "Wow…that was something last night." She smiled. "Amazing."

"Are you sick?" Alex questioned, noting the hoarseness in Olivia's voice.

"No, no…I think it's from all the screaming I did last night." Olivia smiled.

"You _were_ pretty loud," Alex grinned. "Hey…"

Olivia turned her head and opened her eyes.

"Is the future Mrs. Cabot-Benson ready for some breakfast?"

"Well, the future Mrs. Benson-Cabot might be."

Alex stood and hovered over Olivia, mug in hand, "Let's get some breakfast. I want to call my mom before we get our day started and I was thinking maybe a dip in the ocean later on? I'd also like to take you out to dinner tonight. Some place nice to celebrate." She planted a kiss on Olivia's waiting mouth, her tongue lingering, touching Olivia's own. Pulling away she stated, "I will never tire of kissing you, Liv. You have the softest, most sensual lips I've ever felt."

"Ditto on that. Now help an old, sore woman up."

Alex took her hand and smiled as she offered her hand and pulled Olivia up with ease before the two women headed back inside for breakfast.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex sat, white knuckles gripping her cell phone in her left hand as Olivia sat on her right on the sofa in the study. Olivia had Alex's right hand in her lap as they both waited for the other end to pick up.

Alex pressed the speaker function on her phone and put it on her leg as the women listened to the ring dialing through. Olivia was about to say that she didn't need to have it on speaker if she didn't want to, but was interrupted by a voice picking up on the other end.

"Hola. La residencia de Senor y Senora Cabot."

"Hi, Camilla. It's Alexandra."

"Ohhhhh, Miss Alexandra," Camilla said enthusiastically, her Spanish accent very strong. "How are jou, Miss?"

Camilla had been with the Cabots in Spain for almost ten years as their housekeeper and when her parents went there for half of the year, she stayed in the house, keeping it up for them. She had her own room in the downstairs level of the house for the times they were there.

"I'm doing well, Camilla. How are you?"

"Oh…is berry hot here right now. Berry hot. Like thirty-six Celsius, I tink."

"Wow." Alex smiled.

"And there? The weather?"

"It's beautiful here," Alex looked at Olivia and smiled. "I think it's about eighteen or nineteen degrees Celsius here", Alex computed her calculation quickly from what she remembered from college.

"Oh, das nice. Das nice. Goo weather. Jou wanna talk to jour mama?"

"Please, Camilla. That would be wonderful."

"OK, Ms. Alex. It was berry nice to speak to jou."

Alex could hear the phone being put onto a table or other surface and Olivia squeezed her hand reassuringly.

Olivia reached and stroked Alex's hair softly. "You can do this."

"Alex?" A female voice was heard on the other end.

"Mom," Alex smiled, her voice instantly shaky with emotion, her face contorting with angst.

Olivia rubbed her back reassuringly.

"Alex, is everything OK? Katie called your father and told us you were staying at the house. Everything's all right there, isn't it?" Her mother's voice was slightly panicked.

"Yes, Mom, everything is fine here." Alex took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I just wanted to call and talk to you…"

There was a short pause before Alex's mother spoke, "About what, Honey?"

Alex looked at Olivia who nodded and squeezed her hand once again.

Alex continued, "I found a doctor's note…inside one of your books."

She waited. "Mom?"

"I'm here. I knew this day might come."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Alex said through clenched teeth, her voice on the verge of losing control.

Olivia continued rub her back and placed her chin on Alex's right shoulder, whispering softly, only loud enough for Alex to hear, "It's OK…"

"I'm sorry, Alex. You were gone. You had gone away. It all happened so fast and when you came back, I was healed and doing fine. The cancer was gone and I didn't want to bring it up and worry you."

Alex's voice was softer now, "You don't think that, as your daughter, I had a right to know?" Alex held her forehead in her left hand, her right still gripped with Olivia's.

"Alex…"

"So you had major surgery that removed a part of you, something that could be passed down to me or my children, and you didn't want to worry me?" Alex's voice was calm and controlled.

"Alex, the only thing I can say is that I'm sorry. I knew if you found out after the fact you would be upset. Time went by and more time went by and then it was too late."

"And now?" Alex asked, leaning her head against Olivia's.

"Now, I'm fine. I get checked two times a year. I'm a vegan now, exercise every day and try to live healthfully so it doesn't return."

Alex smiled, "A vegan? Since when?"

"About six months ago. Not only did I do it for my health but I saw a horrid documentary that made me never want to touch an animal product again. I feel better than I have in twenty years. How about you, dear. How are you? Do you have a gentleman staying with you, keeping you company?"

Alex lifted her head off of Olivia's shoulder and looked at her. "No, Mom. Not a gentleman. Very far from a gentleman, actually."

"Oh…I see."

"You remember Olivia Benson, don't you, from five years ago?"

"Yes, yes I remember. That detective lady."

"Yes, she's the one. She came here with me. She needed some time to relax and so did I."

"Well, you two stay as long as you want. Enjoy yourselves."

Alex smiled at her mother's attempt at amends.

"Oh, Alex, your father just walked in. Would you like to speak with him?"

"Of course. Put him on."

Olivia could feel Alex's body relax and knew that she was feeling more at ease as she scooted over and swung her legs over the arm of the couch and rested her head on Olivia's lap, holding the phone in the air. Olivia began stroking her hair that was now splayed out around her head.

"Buttercup?"

"Hi, Daddy…" Alex sang, her eyes filling with emotion once again. "How are you?"

"Oh, Buttercup, I'm fine. It's very hot here, though. Your mother and I will probably be coming back to New York soon."

"I'm glad. I haven't seen you guys in almost a year."

"Have you heard from your brother, Alex? He hasn't called us in months. If you talk to him, tell him to call us."

"Yeah, I spoke with him about a week ago. The program still has him in South Africa and he will be going to Nigeria next," Alex explained.

Her brother was in Doctor's Without Borders and it took him wherever he was needed. Alex hadn't seen him in almost two years but spoke with him often.

"OK, well, take care Princess. We'll talk soon, OK?"

"OK, Daddy. I love you."

"I love you, too, Baby."

The line disconnected and Olivia smiled at Alex, still stroking her hair.

Alex's eyes began tearing once again. "Thank you, Liv."

"For what?" she laughed.

"Just being here for me."

Olivia leaned down and kissed Alex softly. "It's what any wife worth her weight would do, right?"

Alex smiled. "Let's go swimming. You can teach me that stroke you were doing yesterday."

"Anything you want, Baby. Anything at all."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO


	19. Chapter 19

19

"OK, so…" Alex tried, her legs wrapped around Olivia's waist, her arms wrapped around her neck, in the cool ocean water, "…how was that stroke again?"

Olivia adjusted Alex's bottom, her two hands cupping it and pulling the blonde closer to her. They were chest high and Alex was feeling frisky that afternoon, not able to keep her hands or lips off of Olivia.

Alex giggled when Olivia brushed her sides under the water, her mouth going for the tender spot on Olivia's neck.

"Uuuuhhhh, Al, I can't show you if you won't let go of me."

"I'm never letting go of you."

"Then this will be very difficult having a dead weight on me while trying to teach you the breast stroke."

"Mmmm, the breast stroke, huh?" Alex looked down at Olivia's cleavage, "I like the sound of that. Whose breast will get stroked?"

Olivia smiled at the sky, "Jesus, Alex!" Olivia laughed. "So, are we doing this, or what?"

"Doing what?" Alex began kissing Olivia's shoulders, her hands wandering to the back of her bikini and pulling at the strings.

"Al…" Olivia warned. "Don't you dare…"

Alex tugged gently, the ties coming undone easily, a facetious smile on her face.

"Alex," Olivia's tone was firm, yet a slight smile adorned her glistening, bronzed face.

Alex leaned in for a kiss, lifting the fabric from Olivia's bikini top and cupping her breasts underneath the water.

Olivia moaned at the touch as Alex kneaded her flesh firmly, resolutely, thumbing her hard, pebbled nipples, her tongue darting in and out of Olivia's warm, eager mouth. Olivia's hands found their way inside Alex's bikini bottoms and she gripped the soft globes of flesh, her right hand moving further down, in between her legs from behind.

Alex jumped at the sensation. "Liv," she gasped, "more…"

"Shouldn't we go back to the house?"

"I can't wait…no one will see us." Alex whispered, panting, her eyes closed, mouth opened, her breathing already heavy.

Olivia brought her hand to the front of Alex's bikini bottoms and slipped her finger inside her warmth, Alex wrapping her legs tighter around Olivia's waist, her heels digging into her lower back. Olivia slipped another finger inside, Alex moaning, and then another. Alex began to slowly ride Olivia's fingers rhythmically, pumping faster and faster. She buried her face into the crook of the brunette's neck, panting.

"That's it, Baby," Olivia encouraged, "Come for me…"

As Alex continued to ride Olivia's fingers, Alex felt Olivia's thumb brush against her tight bundle of nerves, causing her to jump and moan, her orgasm seconds away. She bit into Olivia's shoulder, causing the brunette to hiss. With a couple more strokes, Alex found herself crashing down around Olivia's hand, her body jolting from the intensity. She held on tightly, riding out the rest of the aftershocks.

Panting, she leaned back to look at Olivia. She stroked her ear, her cheek, her neck and then her shoulder where she had bitten her. She kissed the redness, "I'm sorry…" She kissed it gently again, "I guess I got carried away."

Olivia's eyes were dark with lust. She shook her head, "Don't apologize. I'll live." She smiled. "Do you think you could tie me back up?"

Alex finally released her legs from around Olivia and Olivia turned around, replacing the fabric on her breasts.

"I suppose so…" Alex tied her top back on and Olivia turned around, reaching her hand out for her girlfriend.

The walked out of the water hand-in-hand and walked to the beach loungers underneath the umbrella. Olivia scooted hers to be in the sun while Alex stayed in the shade. Both women lay down.

After a few contented, silent moments, Alex said, her voice relaxed, "I made reservations at Chamberlain's Seafood for seven-thirty. This time we're going and we're getting champagne and we're celebrating."

"Sounds good," Olivia stated, her voice heavy with relaxation.

"It _is_ them!" a voice said, getting closer.

Alex opened her eyes and lifted her sunglasses. It was Chris and Todd.

_Shit_.

"Good afternoon ladies," Chris said, stepping closer, accidentally kicking sand in the process. "Brittany and…Trixie, right?"

Olivia snickered, still reclined, eyes closed.

"You got it, Chris," Alex said without enthusiasm.

"Enjoying your day?" Chris now stood in front of Olivia, blocking her sun.

She lifted her sunglasses to the top of her head and squinted, shielding her eyes from the sun. "We are having a wonderful day, Chris," Olivia said, looking at Alex.

Todd decided that he had already claimed Alex as his own and sat down in the sand next to her chair. Alex rolled her eyes and put her sunglasses back on, leaning back.

"Chris, could you…" Olivia motioned for him to step to his right so that she could continue to catch some rays.

He moved quickly, "Ooops, sorry. Yeah…," he began, looking her over appreciatively, "…gotta work on that tan, huh?"

Olivia noticed him adjusting himself and she leaned back again, putting her sunglasses back on.

"You know," he started, "for cougars you two have bangin' bodies."

"An actress has to keep her figure, Chris," Olivia stated matter-of-factly, irritation in her voice.

"What is it that you two boys needed?" Alex intervened, feeling the waves of annoyance emanating from her girlfriend.

"Well, we're having a bonfire tomorrow evening a little ways up the beach at Road D. We'll have kegs, a full bar, and of course, a bonfire. A friend of mine is supposed to come with his band and have a little acoustic session."

"What time, Chris?" Alex looked to her right and found Todd laying down, now doing sit-ups and watching his abs with every movement, obviously admiring himself.

"About nine o'clock. It'll go all night, I'm sure. You ladies up for it?"

"We'll see, Chris. You said Road D and Meadow?"

"Yeah, just bring yourselves…and those bikinis…Come on, Todd."

Todd got up, bowed to Alex and then joined his friend as they began walking north up the beach.

"The puppy dogs don't get it," Olivia mumbled. "Even after our display at the restaurant, they still don't understand."

"Maybe we should make it very clear, then," Alex smirked.

"Meaning?" Olivia questioned.

"We go and have some fun. Leave them no doubt that we're together…within reason of course."

"I like the way you think." Olivia grinned.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Olivia emerged from the shower and towel-dried her hair, her curly waves already forming in her sun-kissed locks. Her tan was almost perfect now and she only had two triangles of flesh on her bosoms that were paler than the rest of her skin, along with the patch of lighter skin where her bikini bottoms covered the front. She had made sure to expose her backside when lying on her stomach so that her bum could get a nice, golden color, as well. She looked at herself in the full-length mirror as she dried off. _Not bad for a cougar_, she thought.

"Hey, there," a voice husked from the doorway.

Olivia looked to find Alex in a beautiful, knee-length, thin-strapped, lilac dress, her hair up in a twist, glasses off, a chilled glass of wine in her hand, watching Olivia.

Olivia grinned and walked up to Alex, putting her hands around her waist. Alex looked down at Olivia's naked form and moaned, then took a sip of wine. The blonde's makeup was impeccable, her hair pinned just right. The heels she was wearing had her towering over Olivia's barefooted form.

"I feel like a peasant gypsy girl next to you," Olivia joked.

"Maybe we can role play that later on…" Alex offered her glass to Olivia and Olivia took a small sip, then kissed Alex delicately so as not to mess her perfectly drawn lips. "We have about forty minutes until our reservation and the restaurant is about fifteen minutes away," Alex informed her.

"Right, I'm on it." Olivia turned and walked to the bathroom mirror and began moisturizing, Alex still standing there watching her.

"I'll be upstairs on the balcony. I don't think I can take watching you right now without jumping you…" Alex smiled and then turned to leave.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Within fifteen minutes, Olivia entered the kitchen and Alex's breath hitched. She had to tell herself to breathe an even then, she had forgotten how.

Olivia was a goddess. She wore an off-white strapless, knee-length satiny dress, almost resembling a slip but somehow, her breasts were held in place perfectly, her nipples just subtly poking through the silky fabric. Her tanned skin was a beautiful contrast to the light material and her off-white, sling-back, peep-toe heels added to her stature. Her make-up was exotic and flawless, announcing to the world that she was a confident, sexy woman.

Alex stood from the chair outside and walked into the kitchen, closing and locking the door behind her, her eyes not leaving Olivia. She put her glass on the kitchen table and walked up to her girlfriend, cupping her jaw delicately in her hands. "You look absolutely incredible," Alex whispered, resting her forehead against Olivia's.

Olivia grabbed her wrists and held them, both women closing their eyes, savoring the closeness and not wanting to mess the other up. As difficult as it was, both women controlled themselves, knowing that what they wanted to do would have to come later.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

The ride to Chamberlain's Seafood was quiet, with Yo-Yo Ma and Ennio Morricone playing on the car stereo, it was a time for silent contentment as Alex held Olivia's hand and drove.

When they got to the restaurant, Alex told Olivia to wait to get out and the blonde went around and opened the car door for Olivia, who took her hand and helped her exit the car. "Such a gentleman," she gushed.

The two entered the posh restaurant and were immediately met by a maitre d'. Alex approached the podium. "Reservations for Cabot, 7:30."

"Yes, yes, Ms. Cabot, right this way."

The maitre d' led them through the dimly-lit restaurant, each table adorned with candles and white tablecloths, shiny silverware and beautiful white china, and well-dressed patrons. Obviously money was present.

The women stopped at the table and the maitre d' pulled out the chair for Alex first and then Olivia. He then took the cloth napkins from the plates, opened them, shook them out with flair, and then placed them in each of the women's laps.

"Thank you," Olivia tried.

"Oh, the pleasure is all mine. Halston should be with you shortly."

Within seconds, Halston approached the table, a towel over his forearm, his black tuxedo immaculate. He seemed to be in his late forties to early fifties, salt and pepper hair, very handsome with charming laugh lines and piercing green eyes.

"Hello ladies. My name is Halston and I will be your illustrious server this evening."

"Hello, Halston," Alex began. "We're celebrating tonight so if we could have a bottle ofMoet et Chandon Dom Perginon , chilled, to start with and some of your oysters on the half shell, extra lemon wedges."

"Of course…congratulations. If I may ask, what are you celebrating?"

Alex placed her hand on top of Olivia's. "We're getting engaged." She looked at Olivia and smiled.

"Ahhh, wonderful! I wish my boyfriend would propose. Who did the honors here? Let me guess…" He turned to Olivia.

She shook her head and smiled so he turned to Alex.

"It was me," Alex blushed.

"Well, congratulations to both of you." He looked between the women and smiled before continuing. "Our soups of the day are corn chowder or New England clam chowder and our special tonight is a freshly-caught wasabi encrusted cod served alongside a creamy white cheddar and mushroom risotto and a dinner salad. I'll let you two look over the menu and I'll have the champagne and oysters right out."

"Mmmm," Olivia moaned. "That sounded wonderful."

"Hungry?"

"You have no idea," Olivia drawled, still looking at her menu.

Alex watched Olivia, "You look absolutely incredible, Liv. I can't take my eyes off of you."

It was Olivia's turn to blush. "Thank you…you don't look so bad yourself, Babe." Olivia reached for Alex's hand and intertwined her fingers with the blonde's. "But, truthfully, I can't wait to bring that zipper down in a little while…" She stated, her eyes still on the menu.

She saw Alex shift in her seat from the corner of her eye and she smirked.

When Halston came back, he made a big show of uncorking the champagne, filling the two flutes, and then setting the bottle in the ice-filled stand he set next to the table. A second waiter brought the oysters and set them down in the middle of the table.

"Are you going to need a few more minutes?" he asked.

"I think we want to take our time tonight, Halston. Enjoy every minute," Alex looked at Olivia, her gaze piercing and intense.

"Of course. I'll be back in a few minutes." He turned and walked away.

"Much nicer than Heather," Olivia commented.

"The difference? He needs this job. She didn't." Alex held up her glass and Olivia did as well. "To happiness, love, wonderful times and lots of sex. To my future beautiful wife that I plan on ravaging nightly and making her the happiest woman in the world." They clinked glasses and sipped.

"Oh, that tastes so good," Olivia whispered. "We might be in trouble. I get…handsy with champagne."

"I don't mind handsy," Alex grinned, taking another sip.

Olivia leaned back and looked around the restaurant. Women in beaded or sequined dresses, men in dark suits or tuxedos, absolutely not one child present. This was a fine dining establishment with the prime elite diners of Southampton's richest. And Olivia was here with her future wife. The brunette was not used to this sort of atmosphere but somehow, with Alex, she felt at ease.

"Here, have one of these." Alex held out an oyster she had already put lemon and horseradish cocktail sauce on. Olivia leaned forward and opened her mouth wide, Alex holding her other hand underneath as Olivia sucked in the contents with ease. "Jesus, Olivia. That was…" Alex began fanning herself with her hand, her face flushing terribly. She took a sip of champagne and then a deep breath. "God, you're sexy," she whispered.

Olivia smirked, "Your turn." Olivia prepared another oyster shell for her girlfriend and held it in the air in between them. "Don't bite me," she chided.

"That comes later," Alex answered, opening her mouth as Olivia tilted the shell towards her, the contents sliding off and down her throat.

Olivia's mouth opened in surprise, "Did you even chew that?"

"Just slid right on in…" Alex washed it down with more champagne.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

After they had ordered and they had gotten and eaten most of the their food, most of the champagne contents gone, Alex felt something touch her knee and then move to her inner thigh. Alex grabbed the object that was trying to be somewhere it didn't need to be at that moment.

"Olivia," Alex warned, grabbing the brunette's foot. "I swear to God…"

"I told you I get handsy…or, in this case, footsy." The brunette's chest was flushed, her cleavage exposed.

Alex held on to her foot, holding it in a death grip as she glared at Olivia. "Not here, Liv."

Olivia pouted and took her foot away. "I have to use the ladies' room." She stood, wavering slightly and giggled, and then made her way to the restroom.

Alex smiled as she watched Olivia walk to the restroom. The brunette turned back and winked momentarily before slipping through the door.

God, she was lucky. The most beautiful woman in the world wanted her, wanted to be with her, make love to her, marry her. She felt an overwhelming joy rise up and tears form in her eyes.

"Can I get you ladies any dessert?" Halston was back.

"I think we'll take a chocolate mousse to share and two decaf cappuccinos."

"That'll be on me," Halston winked. "You two ladies are absolutely precious and it's the least I can do for a happy couple."

"Thank you, Halston." Alex made a mental note to give him a large tip when she signed the bill.

Olivia headed back to the table, having applied fresh lipstick and having fluffed her hair up a bit more. She looked like a tiger, her eyes piercing, her walk predatory. She approached the table and sat, placing her napkin back on her lap and finished what was left in her glass. She leaned over towards Alex, "I'm so horny right now, Al. I can hardly think straight."

Alex cleared her throat and reached over and emptied the rest of the contents of the bottle between both glasses. "I ordered us dessert and coffees."

"What? But I wanna go home now and make love to you," Olivia whimpered.

Alex looked at Olivia, a slight smile on her face. "You didn't mention the fact that you get whiney as well as handsy."

Olivia huffed loudly and leaned back. "Fine." She pouted. "I guess I can wait."

"Well, you're gonna have to, Liv."

Olivia stuck her tongue out briefly at the blonde and Alex shook her head, "Incorrigable."

Dessert and coffees were brought to the table and Olivia moaned every time she spooned mousse into her mouth, Alex's underwear becoming soaked with arousal. "Liv, can you not make those noises?"

"I'm sorry, is my pleasure bothering you?"

"I live for your pleasure, Babe…but my pleasure is having a difficult time."

Olivia took another bite and groaned loudly, receiving a couple of stares from nearby male patrons.

"_Stop_," Alex smiled, rubbing her forehead with her forefinger and thumb.

Alex decided to change the subject. "I was thinking…since I have to be back at work by next Wednesday, and it's Tuesday today, so we would have to leave Monday, we could have a dinner party this Saturday and invite the gang from the squad for the night and if they needed to stay over, they could. What do you think?"

Olivia smiled. "I think that's a perfect idea." Olivia leaned closer. "Now…can we please get home so I can fuck your brains out?"

Alex smiled and motioned to Halston who came over immediately, her eyes returning to the brunette's and not leaving them. "Check please."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

They almost didn't make it inside the house. As Alex tried to fumble with the key in the lock, Olivia had her mouth on the blonde's neck, pulling at her straps and planting heated, tongued kisses on any exposed skin she could find. Alex dropped the keys and when she stood back up, Olivia's hand had quickly found its way underneath the blonde's dress and she stealthily slipped her hand inside the attorney's panties.

"Lib," she tried, the detective's teeth clamped on her lower lip, preventing her from speaking properly. Even though shaking and weak from arousal, her knees practically buckling beneath her, she managed to open the door.

Olivia grabbed her face with both hands and pulled her inside while kissing her savagely, Alex simultaneously closing the door with her foot. Olivia kicked her shoes off, leaving them where they landed and then pressed herself against Alex, reaching around and starting at the top, unzipping her lilac dress skillfully. It dropped to the floor and Alex stepped out of it. Alex repeated the same on Olivia's dress, unzipping the back and letting it fall to the floor. She wasn't wearing a bra, Alex noted, smiling.

Olivia stepped out of her dress and her hands immediately went to Alex's strapless bra, squeezing the blonde's breasts through the silky fabric, lowering the satin on her left breast and wrapping her lips around an already hardened, waiting nipple. While pleasuring her breast, Olivia reached down and pulled the attorney's lacy, white thong downward, Alex quickly stepping out of that, as well. Olivia's hands reached around and unclasped the bra with ease and left it on the floor. When Olivia reached down in between the blonde's legs, Alex stopped her. "I have something special for you…"

She took Olivia by the hand and led her back to the bedroom. "Lie down," Alex instructed.

Olivia did as she was told and lay in the middle of the bed.

Alex disappeared into the bathroom and seconds later came out with a strap on that must have been nine inches in length. Olivia's eyes went wide her mouth agape, but Alex couldn't read if it was anticipation or horror. The moment Olivia's open mouth turned into a smile, she knew.

Alex crawled onto the bed, leaving the appendage for the moment. She knelt next to Olivia and tugged at her panties, pulling them down and tossing them on the floor.

"I see you took _fucking my brains out _in a literal sense?"

Alex nodded. "Have you used one recently?"

A flush crept into Olivia's cheeks as she nodded. "About a year ago, but never that big…" She eyed the toy that was lying off to the side.

"I won't hurt you, Liv. I'll take it as slow or fast, as hard or as soft as you want it."

Olivia nodded and raised her head up to meet Alex's mouth. Alex positioned herself in between Olivia's thighs and pressed her body to hers, continuing to kiss the brunette. "Thank you for the ocean orgasm…Now, it's your time…" Alex moaned as she kissed her way down to Olivia's warmth, one hand propping her up, the other caressing Olivia's breast and squeezing her pebbled nipple. Her mouth made it to Olivia's warmth, her excitement already evident from her glistening folds. Alex lapped up her juices and began sucking her clit before using her fingers to begin to stimulate her and open her up before the toy would be used.

Olivia moaned, panting, as Alex slipped in a third and fourth finger, stretching the detective wider. "Fuck me, Alex. I want you inside me…" Olivia's core was throbbing, waiting for Alex to fill her. She wanted to be dominated, filled to the hilt, hitting that spot she knew would be hit with the phallus.

She watched as Alex stood and stepped into the harness straps, pulling it up and positioning it at the top of her mound before tightening the straps. The look on Alex's flushed face was one of pure carnality, her eyes pools of dark blue as she climbed back on top of the bed and found her way back in between Olivia's legs.

"How do you want this?"

"I want my ankles on your shoulders and you entering me hard."

Alex moaned, her own arousal dripping down her inner thigh.

Alex positioned herself at Olivia's entrance and placed the tip against her lips, Olivia moaning instantly.

"Inside…" Olivia whispered.

Alex pushed further, and Olivia looked down noticing the device was already coated with her own excitement. Olivia threw her head back as Alex plunged halfway in, withdrawing slowly. Olivia groaned with pleasure. A few more times and Alex was all the way inside her. Olivia then lifted her feet and placed her ankles on Alex's shoulders, her legs trembling with desire. From this angle, the dildo hit the exact spot that made Olivia shudder, a burning warmth tingling inside her, and every time she did, she felt Alex moan and jump as well. The way the strap on was positioned, it was obvious that Alex was getting pleasure from each thrust as well. Before long, Olivia was panting and pleading with Alex to go faster and harder, her body tensing in preparation for its impending release.

"Oh, Baby…Al…I…I…Ohhhh…" Olivia shuddered around the appendage, her orgasm intense, her aftershocks seemed never ending, Alex moaned from her own release but continued to pump in and out of Olivia until her jerking ceased. Alex collapsed next to Olivia, the two women panting, the dildo still standing at attention, wet from Olivia's sex, Alex's thighs coated with her own incitement.

"Please tell me…" Olivia tried, still out of breath, "…that won't ever stop."

"Not on your life," Alex promised. "They'll have to peel me off of you in the nursing home when we're ninety."

The women giggled and Alex slid closer to Olivia, resting her head on her ample, heaving chest. Olivia placed a kiss on Alex's damp head and the two women fell into a contented, satiated slumber.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N at the end!**

20

Olivia awoke to a ray of sunshine splayed across her face. She threw her arm over her eyes, squinting, and moaned as she shifted to body to turn her back to the intrusive glare. A certain soreness caused her to squeeze her thighs together, remembering the previous night and the pleasure she was brought by her future fiancé. Just thinking about it made her tingle all over again.

Alex had surprised her by bringing out that particular device. She couldn't deny her shock at the enormity of its size or the absolute carnal dominance it provided from the blonde. In all their time together in the years past, they had never used any toys. Last night, when she finally got it strapped on, Olivia couldn't deny her unwavering lust for the attorney. She had never felt so close or turned on by another in all of her life.

Before Alex was taken into WitSec, they had taken their time and waited a while, their sexual attraction building and building to a roaring boil, before becoming intimately involved. By the time Alex left, they had only been truly, exclusively dating for about eight months. Their relationship had progressed as colleagues, then friends, and then close friends, and then made their physical attraction known before plunging into the category of being a couple before it was all ripped away. Their love was slow, it was sweet, it was wonderful, and the sex they had back then only touched the surface of what would be.

But _now_, it was unlike anything Olivia could ever have imagined. Time had been good to both women. The comfort level between them was at an all-time high, their sensuality at its peak, their harmony as partners stronger than ever. They were closer now than Olivia had ever been with anyone in her entire life. The friendship, companionship, and sexual intimacy that she now had with her best friend was unparalleled. Olivia did not want to be apart from the beautiful blonde attorney—_ever_. She knew that much about her life, at the moment, was true.

Olivia rolled back onto her back and turned her head, only to see her girlfriend's side empty. She rose up on her elbows and looked to the balcony—no Alex. Upon closer inspection, she noticed an envelope on the blonde's pillow and she picked it up. It was a beautiful powder blue monogrammed envelope with a silver _A.C_. on the outside_._ Olivia smiled as she slipped the thin stationary paper from the enclosure.

Alex's beautiful, flared script stood out in black fountain ink:

_My Dear (Sexy Beast) Olivia,_

_I didn't want to wake you but I had to run a couple of errands. I received a call today from a landscaper my father called about repaving the outside entryway to the house. I am going to look at slate stone (exciting, I know) but should only be gone a couple of hours. Coffee is brewed upstairs and there is fresh fruit and toast ready for you. I'll be back soon._

_ All my love,_

_ Alex_

Olivia folded the note and smiled to herself. She placed it back into the envelope and lay back down, holding it to her chest and closing her eyes. She brought it to her nose and inhaled, still smiling, the paper smelling faintly of Alex's hand lotion and perfume. Breathing deeply, she turned onto her side.

She knew what she wanted to do before Alex returned. She didn't know how she would get there and make it happen but now was the only time. With Alex out and running errands, it was now or never.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Olivia remembered Alex saying something about perhaps going on a bike ride one day while they were there. She said the family had six bicycles for various purposes—trail riding, racing, etc.—and that she could use them any time she wanted. Olivia did a quick internet search and found out that the place she needed to go was only 4.9 miles away, was about 24 minutes by bike, and that the terrain was mostly flat. She normally jogged five miles every other day, so she knew she wouldn't have a problem with the ride. Besides, it was a beautiful day and she had a couple of hours to run her errand.

After having had a couple pieces of toast and some fruit, Olivia got dressed in her khaki shorts, white tank, and white sneakers, left a note for Alex, and then went out the front door front to investigate the storage shed where Alex had said the bikes were kept.

Once at the shed, Olivia took the key that she had placed in her pocket from the butler's pantry that was conveniently labeled "storage shed" and unlocked the padlock, pulling the silver latch forward and then and placing the key back in her pocket. She pushed the door and found a plethora of bikes, sleds, snow skis, water skis, lawn equipment and more. Hanging from the ceiling, she noticed four racing bikes with curved handles and very thin tires. Alex had told her once that her brother had been into marathon biking in his college days and even had dreams of trying out for the Tour de France. But a soccer injury left his knee damaged and he had to have a surgery that limited his ability to ride long distances.

Not wanting to take any chances on the gravel or run the risk of falling or having a tire pop, she opted to find a bike with thicker tires. Off to the right, she saw a red mountain bike and a silver all-terrain bike with a straw basket on the front and a tiny bell—probably Alex's or her mother's. She tested the tires on both and decided the silver one had better tire pressure and wouldn't need to be filled with air. She took the bike out of the shed, put the padlock on the latch and secured it, hopped on the bike with ease, pulled out the directions she had written down, and set off on Meadow Lane.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex gazed through the clear cases in front of her, amazed at the beauty of the jewels. She had seen diamonds many times in her life, even owned a couple of pieces given to her by family but, knowing that these diamonds would be on the hand of her wife for the rest of their lives together, had her questioning any decision about which ring to choose. One was too large and flashy for work, while another was definitely too small and didn't fit Olivia's personality or the love Alex had for the detective.

A man of much shorter stature than Alex approached. "Good morning, Miss. My name is Marcel. Is there anything special I can show you today?"

"Well, Marcel, I am shopping for an engagement ring today."

"Well, he's a very lucky man to have such a beautiful woman as you."

"Thank you, Marcel. It's the lucky woman, though, and _I'm_ the lucky one."

Marcel nodded, a slight smirk on his face, his lips pursed. It seemed everyone they'd come in contact with in Southampton had a slight fetish for two women being in a relationship. "Very nice, Miss…?"

"Cabot. Alexandra Cabot."

"Of Cabot, McMartin, and Lowe?"

"The very one. I'm his daughter." Alex smiled. It wasn't unusual for people of the town to recognize her last name. The Cabots had practiced law in town for over four generations.

"Are you also an attorney, Ms. Cabot?"

"That, I am, Marcel."

"It's a pleasure, Ms. Cabot." He moved behind the counter and Alex continued to stand on the customer side. "Well, these are our engagement rings." He motioned to where Alex had previously been browsing. "Take your time. This is a big decision."

"Don't I know it, Marcel." Alex perused the rings slowly.

The attorney considered all the things Olivia did with her hands at work—the things she had to do with handcuffs, holding a gun, strapping a Kevlar™ vest on, wrestling sleazebags to the wall, slamming their heads onto tables—and opted for something sturdy yet delicate. The moment her eyes landed on a Solitaire Princess Cut Diamond ring, she knew she had found the one. Her eyes began tearing instantly.

That's the one…right there." She pointed. "Can I see that one?" She sniffed, taking a tissue from her jacket pocket.

"But of course, Miss Cabot." Marcus pulled out the tray holding the ring that she was instantly drawn to. Taking a small cloth, he lifted the ring from the tray and began rubbing it through the fabric, polishing it for Alex.

He handed it to her, "It's a simply beautiful and classic ring."

Alex sniffed, taking the ring delicately in her fingers, "And that's exactly what she is—simply beautiful and classic." She couldn't control the tears welling up in her eyes.

"Is it sturdy? I mean, she has a physically demanding job that requires her to be extremely active."

"Oh?"

"Yes, she's a police officer—a detective actually—so she needs something that can withstand day to day duties."

"This one is one of the best made rings, guaranteed against chips, tarnish, scratches, or lost stones. We have a lifetime guarantee."

"So do I, Marcus…" Alex mused, smiling. Placing it on her left ring finger, she smiled, her eyes tearing again.

She knew the moment she saw Olivia nine years ago that she had to have her, body and soul, just like the moment she saw the ring. Both were undeniably obvious to her. Without another moment's thought she smiled broadly and said, looking at Marcus without hesitation, "I'll take it."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Mapquest lied.

_Flat terrain, my ass_, Olivia thought. Her huffing and puffing was causing a burning in her chest, being hunched over was causing a pain in between her shoulder blades, and the hard, plastic bicycle seat was like a vice grip on her nether regions. But she persevered, knowing she was close when she saw a busy street, and buildings and stores.

Ike's Corner Store was the first building that she came across and, being rather parched, she hopped off of her bike, walked it to the door and leaned it against the store window. She went inside quickly and purchased a large bottle of Evian® and exited, walking her bike to a bench and putting the kickstand down before sitting.

She was suddenly distressed thinking about the perfect ring. She wanted it to be perfect and suit Alex and her tastes. Olivia felt she knew the blonde attorney better than most but there was a part of her that was afraid the ring she chose wouldn't be enough. Alex deserved the best there was and the brunette wanted to give it to her.

The establishment she was looking for was, according to her map, supposed to be about ten stores up the street. As she drank from her bottle, she thought about the huge decision that she was about to make. It was the absolute right decision, Olivia had no doubt, but an enormous decision, nonetheless. Her eyes submitted to her nerves and they began tearing mercilessly. She loved Alex so very much—more than anything she had ever loved in her life. Even being without her for a couple of hours pained her. She wanted to be able to talk to, touch, kiss, and tease and be with her girlfriend every moment that she could.

Olivia was not immune to the fact that reality would soon hit both of them with their return to the city—their jobs, being busy, cranky, tense and touchy, taking cases that took days on little to no sleep or nourishment. They still hadn't talked about Olivia returning to work or even if she would, at all. Everything was perfect and wonderful right now and Olivia did not want it to end.

Purposing to Alex was simply the most perfect thing to do. It felt right, it seemed right, it _was_ right. With every fiber of her being she wanted Alex as her wife.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex exited the Jill Lynn Jewelers beaming, the small, velvet box tucked away safely in her purse. She couldn't help but smile from ear to ear. She entered her convertible and took the box out of her purse, took the ring out and placed it on her own ring finger once again as she held it low against her jeans leg. She watched it catch the light, admiring it once again.

_Olivia Benson is going to be my wife. _

The blonde almost squealed with excitement. Finding some semblance of control and trying not to sit and stare at the ring all day, she put it back in the box. Besides, she would soon be able to look at it on the hand of the woman she loved anytime she wished.

Tonight was the bonfire. She and Olivia had decided they would go as they talked at dinner the previous evening, but Alex specifically wanted to go to show the world that Olivia was hers—specifically Southampton. She wanted to show those adolescent, unyielding boys that she was with Olivia and that if they ever crossed paths again, their flirting would be futile. Sure it was fun for a moment, but Olivia was hers and she wanted to yell it from the mountaintops—or, in this case, the shores of Southampton.

But there was one more thing Alex wanted to buy. She had seen a sexy little sundress dress on the drive into town that she had been fantasizing about seeing Olivia wear. She knew that when her girlfriend put it on, she wouldn't be able to keep her hands off of the brunette, and that was the goal at the bonfire. Alex would show everyone who Olivia belonged to—a sort of slow seduction. She started her ignition, pulled onto the street, drove a couple of streets over and parked in front of the small boutique. The dress was still in the window.

Alex knew just how she would show those boys.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Olivia walked the bike further up the street until she was standing in front of Jill Lynn Jewelers. Her hands kept slipping off the handles, a light sheen of moisture from her tension at choosing the best ring evident, and she also felt like she really needed to pee. It was all apprehension, though. She had never bought an engagement ring, much less any jewelry for any other person in her life, least of all someone she was head over heels in love with.

The nerves, she knew, were her fears of not picking out the perfect ring. It had to be as beautiful and sophisticated as Alex.

She leaned the bike against a tree right outside the store, wiped her palms against her shorts, and walked up to the door, pushing it open, the bells chiming at her entrance.

A man dressed in a very nice suit greeted her right away. "Good morning, Miss. How can I be of assistance to a beautiful lady, such as yourself, today?"

"Hello," Olivia began, smiling. "I would like to see your engagement rings."

"Of course," the man replied. "Any particular style or cut?"

"Something elegant, sophisticated, beautiful…but something that is career friendly, if that makes sense."

"Yes, of course, Miss. If I may ask, what career is this other person in?"

"She's an attorney," Olivia smiled.

"Oh, it seems we're popular with attorneys today."

"Huh," Olivia commented, distracted by the fine jewelry. She looked at the case that the man had gone around the counter to stand behind. "These are our engagement rings. My name is Marcel. Please have a look and take your time. This is quite a big day for you."

Olivia looked at Marcel, her face straight, her nerves returning. She took a deep breath before answering. "Thank you, Marcel."

"What is it that _you_ do?" Marcel asked Olivia.

"I am a detective for the NYPD," she said, her voice quiet as she continued to concentrate.

"It seems detectives are popular, as well…" He smirked. "And your name, Miss?"

Olivia shook her head and smiled, peeling her eyes away from the rings. "I'm sorry, Marcel. They're so beautiful. My name is Olivia."

"Well it's nice to meet you Olivia. Take your time looking and let me know if there is anything you'd like to see."

Olivia nodded, her gaze returning to the rings. They were all so beautiful. Olivia had never seen this many diamonds within a square foot radius in her life. There must have been over a million dollars worth of diamonds in that case alone.

Olivia's eyes stopped on a ring that screamed Alex Cabot. It was a round diamond in the center with tiny diamonds encircling it and the thin, platinum band was also encircled with diamonds. Before she realized it, Olivia felt her cheeks become wet. She touched her skin, feeling the foreign wetness, not even realizing she had begun crying.

Her knees buckled underneath her as Marcel stepped in, seemingly out of nowhere, and grabbed her by the waist.

"Miss Olivia, here have a seat." He guided her to a chair that was only a foot away.

Olivia found her composure and her words, barely. "I…I…this is the one, right here." She reached over and pointed at the ring that had her heart jumping for joy. She watched, almost mesmerized, as Marcel went back around the counter and removed the tray and the ring, polishing it to a shine before handing it to Olivia.

As the detective reached for it, she noted the unsteadiness in her hand. She took another deep breath and let it out, not wanting to drop it. She smiled at Marcel, still feeling her warm tears streaking her face. She fought not to let her face contort with emotion but it was pointless.

Hands still shaking, she slipped it on her ring finger and held her hand out to admire the beautiful creation, her sobbing intensifying. "It's absolutely perfect," she whispered, her other hand over her mouth.

She looked up at Marcel. "This is the one…" She looked back down at the ring. "It's perfect…"

Alex would love it. Of that she had no doubt.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

**A/N: I need a little advice. When would you like the proposals? Separately, together? In front of others? Alone? Any suggestion would be appreciated!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you for all of my new followers and my followers who continue to leave feedback and communication. I am so very much enjoying writing these characters. I wish I could join them in Southampton but, alas, I cannot. So, I can only be inside their heads.**

**Next up: THE BONFIRE! What will Alex do to show everyone Olivia is hers? What does the sundress look like? Will Olivia be able to function knowing of her impending proposal?**

**Stay tuned!**

**Patricia**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N at the end with links to my ideas of what the bonfire outfits look like, if interested!**

21

Alex looked up from leaning against the kitchen counter, reading the note Olivia had left there. She smiled to herself, Olivia's simple, practical handwriting almost geometric in perfection. She looked up as she heard the front door downstairs open and close, waiting for her girlfriend to walk in. She placed the note back on the counter and smiled, listening as Olivia bounded up the stairs and entered the kitchen.

"There's my baby…I got your note. Have a nice ride?" Alex asked as she walked up to Olivia as the brunette placed her cross-body purse on the counter.

Thankfully, Alex had just finished hiding Olivia's ring on the top shelf of a cabinet in the butler's pantry moments before Olivia arrived.

"Sure did…just out for some fresh air and exercise. It's a beautiful day, isn't it?" She wrapped her arms around Alex, clasping her hands behind the blonde's back. Olivia leaned in for a kiss, parting her lips to allow the blonde access, and then began massaging Alex's tongue with her own.

Alex felt a tingle shoot straight to her core as Olivia pulled her pelvis closer and intensified the kiss. After a few breathless moments, Alex pulled back, her closed eyes rolling back in her head, before opening them. "You look even more like a tanned goddess than you did this morning while you were laying in bed…your gorgeous ass on display. Alex reached down to Olivia's backside and squeezed firmly, her mouth pressing against the detective's pulse point on her neck.

Olivia rolled her head to the side, groaning. "That's all I'm good for…my ass?"

"Oh no, sweetheart…" Alex leaned forward and pressed her lips to Olivia's cleavage, inhaling her perfume. She then flattened her tongue, licking the saltiness from in between her girlfriend's bosom. "You have many, many valuable qualities." Alex pulled away slightly and lifted the detective's tank over her head tossing it on the counter. She kissed the top of Olivia's left breast. "Many talents…" She kissed the top of her right breast. "Many gifts…" She pulled the lace down from the demi cup of her right breast and ran her tongue in a circular motion around the nipple, then flicked it before settling in wrapping her lips around it.

Olivia moaned her pleasure, closing her eyes and running her fingers through Alex's silky hair. "Al…"

Alex continued pleasuring Olivia's breast. "Yeah?"

"I gotta go…you know…" Olivia breathed.

"Well then, go…" Alex tried, pulling the left side of Olivia's bra down and giving her nipple the same attention.

"Uhhh….wow…shi—…uhhh…"

Alex pulled away and looked at Olivia, smiling. "Go to the bathroom, babe. I'll be right here."

Olivia kissed Alex softly yet quickly on the lips and smirked. "I'm gonna take a quick shower, too."

"Mmmm, sounds tempting…" Alex admitted.

Olivia kissed Alex once again before grabbing her purse and tank and heading downstairs to their bathroom.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Olivia was desperate to find a good hiding spot and quickly. She felt it was literally burning a hole in her purse. The implication was that Alex would most likely join her in the shower so she had to think fast. The women were not at all secretive about each other's clothing or belongings, so Olivia had to hide it somewhere Alex would never look. She remembered a spot in the study. There was a set of three brown, wicker baskets, stacked on top of each other, next to the window. It was a pyramid stack, with the larger basket being at the bottom.

Olivia jogged into the study and took the top two baskets off, setting them aside. She then reached into her purse and began to remove the small velvet box, her hand getting stuck from not unzipping it all the way. _Shit,_ she thought, as she heard Alex's footsteps descending the staircase. Finally, getting the box out, she lifted the lid of the bottom basket and placed the box inside, lidding it quickly, and then returning the other two baskets. She turned to leave just as she heard Alex call her name.

"Liv? Babe?" She appeared in the doorway. She smiled. A concerned look swept over her face. "You OK? You look flushed?"

"Yeah, no, I…haven't…I was just looking out the window to make sure the shed is locked. I can't see it from here, though." Olivia stuttered, pretending to look out of the window, squinting for effect, feigning concern for the lock.

Alex walked up to the brunette. "Don't worry about it." Alex slithered her arms around Olivia as the brunette turned in her arms, smiling. Alex kissed her neck savagely, her tongue lingering, teeth sinking into flesh. "You still wanna take a shower?" she mumbled against her neck. "I'll help."

Olivia looked into Alex's blue eyes as Alex began unbuttoning and unzipping Olivia's shorts, her thumbs pulling the waistband down and letting them fall, then working on doing the same with her white panties. Alex caught Olivia's mouth in a kiss as she simultaneously reached her fingers down to slide along her folds, causing Olivia to jump and moan, feeling a sudden rush of wetness. Olivia stepped out of her shorts and underwear and reached up to Alex's glasses, carefully removing them and placing them with her purse right next to them on the sofa.

Olivia thought of the ring and the fact that she would soon be engaged to the gorgeous woman standing in front of her. She tenderly touched Alex's cheeks with both hands, her light fingers lingering on the softness, and then moved to her lips, placing feather-light kisses on her mouth before moving along her jaw line. She looked into those blue pools, reading her soul, her love. Olivia could feel the saltiness of tears in her own eyes.

Alex looked concerned, "Babe?"

Olivia simply shook her head and whispered, "I love you so much." She placed her fingers underneath the hem of Alex's pale yellow linen shirt, touching her stomach with barely there fingers. She smiled, a coquettish expression crossing her face, "Why are _you_ always clothed and I'm always naked?"

Alex laughed. "My little peasant gypsy girl?" Alex began to help Olivia unbutton the linen shirt. "In my opinion, you should be naked all the time…" Alex continued.

Once the shirt was removed, Olivia reached around Alex and unclasped her bra while kissing her gently, assuredly, and tossing it aside as well. Alex reached down to Olivia's wetness again, letting her finger ever so slightly slip inside, stroking her more firmly, showing the detective her intentions. "You're so wet, Liv…"

"Only you, Al…" Olivia tried, but her resolve to pleasure Alex was first beginning to falter as she rested her forehead against the front of Alex's shoulder and concurrently tugged at the jeans she had just unbuttoned. After sliding them down, she deftly removed her underwear in one quick movement, causing Alex to gasp from the sudden exposure.

Part of Olivia wanted to take this slowly and part of her wanted it quick and rough, carnal and predatory. She would have the rest of her life for both, she decided, as she proceeded to kneel in front of the smiling blonde, kissing her toned stomach, tonguing the silky skin, and making her way lower.

Alex's hands went to the top of Olivia's head, lightly stroking her tresses as the brunette continued her descent. Alex moaned when Olivia's tongue lightly darted against her clit and the brunette spread her lower lips with two fingers before moving in again.

"Gotta sit…" Alex tried, her head thrown back, her breathing becoming labored. Alex backed into the sofa, falling backwards, moving her hips to the edge, leaning fully back, beautiful ivory globes heaving, and watching Olivia. Alex smiled and bit her pinky finger in anticipation.

Olivia moved in once again and placed her elbows underneath the attorney's knees, drawing her closer still, her ass and sex now hovering over the floor. Alex crossed her ankles behind Olivia's neck as Olivia moved in, Alex moaning even before Olivia touched her. A shiny trail of excitement found its way out of the blonde and Olivia smiled, leaning in to lap it up, using long sweeping motions from the bottom of her slit to the top. Olivia continued to sweep in upward motions, her tongue entering further and further every time, finishing with a light sucking, flicking motion to the nub that's pleasure was building to be released.

Olivia looked up to see Alex, her head pressed back, mouth open, eyes closed as she grabbed Olivia's hair, pulling lightly. "Don't stop, Liv…feels so good…" she moaned, her voice deep and throaty.

Olivia began flicking her clit quickly, feeling Alex's thighs clenching the sides of her neck, the attorney's breathing erratic.

"Oh, Babe…I'm…ahhhh…" Alex arched up, lifting her core into Olivia's mouth as she came crashing down, her body trembling and contracting with release. "Uuuuhhhhh, _God_…!"

Olivia smiled as she continued her ministrations, waiting until Alex's body stopped bucking and her hands loosened in her hair, her body going slack. Olivia kissed her left thigh, then her right thigh, then lapped up the juices from Alex's recent release, still smiling as Alex continued to moan.

Olivia removed Alex's legs one by one from her shoulders and kissed her calves, placing her feet back on the ground before leaning forward and kissing her left, then right, hips.

Alex's eyes were still closed, her head back, but there was a definite smile on her face. Olivia stood, offering her hand to Alex and said, "Let's head for round two in the shower…"

Alex's eyes slowly opened and she reached for Olivia's hand, letting the brunette pull her up. "I love the way you think…"

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex had Olivia up against the tile wall opposite the shower head, her pelvis pressed tightly to the brunette, as the water hit Alex's back and lightly misted Olivia's face. Alex leaned into Olivia and kissed the water from her cheeks, her jaw, and then her lips, her tongue lingering, as she slipped her index finger inside the brunette. Olivia moaned as she lifted her leg to the ledge, allowing Alex better access. Alex placed opened, heated, kisses on Olivia's waiting mouth, running her tongue along the brunette's teeth and invading her mouth with her tongue, the detective returning the carnality. Olivia's eyes were closed, mostly, the rolled whites of her corneas seen through her slightly parted lids, as Alex slipped another finger into her heated warmth.

"Al…ex…," Olivia drew out, almost giving the attorney another orgasm on the spot.

Arousal filling her own groin once again, Alex softly commanded, "Turn around, Liv."

Olivia opened her eyes and smiled, obviously trusting whatever Alex had in mind.

The brunette obliged, and Alex took Olivia's hands and placed them on the wall in front of her, outstretched above her. Alex pressed her body to Olivia's toned backside firmly, almost abruptly, grabbing the detective's hips with force. Olivia hissed and then moaned as Alex's fingers found their way to back into Olivia's center, placing her two fingers inside her girlfriend once again. They began a rhythm, each woman's hips swirling in a circular motion, Olivia riding Alex's fingers and forcing Alex deeper.

"I want it all, Alex. Please…" Olivia whispered, her hips still gyrating onto Alex's hand.

"I don't want to hurt you…," Alex panted into her right ear, receiving her own pleasure at being pressed up to Olivia's grinding, immaculate, tanned backside.

"You won't, Babe." Olivia turned her head to catch Alex's lips in a gentle kiss, letting the attorney know it was OK.

Alex slipped a third finger inside her girlfriend as Olivia continued to lift and lower herself, moaning. Alex could feel her imminent release building, as well. A fourth finger was slipped inside of Olivia and the brunette cried out in pleasure, her gyrating continuing.

Alex could feel her own pleasure building as her clit rubbed against her girlfriend's toned ass, a wave of heated tingling passing through her at every pump of Olivia's hips. She brought her left hand around Olivia lay it flat against the detective's muscled abdomen, pulling Olivia even closer than she thought possible, the blonde's own nub now being stimulated even more intensely.

Knowing she was close from the warmth building once again in her core, Alex intensified her pumping fingers in and out of Olivia as the brunette continued to ride her hand. "I wanna come together, babe. Let go. Let me feel you come around me," she panted in her ear, biting and sucking her right lobe firmly.

Olivia moaned at these words and the sensation of Alex biting and sucking her ear. "Only you know how to fuck me like this," Olivia breathed, almost incoherent.

As Alex felt her girlfriend's body tightening around her hand and then releasing in a torrent of moans, spasms, Alex's pleasure was expelled, as well, and they continued undulating until they both completed their surrender to each other.

Alex rested her chin on Olivia's right shoulder, catching her breath, both hearts racing, both panting, eyes closed. Alex placed a soft kiss on Olivia's right cheek and began removing her fingers from the brunette.

"Wait…" Olivia pleaded, her eyes still closed, her face twisted in pleasure. Alex moved her fingers slightly, earning a soft gasp from Olivia. "There's…another one…" she squealed softly. Alex moved her fingers, curling them in just the right manner that had Olivia coming all over again. The brunette reached back with her left hand and held Alex's cheek as another climax quietly rolled through her body. "Oh, baby…," she whimpered, swirling her hips ever-so-slowly.

Alex felt Olivia's walls contracting once more as she simply held her girlfriend, waiting as she released again. Alex smiled to herself, kissing Olivia's neck.

This gorgeous, big-hearted woman, cumming in her arms, moaning her pleasure, getting off multiple times would soon be her wife.

And she couldn't wait.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

"Hey!" A male voice shouted enthusiastically. "Brittany…Trixie!"

Olivia giggled into Alex's shoulder as they walked toward the voice.

"Here we go," Alex mumbled, snickering as well.

The sun was setting low in the sky, dipping into the ocean as the two women walked through the sand, hand in hand. They had decided to walk from their house to the party, as it was only a quarter of a mile or so.

Approaching Olivia and Alex, Chris took Olivia by surprise and before she could resist, had her in a huge bear hug, lifting her off the ground, in the process. "Glad you could come!" he beamed, putting Olivia back down and then reaching for Alex.

Alex held her hands up in mock surrender. "That's OK, Chris."

Todd walked up to the trio. "Well, well, well…" he began, his eyes running over both women's ensembles. "We definitely have a party now." He licked his lips and reached for Alex's hand.

Alex simply smiled and nodded, clutching her white cardigan she was holding closer to her and tightening her grip on Olivia's arm—no interest in being cordial.

The women had decided, before they left the house, that they would go to the bonfire, partake in a couple of drinks, maybe listen to some of the music and sit by the fire, have a couple of s'mores—Olivia told Alex that she really _hoped_ they would have s'mores—and then cut out by, at the latest, midnight. Being so exhausted from their earlier love making sessions that had continued even after the shower, both women were rather spent and wanted to simply get a good night's sleep lying in each other's arms.

Alex had decided to go without her trademark glasses for the evening, and wore a strapless coral ankle-length maxi dress, with a simple long gold and coral pendant necklace that hit at her belly button.

Olivia wore the dress that Alex had purchase for her—a royal, almost navy blue, chiffon, long sleeved dress with peek-a-boo sleeves that hit at the upper thigh, her tan peeking through long slits in the arms, muscular tanned thighs exposed ever so exquisitely, a tasteful gold chevron necklace adorning her bronze glow and elegant, kissable collarbone. She had chosen to wear a white string bikini underneath because of the length—or lack thereof, just in case wind gusts, by some freak of nature, managed to generate.

Both women, freshly showered—for the second time that day—perfumed skin, hair down and barefoot, were completely comfortable and satiated after a wonderful afternoon of spending time together.

The boys, as promised, wore board shorts with various patterns on them and flip flops, beers in their hands.

"What, ladies? No bathing suits?" Todd questioned.

"We weren't planning on swimming, Todd." Alex answered. "We've had a rather tiring day…" Alex slipped her arm around Olivia's waist, clasping it tightly.

Chris began, "Well, let's get you ladies a drink and we can talk about your day. What would you like?" He looked at Olivia.

"What do you have?"

"We have mixed drinks over there at the tiki bar, bottled beers, and some wine coolers." He pointed as he spoke. "My boy Hector will get you hooked up."

"Any white wine, Todd? Or is it all frat party drinks?" Alex's voice was even. She felt Olivia squeeze her waist and then the brunette leaned her head into Alex's shoulder, smiling, kissing it gently.

"Sorry. We didn't think to get any regular wine." Chris almost looked ashamed.

"Don't worry about it," Olivia said. "I'll get you a drink, Babe. I'll surprise you." She leaned forward and kissed Alex on the lips before turning and walking towards the bar.

"Awwww, yeah…" Todd replied.

Alex glared at Todd, pulling her now-empty arms closer to her.

"So…Trixie…tell me more about what it is you do back home, and…where is back home?"

Alex sighed, resigned to talking to Todd until Olivia came back with the drinks. "We live in Manhattan. I am an attorney with the—," She stopped herself before she actually told the truth. "…with the Parks & Wildlife Commission." She smiled, impressed that she could come up with a lie so quickly.

"Oh…" Todd thought for a moment. "…so you like work with animals and stuff?"

Alex narrowed her eyes, considering Todd's answer. Surely he wasn't serious. She decided to humor him. "Yes, Todd. I work with animals. I'm an attorney that works with animals. That's what I do." Alex was feeling facetious. "I talk to the animals and let them know their rights and then I hear their side of the story and then I represent them in court." Alex had to bite her cheek to keep from laughing.

Todd looked fascinated. "That's _awesome_!" he stated.

_This is going to be a long couple of hours_, Alex noted.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Olivia pulled the two drinks that Hector made for both Alex and herself closer to her on the counter of the bar, but not before the bartender blatantly let his attraction to the sultry brunette known. He had ogled her while mixing the drinks, his eyes running up and down her body and he actually asked her if she had plans after the bonfire.

"Actually, I _do_ have plans, Hector," Olivia smiled, looking down as she stirred the drinks with the tiny straws. She looked up and turned. "See that gorgeous blonde over there, with the sexy body?" Olivia pointed.

"Yeah…I do."

"Well, Hector. We've had quite a tiring day of fucking like rabbits and we're probably going to just go to sleep after this party."

Hector's face turned pale, his eyes wide.

Olivia smiled. "Thanks for the drinks." She turned and headed towards Todd and her girlfriend.

There were about twenty-five or thirty people at the beach that night. Standing around, talking, sitting on the logs around the campfire, some in various stages of making out and/or hooking up, others simply talking and drinking. The tinny sound of Bob Marley was playing somewhere in the background as a few people danced. It definitely had the feel of a frat party, as it was mostly a college-aged crowd, some mid-twenties; Olivia and Alex were probably the most mature women there.

Olivia handed Alex her drink. "Thanks, Babe." Alex took a sip. "Cranberry?"

"Seabreeze." Olivia stated. "I remember you liking it once, a long time ago." Olivia and Alex gazed at each other, both in recognition of the event that the detective spoke about.

_December 2000:_

_It had been a party given by a mutual friend that so happened to be one of Olivia's exes. Alex had been there, much to Olivia's surprise—she didn't know Alex was gay—and she was drinking her usual white wine. Olivia, after over an hour of simply catching eyes with the blonde attorney and smiling shyly, finally got the nerve to go up to her and talk. They had only met once at work, as Alex had just started working at SVU._

_Alex had asked what Olivia was drinking and it was a Seabreeze. Olivia asked her if she wanted to try it and the blonde took a sip, liking it instantly. The two women ended up talking all night, until they were the last guests there. Nothing else happened that night, but the night was sweet and memorable._

"I remember," Alex whispered, her voice shaky.

Olivia put her free arm around Alex's waist, pulling her close as she kissed the side of her head. Alex rested her head on Olivia's.

Todd and Chris simply watched them, very obviously still under the impression that there was a chance.

Chris broke the silence, "So how did you spend the day? You said you were tired. The beach?"

Olivia looked at Alex, smirking. "Babe? Wanna take this?"

Alex smiled, "Sure, honey…well, boys…we spent the day in bed."

Chris nodded. "Weren't feeling well?"

"Oh, no…we were feeling quite well. In fact, probably the best I've ever felt in my life. How about you, sweetie." Alex looked at Olivia.

"I think I'd have to say that my body had never felt better. All thanks to you…" Olivia lowered her face and softly kissed Alex's lips."

The look on Chris and Todd's faces were classic—a mixture of wonderment and defeat.

Surely, it had gotten through now…

"So…" Chris began. You really _are_ together? We thought that was just a joke to get us to leave you alone because of our age differences."

Todd spoke, "That is _so_ hot…" he was absolutely dumbfounded.

Alex replied, "Yes, Todd it _is_ _so _hot." She faced Olivia, "So _very_ hot." Olivia and Alex eyed each others' lips, the carnality growing. Alex leaned into Olivia, placing a gentle kiss on her mouth before parting her lips and pressing for entrance. Olivia opened her mouth wide as Alex pushed inside, breathing intensifying. Olivia held her drink out for one of the boys to take and one of them took it—she couldn't see which one. Olivia grabbed Alex's drink and did the same.

The kiss turned heated, carnal, hands roaming in hair, on bodies, lips searching, tongues probing, faces flushing. After a few moments, Olivia pulled away first, Alex leaning forward with closed eyes, obviously not wanting it to end. Olivia smiled as she wiped a bit of stray lipstick from Alex's lower lip and then quickly, softly pecked her lips, Alex's eyes still closed. Olivia laughed, "Babe?"

Alex finally opened her eyes, pure lust in them. Alex held Olivia's waist firmly. "This sexy cougar is _all_ mine, boys…like I said the other day at the restaurant…_forever_."

The women, still holding on to each other, now looked at Chris and Todd. Olivia noted a certain excitement evident in their shorts. Olivia snickered and then embraced Alex, laughing into her shoulder.

Alex spoke again, "We're getting married, boys…"

"But, how come I don't see any rings…?" Chris tried.

Todd added, "Do lesbians buy rings?"

"Oh…" Alex pressed her forehead and nose to her girlfriend's, "…that's coming _very soon_, isn't it, Babe?"

Olivia smiled, suddenly incredibly nervous. _Did Alex know?_ She tried to relay her confidence with a big, toothy smile. "Yes, it is…" Olivia's heart was now pounding out of her chest. _Had Alex seen her hide the ring? Did she see her in town? Does she know?_

Olivia decided to get another drink. She knew, now, she was definitely going to need it.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

About an hour later, Alex and Olivia found themselves sitting on a large piece of driftwood, facing the darkened sky and listening to the ocean. The band had begun to play behind them and was actually quite good with their acoustic cover of Kings of Leon's _Use Somebody_.

"I love this song…" Olivia whispered, leaning her head against Alex's shoulder.

Alex took Olivia's hand into her lap, feeling the effects of two and a half Seabreezes. She knew that this particular cup—which she had been nursing for the past hour—would be her last. Olivia, having had the same amount seemed quieter than usual as they both stared into the darkness, the brunette's eyes glazed over. Alex kissed Olivia's temple. "You OK?"

"Mmmm," Olivia answered. "Yeah, just tired and a little tipsy…" Olivia lifted her head from Alex's shoulder and looked into her eyes.

Alex reveled in the deep chocolate orbs looking back at her as the attorney moved a wavy piece of hair behind the detective's ear.

Olivia looked worried, or was it just exhaustion? Perhaps the brunette was just tired.

They had been quite busy—_gotten_ busy, really—for the majority of the afternoon before napping in each other's arms. Then, around five they showered, made a dinner of angel hair pasta primavera, and then relaxed on the kitchen balcony enjoying each other's conversation before getting ready for the party.

"You wanna head back to the house?" Alex tried, almost apprehensively, concerned about her lover's apparent distance.

Olivia slithered her arms around Alex, squeezing her tightly from next to her. "If you want…if you're tired, too…"

Alex smiled, suddenly worried that she and Olivia weren't on the same page. Olivia was one to run from commitment, she had expressed that herself. Rather than hurt people, she ran. She had told Alex this on numerous occasions. Maybe Olivia was now thinking of running. Alex would not be able to handle if Olivia ran. It would ruin her world, her life, the meaning of love as she knew it.

Alex felt her eyes begin to sting with tears.

Olivia noticed. "Hey…" she wiped a stray tear from Alex's cheek. "Al?"

Alex shook her head and leaned in to softly press her lips against Olivia's. She pulled away slowly and opened her eyes. "I just don't know how I'd ever live without you, Liv. Life, without you in it, would be so damn difficult. I don't know how I did it before you came back into my life. But…"

Olivia's face still showed fear. "But what, Alex?" Her expression turned steely, as though bracing herself.

Alex hesitated, "It's just…you seemed surprised when I mentioned that we were getting engaged to Todd and Chris." A wave of panic ran through Alex's body at the thought. "When I mentioned a ring…you seemed…don't you want to have rings? Or is that too much?"

Olivia looked out across the moonlit water. "What do _you _want?" she questioned.

Alex whispered, "I want it _all_, Liv—the rings, the marriage, the kids, the dogs. I've told you that. I want you to be my wife until the end of time."

Olivia's eyes watered mercilessly, tears falling almost immediately as she continued staring ahead. Alex knelt in front of Olivia, holding her hands in the detective's lap. "Olivia…what is it? You're scaring me."

Olivia looked into Alex's eyes, her voice a tiny whimper, "I am scared, Alex. I'm scared that this isn't real. That I am in some sort of waking dream. That the clock is going strike twelve and I'm going to open my eyes and it will be 2004 again and you'll be taken away again and it will be like none of this ever even happened. The past week and a half has been the best time I have ever spent of my life. I thank God every day that you were brought back to me.

Alex squeezed Olivia's hands and brought them to her mouth, kissing them gently.

Olivia continued, "When I was a little girl, around seven or eight, I told myself that I wanted better. I wanted better than a life of drinking, stumbling around, cursing, and throwing things. I wanted more than holidays spent in the dark, holding my dolls to my chest, crying while my mother slept off another bender. I told myself I would know love and find love and love another. Even at that age, I knew there was something better.

Olivia's face twisted with emotion as she placed her hand to Alex's cheek. "And then I found you." She leaned in and kissed Alex quickly, yet softly. "My sweet Alex, my love. You are my everything. You are in my every waking thought. You can't seem to be close enough to me or around me enough, even when you are with me, I want more."

"Oh, Babe. You are my all, too. When they called me from the DAs office two weeks ago and asked me to fill in for SVU, I had only one emotion—joy." Alex cupped Olivia's jaw in both hands. "And this is real. I promise you. As much as it seems like a fairy tale, it is real. I am scared, too. I am scared that I won't be enough for you—that I am somehow not deserving of your love. Your heart is so big; I've seen it at work with victims, I've seen it up close and personal with me."

Alex ran her thumbs along Olivia's lips, Olivia closing her eyes and kissing them tenderly. Olivia cupped Alex's neck and the two women stayed like that for a few moments.

"Liv, I want to marry you because I want _this_ all the time—what we had today, have had this past week, is perfection. I have never felt this way about anyone else, either. There's a pull, a magnetism that I can't even control…"

Olivia nodded, unable to speak, her mouth twisted with emotion.

"Let's go home, Baby." Alex stood and held her hand out to Olivia. "I want to start our lives together as soon as is humanly possible."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAO

**A/N: What did that mean? When will the proposals happen? **

**Everyone who responded about the proposals said they should have them by themselves. Those will happen soon. Very soon. **

**I wanted to include a bit of reality in this. When you have a secret, you get a little paranoid that everyone knows. With these ladies' history, especially Olivia's, she is even more hesitant than your average person. She is afraid it's too good to be true.**

**What I imagine with the Campfire/Bonfire dresses:**

**Olivia's bonfire dress: **

SKU: YC0655425

**Alex's bonfire dress:**

SKU 8352773 (but in coral)

**Next up, gotta have the proposals, the dinner party, discussion about returning and what will happen, then, of course (sadly) an ending. Some of you have me pumped for a sequel, though. I am thinking maybe a reality show type one-shot idea—little blurbs and scenarios of their lives together.**

**I would love to hear what you think.**

**Also, I love Danny Pino and that dark on dark action with he and Olivia is another favorite ship. That will most likely happen as well.**

**Also, Kings of Leon had their hit that year in 2009, along with Sex on Fire. So, the songs are historically accurate ;)**


	22. Chapter 22

22

At 10:13 a.m., Olivia padded up the stairs, rubbing her eyes and yawning, as she entered the kitchen wearing grey boy shorts, a sheer white tank, and a black hoodie haphazardly thrown through the arms to beat the chill in the morning air. She entered to see Alex sitting on the veranda, legs crossed, her beige silk robe parted at her toned mid-thighs, sipping from a mug. The breakfast table was set, a basket covered with a cloth napkin, fresh chunked pineapple and strawberries in a bowl, butter, strawberry jam, and a pot of French press coffee sitting on the table.

Olivia could see the attorney deep in thought, black frames perched above her cute nose, her mug hovering just in front of her mouth, a smile on her face. Olivia walked to the screen door, folded her arms, and leaned against the frame, simply watching as her girlfriend gazed out across the expanse of blue ocean.

Alex's long hair was down, perfectly in place. Olivia admired the flawless, ivory skin of her face and neck, those milky thighs and legs that went on for days, full pink lips, those intense gorgeous blue eyes thinking, mesmerized by one of the many thoughts in her brilliant mind.

Her intelligence was just one of the things about Alex that was the most attractive to Olivia. She had the quick wit and sharp tongue unlike anyone Olivia had ever known. In the courtroom she could be relentless, not backing down, making a witness cry just from one word. Olivia loved that—found it incredibly sexy.

But there was also an immense softness to the blonde—a kindness in her words as they spoke of love and sweet nothings and the future—the words that caused the butterflies in Olivia's belly to flutter just from a look, a sigh, a gasp, a moan, and every time the attorney said her name.

And, God, did Olivia love her sense of humor. One, dry, sarcastic remark or joke could have Olivia rolling with laughter, able to think back throughout the day and remember that one comment the hilarious blonde had said and laugh over and over.

The detective had it bad. She was absolutely, completely in love with the gorgeous attorney. There was no turning back and there wasn't a damn thing the brunette could do about it. She was in deep.

Alex looked up and smiled to find Olivia watching her. The detective grinned as well. "Are you now my stalker?" Alex kidded. Olivia went out onto the balcony and Alex patted her lap, motioning for the brunette to sit. Olivia sat sideways, one arm on Alex's back and the other intertwined with the attorney's. "If only all stalkers looked like you…they wouldn't be considered stalkers anymore…just sexy peeping Toms."

Alex parted her lips and kissed Olivia, tonguing her gently. The kiss was soft, gentle—pure love.

Olivia knew that today was the day. It was the day that she would ask this beautiful woman to be engaged to her and to marry her. She couldn't fight the nerves that rolled throughout her body. She almost felt ill.

"Babe? No talking today?" Alex questioned.

Olivia felt tears begin to prick her eyes. She stroked Alex's cheek and then leaned in, kissing her girlfriend once more. "Good morning," Olivia finally said, her voice trembling.

Alex reached behind Olivia and underneath the detective's hair, holding the base of her head and massaging her scalp lightly. Olivia closed her eyes, enjoying the sensation. "So, I was thinking…the party is tonight…the cleaning team has a key and is coming at 12 and the people to lay the slate walkway are coming at 1. We can have breakfast here, go into town, pick up a few supplies, maybe get some ice cream, walk around until 12:45, come back and make sure the walkway guys know what to do, shower, and then have the rest of the evening until 7 to get ready for the party."

They hadn't really talked about the party. Time seemed to have slipped away from them since Olivia had called everyone. The only thing they had really spoken about was that it would be around seven on Friday and, after speaking with the guests, it was agreed they would be staying over, as there was plenty of room in the _compound _to accommodate everyone who needed to stay the night. All were coming except for Cragen, who couldn't get away fro the evening. A temp squad at the precinct for the weekend ensured that rest of the squad could come, including M.E. Warner and her husband.

"What are we cooking?" Olivia asked.

"I was thinking we could grill some steaks, chicken, and salmon? I have a great recipe for twice baked potatoes and a to-die-for coleslaw recipe of my grandmother's. Also, we could light that campfire circle you saw on the beach, have one of the men bring some firewood from next to the shed, and sit on chairs around it? What do you think?"

"I think it sounds wonderful." Olivia noted the excitement in Alex's voice and it made her heart swell. She took the attorney's left hand again, holding it up and interlacing her fingers. The ring would look beautiful on her slender, pale fingers. She couldn't wait to see it there.

"Liv?"

Olivia was snapped out of her thoughts and looked at a smiling Alex. She grinned back.

"You hungry? We have croissants and fruit inside."

"Yeah," she cleared her throat, hearing the nervous scratch in her voice. "I'm famished, actually."

"Well, let's have some breakfast and then we can go." Alex kissed Olivia quickly before Olivia stood and pulled the attorney with her.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

The women sat at the table and Alex poured Olivia a cup of coffee. "I like that outfit you have on there…" Alex looked at the sheerness of Olivia's tank, admiring her erect nipples pushing through, and then smirked before refilling her own cup and placing the coffee pot on the table.

"I like your legs in that robe," Olivia continued, pouring cream into her coffee and stirring. "Your ass isn't bad, either."

Alex held the basket out to Olivia. "Croissant?"

"Of course," Olivia moved the cloth napkin from the croissants and was met with a small velvet box. "Wh—?"

Alex smiled, reaching for the box and lifting it from the basket, her hand shaking. God was she nervous. She had never seen her hand tremor this badly before, even during her most difficult cases. She looked at Olivia, who looked like she was about to either pass out or throw up, she couldn't tell. Alex put the box on the table and took Olivia's hands in her own. Olivia's lower lip began to tremble, her eyes filling with tears.

Olivia shook her head, as if to say _no, this can't be happening_, her face twisting with emotion.

Alex laughed lightly, "Yes, Babe…" She cupped Olivia's cheek with her hand, stroking her cheek before holding their hands in the brunette's lap. "When I met you nine years ago, I felt something for you. I wasn't sure what it was, but I knew I wanted more of that feeling. Was it me just thinking that this bad-ass detective with the gorgeous lips and eyes and hot body was sexy? Yes, that was part of it." The women laughed before Alex continued, tears now streaming down both women's faces.

"Was it the way you looked at me that made me want to get to know you, to earn your love, to enter your world and your soul? Yes. Was it your huge heart and how I watched you work for justice to help and save countless numbers of people? Without a doubt."

"Is it the way you make me want to literally devour you every time I see you?" Her voice broke. "Yes…that and more."

Alex kneeled in front of Olivia, taking her hands in her own. "If you'll be my wife, I promise you I will spend the rest of my life making you the happiest woman in the world, as you've made me."

Alex reached up to the table and took the box in her still trembling hands, removing the delicate ring. She took a small breath, looking at Olivia with pure intensity. Alex smiled as she took Olivia's left hand in her own. Her voice shook as she worked hard to get the question out clearly, without sobbing, "Liv…will you marry me, Baby?"

Olivia nodded quickly, emphatically, her eyes and nose running relentlessly as Alex slipped the ring on the detective's finger. As they embraced, Olivia whispered, "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes…" Then pulled away and kissed Alex so securely, so resolutely, Alex had no question.

Olivia wiped her eyes and looked at the ring, "God, Alex, it's gorgeous." She grabbed the blonde's face and kissed her again, tongues caressing, mouths parting. Olivia pulled away first and waited for Alex's eyes to open slowly.

Olivia held up her index finger and then reached into the right pocket of her hoodie, smiling, her eyes not leaving Alex. She took the small velvet box out. Now it was Alex's turn to choke up.

Olivia slid down onto the floor and kneeled, sitting on her feet as Alex was. She opened the box and Alex gasped. _What had Olivia done_? It was so absolutely exquisite. Alex reached for Olivia's face and then looked back at the ring as Olivia took it from the box.

Olivia shook her head again but, this time, she was smiling. "I don't even know what I can say to you that I haven't been telling you for the past two weeks other than…you _do_ make me the happiest woman in the world. When I'm with you, life is worth living. The sun is brighter, the air is fresher, the birds sing more beautifully, coffee tastes better, sex is more intense and satisfying than it's ever been in my life..." Olivia smirked. "You bring joy to me in ways I never thought possible. If I lost everything in this world—money, job, house—I would be fine if I still had you…" Olivia took Alex's still trembling hand into her own, looking her in the eyes. "Alex, baby, please say you'll be with me for the rest of our lives, that we'll be in the convalescent home together, snuggling on the sofa, drinking our Ensure and Centrum Silver, and talking about how good our sex was years ago and how hot we used to be…"

Alex laughed. Both women's eyes were running mercilessly. "Olivia Benson, marrying you would be the highest honor in my life thus far. I will absolutely be your wife."

Olivia fought for composure as she slipped the ring onto Alex's elegant finger. Alex leaned into Olivia and pressed her lips against the brunette, feeling her tremble beneath her. "We're getting married," Alex whispered against Olivia's mouth.

"I love you, Alex…I love you so much, baby." The women found themselves standing and then walking downstairs, where they made love, eager to share their newfound commitment, express their devotion and passion, and their promise to each other as a newly engaged couple.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

"I plan on being hot when I'm pushing one-hundred." Alex said, licking the double scoop butter pecan ice cream cone she had gotten from Southampton Carvel Ice Cream Shoppe, as she and Olivia strolled down Main Street.

"Oh, I don't doubt you'll be one sexy hundred-year-old, babe. But you know…" Olivia spooned her own mint chocolate chip, putting another bite in her mouth, "I probably won't be around when you're one-hundred, I am sorry to say, unless one-hundred ten is the new eighty, so you better not remarry."

Alex laughed. "Never…I'll just have to wait to join you again. You'd better be waiting for me at the pearly gates."

"I'll be waiting wearing the outfit God gave me."

"And what a beautiful outfit it is…"

As they walked, they playfully bumped into and nudged into each other, enjoying the beautiful, sunny day and their playful banter.

Olivia held up her left hand as they walked. "I can't believe it, Al. We're actually engaged." Olivia stopped, facing Alex, and placed her free hand on Alex's waist and placed her hand holding the ice cream cup behind the blonde. Alex put her forearms on Olivia's shoulders, holding her cone. Alex peeked at the ring as she held it up behind Olivia's head.

"This ring, Liv…it's incredible. I can't stop looking at it, Baby."

"It's so you, Al. The moment I saw it…" The women leaned in to kiss, lightly, delicately before pulling away.

"That's what I felt about yours. It's guaranteed against damage, so it should withstand anything at work. Otherwise, they'll fix it, free."

"Always so practical, Babe." Olivia whispered before planting another kiss on her fiancé. "We'll have to have some conversations before we go back, though…"

"I know…" Alex admitted.

"Work, living arrangements…"

"Yep, we will…let's enjoy today, though, and not think about leaving just yet. We have a fabulous party to throw tonight!" Alex's excitement was contagious.

"Well, let's go shopping!"

The two women entered the store to purchase food and drink for the party that was sure to be a huge success, a good time had by all.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

The new walkway was lain, the house immaculately spotless, candles lit, food prepared and warming in the oven, meats marinating in the refrigerator. All they had to do was fire up the grill and have one of the men do one of the jobs they so loved to do—_grill_. It was 6:30 and Olivia had used the shower first and gotten ready before Alex this evening, but not before another quick session of celebratory satisfaction.

Olivia stood, looking at her reflection in the mirror. She had chosen a strapless, white, tan-belted maxi dress that hit at the ankle and she opted to wear her hair straight this eveing, parted to the side. She had applied dark eye make-up for the evening and wore a nude lipstick on her lips. All the work on her tan had paid off, she noticed, as she heard the shower shut off.

Olivia sat on the foot of the bed and began putting her strappy tan leather pumps on when Alex came out of the shower. Olivia smiled when she saw a flustered Alex.

"I can't seem to cool down," Alex declared, exasperated. She stood in front of the mirror and looked at Olivia behind her in her own reflection.

Olivia smirked as she put on the other shoe. "I told you we should wait to fool around. You're so high strung right now about the party, and then us getting "overheated" per _your_ libido, and then the hot shower…it's no wonder you are so flushed."

Alex began fanning herself with her hand. "Yeah, _my_ libido…I need air…" She proceeded to open the screen door on the balcony and then pull the cord of the ceiling fan above the bed, closing her eyes and standing, face towards the fan, her towel wrapped around her.

"Might be cooler without the towel," Olivia suggested.

Alex opened her eyes and smiled, "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

"Without a doubt, but, you'll also cool off faster." Olivia said as she clasped a simple gold bracelet to her wrist.

Alex sighed and took the towel from her body, dropping it to the floor and closing her eyes again, holding her arms out to her sides and trying to dry her overheated skin.

Olivia stood quietly. God, Alex was adorable. Her cheeks were a bright crimson, her upper chest just as red, beads of sweat dripping down the sides of her face.

Olivia walked up to Alex and slowly, quietly, began lightly blowing on the blonde, beginning at her shoulders, then her chest, down her arms, and belly, across her mound, her upper thighs.

"Olivia…" Alex tried. "Do you really think that's going to help?" Alex opened her eyes and look determinedly at the brunette. Alex gave her a look that said _Please don't do this to me right now_.

Olivia leaned forward and kissed Alex delicately on the lips, "OK, let me leave you alone…I'll be upstairs in case anyone arrives early." Olivia blew a kiss to her fiancé before exiting the room.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

By 7:30 all of the guests had arrived, beverages having been served by the honorary bartender, Olivia Benson, and the party was in full swing. Melinda and her husband, Thomas, stood in the kitchen talking to Alex as she adjusted the oven temperature, while Olivia chatted with Elliot, Fin, and Munch on the veranda, wines and beers in hand.

"Liv, it looks like suspension agrees with you," Elliot declared. "I see your hand has healed." He looked into her eyes, at her hair, her face. "I don't know what it is, Liv, but you look great."

"She always looks great, Elliot. You're just too tired from having twenty kids to notice," Munch intervened. "We have missed you at the precinct, though, Liv. It hasn't been the same without you. No one to put a gourmet twist on the squad room coffee."

"Thanks, Munch." Olivia smiled.

"Baby girl, you definitely look on fire tonight. How'd you get that bangin' tan, my sistah?" Fin questioned smiling and eyeing her arms and shoulders.

"The beach, Fin…lots of hanging out at the beach. That's what happens when you're on forced leave." Olivia took a sip of her wine. "But I am so grateful that Alex took me in and that we came here…I don't know what I'd do without her." Olivia looked toward the kitchen watching as Melinda was having a very animated conversation with Alex.

The blonde glanced at Olivia, smiling. Olivia returned the smile and wanted so desperately to blow a kiss to her fiancé, but refrained.

"Well, even if the reasons were not the best, you look well-rested and happy," Elliot tried, a twinkle in his eye.

"I'm sorry Cathy couldn't come," Olivia tried.

"Yeah, she was upset she couldn't come either but with Eli having a cold, it was better." Elliot jumped slightly and patted his pants pocket before pulling out his cell phone and pressing a button. "Probably Kathy. I'll be right back." He put it to his ear, "Stabler." He walked inside, heading towards the staircase for privacy.

"No, seriously, Liv. You look wonderful," Munch began.

Fin nodded in agreement.

"I appreciate it, John…I had a rough first couple of days after the initial situation and then finding out I was suspended, but Alex has been really good to me…patient, kind, understanding, _and_ an excellent cook."

"You couldn't tell, girl, looking at you, it looks like you've trimmed down, actually…toned up."

_If he only knew the fun I've had staying in shape_, Olivia thought. She simply smiled. "I guess relaxation and swimming will do that for you."

Olivia offered to refill the guys' drinks and headed for the wet bar, motioning to Alex with her head and the widening of her eyes.

While getting Munch another red wine and Fin another Heineken, Alex came up behind Olivia, grabbing her waist and looking around, obviously on the lookout for anyone coming. Once she saw it was clear, she kissed Olivia's neck.

"Everything OK?"

"Yeah, how are we going to do this? Are we going to announce this or let people figure it out or what?" Olivia asked as she poured Coke into the glass of ice and Jack Daniels.

"Let's just wait and see what happens," Alex spoke into Olivia's neck, her chin on her shoulder. "Kind of exciting."

Olivia turned, both drinks in hand, and kissed Alex quickly before turning to go back to the party. Alex slapped Olivia's backside and declared, "Be sure to tip your server…" She winked at the brunette.

Olivia smiled and re-entered the party.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex turned to go back into the kitchen but was stopped by a voice.

"Alex?"

Alex turned to the top of the stairs, Elliot on the first step, obviously coming up. "Hey, Elliot."

He moved up the last step and walked up to the attorney. "What's going on?" His face was confused, almost incredulous.

Alex's heart began pounding. "What do you mean?"

"What's going on with you and Liv?"

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

**A/N: Gotcha! Is Elliot angry or confused? When Liv got drunk earlier in the story and Elliot said, "She's always loved you…" to Alex, did he know what he was saying? Did Alex? How exactly did Elliot mean that statement? **

**How would you like Elliot to react? **

**Message or leave a review.**

**Thanks!**

**Patricia**


	23. Chapter 23

23

AAAAAAAA

Alex looked at Elliot, her eyes determined. "I think you should probably talk with Liv about that."

Elliot nodded, looking at the floor. He looked up, his face red, blue eyes blazing. "Why don't you just tell me, Cabot?"

"Because I don't want to violate Olivia's privacy before she and I speak."

Elliot laughed, "Violate her privacy?" He smiled, "Violate her privacy…that's rich…I've known her for nine years, I know almost everything there is to know about her, and you think I'm violating her privacy?" He turned around in a circle, running his fingers through his close-cropped hair. "Jeez…"

_Almost everything is right_, Alex thought. "What I _can_ tell you, Elliot, is that I care and love Olivia so deeply that no reaction from you, positive or negative, could change that…" Alex's voice was calm, even, low.

Elliot nodded, rubbing the stubble on his chin. He then looked at Alex once again. "Like you said, I should talk to her." He started to move past Alex, but she caught his bicep in a firm grip.

"Don't you _dare_ upset her, Stabler." Alex glared at Elliot as the two had an exchange of looks that said _I detest you right now_.

Alex let go of Elliot's arm and watched as he rounded the wet bar and entered the kitchen. Alex slowly followed, arms crossed, awaiting the fireworks.

Olivia didn't need this right now. Neither of them did. Elliot was overreacting, as usual. Elliot didn't like being out of the loop and he was so far out of the loop on this one, he was beside himself. Alex knew how protective he was of Olivia. Then why had he even mentioned the fact that Olivia had always loved her?

Alex watched as Elliot whispered into Olivia's ear on the veranda. Then, the two of them entered the kitchen, Elliot guiding Olivia, his hand on the small of her back. Olivia looked at Alex as she walked, her expression fretful. She looked like a child waiting for a fatherly reprimand as they entered the privacy of the butler's pantry.

Alex needed to be there for her. She followed them and stood in the doorway. "Liv?"

OOOOOOOO

The women looked at each other. Olivia had no idea why she was being asked into a private conversation by Elliot. _How could he know anything_?

When he whispered to her, he said he wanted to speak to her privately. Her heart was racing out of her chest, though, as Alex looked at her with empathetic eyes.

"OK," Elliot began, "…since you now have a bodyguard, I guess I'll just talk to both of you."

Olivia swallowed, looking at Elliot and then at Alex and then back at Elliot.

"What's going on, Liv? I saw Cabot kiss your neck and then she slapped your ass? I might have thought it was just you two playing around until your lips were on each other."

Olivia folded her arms, her expression turning confident. "What do you want to know, El? Ask away. I have absolutely nothing to hide."

"Well, for starters, the kiss and the ass slap?" He folded his arms across his sturdy chest.

"Yes, what about them? That's what people who are in love do…or have you been married so long you've forgotten about playful flirtation?"

Olivia saw Alex out of the corner of her eye, very obviously withholding a smile, as she brought her lips inward.

"In love? Did…am I…did I just hear that right?"

Olivia lifted her chin and moved backwards toward Alex. Alex placed her left hand on Olivia's back, rubbing it lightly.

Elliot noticed the movement and his face softened slightly. His voice was now softer. "Just tell me, Liv. What is going on?"

Olivia stepped closer to Elliot, placing her hand on his shoulder. "Alex and I…this isn't something new, Elliot. We…" She stopped, unsure of what to say.

"I know that you and Alex have always been very close friends…like sisters…"

Olivia shook her head, "No, El…not like sisters, well maybe _for a very brief period _like sisters..."

Elliot took a step away and leaned forward resting his elbows on the island in the pantry. His eyes glazed over. "Then, like what, Liv?" He suddenly sounded weary.

Olivia took a breath. "When she went into witness protection, we had been dating for almost a year. Before that, we had become very close…starting a relationship was just… _natural_. Then she left and…it ended." Olivia felt the tears in her eyes.

"Dating? How come I didn't know that?"

Olivia smiled, "Well, _Dad_…we kept it private for different reasons. One, we worked together. Two, we were just close, close friends for a long time, and three, you're such a steadfast Catholic, I thought…" Olivia's lower lip trembled. "I knew you wouldn't approve."

Alex gripped Olivia's right shoulder, squeezing it reassuringly.

Olivia continued, "And, as much as I try not to care, your opinion of me still matters a great deal." Alex slipped her arm around Olivia's waist.

"I just can't believe you never said anything…that I didn't know about you and Cabot…" He looked up now, noticing Alex's arm around Olivia possessively.

"It wasn't to hurt you, El…it was to keep my relationship with Alex sacred…I didn't want to hear, _from anyone_, that I shouldn't be with her." Olivia looked at Alex right next to her. She could feel Alex's hand squeezing her side consolingly. She put her own hand on Alex's. "My feelings for Alex have always been strong, stronger than anyone I've ever gotten close to."

"So…" Elliot began, "…you two are dating again, is that it?"

Olivia looked at Alex and Alex nodded slightly. She looked back at Elliot. "We're past dating, El. _Way_ past dating. When Alex and I reconnected two weeks ago, we both realized how much we had missed each other and how much we missed being together, how much we _needed_ to be together. But, this time, our feelings surpassed any prior intensity. Even with my suspension, everything about our relationship fell into place—our friendship, our companionship…we realized that this is real and it's what we both want, _have wanted_, since we first met."

Elliot stood now, placing his hands in his pockets. "I just can't believe I didn't know…I mean, I knew you were close, but…"

Olivia waited, now slipping her right arm around Alex's waist. The women looked at each other, smiling.

Elliot watched them, recognition passing over his face. He smiled at Olivia and then turned his attention to Alex, his face becoming serious. "This woman, right here…" he pointed to Olivia, "…means the world to me." His voice shook as he cleared his throat. "I've only ever wanted her to be happy." He cleared his throat again, taking a moment and looking at Olivia. He walked closer to Alex & Olivia, placing a hand on each woman's shoulder. "If you two are happy, I'm happy. But, if I even _hear_ anything about Liv being upset…I'm coming right to you, Cabot."

Alex smiled, "I'll be ready for you, Stabler—boxing gloves on."

Olivia smiled and leaned the side of her head against Alex's.

It felt so good to have it out to the man whose reaction Olivia feared the most.

Elliot stepped forward and took Olivia into a firm, secure hug, whispering against her ear, "I'm happy for you, Liv." He held her tightly for a few seconds.

"Thanks, El."

Pulling away, Elliot looked at Alex, smiling slightly, "Remember, counselor…" He took Alex into a hug, as well, "…take care of her, Alex…" Elliot's voice cracked.

"This isn't goodbye, El," Olivia teased.

Alex and Elliot pulled away, the two women returning their arms to holding each other's waists.

"Now, point me to that souped-up monster grill you've been bragging about."

AAAAAAAA

Alex started thinking, if Elliot had no idea, then maybe others didn't either.

As they sat around the large kitchen table, Alex at the head near the balcony door, Olivia at the opposite head, screen door open, candles flickering in the sea air, the Eagles playing on the Bose®, everyone was enjoying the feast.

"This coleslaw is the bomb," Fin began, "…did you make this, Liv?"

"Nope, I can't take credit. Alex did. The only thing I did was turn the oven on."

"You turned it off, too, Babe," Alex added, smiling, before taking a sip from her wineglass.

A silence filled the room at Alex's term of endearment.

She stopped mid-sip, realizing her slip. She had already had a few glasses of her favorite Chardonnay and was feeling very loose, as were all the guests at the dinner party from their own consumption of beverages.

Melinda was the first to speak, taking her own rosé wine into her hand, "Now, I might just have an incredible imagination and live for all things romantic, but what's going on with your fingers, ladies?" Melinda was obviously feeling no pain. She smirked, looking between the two other women.

Olivia smiled at Alex, unable to hide her giddiness. Now that Elliot knew, it seemed to be smooth sailing. "Al? You or me?"

"You, Babe."

Alex noted the flush in Olivia's cheeks from the current moment and from the few glasses of Cabernet she had already had. The brunette started to speak, her eyes beginning to tear and her voice quavering, "Alex and I are engaged."

Alex waited, still unsure of what the others would do. The table was silent for an uncomfortable few seconds—that seemed like minutes—everyone looking at each other, trying to understand the announcement.

"Here, here!" Munch proclaimed. "Congratulations, Matzel Toff!"

The rest of the table raised their glasses in a toast. Alex looked at Elliot, his face unemotional, his eyes penetrating Olivia's.

Fin said, quietly holding his glass up again, "Congratulations, baby girl." He turned to Olivia sitting to his left and leaned over and kissed her on the cheek.

"Thanks, Fin…" Olivia whispered.

"I have to say unexpected…but not surprising," Melinda began. "I could always see something between you two…" she smiled and sipped her wine, clasping her husband's hand on top of the table.

Alex watched as Olivia looked at Elliot, the brunette's face steely.

"What is it, Elliot?" Olivia began.

_Oh, Jesus. Here we go_, Alex thought.

"Liv…" Alex tried, her voice quiet.

Olivia looked at Alex, "No, no…I want to know what his look is for…"

Elliot sat silently, now smirking, shaking his head lightly. He stood from the table, went inside, and disappeared around the corner.

Olivia got up to follow him, but Fin put his hand on her arm, "Liv, just leave him. Let him cool off and get through whatever dumb ass shit he's feeling right now. You know him. Damn hothead."

Olivia hesitated then sat, putting her napkin back in her lap. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

Olivia looked at Alex with tears in her eyes. Alex mouthed the words _I love you_. Olivia's face contorted with emotion. Olivia mouthed _I love you, too_.

Melinda said, "We're all family here so I want to hear the details."

Munch, ever the gentleman, stood, "Excuse me for a couple of minutes. I'm going to see what's up with Mr. Neanderthal." He exited the veranda and walked into the house.

Alex saw worry in her fiancés eyes.

AAAAAAAA

After Olivia explained the details of their nine year long relationship, Alex stood from the table and began taking dishes into the kitchen as Melinda followed her with more plates. Olivia brought the potato platter and coleslaw bowl into the kitchen and set them on the large island. Thomas asked where the restroom was and headed in that direction.

Alex walked up to Olivia and placed her palms underneath her elbows.

God, she looked beautiful—beautiful but sad.

After all the happiness they had experienced lately, it was difficult to see her fiancé like this. Alex lifted Olivia's chin with her thumb, "Hey…don't do this to yourself. You know Elliot."

Olivia laughed lightly, her eyes tearing again. The brunette was so emotional this evening. All Alex wanted to do was take her into her arms and kiss her tears away. "You go sit with Melinda on the balcony and let me get this."

"I'll help," Fin chimed in as he smiled and went to get more dishes from the table. "Me and Alex got this, Liv. You go relax," he called from the table.

Alex leaned in and kissed Olivia on the forehead and then looked at her, smiling. The attorney tucked a piece of chestnut hair behind her ear and then softly planted a kiss on the brunette's lips, slowly, sweetly. "I love you, Liv."

"I love you, too, Al…" Olivia kissed her fiancé again and then smiled, taking her wineglass and heading towards the balcony, Melinda following, her arm around her friend.

OOOOOOOO

Olivia sat with Melinda on the balcony in two Adirondack chairs talking about Elliot's inability to cope with certain aspects of relationships—or rather, Melinda did. Olivia simply sat, wine in hand, nodding and agreeing with everything the M.E. said. She wasn't trying to be distant but Elliot had her rattled. That and the fact that the detective was feeling highly buzzed, and the kiss Alex gave her, and the way she mouthed that she loved her almost had her jumping the attorney's bones right then and there. She really needed to work off some stress and aggression. Alex would get it tonight.

"Earth to Liv…" Melinda laughed.

"Wh-What? I-I'm sorry…" Olivia stuttered.

"I asked when you're coming back to the city." Melinda shook her head laughing.

"Oh, we're planning on driving back on Monday morning. Alex has to go back to work on Wednesday. So it'll give us a couple of days to figure some things out."

"Liv?" a male voice questioned from behind her.

Munch was standing in the doorway, "Can I steal you for a minute?"

"Oh…" Olivia stood, wavering slightly. "Sure…I'll be right back Melinda."

"Take your time," the M.E. assured her.

As Olivia began to enter the house, Fin was exiting onto the veranda with his drink in hand, followed by Alex, with her wine. Olivia brushed by Alex, their breasts grazing each other's and Olivia felt a rush of warmth in her core, her nipples responding immediately from the light contact. The small gasp that she wasn't sure came from her own mouth must have, because when the detective turned back to look at Alex, the blonde was looking directly at her, smirking.

Olivia continued to follow Munch. He led her into the foyer at the top of the stairs.

Munch put his hands on Olivia's upper arms and looked her in the eyes. "Elliot had to go…"

Olivia opened her mouth to speak but Munch stopped her.

"Kathy called again and said that Eli had a 103.3 fever. He had to get back and they were going to take him to the emergency room."

Olivia's eyes glazed over as she nodded at the floor. "You know, this is Alex's house, he was a guest, he could have at least said goodnight."

"He did. He said goodnight to Alex and Fin and Thomas and I, but…he saw you and Melinda talking and didn't want to interrupt your conversation. He told me to tell you he'd call you soon."

Olivia shook her head. "Saved my the bell, huh?"

"Olivia, you know his son is really sick…" Munch tried.

Olivia felt badly, she closed her eyes, speaking quietly, "I know, John…" She opened them again, looking at the tall, thin man in front of her. "He just makes me so mad sometimes. He's always got to have a problem with something in my personal life."

"He was just surprised, Liv. When I talked to him he said he just doesn't understand why you were so secretive about your relationship. He talked about how he's always shared what was going on with him and Kathy and the kids and their lives…then, when you announced your engagement, he felt excluded again. You and he have worked together so long, are so close…an engagement is a big deal." He eyed her over his Transition® lenses, that were still dark even in the dim lighting of the house.

Olivia fought a smile on her face, "Yeah, it _is_ a big deal…" she admitted.

"Let me see that ring…" He took her hand into his, admiring the jewelry. "Very classy…just like you." He kissed the top of her head and then enveloped her in his long arms as she rested her head against his chest.

"Thanks, John."

Fin entered the foyer. "I don't want to break up Lovefest 2009, but Alex said we were going to go down and make a campfire on the beach. She said she has a surprise for Liv."

"Come on," Munch began, his arm around Olivia. "Let's get the bottles and relax. No more tension or stress, OK?"

Olivia nodded, her lips inward, as she walked with Munch.

AAAAAAAA

The sound of the waves crashing on the shore just feet away, the warm, buzzed bodies enjoying the crisp night air, and the feeling of heat coming from Olivia's body was the perfect combination to have Alex feeling incredibly blessed. Fin and Thomas had just lit the campfire and it added light and warmth on this cool spring evening. All were sitting around the low fire, able to see one another. Melinda and Thomas sat on an Adirondack for two, Munch and Fin each on their own, and Alex and Olivia shared another Adirondack loveseat.

Olivia pressed herself closer to Alex as the blonde leaned back from securing the heavy blanket around them. Olivia took a sip from her glass. "So, what's the surprise?"

"You weren't supposed to tell her, Fin…" Alex kidded.

Alex leaned to her left to retrieve something from the sand. From a canvas bag, she pulled out a package of Hershey bars, a bag of jumbo marshmallows, wooden skewers, and a box of graham crackers. "We are going to make s'mores!"

Olivia's face lit up. She grabbed Alex's face and kissed her hard, her tongue almost making an entrance before remembering they weren't alone.

Olivia pulled away, smiling. "Thanks, Babe."

"Man, if I didn't see it before, I see it now," Melinda began. "You two are definitely in love." She held her glass in the air. "To Alex and Liv!"

All followed with their own wineglasses, Munch and Thomas having switched to cappuccinos Alex made with her espresso machine.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

The rest of the evening was spent sitting around the campfire, talking until many s'mores had been eaten. After a while, the group's conversation had quieted, all feeling the effects of from fatigue and alcohol as the fire faintly glowed with small embers. Deciding it was time to head in for the evening, the men poured sand and water on the fire and the group slowly made their way back to the house.

AAAAAAAA

After Alex made sure all appliances were shut off, guests had fresh towels and knew where everything was, and the kitchen was cleaned, she walked hand-in-hand with Olivia to their bedroom and closed the door. Alex pinned Olivia against the door, putting her arms above her head. "Uhhhh," Olivia tried as Alex began sucking on her neck.

"We have to be quiet…" Alex warned in a hushed voice. "But I couldn't wait to have you." Knowing it was the right thing to do, Alex questioned, continuing to kiss her neck, "Do you want to talk about what happened with Elliot?"

Olivia pushed her breasts forward, allowing the blonde better access to her heaving chest, "We can talk later."

Alex pressed her open mouth on Olivia's skin, sucking, probing, moving lower. Alex unbuckled Olivia's belt and then threw it on the floor, then began working on pulling the top of her dress down, revealing a strapless bra. She reached around and unclasped it, letting in fall to the floor as she took the brunette's mouth in a heated kiss, her hands gravitating to the soft, warm, bulbous globes in front of her.

"_Alex_," Olivia whispered, eyes closed.

"Do you know…that every time I wiped melted marshmallow from your mouth tonight…Jesus…" she pulled Olivia's dress down to the floor as the detective stepped out of it, "…I wanted to suck it off of your mouth."

Alex reached into Olivia's heated panties, feeling her soaked. "Oh, Liv, Baby…" Alex knelt down and pulled Liv's panties down, Olivia's eyes following her with heavy lids, breasts heaving. Alex moved in and kissed the top of Olivia's entrance, noting how it glistened and taking the time to gently suck her lips and use the tip of her tongue to play with her slit. Olivia was trembling with need.

"Let's go to the bed," she tried. "With the wine and how turned on I am…I don't think I'll make it standing."

Alex smiled and took Olivia's hand leading her to the bed. Alex took her glasses off and placed them on the nightstand as the detective threw the covers over and moved her naked body to the middle, spreading her legs and arms, still panting. Alex climbed onto the bed, positioning herself in between Olivia's trembling knees.

Alex moved her body down and spread Olivia's thighs even wider, caressing the smooth skin of her thighs and knees. She kissed and licked her left thigh and then her right thigh and then looked up at Olivia. The brunette's head was on the pillows, eyes closed, breathing erratically. The brunette began playing with her own pebbled nipple as she squeezed her other breast.

Whispering, she said, "Alex please…"

Grinning, Alex asked, "You're sure you don't need to talk?"

Olivia's eyes shot open and she lifted her head slightly, her breathing still labored. What I _need_ is for you to get me off…" she demanded, smiling.

Alex brought her face down, once again, to Olivia's folds. She placed two fingers inside her lover and began a sucking motion on her bundle of nerves, flicking and licking, sucking and releasing. Olivia cried out as Alex added two more fingers.

"Liv!" she warned in a loud whisper.

"This was your idea," she moaned, Alex continuing. "I was just gonna brush my...ahhh…teeth…and wash…oooohhh…my face…and—and—and—Fuuuu—!" Olivia crashed down around Alex's fingers, shuddering so hard that Alex had to hold on to the brunette's hips to keep the headboard from banging against the wall.

Alex lapped up Olivia's juices after she finished coming down. She slid up to the brunette and lay beside her, resting her head against hers on the pillow.

Olivia opened her eyes, turned to Alex and patted her thigh, "Come here."

Alex climbed on top of Olivia, straddling her, her core on Olivia's toned belly. Olivia reached between Alex's legs and placed her firm hand there. As Alex began to rock back and froth, Olivia lifted a couple of fingers for Alex's stimulation and pleasure.

"Oh, Baby. Liv that feels so good," she whispered, her rocking intensifying. Alex began rocking so hard that she began riding Olivia's fingers while the detective's palm hit her clit. Alex thrust against the brunette's hand repeatedly, each time harder and harder. "Uhhh, Liv…lick my nipple…"

Olivia sat up, hand still firmly in place and began pleasuring Alex's right, pebbled nipple. Alex gasped then moaned, her pumping getting faster. She was trying so hard to be quiet, knowing that guests were on all sides of their room. Letting out a whimpered moan, she began a slow, sensual rocking, her eyes now captured with Olivia's. She leaned forward over the detective, still gyrating, and kissed Olivia savagely. She bit the detective's lower lip, taking it in her mouth and sucking, and held on to Olivia's shoulders as her release began rolling through her core, causing her body to buck uncontrollably. After a few moments, slowly, slowly her movements stopped and she opened her eyes. She leaned over and planted another long, sensual kiss on her fiancé. She moved to the side of Olivia, left arm and leg draped over her and kissed her mocha nipple delicately.

"I love you…" Olivia whispered, her energy failing.

"I love you, too, Baby…" Alex said smiling.

As Olivia's breathing became deep and even, Alex knew she had fallen asleep or was in the beginning stages of sleep. Alex reached over to her alarm clock and set it for 7:00 to wake up before the guests and, without another word, both women drifted off to sleep in each other's arms.


	24. Chapter 24

24

The classic rock sounds of an AC/DC guitar riff blasted to the left of the attorney just before she slammed her hand down on the silver box to mute the alarm.

She moaned, feeling a weight on top of her. Peeling her eyes open and looking down, she smiled, closing her eyes again. Olivia had managed to wrap herself around Alex, right thigh hiked all the way over Alex's stomach, right hand gripping the attorney's waist.

Olivia took a deep breath, lightly squeaking as she stretched in the attorney's arms. Alex looked to the left at the alarm that she had just snoozed. _7:01 a.m._ She wanted to have everything ready for the guests upstairs before they awoke. First, the task was to peel Olivia away without waking her. Alex lightly clasped the detective's wrist, trying to lift it but was met with a firm grip.

"No…" Olivia muttered, smiling.

Alex grinned, "You're awake…"

"When you're woken up by that electric guitar racket in the morning, how can I not be?"

"That's why I have that station programmed on there…get the adrenaline flowing…"

"Hmmm, I can think of other ways…" Olivia lifted her head and leaned slightly upward as Alex met her plush lips in a slow, delicate kiss.

"You know we have some early risers staying here…I gotta get up and get everything ready…" Alex tried, Olivia sliding further upward and beginning to kiss her neck, her hands roaming over the attorney's breasts.

"Liv…"

Olivia stopped and looked at Alex, smiling. "OK…later…"

"Naturally," Alex said, sliding out of bed and beginning to put on a pair of sweatpants and a NY Mets t-shirt.

Alex smiled as she eyed Olivia slowly easing her naked form from the bed. The detective casually strolled to the dresser, completely uninhibited, and pulled out a pair of faded, dark blue pair of jeans, a charcoal baby tee, and her bra. Alex silently appreciated the level of comfort both women had achieved in their relationship.

Alex smirked as she put her socks on while standing up. "Why the bra, Liv? Going somewhere?"

"Hmmm?" Olivia questioned, as she clasped the back of the garment. "Babe…you know I can't go braless in front of our friends and colleagues. With you in the room, it'll be bordering obscene." She smiled. "My girls need wrangling…" she smiled.

Alex laughed. "Giddy up…" Alex leaned into Olivia and kissed her before turning and leaving the room, Olivia putting her black flip-flops on and then following close behind to help start the day.

OOOOOOOO

By the time Alex and Olivia had finished cutting cantaloupe and mango, brewing coffee, mixing and pouring the breakfast quiches, and setting the table, Olivia had gone back downstairs to take a quick shower and dressed in a pair of faded, hole-ridden Capri jeans and a button-down white linen shirt, her hair in a ponytail, and walked back upstairs into the kitchen.

Alex had her back turned to the detective, unaware of her presence, as the Bose® played soft, light classical music. Olivia crept up behind Alex as the blonde held up the New York Times, obviously quite intent. Olivia slid her arms around Alex's stomach and the attorney jumped slightly.

Olivia buried her face in the crook of the blonde's neck. "What else can I do to help?" she mumbled against Alex's neck.

"Coffee's ready so you can get yourself a cup and just relax. We're just waiting for everyone to wake." The blonde put her newspaper down and turned, putting her arms around Olivia, smiling sweetly. Planting a kiss on the brunette, she slid her hands down and gripped her backside. "You smell great." She kissed Olivia's neck and Olivia could hear her slowly inhaling her scent against her ear. "I'm gonna go and take a quick shower, too. If anyone comes up, let them help themselves to the coffee. The breakfast quiches need about fifteen more minutes in the oven. Timer's on…take them out then…"

"Got it…" Olivia looked deep into those blue pools in front of her. "Coffee, timer, quiches, oven…"

Alex kissed Olivia once again and smirked, getting a good slap to her backside in before heading downstairs. Walking towards the stairs, Alex turned, "Oh and, since it's one of your specialties…" she smirked, "…you can turn the oven off when it's done"

AAAAAAAA

After having eaten breakfast and talking over coffee, Melinda, Thomas, and Fin took a dip in the ocean before their departure. While the guests were by the sea, enjoying the beautiful, sunny day it was becoming, Olivia and Alex had a chance to clean up the kitchen and begin a couple of loads of sheets, dishtowels, and bath towels.

Once the guests left around noon, Alex and Olivia took the time to relax. Olivia sat on the window seat in the study, gazing out across the sea, a cup of tea in hand.

Alex came in and said softly, "Hey…"

Olivia turned, smiling, but those cocoa eyes looked slightly distraught.

Alex moved towards her and sat next to her gently on the blue cushion of the window seat. "What is it, Liv?"

"I was just thinking…about going back…" Her eyes began to tear.

Alex waited patiently for Olivia to speak her mind.

"When we get back, I'll have about ten days until I'll be _allowed _to go back."

Alex nodded.

"You'll go back to work and I'll…just be at the apartment…wondering what you're doing…" she smirked, "…how you look...what position your legs are in…" Olivia reached for Alex's thigh, squeezing and caressing it gently, her face turning serious, tears pooling her eyes, once again.

"Baby, what is it?"

After a few moments, a tear rolled down Olivia's cheek and she looked up at Alex with one of the most hopeless expressions the attorney had ever seen on the brunette. "I don't know if I want to go back, Al…to work, I mean."

Alex placed a hand on Olivia's knee. "These are the things we need to talk about Liv."

Olivia nodded, looking down at her mug. "I know. It's hard…I can't believe…I'm actually thinking about putting my papers in, Al…" Her face contorted in anguish as she leaned forward and sobbed into Alex's chest. Alex quickly set her mug down next to her and wrapped Olivia in her arms, rocking her slowly, gently, rubbing her back.

"Shhhhh…everything will be OK, whatever you decide, Baby…if you decide to resign, we'll be fine, and if you don't resign…"

Alex stopped herself wondering how Olivia _would_ be if she _didn't_ resign. It worried Alex, thinking of Olivia going back to work with the cases that had broken her down—getting caught up in the vicious cycle of stealing her soul, bit by bit. Olivia's heart was big but, when a sliver was taken away with each victim, each case, Alex wasn't sure she'd last emotionally.

Alex pulled away, cupping Olivia's neck, "You don't have to decide right now. You've been a cop for so long, it's what you know. Just quitting would be difficult for you."

Olivia nodded.

Alex caressed Olivia's cheek and smiled slightly, trying to get the brunette to think positively. "Those ten days that I'm at work…will be the perfect time for you to do some soul searching, figure out what else you might be interested in, what else you're passionate about…_while_ you're fantasizing about me, of course." She smirked and Olivia couldn't help a little smile.

"Then…" she took Olivia's hands into hers, holding them to her chest, "…you can go back and see how you feel. If you realize that it's not how you want to spend the rest of your working life, you will, perhaps, have thought of another option in those ten days before."

Olivia reached up to Alex's cheek, "You're so smart, Al…" She began crying again. "I don't know how I deserve you…"

The two women embraced. "I'm the lucky one, Liv…"

Olivia mumbled, her chin on Alex's shoulder, "I wish we could stay here forever."

"Well, if it's any consolation, just know…we'll definitely be spending our retirement here, with our kids, our family, our friends…"

The women parted and Olivia said, "I can't wait…sounds wonderful." Olivia closed her eyes and Alex took the opportunity to kiss her softly. She could feel Olivia's lips trembling beneath her and knew that she was crying. "Make love to me, Alex…"

The kiss was slow yet intense as clothing was discarded piece by piece. They made love right there, on the carpeted floor of the study, comforting, reassuring, and expressing their eternal commitment to each other.

OOOOOOOO

Alex and Olivia spent the rest of that Saturday afternoon getting the house ready for their departure on Monday. Although the cleaning team that the family had on payroll to clean every two weeks would come again, right before Alex's parents got back, Alex's type A personality still wanted to make sure that everything that they had disturbed during their stay was put back in place and that all of the guest rooms were pristine.

"Olivia…surely you've made a bed before."

Olivia folded her arms, smirking. "Not under Nazi rule. Why don't you tell me what I'm doing wrong, Al? This bed is the size of my apartment growing up and, remember, I didn't have a military father who liked to bounce quarters off of the beds."

"Neither did I, but…" she re-tucked the corner Olivia had just completed.

Olivia began, "Did you ever watch Saturday Night Live when Phil Hartman was on?" The brunette leaned against the frame of the window as Alex continued to perfect the corners.

Recognition passed over Alex's face and she stopped, smiling and shaking her head, but kept her focus on the corner she was fixing. "Liv, if you're telling me that I'm like the anal retentive chef, you'll be _very _sorry."

"Oh?" Olivia tried. "I'll be very sorry, huh? How so?"

"Well, you don't need to worry about it, if you don't say it."

"Say what? That you remind me of the anal retentive chef?" Olivia pushed, earning a glare from Alex. "You have to admit, Al, everything has to be just so…Everything is put in a brown paper bag, folded over three times and stapled twice." Olivia's nostrils flared and she brought her lips inward, refraining from smiling.

"You're gonna get it, you know…"

"Good, because I _want_ it…" Olivia countered. "I think that's one of the _many_ things that drew me to you...your perfection…you wearing those perfectly skin tight pencil skirts, tailored shirts crisp and flawless, immaculate hair, your eloquent execution of the English language, everything just so…a tease—a tease in one perfect package."

"_Me_ the tease? Surely you're joking."

Olivia looked at Alex as if to say, _Please_, _tell me more_.

"_You_ were the slow sensual tease for all those years. Those tight sweaters and shirts, those form hugging jeans and pants. No amount of "fitting in with the guys" or big black belts and guns could ever have worked with that body. You tried and you failed miserably, Babe."

"My duty belt? Feminine?"

"On those hips and above that ass, absolutely."

"Hmmmm," Olivia walked closer to Alex, having finished the bed. "_This_ ass?" She wrapped her arms securely around the attorney, pressing her pelvis tightly against her.

Alex nodded, feeling a sudden throbbing in her core. "Yes…" she rasped.

"So…am I gonna '_get it'_ now or later?"

"Maybe you 'getting it' is you _not_ getting it…"

Olivia narrowed her eyes, thinking. "Oh, I hardly think you would be able to manage that, Al."

If anything, Alex loved to be challenged. A friendly game of _I can outdo you_ might be fun. Olivia had just made it official by saying the attorney wouldn't be able to do it. "What are you suggesting, detective? That I wouldn't be able to control myself? That I might cave and lose control?"

Olivia nodded slowly, smiling.

"If this is a game that you want to play, remember, it goes both ways. You would be suffering, too. I have to tell you and, if you know anything about me—which you do—once challenged, nothing gets in my way."

Olivia kissed Alex's neck slowly, letting her tongue linger. Alex tilted her head to the side, closing her eyes. Olivia stopped suddenly, holding up her wrist behind Alex's head and looking at her watch. "Well, it's 3:30 right now…my bet is, you won't last until tomorrow morning." Olivia slid her hands down to Alex's waist.

"I think you have that wrong, Liv. I will manage just fine. _You're_ the sex fiend."

Olivia raised her eyebrows, smirking. "We'll see…" Olivia quickly kissed Alex, yet slowly enough to leave the attorney wanting more, already. Alex's eyes remained closed as Olivia pulled away.

Alex opened her eyes and then Olivia claimed, "Then I guess time starts now until 8:00 tomorrow morning."

Alex was already regretting her decision…

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

**A/N: What has Alex done? Will she last the evening? Pizza, movies, talking and bubble baths coming…**

They had to pick up Katie from the airport on the following day and Olivia wanted to catch some more sun and swimming before their break came to a close.


	25. Chapter 25

25

AAAAAAAA

Around six-thirty that evening, after Alex's lengthy list had been completed, laundry finished, the majority of their clothing packed—save for the essentials—Alex depressed the _off_ button of her cell phone and placed it on the kitchen counter.

"OK…pizzas are ordered, two movies are ready to watch, the beers are chilling in the fridge," Alex explained as Olivia entered the kitchen from taking a load of folded laundry downstairs. "Now, we can just relax."

Alex wanted to go up to Olivia so badly and just kiss her senseless. She looked adorably worn out, ponytail disheveled, shirt askew. But that was exactly what the detective wanted—for Alex to give in. Truthfully, the attorney didn't know if _she_ could handle the closeness when all she wanted to do was hold, and kiss, and caress, and fondle Olivia every time she laid eyes on her.

But she had to tempt her, right? If she wanted to have Olivia any time between now and eight the next morning, she would have to break the brunette down before the detective broke her.

They had managed to keep their hands, and even their lips, off of each other while taking care of the straightening and cleaning of the entire house. Alex was beginning to wonder how her obscenely amorous fiancé was doing it.

God, Liv was good. Alex was impressed.

Even now, when Olivia walked into the kitchen, there was an irritating, nonchalant expression on her face.

"What kind of pizza?" the detective asked, putting the cleaning supply bucket in the small pantry.

"One supreme pan pizza and one Canadian bacon and jalapeno, thin crust…per your choice." Alex made a face.

"Really, Al? You love jalapenos…and you have Canadian bacon with your breakfast all the time."

"Yeah, but those two things are to be eaten in different settings, not on a crust, covered in cheese."

Alex smiled coquettishly at Olivia betting her eyelashes. Olivia looked questionably at Alex.

"I'll try it. Have the Pepcid ready," the attorney smiled as she reached into the refrigerator and pulled out two bottles of Dos Equis beers. She walked to a kitchen drawer and pulled out a bottle opener, flipping it open with ease. She was about to open the other when Olivia walked up and took the bottle, their hands brushing. Alex felt a jolt of electricity that flew right to her core.

_What is wrong with me? Control, Cabot!_

"Allow me…" Olivia, using her thumb alone, popped the cap off effortlessly.

Alex stood slack-jawed. She didn't know whether to be turned on or jealous.

"That's an Elliot trick. He taught me one night we stayed a little too long at O'Malley's." She took the other cap Alex had removed and her own and tossed them into the trash compactor.

"That's…" Alex cleared the lust from her throat, "…that's handy…"

Olivia laughed, "Jeez, Alex. I can see the blush in your cheeks and the…" Olivia stopped herself and took a sip of beer, her eyes not leaving Alex.

"The _what_, detective?" Alex's voice was a smooth as silk.

_What was Olivia going to say?_ Alex wondered.

"Babe, let's both relax…I feel like we're making this no fooling around thing much harder for each of us. Let's go to the veranda and wait for the pizzas…OK?"

They took their beers outside, leaving the screen door open to listen for the delivery.

OOOOOOOO

It was slightly chilly that evening so Alex had gotten her cardigan and Olivia's grey, NYPD hoodie from downstairs before returning to the veranda.

Alex shivered. Olivia looked over to the blonde sitting next to her. She wanted so badly to wrap her arms around her and warm her up. This _not touching thing_ was driving Olivia insane. It's not that they _couldn't_ touch or _weren't allowed_ to touch, it's just that, if Olivia were to touch Alex or kiss the attorney, it would be over. Just smelling Alex's scent as the ocean air blew in her direction was making Olivia wet—that delicate scent of her soft perfume and her shampoo and that subtle allure that was uniquely her fiancé.

Olivia closed her eyes as another breeze of Alex wafted her way.

"We can do _this_, can't we, Liv?" Alex reached over to Olivia's hand and interlaced her fingers.

Olivia gazed at the rock on Alex's hand. It was absolutely stunning and looked so delicate on the attorney's ivory finger. Olivia brought the blonde's hand to her mouth, closing her eyes, and kissing her smooth, flawless skin gently, smelling Alex. It was like a heroin injection to Olivia—not that she had ever done heroin—but she had seen people right after injecting it, and she imagined this total, complete relaxation and warmth was very similar to the addictive drug.

Olivia smiled, "Yes, Al…we can do this…" Olivia let their joined hands hang in between their chairs. Olivia waited a moment before asking, "So…what's gonna happen when we go back? I mean…we have two residences but I don't want to stay anywhere that doesn't have you there…" Olivia turned and looked intently at the blonde.

"I have actually been thinking about that, Babe. We could take turns staying at each other's place until we decide if we want to live in one of our places or get a whole new apartment, loft, or townhouse somewhere."

"Any place would be home as long as you're there, Alex," Olivia said in all seriousness. She looked at the attorney, a rush of pleasure passing through her. God, she wanted her…

Olivia looked back at the darkening sky and across the water, willing her lower half to regain control. She suddenly felt constricted in her clothing as her body responded to her heart and she found her chill was vanishing and her entire being heating up. She could feel her nipples straining through three layers of fabric, eager to be released and fondled and stroked and kissed by the attorney's plush, pink mouth. Her core and lower lips were pulsating with each rapid heartbeat. She took a deep breath and then a sip of her beer just as the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it," Alex offered, standing up.

Olivia watched the blonde pass by and ogled her heart-shaped backside, resisting the urge to reach out and touch it, as another round of pulsations began in her groin.

Olivia closed her eyes and leaned her head back against her chair, taking a deep breath. Olivia thought she'd be able to handle something as simple as this, especially being a grown woman. But, she felt like a teenager again and she was, literally, going crazy with desire. She and Alex had just made love the previous evening but she was so turned on right now…she couldn't take not being close to Alex. Her resolve was wearing very thin…

Olivia got up and went inside, placing both beers on the counter. She retrieved two dishes from the cabinet, forks and knives, and napkins and walked to the table to set it just as Alex walked in with the pizzas.

"Let's eat in front of the TV, Babe. You take the pizzas and plates downstairs. I'll get a couple more beers."

Olivia nodded, afraid of her voice at that moment, and smiled her agreement.

Once they had gotten downstairs, settled on the sofa, Avatar DVD in the player—one of Alex's choices because of all of the awards it was nominated for—Olivia had finally calmed down enough to ask Alex something she had been wondering about in regards to their challenge. "Hey, Al…"

Both women helped themselves to one piece of each kind of pizza.

Alex lowered the volume of the DVD that had just begun to play. "Yeah, Babe…" She took a bite of the supreme.

"What exactly are we talking about here? Are we talking _cave_ as in someone screaming 'mercy' and requesting a good screwing, or just _any_ touching, kissing, or sex at all?"

"Mmmmm…Alex swallowed. "I think penetration—getting so aroused to the point that you want the other to jackhammer you and then letting them."

Olivia smiled at Alex's choice in words.

"What? It just about says it all, right?"

"I suppose it does…" Olivia took a bite of pizza.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

They got about forty-five minutes into the movie until Olivia found herself laying down the length of the sofa on her back, with Alex lying against her, in between the detective's legs, while Olivia's head was propped by pillows. As Alex's head rested on her chest, the brunette absentmindedly stroked the blonde's hair.

"This is like a cartoon," Olivia stated monotone, her eyes glazing over from boredom.

"It has been nominated for so many awards, Liv. Give it a chance. I wanted to see what all of the buzz was about. It's supposed to be a cinematic achievement." Alex sat up to get her beer and then lowered her upper half back onto Olivia.

"It's like sexy smurfs."

Alex's hand picked up the remote and pointed it toward the TV repeatedly pressing the button to lower the volume. "Olivia Benson, I would not think that, in all your worldliness, intelligence, and acceptance that you would shun a movie because the characters in it are blue."

"I'm not shunning it…I'm just saying the aliens have great bodies. That one looks like you, Al."

Olivia could feel Alex's body begin to shake with laugher. Olivia peered around slightly to catch the attorney's face. Her eyes were closed, she had taken her glasses off and there was a huge smile on her laughing mouth.

"Babe?" Olivia smiled. Olivia began to knead Alex's shoulders as she laughed. Olivia wanted to seduce the blonde, now, more than ever. Her laughter was a tease. She loved the times Alex lost control and really laughed at something. Olivia was proud to do that.

Alex's voice sang a decrescendo, "Ahhhh," and then put her glasses back on, obviously finished with her fit of laughter.

"Better?" Olivia asked, still rubbing her shoulders.

"Yeah," Alex sank into the touch, her shoulders melting beneath Olivia's hands, her body leaning forward to allow Olivia better access to more of her back. Chin to her chest, Alex asked, "So…is this part of your great plan, detective?"

Olivia smiled as she continued to rub and as the movie continued to play at a very low volume. "What's that, counselor?"

"This…hitting my funny bone, then having me melt beneath your touch, then…"

"Then, what, Babe? I am not doing anything a normal, engaged couple wouldn't do. You just tell me to stop and I will."

Olivia's hands moved further down to the back of her ribcage, her thumbs massaging either side of her spine.

"Oh, Liv…" Alex breathed, her moan causing a tingling in Olivia's core as the blonde's ass pressed against her.

Olivia could feel her blood shift south from just that one utterance. The brunette closed her eyes and leaned forward, pressing her nose to Alex's silky tresses, inhaling. Olivia moved Alex's hair around to the front of her shoulder and fought the desire to place her lips on the woman's pulse point, which had sped up significantly in the past few seconds. Olivia watched as it jumped minutely.

Olivia moved her hands further down on Alex's back, her thumbs circling either side of her spine, while the other fingers clenched the attorney's trim waist.

Olivia felt Alex's hands on her ankles, beginning to clench them as Olivia's massaging became more intense. Alex's hands traveled upward, still, moving to Olivia's shins.

"I'm thinking oils right now…" Olivia tried, her eyes closed, her face buried in Alex's locks once again.

Olivia waited for the blonde to say something. "OK…" was all she uttered. Olivia gave the blonde a tiny push to get up. As she did, Olivia's hand slowly trailed down her back, her focus, once again, on the attorney's backside, as her fingers lingered there before Alex turned to face Olivia.

Alex must have caught the motion because she grinned before she held her hand out.

Olivia looked up at her, knowing her eyes were full of desire. She was not going to cave, though. This was going to be for Alex. The brunette was going to make her beg for mercy before the night was through. Olivia smiled and let the blonde pull her to a standing position.

AAAAAAAA

As Alex pulled Olivia up, their faces were within centimeters of each other. Olivia leaned in and softly pressed her lips to Alex, her tongue lightly lingering as the attorney parted them for her. Alex's hands went up to Olivia's face, holding the brunette's jaw in her hands. Alex wouldn't back down—_she hoped_—her plan was to make Olivia think that she was going to, and then Olivia would beg to be touched. Alex was going to put on a show and tantalize the detective until she had to have a release. If she knew Olivia, it wouldn't take much.

They entered the bedroom and Alex began a slow strip, removing her t-shirt over her head, her eyes not leaving the detective. She pulled her sweatpants off of her hips, revealing a matching, navy lingerie set. After taking her glasses off and putting them on the bedside table, she asked, "Where do you want me?"

_That's a loaded question_, Olivia thought. "Just lay on your stomach in the middle, your head at the foot."

Alex obliged and Olivia went into the side pocket of her already packed suitcase and retrieved a small bottle from it. Olivia placed the small bottle on the nightstand. Alex lifted her head to watch the detective, who followed suit in a slow strip. She began unbuttoning the linen shirt slowly, starting at the top.

Alex swallowed and lightly cleared her throat.

Olivia removed the shirt, shoulder by shoulder and then let it fall to the floor, her white, lacy bra simple yet incredibly sexy on the buxom brunette. She unbuttoned her jeans and unzipped them, and slowly began sliding them down her strong, tanned thighs, her toned abs visibly working. She stepped out of them, now only left in her bra and matching panties.

Alex felt a surge of wetness. She fought a groan as she felt herself become aroused just from viewing Olivia's physique.

Turning her head and facing away from Olivia, she could feel the brunette climb onto the bed and next thing the blonde knew there were two toned thighs against her sides, a weight from the detective's body on Alex's backside.

Alex closed her eyes, fighting the desire to flip over and let Olivia ravage her.

The squeezing of the oil was heard and then Olivia rubbing her palms together. Warm, slick hands touched her shoulders, once again, this time the lubrication felt even more delightful on Alex's skin. The scent of jasmine began to fill the space around them and Alex found herself smiling.

"That smells nice," the blonde mumbled.

Alex felt Olivia shift on top of her, moving her body down further to access Alex's entire back. Alex could hear Olivia's breathing, slow and steady.

"Any areas you want me to work on?" Olivia questioned, still rubbing.

_My crotch_, Alex thought.

Instead, the blonde simply shook her head and mumbled, "Wherever you want…"

The detective's hands traveled to the muscles along the attorney's spine, again, this time Alex felt firm knuckles digging into the muscle. This time, the blonde couldn't fight a moan as it hurt so good.

"Is that OK?" Olivia questioned.

"Yeah…" Alex tried, her face contorting in pleasurable pain.

Olivia continued her motions.

Alex couldn't fight the sounds coming from her own mouth. Olivia's hands were magical—strong, yet gentle. Alex heard the oil being squeezed once again and then Olivia's hands rubbing together, then warmth again.

Olivia shifted once more on top of her as Alex felt Olivia's heated core, once again, on the attorney's backside.

Then Alex heard it—a small grunt from the brunette. Alex felt a hot mouth gently hit the top of the blonde's back, sliding down as lips and tongue softly worked, kissing sucking, tonguing.

"I love you, Baby…" Olivia continued kissing Alex's back as her body began rocking slightly.

"I love you, too, Liv…"

Alex could feel the heat from Olivia's core as the detective sat up straight, once again, and continued her massaging. But Alex could feel the definite beginnings of a rhythmic movement from the brunette. Alex questioned, "What are you doing, Liv?"

OOOOOOOO

Olivia could feel her breathing becoming erratic as her lower lips twinged and pulsated with desire.

"No, no, no…" Alex tried to move so that she could turn over. Olivia stopped briefly and lifted a thigh to allow Alex to do so. Alex, now on her back, looked up at Olivia straddling her. "If you come…you lose."

"You never stated that in the rules," Olivia offered, smirking.

"Well, the whole idea is to 'satisfy' someone and make them come. Even if you come on your own, you lose." Alex reasoned. "What's the point if satisfaction is not achieved?"

"So…whoever comes first, then, is the loser…no matter how they got there."

Alex nodded, feeling Olivia's wet core now on her lower belly. Now, I'm not sure why I stopped you. I was about to win…"

Olivia's dark eyes showed pure lust as she leaned forward and kissed the attorney. Her breasts brushed against Alex's nipples and Alex couldn't help a gasp. "Do you want to come, Alex?"

Alex shook her head, Olivia seeing definite doubt there. "I want to win this."

Olivia shook her head, smiling. "But, what's the reward? Bragging rights?" Olivia questioned, as she circled the attorney's nipple with her index finger through her bra.

Olivia witnessed the attorney's dark pupils dilate even further. "_My_ reward? A romantic horse ride with yours truly. I have always wanted to see you on a horse, thighs clenching a powerful animal, you bobbing up and down..."

"Al, you know my fear…"

Olivia had had a fear of horses ever since a childhood friend of hers died from a kick by a horse.

"Babe, I know…but won't you do it for _me_? A vacation in a cabin in the mountains of Montana? You and me and two hours on a romantic horse trail?"

"Only for you…" Olivia put her hands on Alex's waist, squeezing firmly, then began caressing her toned belly with the backs of her hands, eliciting a moan from the blonde. "A rock concert, artist to be determined."

Alex opened her mouth to speak but Olivia stopped her. "Now I know you have an irrational fear of cats, but we can get a kitten and train her and she'll be the sweetest thing ever. I've never had a pet before."

Olivia leaned over Alex again, beginning to kiss her neck. "What do you say?"

"I say…" Alex tried but Olivia placed her mouth over the blonde's, her tongue searching the attorney's warm softness before pulling away, eyes closed. "…you have a deal."

Alex reached up for Olivia's bra clasp behind her. Olivia didn't stop her. She only continued to straddle Alex as Alex cupped the detective's breasts, sitting up to take a pebbled nipple into her mouth and tease her with a swirling motion before sucking it firmly.

Oh, Jeez, Al." Olivia breathed, throwing her head back and grabbing the back of the attorney's neck, pulling her closer.

Olivia moved her legs in between the attorney's, Olivia now lying in between the blonde's thighs. Olivia moved her right hand to Alex's warmth through her lacy panties, feeling the immense wetness already evident. Alex grabbed onto Olivia's hips, pulling her forward, closer to her.

"Let's lose the rest of our clothes," Alex offered. "You included."

Eyes not leaving the other, Alex and Olivia both removed their own bottoms, and Alex her bra, before returning to each other's bodies.

Olivia felt two firm hands clutch her backside, pulling her even closer, her already swollen clit now being forced into Alex's pubic bone. Olivia started to move her body down and to try and bring the blonde to orgasm orally but the attorney held Olivia firmly and the blonde lifted her hips upward, toward Olivia's, thrusting firmly. Then, completely without warning, Olivia felt Alex's fingers in between the brunette's lower lips, stroking her folds and her clit, Olivia practically jumping from surprise.

"Very sneaky, Al…" she moaned.

Alex's skilled fingers began to stroke Olivia's wetness, the detective's body responding by thrusting against Alex's firm fingers. Olivia continued to move against those skilled digits, the pressure to release building quickly.

"That's it, Baby…" Alex encouraged.

Olivia refused to back down. Alex wasn't going to win this…But it felt _so_ damn good.

Olivia reached down in between the attorney and herself, still moving against Alex's fingers, her palmed clit being stimulated at exactly the right spot, Olivia fighting to keep her eyes from rolling. The brunette felt the wetness seeping from her fiancé and immediately thrust two fingers quickly inside of her.

Alex hissed, "Fuck, Liv…" Her eyes closed as her face contorted with pleasure. Olivia could feel Alex's silky muscles contracting around her, pulling Olivia's fingers in deeper. Olivia was more than turned on by Alex's core virtually grabbing the detective's digits inside, sucking them into her. Another surge of moisture found its way from Olivia as she felt her lower lips swollen, ready to be set free. It was becoming impossible to wait.

Olivia began thrusting her hand harder into Alex, adding a third finger and lightly stroking her straining nub with her thumb. Motions from both women became fast and furious, both needing, desiring, to get the other off to quench their own surrender.

Olivia looked down and into Alex's eyes. She was trying so hard not to come. Olivia almost felt badly for her, but her own pleasure was being delayed by her own pride.

"Just come, Alex."

Alex shook her head, "No…" she whispered. "…you first."

Olivia added more pressure to the attorney's clit, pumping harder and faster. Alex continued her own movements against Olivia's sex, Olivia continuing to pump.

A high-pitched, "Uhhhhh….," then a sharp intake of air before a halt in breathing before, "Oooooooohhhhhh, Baby…"

Olivia smiled as a small, yet body shuddering orgasm ripped through the blonde.

"Dammit, Liv," Alex whined, her orgasm causing her body to spasm around Olivia. "You won…"  
Olivia's orgasm came immediately after Alex's, her body bucking against the blonde's hand, riding it out and continuing her ministrations on the attorney until both women's satisfaction was complete.

"Looks like we're getting a kitten…" Alex breathed.

Olivia laughed, sitting up and straddling the blonde again. She leaned down and kissed the attorney. "Let me know when to take some time off for out Montana trip, too."

"But you won, Liv."

"But I love you, Alex, and you would do the same."

"I love you, Liv…" Alex closed her eyes and Olivia climbed off and lay next to her fiancé.

Olivia kissed Alex's shoulder, "I love you, too, Babe."

The two women drifted to sleep, both looking forward spending their last day at the beach house with just with each other.


	26. Chapter 26

26

OOOOOOOO

"Where'd you get that bathing suit, Liv?" Alex asked, brushing her hair into a ponytail and securing the band.

They had spent a lazy Sunday morning in bed and had avocado and jack cheese omelets for brunch, and now were going to spend some time in the sun for their last day.

"It's unattractive, I know…but for a family Sunday beach day, I thought it was more appropriate." Olivia looked in the mirror at her black, one-piece swimsuit. It was a simple spaghetti-strapped, thigh high suit that covered all of the unmentionables.

"No, not unattractive," Alex began, walking up to Olivia. She wrapped her arms around the brunette's waist and kissed her softly. "Sexy as hell because you're in it and I know what's underneath." She kissed Olivia again, grabbing her backside firmly. "Besides, only you and your sexiness could pull it off…I'm gonna go downstairs and get some things ready to take to the beach. You take your time. I'll be on the veranda. Today is about relaxing, Liv. Later, I'll go pick up Kate from the airport and maybe we'll take her for a quick dinner if she feels up to it? What do you think?"

"I think that I love the way you plan everything out. The way those beautiful wheels are always planning, perfecting." Olivia smiled and kissed the blonde's jaw line.

Alex turned and headed upstairs as Olivia put on her short, khaki shorts and then shoved her feet into her black flip-flops. She walked to the sink and began brushing her hair to also place it in a ponytail.

She had had such a wonderful time the past two weeks. She felt as though this paradise, this freedom, would soon be taken away from her. In just a short matter of time, she would be back in the city, back at work, the same stressors that came with being a sex crimes detective—long days, long nights, and little time to take care of herself. She looked in the mirror at the woman in the reflection as she brushed her teeth. She looked happy for the first time in a very long time—perhaps since she first began at the academy. She looked refreshed, younger, and had a definite glow about her.

Olivia knew she was in love, had always known, even before Alex had left and after she had gone. That was why being separated from her hurt so badly. Now, everything seemed to have fallen back into place and life was ideal. Olivia didn't want this ride to end and felt as though it would come to a screeching halt once she stepped foot into the precinct in twelve days.

She looked at herself once more before turning off the light, heading upstairs to join her fiancé.

AAAAAAAA

Families were everywhere on this beautiful Sunday afternoon—parents and children, couples of all ages, surfers half a mile up the coast.

Olivia had just come back from taking an hour long swim, Alex returning to the shelter of the umbrella halfway into the brunette's routine. Alex had joined the detective in her swim, admiring the endurance the detective had in a physical capacity. She always knew Olivia was fit—her job demanded it—but she didn't know exactly how in shape she was. After a solid thirty minutes of non-stop laps, the attorney had to take a break and opted to simply wade, watching as Olivia attacked the water like an Olympic swimmer, before returning to dry land.

"It's such a beautiful day," Olivia breathed, only slightly out of breath, as she dried off lightly with her towel before laying it out the length of the beach lounger and sitting.

"It's absolutely gorgeous," Alex agreed, eyes closed, head back, sunglasses on.

Olivia leaned in between their chairs and reached into the cooler and pulled out one of the bottles of homemade lemonade, made by her blonde fiancé. She took two red cups and filled them halfway, gave the attorney hers, then returned the bottle to the cooler. The detective leaned back, her tanned legs stretched out and crossed, and held her cup out to the Alex, "To us having as wonderful of a time when we get back as we have had here. A blessing in disguise…" Olivia toasted.

Alex felt her lower lip tremble as both women took a sip.

"Al?" Olivia questioned.

""You're absolutely right, Liv. It has been a blessing in disguise. All of it. I'll definitely toast to that. Here, here." The women took another sip.

After a moment, Olivia questioned, "What's in this, Babe?"

Alex grinned. "Lemons, evaporated cane juice, filtered water, and that one bottle has just a _splash_ of vodka."

"Then how come I am starting to lose feeling in my lips and fingertips?"

"I've got two kinds in there…one spiked, one not. It's our last day here. Just enjoy yourself. This will be my only cup of leaded since I have to pick Katie up at five." Alex took another sip. "Damn good."

OOOOOOOO

Olivia leaned her head back. "This is the life, Alex. Eating, drinking, making love, swimming, sleeping, making more love…" Olivia smiled, reaching out for the blonde's hand.

Alex took Olivia's hands into hers, and gazed appreciatively at the huge princess cut diamond as it caught the light and glinted brightly. "This ring, Liv…it's so beautiful on your hand. But, then again, I've always loved your hands…"

The ring tone began to sound from Alex's cell phone inside her canvas bag. She leaned over to retrieve it. "Cabot."

God, Olivia loved that.

Alex sat, listening to the voice on the other end. After a few seconds she looked straight at Olivia. "OK…yeah, she'll be back this evening."

The detective wondered if it was work needing something. They knew she was off for a couple more days, though, unless they needed her to do some research before she went back.

"Well, I'm sorry, Mom…I thought it would be nice to give her a break. I didn't realize she wasn't _allowed_."

_Oh, her mom_.

Olivia looked at Alex questioningly. Alex shook her head and closed her eyes, holding her forehead in her hand. "Yeah, OK…well, she won't have much to do…because Olivia and I spent all day yesterday cleaning and making sure everything was perfect…OK…"

Alex looked flustered and, all at once, suddenly exhausted.

Olivia swung her legs to the sand, leaning over and trying to get Alex—now leaning back with her eyes closed—to look at her and give her a clue.

"All right…" she continued, "I guess we'll see you around midnight, then." Alex depressed the off button and let her hand with the cell in it drop to her side.

"Alex? Everything OK?"

"Yes, and no…"

"_Yes,_ because we're leaving tomorrow morning, thank _God_. _No_ because my parents are flying in tonight and should be here at the house around midnight. They picked the worse possible timing."

"Yes, it's bad timing but we can handle it…" Olivia tried.

Olivia could see Alex's composure fraying. The blonde was on the edge of losing her cool. "Al, what's really going on?"

Alex looked at Olivia, this time not hiding her emotions as a tear rolled down her cheek. She wiped it quickly, as though Olivia might not have seen it. "Her tone…when I mentioned _us_ cleaning and _us_ leaving tomorrow…she gets this _tone_ to her voice…she's put two and two together. Not that I've hidden us…"

Olivia spoke quietly. "But, in a way, you _have_ Al…" Olivia offered. "On the phone the last time you two spoke, you just said that I was here with you to relax…you didn't mention in what capacity."

"It wasn't the right time to mention it…I was confronting her about her cancer. I couldn't just say we're together…that you were my girlfriend…"

"And now, fiancé…"

Alex looked at Olivia and the blonde began bawling, sobbing so badly her breathing became uncontrolled. Olivia had never seen her break down like this. The brunette quickly moved to her chair and embraced her, rubbing her back and rocking her slowly, "Shhhhh…it's OK, Babe."

"But it's _not_, Liv," she mumbled against Olivia's shoulder. "I am a thirty-four year-old woman and my parents still don't get it, they don't accept it. Like I said, they still think it's a phase—that I'm going to find a handsome attorney or doctor and live happily ever after. My going out with women, has been a shame to them. I'm a deviant. In the past ten years since I told them, I have _never_ brought home a woman I've dated, until you. _Ever_. I knew they would never accept it. But with you, I want to tell everyone, shout it from the mountaintops."

Alex pulled away, looking down at her hands as Olivia took them into her own. "My parents are so traditionally conservative it's sickening. My father is much more accepting. My mother, on the other hand…" Her voice weakened as she leaned forward, once again, her forehead against Olivia's bosom.

Olivia stroked Alex's back. "You just have to tell them, Al. Even though it will be late tonight and they'll be tired, it will be the only chance. You have to tell them before we go back so that it doesn't eat away at you. No secrets. Nothing to hide. We're getting married…"

Alex leaned back to look at Olivia and brought her palm up to the brunette's cheek. "You're right. I just have to tell them. My mother needs it spelled out for her, word for word. She doesn't take subtle hints very well. She needs it in black and white and that's how I'll give it to her." Alex leaned in and kissed a smiling Olivia. "No matter the consequences, good or bad, they need to know that you are the love of my life and that I am marrying you and we will be together for the rest of our lives."

"Don't forget the pearly gates…" Olivia smiled, taking Alex's face in a loving hold before planting a savage kiss on her, tongues probing, mouths searching, before pulling away.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Around four o'clock the two women found themselves lugging the big red and white cooler, large umbrella, and bags back down the slatted boardwalk to return to the house. Olivia had partaken in a couple of strong lemonades and was moving much slower and much less coordinated than normal as the cooler weaved in a zigzag pattern, getting stuck on slats of wood as she went. Out of breath, she began laughing.

"God, Al…how much vodka did you put in that lemonade? I feel like I could lie down and sleep until tomorrow morning."

"Just a few shots…" Alex smiled, looking back at Olivia.

"You don't have to drug me to put out, you know…"

They arrived at the house and Alex helped push the cooler through the door. "Liv, I gotta take a quick shower and then head to pick Katie up. I want you to relax but I'll call you and let you know what's going on as far as dinner goes. Maybe, if she's too tired, we'll just come back for a cup of tea and then she can head out."

"You're sure you don't want me to tag along?" Olivia asked, opening the cooler and placing the bottles in the refrigerator.

"No…" Alex said, coming up behind Olivia and sliding her arms around her waist from behind as the brunette closed the refrigerator door. "…because I want to talk all about you with Katie. She wants to hear the details…she's like…the understanding mother I never had…" Alex kissed Olivia's neck and squeezing her breasts before slapping her backside and walking towards the stairs.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Olivia sat on the veranda in her bathing suit, a sheer white beach cover up over it, looking out across the water for, what she felt, might be the last time for a long time.

The detective looked up at Alex as she came out, and smiled. Alex had showered, changed, and was back upstairs in twenty minutes flat. Her damp hair was put in a twist, tight black skinny Capri jeans and white Southampton t-shirt on, black fitted blazer, and black flip-flops. Add her black framed glasses and she was ready to go.

"You look like an ad for a hip arts university," Olivia stated, holding out her hand. Alex walked towards her and took it, sitting on the brunette's lap gently. The blonde clasped her hands behind Olivia's neck and pressed her forehead to the detective's.

Taking a deep breath, the blonde whispered, "Do you feel like time is closing in a bit?"

Olivia nodded, eyes closed. "Yeah…unfortunately." Olivia moved her lips forward and gently pressed them to Alex's, breathing in her redolence.

"I want you to sleep tonight, Liv."

"I want to be there with you if you need me, Al, not sleeping."

"This is something I have to do. I have been in love with you for nine years. My parents know that. But, tonight, they will know that nothing will ever change it. That they can either accept it and accept me or not accept it and lose me."

"Al…" Olivia tried, but Alex put her finger against the brunette's plush, pink mouth.

"I don't care what happens. If they love me, they'll accept you as their daughter-in-law. If they don't accept you and my choice…they'll lose me, plain and simple."

Olivia felt salty tears begin pricking her eyes. "Whatever happens, Alex. It will be OK." Olivia leaned in and kissed her once again, this time opening her mouth and allowing Alex access as the blonde tenderly stroked Olivia's lips and tongue.

Pulling away, Alex whispered, "I'll be back soon…"

She stood, kissed the top of Olivia's head, and walked into the house.

AAAAAAAA

Alex called Olivia from the ride back from the airport and told her that Katie was exhausted and just wanted to go home and shower and sleep. After Alex and Olivia ate leftover pizza and made sure that everything in the kitchen was cleaned and straightened and was ready for her parents, and that the last of their belongings were packed so that they could just wake up and leave the following morning, Alex and Olivia lay together on the sofa in the study—Alex reading the Wall Street Journal and New York Times on her iPad and Olivia halfway through the latest Anita Shreve novel. Alex sat with her feet on the coffee table while Olivia's head rested on her lap.

It was peaceful, yet there was underlying anxiety-riddled electricity in the air. Alex was extremely apprehensive about the conversation she would soon have with her parents in just a few hours.

"I need some mindless TV right now," Alex admitted, turning the TV on and flipping through to check the guide to see what was on.

She settled on an episode of Seinfeld, putting the volume down low so Olivia could read, and then put the remote on her thigh.

Olivia reached over and took the remote, muting the show. "Do you wanna talk, Al?"

Alex stated, "What's there to talk about? Either they'll accept it or they won't" Alex smiled, stroking Olivia's hair around her face.

Olivia looked up at her, her beautiful brown eyes full of love. "Are you prepared for the _won't_ part of it, Al?"

Alex shook her head, her eyes watering. "No, I'm not…but if I have you, that's all I need."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

11:45 p.m. rolled around and Olivia had gotten ready for bed, laying underneath the covers, bedside lamp on, reading, as Alex paced the floor, scrolling through meaningless things on her iPad. A door was heard closing upstairs. The blonde suddenly stopped and looked at Olivia.

"They're home…" Alex said, reaching onto the bed and putting a pair of thick socks on.

"You're _sure_ you don't want me to come up?" Olivia questioned.

Alex walked around to Olivia's side and planted a gentle kiss on her cheek. "If all goes well…I _will_ be coming up to get you…if it doesn't…I don't know."

"Good luck, Baby…" Olivia said softly.

Alex put her glasses on, took another look at Olivia, smiling, and left the room.


	27. Chapter 27

27

Alex made her way up the stairs, her heart beating out of her chest. Once at the top, she took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

"Princess!" a male voice said gleefully. "Oh, my Alex…how is my Buttercup?" Her father took her into a bear hug, squeezing his daughter with joy.

"Oh, Daddy, I'm fine…how was your flight?"

"Long…boring…the usual."

Alex smiled as her father put his arm around her shoulder and she put her arm around his waist and they walked into the kitchen. "The walkway looks beautiful, Alex. You chose a nice stone."

"I thought it was a nice grey," Alex agreed.

Entering the kitchen, Alex instantly saw her mother who was already inspecting the contents of the refrigerator. Alex wasn't sure what exactly she ate these days so Alex had left it the way it was. She stood up and turned around, looking straight at her daughter, her expression unreadable.

"Mom…" Alex began, gingerly approaching her mother. Alex rounded the counter and her mother opened her arms, Alex walking into them.

"Oh, Alex, honey…" her mother breathed. "How are you?"

Mother and daughter separated but Mrs. Cabot ran her hands down Alex's long-sleeved lavender silk pajamas, stopping at her hands and holding them. She took a good look at her daughter, from head to toe.

"Alex, you look incredible. Absolutely beautiful. This time off has agreed with you."

"Thanks, Mom…It has."

Alex's father came back in from bringing one of the suitcases up from downstairs. "So, Alex, tell us how you have been spending your time." Mr. Cabot walked towards the kitchen table and sat, Alex and her mother following suit.

"Well, Liv and I have been going to the beach a lot, we've been cooking, reading, we went into town a couple of times, we had a dinner party Friday and invited her squad…"

Her parents looked at her, waiting for something else.

"Other than that, just a lot of looking out at the water and enjoying the peace away from the city. We went to a bonfire party last Wednesday. Met some new people."

"Any prospects, dear?" he mother asked.

Alex looked unwaveringly at her mother. "Mom, Dad…I need to talk to you…"

Her parents looked at each other and then back at Alex.

"Go ahead, Princess," her father said.

Alex cleared her throat, looking down at her left hand and twisting the ring on her finger. Neither of her parents had noticed her finger until she looked down, fingering the rock. The attorney heard her mother gasp—a loud, audible, shocked utterance.

"Alexandra Elizabeth Cabot, what is that on your finger?" Her mother was a combination of shocked and elated.

"Mom…please…let me talk to you…"

Her mother put her hand over her mouth, trying to withhold her emotions.

"Mom, Daddy…nine years ago, I started in Manhattan at SVU and I told you that I met someone. I had only met her once, but I just knew there was something about her. Right away, I told you that I was gay and that I preferred women, but I had known it well before then. I told you that, at the time, because I knew, when I met Olivia Benson that she was the woman I wanted to be with. We went through a lot together. Our jobs brought us closer and, at first, we were simply friends, then we became best friends, and then we became closer until we were in a committed relationship. Then, I had to leave and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do, leaving everyone and everything behind and becoming someone else. But, there wasn't a day, a minute, a second that didn't go by that I didn't think about her and dream of our future. When I got back, I felt she had probably moved on with her life. I was afraid to contact her and run the risk of being crushed that she might have found someone else. I was sure that a woman as beautiful and big-hearted and intelligent as Olivia would have had suitors knocking down her door."

"Then, we got thrown back into each others' worlds again. This time…it stuck. What was so wonderful before, is even more wonderful now. What sounded like a song before became a symphony." Alex leaned forward, putting each of her hands on top of her parents' on the kitchen table. "I am in love with Liv. I have always been in love with her. She brings me more happiness that I've ever felt in my life, and we're getting married."

Alex waited for something, any kind of reaction. Her father's face was fairly emotionless, save for a slight smile and his squeezing her hand back.

Her mother's face was fallen, her face almost pale with physical exhaustion and shock from her daughter's divulgence and the realization that all of her fears for all of these years were actually true.

"Alexandra Cabot…if this is a joke…" he mother began, her voice tired, strained.

Alex shook her head. "It's not a joke, Mom. Not at all. In fact, it's the most serious I've ever been about anything in my entire life." Alex stood and walked around, kneeling next to her mother, taking her hands in her own. Mrs. Cabot was taking it much harder than her father, which Alex expected.

Mrs. Cabot turned to her husband. "Bill?"

Mr. Cabot shrugged his shoulders and smiled. "She's happy, Catherine. How can we say no to our only daughter's happiness?"

Alex's eyes filled with tears as her face twisted with emotion. Alex stood and hugged her father tightly, her tears and sobs coming stronger now. Alex pulled away, "Thank you, Daddy…I love her…"

"I know, Buttercup…" He stroked Alex's hair and she leaned in for a kiss.

Alex looked back at her mother, who was still staring ahead, now her lower lip trembling with feeling. "Mom…she's the one I was meant to be with. I have no doubt in my heart, my soul, my mind."

Mrs. Cabot finally looked at her daughter. "She can't give us a grandchild…"

Alex could feel her nerves bristling. She didn't feel like arguing that _yes_, Olivia _could_ give her a grandchild, that even _she_ could give her mother a grandchild, but it would have fallen on deaf ears at that moment in time. "We _do_ want children, Mom…when the time is right, we'll find a way." Alex spoke softly, calmly as though talking down a wild, caged animal.

Her mother took her left hand into her own and inspected the ring. "A detective's salary paid for that? Pretty impressive."

Alex fought the rage rising inside of her. "She loves me and she wanted the best for me, no matter the chunk it took from her credit card."

Her mother looked into her eyes. Alex saw nothing but pain there. It broke her heart that she couldn't just be happy for her after all this time.

"So, that's it? You can't be happy for me?" Alex said quietly.

Alex waited a moment, giving her mother a chance to speak, but her mother said nothing, just looked at her daughter with vacant eyes.

Alex stood and took a couple of steps backwards, away from the table. "Olivia and I are leaving very early tomorrow morning. I have to go back to work Wednesday. Call me and let me know if you'd like to come into the city and we can take you out to dinner and celebrate," Alex offered.

"That would be nice, Princess," her father offered.

"Good night," Alex uttered before turning, her whole body beginning to weaken with sobs. She kept her cries silent until she reached the bottom step, walking straight into Olivia's arms.

"Come on…" Olivia coaxed wrapping her arm around Alex and guiding her back to the bedroom.

OOOOOOOO

Once inside, Olivia closed the door. Alex dropped, sitting hard on the bed, her mouth open in silent, anguished sobs. Olivia rushed up to her, sat beside her and held her as the attorney let her emotions out—pain, confusion, torment, rejection.

"Shhhhh…" Olivia rocked slowly, rubbing the blonde's arm as Alex turned into Olivia's body, burying her face in her neck.

After several moments, Alex spoke, her voice fatigued, miserable, "Let's get to bed…I want to go home…"

Olivia knew Alex was exhausted. Olivia guided Alex backwards to the top of the bed and walked around. She tucked her legs underneath the sheets and kissed her softly on her temple, the blonde's swollen, red-rimmed eyes already closed, mouth parted from the beginnings of a stress-induced sleep. Olivia removed the attorney's glasses and folded them, setting them on the bedside table gently. She turned Alex's bedside lamp off and then walked to her own side, setting her cell phone alarm before crawling into bed with the attorney. She turned her own light off and moved in close to Alex, lying on her side, watching as the blonde slept and her own lids became heavy.

Tomorrow, they would have many things to talk about on their way home as a newly engaged couple. Olivia wanted to be there for Alex whenever she was ready to talk.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

The house was dark and eerily quiet when they left at five the following morning. Showering and getting ready, the women did not speak. Olivia could tell, just from her fiancé's demeanor, that Alex was still very emotional and Olivia wanted the blonde to open up when she was ready, not be forced.

With luggage in the car, they kept the top up on the convertible because of the morning, chill. Alex had even worn a thick cardigan and turned the heat on while Olivia drove. Olivia knew that Alex was far too emotional to drive, although her demeanor appeared unfazed, the brunette knew that she was far from it. Olivia reached over with her right hand while driving and squeezed the attorney's knee. Alex's face began relenting, her eyes tearing, her mouth twisting.

"Oh, Babe…no, I'm sorry," Olivia tried, trying to focus on the road and her fiancé simultaneously.

Alex shook her head, "No, it's OK. I just…" She buried her face in her hands, her body shaking. Olivia reached over and rubbed her back in soothing circles. "I want to talk to you, Liv…but when we get back. I can't right now."

Olivia nodded, "I understand. I know…" Olivia smiled as Alex looked at her with the most somber cobalt eyes the detective had ever seen on her fiancé.

Alex reached over and turned the radio on, putting it on a light rock station, as Jason Mraz began to sing about belonging to someone.

After about forty-five minutes of driving, Olivia pulled into a diner gas station. "I'm gonna get us some coffee. Do you want anything, Al?"

Alex shook her head and smiled somberly. "Just coffee."

"OK, I'll be right back." Olivia closed the door and went inside.

After a few minutes, Olivia came back out, two coffee cups with lids and a brown paper bag in hand. She got in the car and handed Alex a coffee, placing her own in the cup holder. "I got a couple of bagel, egg, and Canadian bacon sandwiches, if you're hungry."

"That sounds good, Liv. Thanks."

The women drove in silence, eating their sandwiches and drinking their coffee for the remainder of the drive. When they entered the city, they took the streets that would lead them to Alex's apartment, which they had decided on the previous day, was where they would stay first few days.

Pulling up to Alex's gated garage, Olivia punched in the code that would open the gates. A voice came on the speaker.

"Resident or visitor?"

"Resident. Alex Cabot," Alex leaned over to speak into the intercom."

"Welcome home, Ms. Cabot."

"Thank you, Mario."

The gates opened and Olivia drove through, turning to go up the ramps of the garage and park on Alex's floor.

The women got their bags from the car and Alex sidled up to Olivia, sliding her free arms around her, as they walked to the doors that would lead them inside. Alex looked at Olivia. "Thanks, Liv…" she smiled.

"For what, Babe?" Olivia opened the door.

"For giving me time, for driving, for being here…"

"Forever, Al. I'll never leave your side."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO


	28. Chapter 28

28

OOOOOOOO

Alex and Olivia brought their luggage into the penthouse, deciding the bags could wait until later to be unpacked. They peeled off all of their clothing, and got underneath the duvet cover, too exhausted for anything else. Although it was only eight o'clock in the morning, the recent emotional events and the drive had taken a toll on both women and they both just wanted to sleep for the next few hours.

Olivia lay on the pillow and Alex inched over to her, resting her head on the detective's ample breast. Olivia kissed her forehead and began stroking her hair. "I love you, Babe."

"I love you, too, Liv…more than anything." Alex looked up at Olivia, the blonde's eyes brimmed with tears.

As one fell, Olivia wiped it with her thumb, smiling. "Do you want to talk now?"

"Let's sleep for a while, then we can talk…OK?"

Olivia smiled, pulling Alex closer. "OK, Baby."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

A rarity, Olivia awoke from sleep first, noticing that there were no covers on her, whatsoever. During their nap, Alex had moved all the way down the bed and was curled in a ball at the foot, like a little cat, wrapped in most of the duvet. Olivia laughed to herself before slowly climbing out of bed, so as not to wake her fiancé. She walked naked to her suitcase and pulled out a sports bra, underwear, a white t-shirt and blue running shorts and put them on. As she put her ankle socks on, she glanced at the clock, 12:23. She had slept for four hours. Alex needed the rest. She was emotionally drained and needed the time to recharge before her first day back on Wednesday.

Olivia dug in her bag for her sneakers and took them into the living room to place on her feet. She sat on the sofa, untying them and looking out of the large window overlooking 78th street. The city was beautiful in the midday sun, the light reflecting off the glass of the buildings, and Olivia was ready for a run. She left a quick note on the counter, took the spare key from the hook, put the newspaper that was on the doorstep on the kitchen counter, and headed out for a jog around the streets.

The detective took the elevator down and walked through the front doors of the building. She balanced on a tree and stretched her hamstrings and calves lightly before taking off at a medium pace down the street.

So much had happened in the past couple of weeks, for both women. It seemed like they were both experiencing a wide gamut of emotions in a short nutshell of time. Perhaps, now things would settle down and they could just live again, be happy just being with each other, now that they had entered each other's lives.

Olivia feared going back to work. She knew the person it had made her over the past year, and she didn't like that person. That person had become cold, callused, hard, unfeeling. She knew she never wanted to be that person again.

Before Alex had come back into her life, the detective didn't give a crap about her own welfare—only eating enough to live, only sleeping enough not to go insane, only speaking enough to let people know she was still there. And when she did speak more than two words, it was usually in a tirade to curse someone out until they peed in their pants. Elliot had suggested counseling and she had laughed in his face, telling him he was out of his mind. Even Cragen suggested time off several times, every time Olivia insisting she was fine and to just let her do her job.

She had even gotten to the point that everyone they presumed and assumed was guilty, was a liar. She no longer trusted any _possible_ perps, assumed they were all guilty, and glared at them with animosity. She had been called a bitch by more perps this past year than in all of her years as a cop combined.

Then, she had snapped.

Hitting that father had just happened—an unseen force propelling her hand forward and swinging at him, and then punching him again. She hadn't believed either parent—knew they were _both _lying. The rage was so deep inside of her; she could actually feel her blood boiling, her hands shaking, her veins throbbing.

She saw red and the moment got to her.

But now, that ordeal was over and her suspension was almost over. Looking back, she still couldn't believe she had done it. It was surreal to her that it even happened at all. She couldn't imagine being that enraged again. Now that she was more in love than she had ever been in her life, had Alex to stabilize her, had Alex to calm her down, she wanted to be the better person she had been before. Alex made her _want_ to take care of herself again, _want_ to take care of herself for their future and their future children, and take care of the attorney, in return, and live a beautiful life together.

She wanted to try out new recipes, travel, go to ballets and the theatre, go experience the city again, and go horseback riding of all things. She had never felt so alive as she did with Alex.

The talk that Alex had with her mother had not gone well. Olivia had been at the bottom of the stairs, waiting for her fiancé patiently, trying to hear and listen in case the attorney needed her to step in. Although the detective couldn't hear even a word of the conversation, when Alex came down the stairs, Olivia knew the outcome.

Olivia's heart broke for the blonde. Alex, the ever-pleasing daughter to her parents, the straight "A" student, the perfectionist in sports, academics, and life in general, couldn't please her parents with this one. Even though Olivia had no living parents of her own, she didn't know what it was like but, having Elliot like a brother/father figure was as close as Olivia had to family. Even he hadn't taken their engagement well, albeit for different reasons. Olivia knew that was another conversation left to be had and she wasn't looking forward to it in the slightest.

Olivia ran for thirty minutes straight before heading back to the penthouse. The sky threatened to pour just as Olivia stopped running outside the penthouse building. Panting, she stopped at the same tree she had begun and brought her heel to her backside, stretching her quads, repeating on the other side. She shook her legs out, feeling the tingling in them from a good run, looked at the sky just as thunder rolled across the grey expanse, and then re-entered the building.

She looked at herself in the reflection of the gold elevator wall. Her ponytail was soaked, sweat causing her t-shirt to adhere to her damp, olive skin as she stood with her hands on her hips, pacing the small space, now panting only slightly. Good thing no one else was in the elevator because her outfit had become obscenely transparent from its dampness. The door opened and she stepped out. She headed down the hall and used her key to unlock the door.

"Good afternoon," Alex's voice chirped as Olivia entered the apartment. The blonde was leaning forward on the counter facing the front door, silk robe on, newspaper in front of her.

"Hey," Olivia breathed, smiling. "How's my girl?" The brunette walked up to Alex and stood, not wanting to get her dirty.

Alex put her paper down and reached for Olivia's hips, pulling toward her with force. She began licking the sweat from Olivia's neck.

"Al…I'm disgusting right now…" Olivia closed her eyes and moaned.

"I love it…" Alex continued tonguing and licking Olivia's neck. "You taste amazing. Marshmallows, remember?"

"Uhhhh, I'm not going to argue with you but I beg to differ…"

"I could take you right here, right now…" Alex moaned, pressing her breasts to Olivia's.

"Al…" Olivia groaned, eyes rolling.

Alex pulled away, smiling. "OK…go shower. I'll make us some breakfast."

Olivia kissed Alex briefly and then turned to head down the hallway, turning momentarily to catch the attorney watch her backside as she turned the corner into the bedroom.

OOOOOOOO

Olivia stood, towel-drying her hair, another large, plush yellow towel wrapped around her, as she looked in the mirror. Her eyes shifted to shelves hanging on the left and she viewed the wide assortment of products that Alex had—firming creams, eye creams, wrinkle serums, face masks, gels, cleansers, and moisturizers. She was a virtual Sephora store. She pulled the drawer underneath the sink open and found at least ten different flosses, and four extra, unopened toothbrushes, along with three boxes of unopened toothpastes. Either Alex was a product hoarder or expected quite a bit of impromptu company.

Olivia let her hair fall damp and wavy as she dressed in jeans and a fitted black button down, leaving her feet bare.

She headed down the hallway into the kitchen, "Hey Al…" she began, looking at her feet as she walked, "I could really use a pedi…are there any good—" Olivia stopped in her tracks. "Mr. and Mrs. Cabot," Olivia stuttered. "Wh—"Olivia looked at Alex, her eyes searching.

"Liv, my parents came to talk to us…they wanted to wait until you finished in the shower…" Alex's expression was a mixture of fear and confusion. "I put a pot of coffee on. It should be finishing up now."

Olivia heard the coffee pot near the end of its brewing cycle as it gurgled and sputtered its completion. "I'll get it…" Olivia offered.

"No, Liv…you have a seat. My parents want to talk to you, too." Alex's eyes were pleading, almost desperate.

"Oh, OK…" Olivia walked into the living room and gently sat on the off-white sofa across from Alex's parents. She moved two large throw pillows from behind her and sat further back.

"Well, Olivia…" Mr. Cabot began, "…it is good to see you again…it's been a long time."

"It has, Mr. Cabot. Over five years." Olivia smiled, looking at Mrs. Cabot.

Olivia looked back at Alex, unable to read her expression.


	29. Chapter 29

29

AAAAAAAA

_Poor Olivia. _

Alex wanted so badly to rescue her right now. The look in the brunette's eyes was almost like that of a caged animal, yet she also appeared simultaneously in command, being her usual charming self.

Alex set up the coffee table tray with the essentials for coffee, including some blueberry and bran muffins that her parents brought from one of the best bakeries in Southampton. Alex picked the tray up and carried it to the living room, the metal of the spoons clanging as she walked and her hands shook.

She sat next to Olivia—_right_ next to her, their knees touching.

Alex's mother focused on their legs briefly, and then brought her eyes back up to Alex's, then Olivia's.

Alex's father spoke first, "Your mother and I are sorry to come by unannounced but we had business in the city this afternoon."

Alex looked over at Olivia, who was as calm as could be. Alex began to pour the coffee, handing a cup to everyone.

"When you told us about your Olivia…last night, we have to admit, we were in shock…still are. We don't know much about her other than the one time we met all those years ago and what you've mentioned about her. So, when you informed your mother and I that you were in love with her and would be married…it was extremely surprising…still is."

Alex's eyes began tearing. Olivia, seeing this, handed the blonde a tissue from the coffee table. "Thanks, Babe…"

A moment of silence passed in recognition of their words of love, Mrs. Cabot looking at both women as though figuring out an algebraic theorem.

"It's not every day your only baby girl gets married." Mr. Cabot's voice hitched and he cleared it.

Finally, Mrs. Cabot broke her eyes away from Alex and Olivia and looked at her husband sympathetically, her own eyes filling with tears.

"Olivia…"

"Yes, sir…" she said calmly, taking Alex's right hand with her left into her lap.

"Please, call me Bill…," he smiled.

Olivia smiled back.

"We want to get to know you better, Olivia. Our Alex has never had poor judgment when it comes to figuring people out and letting them into her life. So, if she's in love with you, you must be a pretty wonderful woman."

Alex squeezed her hand and looked at her, tears threatening to overflow.

"Liv is the most wonderful person I know…" Alex's nose and eyes were now running profusely.

Olivia switched hands and put her left arm around Alex, the sides of their heads pressed against each other.

Olivia pulled away looking at Alex and moved her hair behind her ear, "I love your daughter, Mr. and Mrs. Cabot…I love your daughter like no one I have ever loved before. We understand each other. She makes me want to be the best person I can be, not only for us, but for our future."

Mrs. Cabot finally spoke, her voice shaky, "Olivia, dear…" Catherine Cabot's eyes began watering, her lower lip trembling as she continued to speak, "…I can see how much you love our daughter in your eyes…" She looked deep into Olivia's eyes. "I can see it…Alex is a strong, independent woman, but she needs taking care of every now and then…although she acts like it, she's not Superwoman." Mrs. Cabot tried a smile, looking at Alex.

Alex smiled back, her mouth twisted with emotion as she held the tissue underneath her nose.

Olivia began rubbing circles on her back, "I know Alex's strength but I also know her vulnerability," Olivia began. "I also know that she has one of the biggest hearts I've come across but, at the same time can be very stubborn, not backing down for anything. I know there will be many compromises, ups, downs…we'll get on each other's nerves yet we'll support each other and have each other's backs. But one thing I know for sure…"

Olivia looked at Alex's parents, her eyes steady as they shifted between both parents. "I will _always_ love your daughter as I have for the past nine years. Nothing will ever change that and I promise you…I will spend the rest of my life making her happy." Olivia's tears were streaming now, yet her face remained resolved.

By this time, all four were crying. After a few moments of sniffing and tear wiping, the four stood, leaving the coffees and muffins, and began walking towards the entryway. Alex and her father hugged while Olivia and Mrs. Cabot looked at each other awkwardly before Mrs. Cabot opened her arms for Olivia. Olivia carefully stepped into her mother's embrace as Catherine Cabot wrapped her arms around the detective.

Then, it was Mr. Cabot's turn. As Alex embraced her mother, Mr. Cabot held the Olivia's upper arms, looking the brunette over. "She's lucky to have found you, Olivia. Please, take care of her…" The two embraced.

"Always, Bill. Always."

Before leaving, Alex's parents promised to take the couple out for a celebratory dinner the following weekend. They also invited Olivia to the beach house whenever she and their daughter felt like getting away.

All in all, it was a pretty productive morning.

OOOOOOOO

After the drama of the mid-afternoon, Alex and Olivia decided to go to the diner around the corner from Alex's penthouse instead of cooking or eating sugar-laden muffins for their first real meal of the day. Sitting in a booth at Sal's Deli, the waitress brought Olivia a chicken Caesar salad and Alex a side Caesar salad and a bowl of chicken gumbo.

Olivia reached her right hand across the table for Alex's left hand as she chewed, smiling. Alex smiled back, an understanding between the women.

"How do you think it went?" Olivia asked after swallowing.

Alex wiped her mouth, "I think it went very well…considering my parents, especially my mother." Alex fingered Olivia's hand, touching her fingertips gently as she gazed at their hands together. "I think my mother hasn't fully accepted it yet. I'm not sure she ever will but…it's a definite beginning."

Olivia looked into Alex's blue eyes, at her perfect nose, those full pink lips and thought of their future children. Her eyes glazed over as she focused on the attorney's mouth.

"Liv?" Alex smiled. " Earth to Liv…"

"Y—yeah? I'm here…" She smiled, forking another bite of chicken and salad.

"Where were you?"

"When do you wanna get married? Summer?" She put the fork in her mouth.

"Mmmmm..." Alex tried, her mouth full. Once finished, she swallowed and wiped her mouth. "Summer sounds perfect. But we should marry here in New York; the weather shouldn't be too hot."  
Olivia smiled, "No, it shouldn't."

The women finished their meal and then took a walk in Central Park, stopping for frozen yogurt before walking back to the penthouse. By the time they got back to the apartment, the crisp air and the food in their stomachs had added to their friskiness. Olivia couldn't keep her hands off of Alex in the elevator, her fingers pinching, hands groping, mouth searching.

"You're gonna be a great wife, Al. I can hardly wait."

"Mmmmm…." Alex moaned, Olivia's mouth sucking on her nape from behind as they looked at their reflection together in the mirrored gold wall of the elevator as the bell chimed for their floor. The doors opened and a neighbor of Alex's was waiting, looking at the women with intrigue.

"Alexandra Cabot," a male voice questioned. "Who have you got with you?"

Olivia was intrigued as to who this openly forward man could be as they stepped off the elevator, Olivia still wrapped around Alex from behind. The elevator doors closed.

"Bradley, meet Olivia. Olivia, this is Bradley…my _neighbor_…"

"Yes, her _neighbor_ slash interior decorator slash confidant." He held out his hand to Olivia, who placed her hand in his. "So, this is _the_ Olivia Benson I've heard so much about."

"Oh, really…" Olivia began, looking at Alex.

"Constantly talks about you, blah, blah, blah…and once you get a little liquor in her, it gets worse…trust me honey." He brought Olivia's hand to his lips, "Enchante…"

Olivia smiled.

"Well, for a woman, you're right…she is hot." Bradley looked her over. "It's nice to finally meet the object of Alexandra's affection," Bradley continued, pressing the elevator button again, the doors opening. "We'll have to do lunch some time…it was nice meeting you, _Detective_ Benson," he said with a smirk, as the elevator doors closed.

Olivia turned to Alex, smiling and backing her down the hallway until they reached her door. Olivia pushed Alex against the door. "Hmmm, constantly talks about me?"

"Yeah…" Alex grunted as Olivia pressed her hips against the blonde's. Olivia took her in a savage kiss, heated mouths searching as Alex fumbled with the key, blindly attempting to unlock it behind her, while continuing to kiss Olivia.

Finally, the door swung open, the women practically falling onto the floor of the entryway. Olivia closed the door firmly, locking it, and walked right up to Alex, her eyes not leaving the blonde. She grabbed her jaw with both hands planting heated kisses on the blonde's mouth, face and neck, frantic soft kisses, as she pressed her against the wall next to the kitchen.

Olivia pulled off Alex's camel coat off, tossing it on the back of the sofa and then began to unbutton her silk blouse frantically, all the while kissing her mouth, neck, top of her breasts. Alex tried to take Olivia's leather jacket off but the detective was working too feverishly and busily to accommodate it.

"Skin, Liv…I need to feel your skin.

Olivia smiled and took a small step back from Alex, quickly discarding her own jacket and lifting her black button-down over her head without unbuttoning it, while Alex just stood, leaning against the wall panting, knees weak, lust in her eyes. Olivia leaned forward again, putting her hands back on Alex's face, Alex's hands going right to Olivia's clasp on her bra, removing it with ease, Olivia removed it from her arms and the blonde's slender fingers moved to squeeze Olivia's warm, soft flesh.

"Alex," Olivia whispered, moaning, unclasping the blonde's own bra and letting it fall to the floor.

Instantly, their naked flesh was pressed against each other, hands in hair, hot wet mouths searching, kissing, tasting.

"I was beginning to think we had lost that vacation sex charm…" Alex breathed as Olivia sucked her neck.

Olivia smiled, "After two days?" Olivia laughed and then reached down to Alex's backside, lifting the blonde onto the entryway table. "We haven't exactly had the most accommodating of situations to facilitate foreplay and arousal." Olivia pressed her thigh into Alex's jean-clad crotch, feeling the warmth already present.

"Ohhhh, Liv…_please_…I want to feel your skin on me, in me…"

Alex's thighs were quivering so resolutely that the entry way table was rattling against the wall. Olivia took a moment, slightly concerned. She leaned into the blonde, wrapping her in an embrace holding her trembling body tightly. The blonde returned the firm hold.

"Hey…" the brunette started, trying to sense what her fiancé was feeling.

Alex whimpered, "I….I just…"

Olivia tried to pull away to look at Alex but Alex had her back in a firm, loving grip.

"No…don't let go…I just want to feel you, Liv. I love you so much," she whispered. Olivia felt fresh, warm tears on her breast. Alex was crying.

"Babe, you're scaring me…" Olivia tried.

Alex laughed lightly, "Don't be scared, Liv…I just realized that it's all over…all the worrying, all of the heartache…it's all gone and all we have to look forward to is the Heaven that is our relationship…"

Olivia brought her hands down to the blonde's upper thighs, squeezing them comfortingly. This time, Alex loosened her grip enough so that Olivia could lean back and place her forehead on the attorney's. "You're right, Babe. It is all over," Olivia smiled, pressing her lips to Alex's, now tenderly, delicately.

"Let's go to bed, Liv. I want to make love to you for hours, no restrictions, no schedule, no appointments…I want to show you how happy I am to finally be free with you and have you forever."

Olivia pulled Alex off of the table to a standing position and kissed her again. "Sounds like a plan, Al."

Olivia held out her hand and Alex walked into her open arms as the two women walked down the hallway to spend the rest of the afternoon, evening, and night with only one thing on their mind—love.


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N at end! We're nearing the end of this saga!**

30

Thunder rumbled in the near distance as Olivia slowly peeled her eyes open to find Alex's face on her belly, perpendicular to the brunette, her feet hanging off the side of the bed. Olivia smiled, stretching slightly and yawning. She was undoubtedly sore.

The previous afternoon and evening had been spent in bed talking, learning, sharing, making love. They hadn't needed or wanted dinner last night—simply fell asleep in each other's arms around ten p.m. Now, Olivia could hear the rain pinging against the wrought iron railing just outside of the bedroom balcony and the room was darkened more so than usual at 7:00 in the morning. Thunder clapped loudly and then rolled again and, this time, Alex stirred, jumping slightly and clutching Olivia's hip.

"And they're off…" Alex mumbled.

Olivia smiled at her half-awake reference to horse racing and reached for the blonde's back, lightly drawing circles on her bare skin, watching as the goose bumps formed instantly.

"Mmm," Alex moaned, slowly rolling over onto her back, the back of her head now on Olivia's side, eyes still closed. "Is that thunder?" she half whispered, half spoke.

"It is…" Olivia began massaging the crown of Alex's head.

"So, that means we can stay in bed all day...since it's raining?"

"However you want to spend your last day of freedom, Al…"

Alex lifted her head and sidled up next to the detective, placing her head right next to the brunette's on her pillow. "Good morning, Baby…" Alex kissed Olivia's ear, taking her lobe in her teeth and sucking gently.

"Good…mmm…morning," Olivia moaned and, with a surge of pleasure-induced adrenaline, flipped Alex over onto her back, pinning her hands above her on the pillow and straddling her. Olivia hovered over the blonde, looking her naked form over and smiling. She began planting soft kisses on her collarbone, neck, nipples…before settling her hips against the blonde's. She leaned in and gently, meaningfully, pressed her lips to the attorney's.

She felt Alex moan against her mouth as she brought light fingers to Alex's folds, feeling the wetness already there. She began stroking her lightly, Alex widening her thighs to allow further access as her head tilted back further, mouth open.

"Yeah…just like that baby…"

Olivia smiled and continued her ministrations, continuing to kiss Alex's neck and pleasure her nipples as the blonde's moans increased in volume, Olivia's hand now working faster. Within moments, Alex came crashing down against Olivia's hand, thrusting her core into the brunette's fingers to milk the last jolts of her pleasure. She wrapped her legs and arms around Olivia and opened her eyes, a satisfied grin on her porcelain face.

Shaking her head and smiling, Alex closed her eyes. "God, I love you, Liv."

Olivia kissed Alex once more just as Alex's phone beeped a text message. Alex reached over, still underneath Olivia, and grabbed the phone, pressing a button and then moving it further from her face to try and focus without her glasses.

"Anything exciting?" Olivia questioned, sliding off of her fiancé and beginning to move to the edge of the bed, placing her feet on the floor and reaching her arms in the air to stretch.

"Not really…" Alex came up behind the stretching brunette and cupped her breasts and kissed her neck, letting her teeth sink in possessively.

Olivia placed her hands over Alex's and closed her eyes, falling into her touch.

"Where are you going, Babe?" Alex questioned. "Come back and lie down," she whispered.

Olivia did as she was told, her body very much ready for a release after pleasuring her fiancé. She propped herself on her elbows as Alex positioned her head between the brunette's legs. Olivia smiled down at the grinning attorney. Once Alex's mouth was on Olivia, the detective lost all control. It didn't take long for Olivia's body to vibrate with pleasure, her body bucking wildly against the blonde's mouth.

Olivia recovered, head resting on the pillow, panting and coming down from an intense orgasm. Alex's cell phone beeped a text again.

"Popular girl…" Olivia breathed.

"It's the dry cleaners telling me they'll deliver my dry cleaning some time between two and four."

"Mmmm…" Olivia responded, still enjoying her afterglow.

"I gotta start wearing suits again…" Alex's tone was almost disdainful.

"I, personally, can't wait to see you getting ready for work every morning, slipping one of those tight suits on…mmm, makes me hot just thinking about it." Olivia smiled, eyes still closed.

At that moment, Olivia's stomach let out a huge rumble. She opened her eyes and froze, smiling before both women broke into laughter.

"Let's get something to eat, Babe. How about my famous whole grain banana and blueberry pancakes with honey maple butter?" Alex said, sitting up.

Olivia leaned in to kiss Alex. "You're speaking my language." She kissed Alex again. "We might gain three-hundred pounds together, but at least we'll be happy."

"Not the way _we_ burn it off…as long as we have an equal balance of calories consumed per calories burned ratio during sex, we're fine," Alex kidded, standing and placing her robe on.

"Oh, yes…you'll definitely make a wonderful wife."

AAAAAAAA

With breakfast having been eaten, dishes done, and a load of clothing from the trip in the wash, Alex and Olivia sat of the sofa after having had a quick shower after breakfast became a game of _who can feed the other and clearly miss their mouth every time_?

Now, sitting on the sofa, Alex's back against the arm, one leg tucked underneath her, the other on Olivia's lap, while Olivia sat with her legs on the large ottoman in front of her. Alex had a stack of file folders on the floor next to the sofa and her laptop on her lap while Olivia held a pencil in her teeth, crossword puzzle on her lap, massaging Alex's free foot with both hands.

"Hey Al…nine-letter word for mental flexibility…"

Alex thought for a moment then said, "Dexterity."

Olivia looked at her for a moment, smirking, "_God_, you're sexy," and then wrote it down.

Just then, the doorbell rang. Olivia looked at Alex.

Alex smiled. "Why don't you get it, Babe?"

Olivia said, "No problem, Schnookums…" and leaned over and kissed Alex briefly before walking to the door.

Alex followed stealthily, unbeknownst to Olivia. Olivia opened the door and no one was there. She turned around and collided heads with Alex, the two laughing.

"Look down, Liv," Alex hinted.

There, on the doorstep, sitting on the damask welcome mat, was a tiny, gray and white tabby kitten of no more than eight weeks old, big pink satin bow tied around its neck, mewing away, looking right up at the women with big, blue eyes.

"Surprise," Alex whispered, wrapping her arms around Olivia briefly and kissing her cheek.

Olivia bent down and scooped the tiny ball of fur into her hands, holding it against her chest, rubbing her face against its closed eyes. Alex could hear it purring like a motorboat.

Olivia looked at Alex. "Oh, Babe…ours?"

Alex nodded. "Ours."

Olivia walked into the living room, sitting on the sofa. She lifted the tiny creature into the air, looking at its underside. "Girl?"

"Supposed to be…" Alex looked with Olivia. "I don't see any _business_ down there."

"I don't see any _business_, either…or any _junk_," Olivia kidded.

"Would you rather I say testicles?"

"Anything to cause you discomfort, Al…" Olivia smiled and leaned over to Alex, kissing her softly. "This is one of the best gifts I've ever gotten…besides my engagement ring…" She kissed Alex again, this time, lingering.

"What should we name her?" Alex asked.

Olivia set the kitten down on her lap and she began crawling over to Alex, climbing up her thighs as the attorney began petting her softly.

"Let's name her after a strong female…," Olivia began, "…how about Sacagawea or O'Connor after Sandra Day, or Eleanor after Roosevelt, or Hillary after Clinton…maybe even Diana after Princess…or Amelia as in Earhart…or Maya as in Angelou…and then, there's always Oprah…"

"Wow…" Alex commented, "…talk about sexy…How about Queen Latifah?"

Olivia laughed and then smiled as the kitten began crawling from Alex's shoulder to Olivia's.

"What do _you_ think, Liv?"

The kitten had nestled in the crook of Olivia's neck and closed her eyes, the detective supporting her underneath with her hand. "I think I like Hillary. What do you think?"

"I think it's perfect." Alex kissed Olivia's neck and Olivia turned to face her fiancé, kissing her softly. The kitten purred against Olivia's ear.

**A/N: Next up: Alex back to work; Elliot lunch & talk; Olivia goes back but will she stay?**


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N: This is the second to last chapter. Thank you to those who have stuck with it. I hate to end it, but, like I said, there will be a sequel consisting of one-shots. If you enjoy my writing, please favorite me so you can receive other notifications for stories I write.**

**Thank you!**

**Patricia **

**Side note: I reference a song. In 2009, Empire State of Mind was out. **

31

Alex entered the kitchen at 7:30 a.m. on Wednesday morning, crisp black, fitted, pencil skirt on, starched white shirt, and red cashmere cardigan. Her long hair was down and parted in the middle, her glasses already on.

_Hot Damn_, Olivia thought, looking up from her coffee cup as the blonde entered. Olivia smiled broadly and leaned her elbows against the kitchen counter, shifting on the stool she was sitting on.

"Good morning…again," Alex kissed Olivia and the blonde smiled when she saw Hillary curled up on the brunette's lap, sound asleep. "She ate and played and now she's tired, huh?" Alex lightly scratched behind the kitten's tiny ear, earning a tiny mew from the sleeping animal.

"Kinda sounds like our beach house routine…doesn't it?" Olivia offered.

Alex stopped in front of Olivia and tucked a stray piece of hair from her ponytail behind her ear. "I'll call you and text you and you'll be on my mind all day," Alex whispered before leaning into the brunette and planting a soft, warm kiss on her lips. "I'm due for an arraignment at 8:00, so…I gotta go…If you hadn't distracted me this morning in the shower, I might have had more time," Alex smirked, picking up her attaché and throwing her coat over her arm. She walked up to Olivia once more and kissed her fully, a slight tease of her tongue. "I love you…"

"I love you, too, Al. Have a wonderful day…"

Olivia kissed Alex once again and she was off, through the front door, waving goodbye, and closing it behind her. Olivia sighed, staring at the door that had just closed. Just then, her cell phone in her loose, faded blue pajama bottoms' pocket sounded. Hillary jumped slightly, but went right back to sleep. Olivia lifted and then cradled her in the crook of her left elbow and then retrieved her cell phone with her right, pressing the button on the way to her ear. "Benson…"

"Hey, Liv! Good morning! Are you back in town?" Elliot's enthusiastically loud voice questioned. There was some sort of appliance on in the background.

"Hey, El…yeah…we got back Monday." Olivia walked to the sofa and put the sleeping kitten on the sofa cushion and then walked to gaze out of the window at the city below.

"Well, I'm headed into work in a few minutes, but I wanted to take you to lunch and just talk…do you have time today?"

"Uh…yeah…about what time, El?" Olivia took the phone from her ear and glanced quickly at the time, _7:35_.

"How about 12:00? If anything changes, I'll call. I can pick you up…"

"OK…I'm staying at Alex's for a couple more days and then we're going to my place."

A small silence.

"El?"

"I'm here…sorry. Just looking at some math homework of Dickie's that he left for me to check. OK, 12:30 at Alex's. I'll be there. See you then…"

The call was disconnected and Olivia pressed _end_ and placed it back in her pocket. She reached her hands toward the sky, her faded black t-shirt riding up to her ribcage, and let out a stretch, Hillary squeaking out a mew from the sofa at the brunette's stretching noises. Olivia folded her arms and smiled as she looked at the tiny fur ball with love.

So, she would have lunch with Elliot. He seemed to be in a good mood but, knowing him, that could change within a heartbeat. One perp, one case, one call from his wife, could set him off for the day. Olivia thought about what she would say during their lunch as she quickly did the dishes in the kitchen, setting them on the rack to dry. Last time they spoke, he was upset about the way he found out about the engagement. In a way, Olivia couldn't blame him—couldn't blame Alex's parents, either. It's not that they had been secretive about their relationship with strangers, but this whole expressing themselves and having an open relationship, especially with family and close friends, was a new concept to both of them. Even when Olivia had had other boyfriends/girlfriends/lovers, she rarely appeared in public with them. They never really mattered to her…until Alex.

With Alex Cabot, she wanted everyone to know and didn't care of their reaction, good or bad. She had never been more in love with anyone in her life. Wiping her hands on the dishtowel, she folded her arms, smiling. A quick run, a weight session in Alex's building weight room—which was quite luxurious, even had a sauna—and she would be mentally prepared for her lunch with Elliot Stabler.

She and Alex had set aside the guest room for Hillary, providing her food, water, a litter box and a small bed of blankets and towels. They had decided that it was a safe place for her to be when both women ever happened to be away from the penthouse; they knew they'd have to set something up at Olivia's place, too.

In order to get a few things done before noon, Olivia picked Hillary up and put her on the blankets in the room and closed the door.

AAAAAAAA

Alex got to her office with five minutes to spare. Putting her coat on the coat rack next to the door, she retrieved necessary papers from her leather attaché and then placed the folders on her desk. Hearing the ping of a text message, she picked it up from her desk. She opened the message and a close-up photo of Liv and Hillary's face, Olivia smiling broadly, popped on the screen. Alex's composure left her briefly, before remembering her appointment in court, and she smiled and sniffed.

A knock was heard at her door, immediately followed by it opening. "You ready?" Thomas, one of her interns, questioned, smiling.

"As I'll ever be," Alex smiled, picked up her folders, and headed out the door.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

Alex had a busy, non-stop morning. One arraignment lasted only twenty minutes, bail being posted with no chance of being paid by the defendant. These were the cases Alex liked best—keeping the person locked up until the trial. After that one, another arraignment of a wealthy "pillar of society", accused of harassing and fondling his co-workers—and evidently much more—in which no amount of bail would keep him locked up for a second longer. These were the cases she hated, the ones where money could even set an assumed molester free, even if for one night, risking him or her striking again.

After that arraignment, she had a meeting with the DA about the blonde giving an eight-week long class to NYPD rookies on procedures and legalities that they would be required to know before becoming officers. Picking up a second travel cup of coffee for that morning from a food truck, she smiled to herself as she walked back to her office.

Closing herself in her office, she put her case down on her desk, took her cell phone out, and then moved to the small sofa, dropping herself into it. It was 11:00 a.m. She pressed the number that would call her fiancé, taking a sip from her cup.

"Benson."

"You know it's me…"

Olivia laughed, "I know you like hearing me say that, just as I love hearing you say _Cabot _when you answer the phone."

"I do…I absolutely do…" Alex smiled.

"How is everything going your first day back?" Olivia offered.

"Busy. Non-stop. I am just now coming back to my office from my first arraignment at eight. They want me to teach a class for the rookies about legal procedures. It starts in May and lasts eight weeks."

"Hmmmm, that sounds interesting. Maybe I could help you prepare…" Olivia sounded winded.

"What are you doing?" Alex laughed.

"Walking down the hallway to the elevator. I just finished in your building's weight room. I just had a sauna."

"The life of Reilly…"

Alex heard a pause.

"I'm sorry, Liv…I didn't mean—"

"No, no…Alex. I didn't take it as anything."

Alex heard the door being unlocked.

"Elliot is taking me to lunch at noon," Olivia said. "I'm kind of nervous about what kind of mood he'll be in and what his reaction will be to our announcement that night."

"Just be calm, Liv. Whatever his reaction, remember, it's his problem if he gets upset. Those are his issues. He knows, that's that. You'll be fine."

"He sounded happy this morning when he called right after you left. We'll see."

"It'll be fine…" Alex looked at her watch. She had a working business lunch meeting in thirty minutes. "Look, I'll call you later to see how it went but, Liv…"

"Yeah, Babe…?"  
"You'll do fine. I love you…"

"I love you, too, Baby. Have a wonderful lunch, Al."

"You, too." The call was disconnected and Alex sat, smiling for a few minutes before straightening up her desk, grabbing her coat and throwing it over her arm, getting her purse, and heading out the door once again.

OOOOOOOO

Olivia drank her fifth glass of water for the day as she stood, freshly showered and changed into a pair of dark jeans, a charcoal gray v-neck sweater, and gray boots, her hair blow-dried straight. Elliot would be there any minute. She had already played with Hillary for the morning, tiring her out with a feather toy, and now the tiny kitten was sound asleep on her make-shift bed on the guest room floor, safe and happy.

Olivia's ringer on her cell sounded and Olivia pressed _talk_.

"It's me," Elliot breathed. "I've got a great parking space down here in front. Meet me down here."

Olivia smiled, "OK. I'll be down."

Olivia grabbed her leather jacket, her purse, phone, and keys, and locked the apartment, headed downstairs to meet her partner.

OAOAOAOAOAOAOAOA

So far, lunch was going well—but they hadn't breeched the engagement subject yet. They sat in a booth at LaRue's, a Cajun Restaurant in Chelsea, having just ordered. Olivia lifted her glass to her lips and sipped, already feeling like she had imbibed more than enough water thus far.

Elliot looked at her, arms folded and elbows on the table, analyzing, a slight smile on his face, his eyes scrutinizing. "You look good, Liv…how was the rest of your stay at the beach house?"

"It was good, El. Very relaxing." She looked at Elliot, watching as the wheels turned in his mind.

"So, you and Alex…"

"Yep…me and Alex."

"How long, Liv? I mean…actually together?"

"That's hard to explain…" Olivia ran her hand through her hair, taking another sip of water.

"Try me…" Elliot's gaze was determined.

Olivia watched his unwavering expression. "Before she left, we had been together for about eight months, closer to nine, as a couple. Before that, we had gradually gotten close throughout those first four years she worked with us. We were friends for a long time before it turned into anything else."

Elliot nodded, "So for four years you were friends and then it turned into…more?"

"Yes, Elliot. You see…there are parts of our relationship that you know nothing about…the fact that we got acquainted slowly…a drink here, a dinner there, then when we became friends, she came over and we'd talk, have dinner, watch movies or TV. Then, our friendship grew and so did our closeness and, over time, we realized we needed, wanted, each other."

Elliot nodded slowly, studying her words, her expressions. The waitress brought their food to the table, setting the plates in front of them, Elliot's gaze not leaving Olivia.

"Then, she was taken from me and I suffered—she suffered—and then she came back. We both realized how much we never stopped loving each other…" Olivia's eyes began to water. "I didn't realize how much it had affected me, how much I had changed after she left. Looking back, I can see now why I acted so angry at work, in my personal life…I was so unhappy and didn't know why…"

"And now…? Elliot questioned, cutting his po' boy in half with his knife.

Olivia smiled, placing her napkin in her lap and looking down as she smoothed it. "And now…it's more perfect than I could have ever imagined." She lifted her fork and poised it over her blackened fish salad, staring at it and smiling.

Elliot smiled. "I'm happy for you, Liv. I've only always just wanted to see you happy. That's all. You deserve it. If Cabot ever breaks your heart, I'll break her legs…" Elliot smiled before taking a bite.

Olivia looked at him, smirking, "I'm sure she'd have a counter threat for that one, El."

"Oh, I'm sure she would."

AAAAAAAA

Alex entered the front door of her penthouse at 6:15 p.m., glad to be home. When she saw Olivia, iPod on, dancing around the kitchen, stopping briefly to stir something on the stove, the blonde stopped and smiled as she slowly and quietly put her coat on the hat rack and set her belongings down. The song was so loud through Olivia's ear buds that Alex could hear "_Empire State of Mind"_ by Jay-Z playing from just feet away.

Alex watched Olivia. Her fiancé had some sexy moves—hips swaying, butt shaking, eyes closed and in another world. She opened her eyes and jolted, jumping ten feet in the air, clutching her chest as she saw Alex.

"Jeez, Alex!" Olivia pulled the buds quickly from her ears, leaned over, clutching the counter, practically putting her head in between her knees, and then stood up again.

Alex grinned, walking around the counter into the kitchen. Olivia looked so cute in her extremely short, cut-off jean shorts, white tank, and dark gray hoodie hanging unevenly from her elbows, her clipped hair half up and half down. She was barefoot and had a new berry color on her toenails, indicating she had obviously found a salon that day.

"I'm sorry, Babe. I didn't mean to scare you."

"My heart is racing…" Olivia took Alex's hand and pressed it to her breast.

Alex grinned at the detective, "Hmmm…I like this foreplay…" Alex leaned in and suckled Olivia's neck, apply pressure and flicking her tongue across smooth skin.

"Seriously, Alex...I think I might have had a minor heart attack or at least palpitations…" Olivia took a deep, calming breath, and then smiled at her fiancé. She wrapped her arms around Alex's neck, kissing her softly. "How was the rest of your day, counselor?" Olivia pressed her lips to Alex's.

Alex's hands went to Olivia's butterfly clip, removing it and running her hands through the brunette's soft waves. She smelled amazing and Alex just wanted to lose herself in the detective after her non-stop busy day. Her hands slid down Olivia's shoulders, back, waist, and landed on her ass, grabbing it firmly, "I missed you, today, Liv."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Alex took Olivia's lower lip into her mouth, sucking it lightly as she shifted her hands around to the brunettes' hardened nipples.

"Well, you'll be impressed…I have an actual soufflé in the oven," Olivia tried, pulling the attorney's face to her now-heaving cleavage.

"Oh, yeah? What kind?" Alex continued pulling Olivia's tank down, kissing the soft skin of her breasts.

"Uh…a cheese soufflé…with tomato basil sauce…" Olivia's hands went to Alex's hair, tugging and fingering it.

"Aren't soufflés known to fall if not watched?" Alex pulled away, peering into the oven. She lifted the lid on the stove and spooned a bit of tomato basil sauce and tasted it. "Mmmm, delicious."

Olivia slithered her arms around the blonde from behind. "Timer says three more minutes. Then it's the moment of truth."

They both stood, swaying to no music in particular, enjoying their closeness after being apart for the day. Alex could feel Olivia inhaling next to her ear, her breathing steady.

When the timer went off, the women continued to sway.

"I wanna hear about your lunch," Alex could hear the exhaustion and contentment in her own voice.

Olivia whispered, "Let me take this masterpiece out and we can talk over dinner. We can take a bath later?"

"Sounds like a perfect evening," Alex kissed Olivia once again and then released her to get their dinner and spend the rest of the evening enjoying each other.


	32. Chapter 32

**Final Chapter!**

**A/N at the end!**

32

Olivia brought the soft washcloth from the water and wrung it out, the drops sounding like tinkling music on a piano. With Alex sitting in between the brunette's legs in the garden tub, leaning against Olivia's front, the brunette smoothed the suds over Alex's left shoulder, traveling down her arm, lifting her hand and washing her pruned fingers. Alex's body was completely relaxed against Olivia's, eyes closed, head resting on the detective's shoulder. Olivia peered around to see the attorney's mouth turned up in a slight smile, her face damp and slightly flushed from the heat of the water.

"So, it went well…" she moaned, her voice heavy with serene languor.

"Yeah…he had some questions…still not understanding how he didn't know or realize what was going on with us…pretty sure his ego was more hurt, I think, than anything."

"Always in charge, right?" Alex murmured.

"That's Elliot."

Olivia squeezed the water from the washcloth over Alex's breasts before running the washcloth over them, earning a low moan from the blonde. Olivia left the washcloth floating in the water and brushed light fingertips over Alex's nipples, her back arching up from the touch. Alex turned her head and opened heavy-lidded eyes and parting her lips. Olivia leaned in and pressed her lips to the blonde's plush mouth, Alex reaching around for Olivia's neck.

The kiss turned heated, searching, Alex sat up and turned to face the brunette, on her knees, in between Olivia's parted legs. Alex ran her fingers though Olivia's damp locks as Olivia ran her fingertips down Alex's shoulders, arms, brushing the sides of her breasts, waist, hips, luxuriating in the feel of her smooth skin and the sounds coming from the attorney.

"God, I want you, Liv…I'm so exhausted but I want you so badly…" Alex whispered.

Olivia reached forward, grabbing the blonde's ass with both hands and squeezing firmly. "I'll meet you in the bedroom…" Olivia stood, grabbing a towel and wrapping herself, heading out the door, turning back and smirking at a still-kneeling Alex.

Olivia dried off and slipped underneath the thin sheet, waiting for Alex to join her. She propped her head on her elbow and smiled, waiting. When Alex emerged, a towel wrapped around her, the brunette smiled and patted the bed. Alex walked toward the bed and dropped her towel, Olivia reaching out instantly.

Alex climbed under the sheet and faced Olivia. The blonde reached for Olivia's jaw and caressed it with her thumb before leaning closer and kissing the detective.

Olivia took the blonde's hand and brought it to her lips, kissing it delicately. She then straddled Alex and took both of her arms and spread them out on either side of her, holding her wrists, the brunette gently kissed each nipple, hardening from her touch and earning a low growl from Alex.

"I'm on fire, Liv…touch me…"

Olivia, continuing to hold the blonde's wrists, pulled her arms down to her sides and then let go, moving lower in between Alex's spread thighs.

"Uhhhhh…I want you, Liv…"

Olivia grinned as she hovered over Alex's trembling core, licking her lips before placing her warm mouth on Alex's tight bundle and sucking gently.

"_Olivia_…" Alex's head tilted back, a look of near anguish on her porcelain face, her cheeks flushed bright crimson. "Make me come, Baby…please."

Olivia began running her tongue along Alex's silky slit, probing deeper and deeper with each repetition. Olivia took a moment to spread Alex further, causing her tongue to now plunge deeper into the attorney. Olivia suddenly felt her hair being pulled lightly as Alex's hips gyrated against the brunette's working mouth.

The blonde's breathing now came in pants, erratic breaths that signaled her impending release. Alex lifted her hips, attempting to make more contact as her breath froze and she squealed, "Ooooohhhh…" and then let out a deep breath followed by a series of moans until her contractions ceased rolling throughout her core. A trail of milky white left the attorney and Olivia smiled, lapping it up before kissing Alex's thighs gently.

Olivia moved upward, putting her head on her pillow and looking at her fiancé. Alex was spent—her head still tilted back, mouth open. Olivia smiled and brought her hand to the blonde's face, moving a piece of blonde hair that had fallen over her eyes, however unnecessary—Alex was on her way to sleep.

"You know me so well, Liv…" she tried slowly, barely audible.

Olivia moved closer to Alex, reached down and pulled the thin sheet up to cover them, wrapping the covers and her arm around the blonde. The detective pressed herself against the warmth of Alex's body and kissed the top of her head.

Olivia closed her own eyes as she heard the low, steady breathing from the blonde in her arms, knowing she was already asleep. She smiled and pulled her closer as she, herself, drifted off into dreamland, as well.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

The following days were spent with Olivia in a sort of routine. She awoke with Alex, made coffee and breakfast for the blonde and herself, Alex would leave around 7:30, and then Olivia would go on a run outside in Central Park, iPod blaring, come back and do a weight routine in the building gym, and then hit the building pool or sauna. It had become a routine and it was a morning groove that the brunette enjoyed immensely. The brunette had spent the past ten days, especially during those morning runs and workouts, thinking about what she could possibly do if she felt the same rage and stress, when she returned to work, as she did before.

Then, around five or six every evening, Alex would walk through the door, looking sexy and predatory in her skin-tight ensembles, Olivia would serve dinner and the two would talk about their day over their meal, do the dishes together, get _handsy_, watch TV or fool around, and eventually end up in bed.

Olivia joked that she felt like a kept woman and Alex said that as long as she was the one keeping her, she was all for it.

It was Sunday evening and they had spent whole weekend relaxing together. Alex treated Olivia to a spa day in Manhattan that day and they spent three hours relaxing with facials, hot stone treatments, massages, pedicures, manicures and bikini, leg, and lip waxes. Afterwards, they ate at Olivia's favorite Mediterranean restaurant for a dinner of kebabs, hummus, and tabouli, and then returned home.

It was the night before Olivia would go back to work and she and Alex were sitting on the sofa, watching an episode of _Cold Case_, Olivia lying down the length to the right of Alex, her head in the attorney's lap, facing the TV, while Hillary sat curled up on Alex's left, against her hip.

Alex stroked Olivia's hair softly, playing with her earlobe gently. Olivia turned from facing the TV to look up at Alex, noticing the attorney's eyes glazed over on the TV. Olivia then rolled onto her back, head still on Alex's stomach. The attorney looked down at the brunette. Olivia smiled and took the Alex's hand that had been caressing her ear and hair and brought it to her mouth, kissing gently.

"You ready for tomorrow?" the blonde questioned.

"Not really…" Olivia smiled, her eyes watering instantly. "I've enjoyed being a housewife."

"And the bathtub has never shone brighter." Alex smiled, squeezing Olivia's jean-clad thigh.

"Oh, you love a clean, sparkling house. Admit it. You, in all your just-so'ed-ness."

"There are certain things that shant be compromised, my love." Alex leaned down and kissed Olivia, tonguing her lips before pulling away.

Alex's face turned serious, "But really, Liv…how are you feeling about tomorrow?"

"I think about it and I dread it, Al. There's a burning twisting in my stomach when I think of going back and being bombarded by case after case. When we bring someone in, it turns my stomach to look at them. Closing the cases feels good but it's the in-between that eats away at me, the finding evidence and grilling the suspects, the rape kits, the dark stuff..."

Olivia bent her knees and Alex put her hand on the brunette's right knee, squeezing gently.

"Well, you mentioned starting a support group for victims of rape, incest, and sexual abuse and assault and you mentioned teaching at the Academy. How are those things sounding now, after you've had a chance to mull them over?" Alex's hand stroked Olivia's shin.

"They sound good, actually. It might take a while to get used to doing something else, but I think the stress level would be lower and I would still be supporting causes I love and doing what I know."

"Very true…" Alex's hand slipped underneath Olivia's jean leg and began lightly stroking her smooth legs. "And…it would give you time if you wanted to, say…oh, I don't know…have a baby?"

Olivia sat up and turned her torso to face Alex. "What's that?"

"I'm just saying…you would have more time and less stress to be a mother, if you wanted…" Alex put her hand on Olivia's shoulder and then traveled up to cup her neck. "You know you would make the best mother, Liv."

Alex leaned in for a kiss, her hot breath sending tingles to Olivia's core.

Pulling away, her eyes still closed, Olivia said, "How about we, at least, tie the knot first." She opened her eyes and smiled.

"First things first, right?"

"Right."

AAAAAAAA

Alex felt the bed shake as Olivia tossed and turned all night—even after the brunette had been satiated multiple times the previous evening. Alex awoke, at 3:30 a.m. to a loud crashing sound in the kitchen. She quickly put her arms through her robe and rushed down the hallway, tying the belt as she went.

"Liv?" she questioned.

Olivia stood up and put a package of meat in the freezer and then bent down again and put a bag of frozen peas in the freezer. "I'm sorry, Al…" Olivia said with remorse. "I was just getting some orange sherbet and the freezer's packed so full, everything fell out…"

Alex's eyes went wide. "Jesus, Liv…your toe!"

Olivia looked down and saw that her right big toe was bright red and blue and was almost twice as big as her left. "What the hell?" she questioned, now hobbling to the table to sit.

Alex retrieved the bag of peas Olivia had just put in the freezer and Olivia raised her foot onto the chair next to her before Alex put the frozen bag on top, holding it there.

"Liv? Are you OK?" She looked at the detective as she squatted in front of her.

"Yeah…I guess when that steak fell out…"

"No, I mean…are you OK about work tomorrow—I mean today?"

Olivia shook her head quickly, her lower lip trembling. She brought her lips inward, trying not to cry but it was pointless, her eyes filled with tears, nonetheless. "No, but I have to go, even if it's to tell Elliot and Cragen I can't do it anymore." She began crying uncontrollably now.

Alex stood and embraced her fiancé.

"God, I wish we could just be together all day every day like the beach house, no cares, only us. I feel like real-life is just too much sometimes, you know?" Olivia rested her cheek on Alex's shoulder.

Alex could sense Olivia's exhaustion from her voice. "Let me get you some of that sherbet," Alex offered.

Olivia nodded, holding the peas in place as Alex went back into the kitchen.

Olivia continued, "I just don't know what I'm gonna feel tomorrow. I feel like my time off has almost made me forget what it's like to feel as hopeless and burned out as I did just a month ago." She looked at Alex who was scooping and keeping her eye on Olivia. "Does that make sense?" the detective inquired.

"It makes total sense, Babe." Alex said, putting the carton back in the freezer and bringing two small bowls with spoons to the table. She set them down and then lifted Olivia's foot, sat, and then rested it on her lap, returning the frozen vegetables. "You're not gonna know how you feel until you go back. All of the anger and emotions might come flooding back or you could have a renewed sense of love for the job. You'll just have to see, Liv."

"You're right, Al." Olivia sniffed, regaining her composure.

"Just know…" Alex reached over and placed her hand on Olivia's, "…you don't _have_ to do anything you don't want to. You have other options."

"I know…" Olivia looked at her with adoration, love, and relief. "Thank you, Al." Olivia leaned over and kissed the attorney with absolute love.

Alex lifted the peas to inspect the detective's toe. "Not too bad."

"The only thing bad was your freaking out, Al." Olivia smiled. "Are you gonna freak out like that when our kids get a nose bleed or a scraped knee? Screaming bloody murder?"

Alex shook her head. "I'll have you to calm me down," she smirked.

"Yes, you will, Babe. Yes, you will."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

It was 6:45 a.m. and Olivia was a nervous wreck—exhausted and frazzled. When she got like this, Alex knew not to rattle her further. As the two women stood at the bathroom sink vanity, Alex brushing her hair and still in her robe, the blonde eyed Olivia in the mirror next to her as she attempted to apply lipstick, her hand shaking mercilessly.

The detective stopped suddenly and shook her hand out, willing the tremors away. "Shit!" she whispered. "What's _wrong_ with me?" She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, putting the lipstick tube down and placing both hands on the marble sink counter below her.

Alex set her brush down and put both hands on Olivia's shoulders from behind, resting her chin on her right shoulder and rubbing her back. "It's gonna be OK, Liv. Remember, it doesn't _have_ to be permanent if you don't want it to be…"

Olivia turned into Alex's body and let herself be enveloped in a soft, warm hug, the brunette clutching Alex's ribcage tightly. She whispered against Alex's ear, "Let's stay home…make love all day…go to the park, laze around…" Olivia pulled away, tears threatening to spill.

Alex tilted her head, feeling her own eyes tearing as she looked at the beautiful bronze face in front of her, make-up simple yet precise. "Baby, I don't need to tell you that you have to…even if it's just for a couple more weeks…"

Olivia nodded and looked down. Alex lifted her chin with her forefinger, Olivia looking back into her eyes.

"You're right." Olivia smiled.

And with a newfound, sudden sense of confidence, Olivia took a deep breath, smiled once again, kissed the blonde, and took a step away, brushing herself off. "How do I look?" She stood, arms out for inspection, in a deep purple half-placket silk blouse and fitted black pants, hair straight.

"Gorgeous, as always. Now…let mama get dressed and I'll join you for breakfast…" Olivia turned but not before Alex got a good slap to her backside in before the detective left the bedroom.

OOOOOOOO

Olivia took the cylinder of oatmeal, the raisins and brown sugar from the pantry and a pot and began preparing the oatmeal. Even though she took what Alex said to heart, she was still uncharacteristically nervous. She was afraid of all of the negative emotions coming back and consuming her but, perhaps she was slightly embarrassed, as well—a seasoned detective reprimanded and then cast aside, banished for a month. She took another deep breath as the oatmeal began to puff and bubble, and placed her hands on the edge of the stove, closing her eyes. She hadn't slept well and was afraid her fatigue might add to her adverse mental state throughout her first day back.

Alex entered the kitchen as Olivia was spooning the thick oats into two bowls. She slithered her hands around Olivia's waist and wordlessly, gently kissed her jaw. Olivia watched as the attorney poured herself some coffee and then topped off Olivia's half-full cup on the counter before taking both cups to the table. Brown sugar, milk and raisins were already in the oatmeal, and it was ready to eat.

The women sat, Olivia willing herself to calm down, taking a small, silent breath before looking up at Alex and, catching her watching her, spoon poised with steaming oatmeal, smiled. Alex reached over and rubbed Olivia's arm softly.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

"I'll see you this afternoon," Alex leaned over and kissed Olivia delicately on the lips before looking at her once more, grabbing her attaché and exiting the car. She leaned in and said, "I love you…"

"I love you, too, Al. Wish me luck…" she tried a smile.

Alex shut the door and wiggled her fingers, Olivia waving back. She watched as Alex headed up the steps to the courts building before pulling away from the curb.

This was it. She was five minutes away from walking through the precinct doors. Pulling into the parking garage, she willed herself to take deep, cleansing breaths, anxiety seeping into her being. Putting the car in park, she shook her head, disappointed with herself for being so worked up and emotional.

Taking her keys and purse she exited the car, pressing the button and hearing the double beep of the locking and alarm on Alex's beamer. She rode the elevator to the squad room and the doors opened. She exited and looked left and right and then straight ahead. Fin was on the phone and waved, smiling. She waved and smiled back. Elliot was coming out of Cragen's office and smiled, walking towards her.

"Hey, Liv…" He patted her back heartily, never one for too many hugs. "Good to have you back." He squeezed the muscles in the back of her neck firmly.

"It's good to be back…I think," Olivia tried, still not quite sure how she was feeling.

She walked to her desk and opened the bottom drawer, throwing her purse inside and shutting it. She tossed her keys onto the desk and then adjusted her belt, gun, and badge.

"Thank God," Munch bellowed. "The sane half of Lethal Weapon." He walked up to Olivia and smiled, wrapping his arms around her and hugging her briefly. "Today, the gods will bless us with good coffee..." he peered over his glasses at her, "…or at least the _goddess_ of coffee." He patted her shoulder and returned to his desk and sat.

Cragen's voice was heard echoing throughout the space, "Benson…my office."

"Already in trouble," Fin smiled, hanging up the phone. "Welcome back, Baby Girl."

Olivia smiled at Fin, stood, walked into the captain's office and shut the door behind her.

"Good morning, Captain…" she tried.

"Have a seat, Liv."

She did as instructed and waited, Cragen standing behind his desk with his hands in his pockets looking at the floor. His eyes moved up to hers, concern on his aging face.

"How are you?"

"I'm OK," she lied. "Still trying to process everything. What happened with Mr. McAdams? His daughter?"

Cragen walked around his desk and stood in front of Olivia, looking down at her.

"That case is closed, as far as you're concerned. Mr. McAdams and his son Christopher are awaiting trial. Audry McAdams is in a new foster home. Mrs. McAdams is in a drug treatment facility in Walton." The captain sat on the edge of his desk, in front of Olivia. "How are _you_, Liv?"

Olivia couldn't help it, her tears began to fall. "Um…she looked down, fiddling with a seam on her pants. "I'm not quite sure, Captain." She looked up and smiled.

"Well…I want you to ease slowly back into this. Any calls you get, I want you and Fin and Munch to take turns going with Elliot. Got it?"

"I can do it, Captain. I don't want to be treated like a piece of china. Please, I need to see, to feel, what it was that broke me the last time," Olivia sniffed and Cragen handed her a tissue from his desk.

He took a deep breath as he watched one of his best detectives struggle. "OK…but if you feel like you can't handle something, you come talk to me. Understand?" His voice was firm yet gentle.

"I understand." Olivia recollected herself, blowing her nose and standing. She turned to leave.

"Oh, and Liv…" Cragen began.

She turned back.

"It's good to have you back." He smiled and then sat, returning to business on his desk.

Olivia smiled and left the office.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

AAAAAAAA

When Olivia didn't return her calls or text her back, Alex became worried. She was ready to go home and was just keeping herself occupied in her office until Olivia called or texted her back so that they could ride home together. Nearing seven o'clock, Alex decided to take it upon herself to walk to the precinct which was only a couple blocks away.

When she arrived, she took the elevator up, blazer over her arm, attaché and purse slung over her shoulder. She walked into the squad room and saw Olivia was one of the only ones there—save for a couple of after hours officers. The brunette was hunched over stacks of papers, another foot-high stack of folders next to it.

"Hey there…" The attorney smiled, leaning against the desk.

Olivia jumped slightly and then smiled. Alex noted the dark circles underneath her eyes, her hair was messy, as though she had been twirling it around her finger as she often did when working intently. "Hi, Babe."

"How was your day? Busy?"

Olivia leaned back, stretching her arms to the sides and then and reaching up towards the ceiling, several pops heard. Then, a left neck pop, a right neck pop, and then a deep breath. Looking at her watch, she questioned, "What time is it?"

Alex answered, "Seven…"

"Oh, Alex, I'm sorry! I was supposed to pick you up."

"Where's your phone, Liv?"

Olivia patted her pants pockets, looked in her chair, lifted papers, moved folders, looked in her drawer. "I have no idea."

"Here, let me call it." Alex dialed the number and a ring was heard in the distance. "Bathroom?" Alex smiled.

"Jeez, I'm sorry, Al." Olivia stood to go get her phone.

"Here, you stay and straighten up; I'll go get your phone. Are you about ready?"

Olivia sat and rubbed her face in her hands. "Not really, but I need to leave." She folded her hands under her chin.

"Come on, let's go home." Alex smiled and turned, walking down the hallway to the women's restroom.

When Alex came back, Olivia was ready. She turned her small lamp off and grabbed her purse, linking arms with Alex, pulling her close and kissing her cheek.

"I'll tell you one thing…" Olivia began, "…you sure are a sight for sore eyes." She leaned her head on Alex's shoulder as they walked out of the squad room and onto the elevator.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

OOOOOOOO

The women stopped an ordered a pizza to take home. It was too late to cook and both women were too exhausted. Alex stood at the counter and ordered as Olivia sat at a booth, watching the attorney pay, ogling her slender figure and her toned, alabaster legs in her skirt, looking just as impeccable as she did in the morning. She finished and headed toward Olivia to join her.

Alex sat next to Olivia, rather than across from her. The attorney smoothed Olivia's hair down and smiled. "Fifteen minutes." She leaned in for a kiss. "Do you want to talk about your day here or at home."

Olivia appreciated Alex's discretion and smiled. "I think at home. It won't take fifteen minutes. My first day back was definitely _not_ uneventful."

"All that paperwork was from today?"

Olivia nodded. "And that's one half. The other half was on Elliot's desk."

"Well, let's get home and eat and talk about it, OK?" Alex kissed the top of Olivia's head as the brunette leaned against her.

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

With half the pizza eaten, a glass of red wine had by both women, they slipped into a contented lull on the sofa, classical music playing in the background. Alex lay with her head on the arm of the sofa, Olivia lying on the opposite end in the same manner, both their legs intertwined, as Alex massaged Olivia's feet firmly. Hillary was curled up, sleeping on blankets on the ottoman next to them.

Olivia closed her eyes and moaned, "That feels great."

"Were you on your feet a lot today?" Alex dug a knuckle into the detectives arch, causing her to jump.

"Yeah, pretty much all morning and afternoon. We were out a lot pounding the pavement, as they say…"

Olivia's eyes remained closed as she enjoyed the sensations.

"Liv?"

The detective opened her eyes, left hand on her forehead, and looked at the blonde.

"How did it go?"

"I'm not gonna lie…it was hard. There were moments today that I just wanted to leave. Just get in your BMW and just come get you and leave. But…I just kept hearing your voice saying, _it doesn't have to be permanent, it doesn't have to be permanent_."

Alex smiled and took Olivia's other foot in her hands, careful of her bruised toe which turned out to be OK. "That's right." Her smile got wider. "So, how was my voice…was it my sexy voice or my authoritative voice?"

Olivia grinned and sat up, beginning to tickle the attorney's sides, Alex laughing uncontrollably.

Olivia stopped torturing the attorney, her face becoming serious. "I am still not sure, Al. I think I'll give it some more time. It was a lot of work and emotions today. I'm glad you came and got me when you did." Olivia smiled, stroking the hair at Alex's crown and then bringing her hand to rest on her cheek.

Olivia pressed her forehead to the attorney and inhaled her scent. "There's one thing I am certain of in my life, though…"

"Oh, yeah? What's that?" Alex pressed her lips to Olivia's

"Life is perfect when you're in it." Olivia's lips parted and took the attorney in a warm, hungry kiss.

"I agree one-hundred percent, Babe. Copy that and ditto."

AOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

**A/N: OK, so… I really enjoyed writing this story. Obviously, it has an ending that can be taken in many different directions and explored further, splintering off onto different avenues. NO, the wedding wasn't addressed. No, we don't know if Olivia would be staying at her job. But, these things don't matter, yet. I feel the story came full circle. It was about Alex and Olivia rediscovering each other, finding each other once again and learning that their relationship was stronger than ever.**

**I will be writing more soon, Part II will be like the Bravo Series "After the Show" or the Bachelor's "After the Final Rose".**

**I am also thinking of other pairings and will consider anything you have to give me. I have to admit, though, I LOVE Bensaro. Two sexy people…mmmmm. Mariska and Danny? Yes, please.**

**Please, please, please…if you have enjoyed my writing, I would love a favorite or follow.**

**With all sincerity,**

**Patricia**


	33. Author's Note:Love Won't Leave Sequels

**A/N: I thought I was going to do a series of one-shots. It turns out, I am having separation anxiety from my story and the characters. So, this is a part two that will probably be as long as the first part.**

**I miss the characters already!**

**I sat and sat this morning at 4:00, a sort of sick, hopeless feeling my stomach, missing the characters of Alex & Olivia. It just doesn't feel right to end it yet.**

**I thought and thought about the one-shot idea with Cabenson and the Bensaro idea and didn't have the spark like I did when writing "Love Won't Leave".**

**I want to continue this like a saga. Part 2 will be the preparation for the wedding and the wedding and the honeymoon.**

**Part Three will take place (obviously) after part 2 and will be married life, child (children) and their struggles. **

**I just couldn't let it go, so I will be renaming "Love Won't Leave" to "Love Won't Leave : Part One".**

**I hope you enjoy!**

**Patricia**


	34. Chapter 34

**Part Two of **_**Love Won't Leave**_** is up!**

**Please follow/favorite to receive new chapters!**

**Thanks!**

**Patricia**


	35. Love Won't Leave Part Two Off & Running!

Part Two is Up!

Check it out!

I would love to hear what you think. I always answer reviews as I love communicating with readers!

Please favorite me as an author and follow Love Won't Leave : Part Two to Receive all updates in chapters!

New Chapters Posted Frequently!

Thank you,

Patricia


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